I need Aries love help!

  • Spicemiss12,

    So you are waiting for him? Did you ever get an explaination as to 'why' he couldn't do it?


    I did the birth charts and the numerology charts as well...they all came out very positive. Unfortunately, I don't see the proof in real-life. I'm being patient, and coming to my wits end. At this point I feel like I'm just being strung along (whenever I say that I'm going to back off, he reels me back in) and if it's for reasons other than him wanting to get back together, then it's not fair to me and I need the opportunity and the closure for healing.

    Thing is; I've dated Aries' before and we got along great. Whereas the relationships didnt survive for various reasons depending on where we were in life, one of them has remained in my life and is my best friend. One thing I notice about dating an Aries is they usually come back, and they let you know then that they are crazy in love with you. I am confused why things are different with this one though...he's very unlike the other Aries I know....this may sound like a rediculous question, but remember I'm still learning, but are all Aries dealing with Saturn in their 7th right now? Or is it Aries that are born in his year?

  • Woude,

    Freewill trumps all. People choose to do what they do, and you have no control. People's issues sometime come to rule them, and then birthcharts and numerology are of little value. If two people are incompatible according to birthcharts or numerology, but they live their good qualities and negate the bad qualities, they may have to do some extra work, but they can have a successful relationship. Likewise, you can have a totally compatible couple, and one has baggage which rules their life, and they live by their bad qualities, there is little hope of this relationship working out. (note: "their" should be "he/she", that is correct grammar)

    You should not so much be getting stuck on that one person, as you should be looking for the person who is willing to work with you on having a relationship, someone who compliments you. It is only when you are carrying most of the load, or fighting against the other person's issues that it becomes a tiresome burden. When you have someone communicating, and cooperating, it may be work, but it does not wear you down to the bone.

  • Hey there...

    Not that I am answering for Brian but I believe the planetary effects affect ALL. I also believe that the Mercury retrograde at this time interferes as well. Communications go crazy so you must be very careful to be sure that what you say/do is interpreted as you mean it to be.

    As far as the question you posed as to if I am "waiting for him..." I am numb at the moment which makes the moving on a difficult thing. We Cancers hang on...ever look at a real Crab? We have that big pincer-claw. Once you are ours we like to keep it that way. It takes us awhile to get our bearings sometimes. "Today we're a couple--tomorrow we're not "confuses us.

    I think my Aries was overwhelmed with the thought of the responsibility of committment.

    Someone else here posted something about when Aries get their emotions involved, they need a time out to digest. I agree. What Aries fail to take into consideration in their "me" attitude is the consequences of their impulsive nature. If my Aries calls to try to reconcile, we certainly have trust issues now, right? So their behavior sets the relationship back a few steps.

    That's provided you or me give them another chance!!!

    I will ask you to try to stop being any way obsessed with what has happened. I DO know how it feels, hon. Use some "stop think" mechanism to interfere with the repeated thoughts of him.

    You cant be the best YOU if your thinking is clouded and unclear. I recommend that you journal too, if you are so inclined. Whatever gets you through this time without compromising yourself. I hope this makes some sense.

    take care.

  • Brian and Spicemiss12, you both are so right in every single word you said. Thank you so much for the support, I appreciate it all more than I can say....

  • Hi Woude,

    I am an Aries (although female) and I have to tell you that what Almondee says about him caring more than you know and the part about how we Aries tend to think too much and withdraw is right on the money.

    I have been reading through the posts here about your situation and hopefully I can address a few things that might at least help you understand his position. I am not an expert of any sort, but trying to offer some insight for you. First, the text communication about your relationship decision was a really bad idea. It's an important issue that should have been at least given the consideration of being discussed over the phone if not available in person. I got that you were away and at the time you sent the text to him it sounds as if you were fed up with the unknown course of the relationship and although understandable in a fair way, it may have come across that texting about the issue may have made it seem less important if that makes sense.

    Also, he made a point to say he didn't know why you were in Quebec at the time. He may have known the reason for your trip there, but it mattered to him in some way that you were there instead of where he was at the time or nearby where he was to discuss the issue. Aries do not like to be put in a corner sort-to-speak. We will quickly walk away if we are felt like an ultimatum is being put in our direction. You may not have intended to make your questions about what he wants to do about your relationship to come across like an ultimatum, but all the questioning and with him being stressed already it may have been taken that way.

    We do not handle stress the way other signs do. We crave a challenge. The tougher the challenge is, the better because it keeps our mind sharp. So when we get stressed out over work for example it becomes a challenge that we need to stay focused on the way someone who plays a professional sport focuses on how to win the game. It can be quite consuming, so his stress at work probably contributed a lot to your feeling distance from him as well.

    Hopefully the two of you can work things out. I just want to add that I apologize if any of what I've said here comes across as criticism toward you. That is not my intention at all. I am only attempting to explain some of the Aries personality quirks for you in effort to help. I hope it works out well for you.

  • Sandran712,

    I have to confess as an Aries that yes, we can be selfish. Not to mean the feelings and thoughts of another person is unimportant, but that we can't back down from what we feel and think to be right. Stubborn is a better word really.

    The characteristic you mention about being vain is kind of a surprise to me in a way that I am thinking, wow I didn't realize it would be interpreted that way. We can carry ourselves to appear fully confident to the point of almost cocky to others, but what most don't realize is the vanity is insecurity underneath in honesty. Nothing sends us in front of a mirror quicker than having someone we love make even an offhanded compliment toward another.

    At least this is coming from an Aries female. I know there are deeper degrees in difference of these characteristics between the Aries female and the Aries male. I once dated an Aries male who is 13 years older than me, but our birthday was the same day. Now THAT was a living portrait of love and war LOL. We loved each other deeply and passionately, but when there was an argument between us you would have thought WW III was beginning. Fireworks and cannon fire from that relationship lol.

  • i have gone through the same with my aries too !! and we stoped talking for a little while and i just went on it was sooo very hard but months later he found a way to get in touch with me and we are together now we still do not bring up that we love each other and we live together now to this day but i know he does actions speaks louder then words.... people use the word love for many thing and just throw it around and this relatoinship has taught me to restrain.... so what!!!! but it has been worth it ... i figure when u get hurt it is hard to trust again... give him time and go with it...

  • Dear Woude,

    I have been in a "relationship" with an Aries for the past 5 years, and i can't tell you how many times he and I have had conversations like yours (via text/email/phone calls). We have been doing this for the past 5 years and have "broken up" like a zillion times. I always initiate the breakups and he is always against it but agrees for my benefit. After sometime, he always finds a way to come back into my life and it's like nothing ever happened. I learnt after a while that when an Aries is stressed out with something, especially work, the best is to give them as much time as they need. We never know how much time it is, but if he loves, you, he will be miserable on his own and he will come back to you no matter what. The time spent apart from him will be hard (because of their charming, magnetic pull lol) but if you be patient, it will work out.

    Just like goldenangle44, we don't talk about our love for each other, (sometimes i do but i dont expect an answer, i just tell him how much i love him and he appreciates it), you do know when an Aries loves you. My best friend is also Aries (female) and they do seem like such selfish, uncaring and stubborn people, that they take people for granted. But deep down they have a good, kind heart, it's just that they cannot portray their vulnerability to others because they feel they have to be the pillar of strength. But when u build a deep connection with them, they will open up to you and you wll see how beautiful they really are. My Aries (male) shed tears in front of me when talking about us and his family struggles. Thats when you know, you're in an Aries' heart.

    Give him time.....especially when it comes to work related issues, he will come back (when its convenient to him) but this is something that he feels he needs to sort out for himself. Like you, I am ready for the next step in my relationship but he has not stepped up yet. But we are still together and the "recent" break up seemed like the last break up, we are finally just accepting each other for the people we are. I hope you will find happiness with your Aries, they are such loving, misunderstood people.

  • Hi I am a March Aries. And I think there is a difference between a March and April Aries guy. The word Love isn't really in my vocabulary. And I feel it's a very over used word. However when I say it I mean it. Leo's and Aries is a very exhilarating combination. We share the same likes and dislikes. We crave excitement, love and fun. We (Aries) will at times back off if we feel smothered. Even though we crave love. We are afraid of it too. I would say this. If you want him bad you better hurry and not only tell him, but show him as well. The longer you wait. The more he has to think the less likely you'll get him back. It's kind of like out of sight out of mind. Your best bet is to stay in sight. We are the baby of the Zodiac and sometimes we act like one too. We like to eat our cake and have it too. I'm very proud to be an Aries. I like working alone, being artistic, out going, having fun and laughing. Getting into a committed relationship sounds nice, but I find it hard to do. When someone gets to close I tend to put the reins on and back off a bit. I don't believe in cheating. I feel if your going to cheat stay single. There are only 3 signs that we are truly compatible with, And they are Gemini, Leo and Sagittarius. So to wrap it up I say if he is wanting space. Give it to him, but don't put yourself out of the picture, because you will lose him if you do. I hope I was of some help. Good luck to you and I hope the best for you.

  • Thank you everyone....you are all so great, taking the time to offer up your advice/experiences.

    I have backed off...I feel I have taken the proper steps (let him know how I feel about him, confirmed it with a written note sent via mail - which he really liked, and now giving him space) to show him that I support what he is going through. I feel now, it is time to just leave him alone and go on with my life.

    Brett, I don't think 'out of sight, out of mind' will likely apply here, even with me deciding to leave him alone at this point, (I could be wrong?) b/c I am all over his apartment; I'm an artist and I have done numerous paintings for him, he keeps all of my letters/cards etc in the front of a drawer that he goes in each day, there are things in his cabinets, etc....I'm everywhere. Maybe it's different for men? For women, you see that stuff and you are instantly reminded of the person.

    He did attempt to call last night, but I missed the call b/c of an event I was attending. I tried calling back a couple hours later, but no answer. So, back to my thing...just going on with my life. If he wants to reach me, he knows how.

    I suppose if I don't hear from him and this is final, then at the very least I can enjoy the memories. He will always have a special place in my heart, the confused Aries... 😉

  • Woude,

    I completely support what Brettsimms has said. I am a March Aries also and yes, you are so right about there being a difference between a March and April Aries. I know it sounds odd to other signs, but it's true. I actually have two close friends that are also Aries female, and I can honestly say there are some trait differences.

    I have the same issue of not being able to get but just so close to someone before pushing them away. I do that with relationships and I've caught myself doing the same with friendships as well. It is that smothered feeling that gives the fight or flight response every time.

    I have been in a few committed relationships and it was not easy. Not because of a fidelity factor. I don't believe in cheating either. It's the intimacy part that becomes a battle within that was hard to deal with. And I agree the word love gets tossed around too much. It commands more respect and meaning than just a word used in the everyday conversation.

    The fact that he did try to call you is a very good sign. I am sure he is missing you pretty good right about now. We are proud people, however, so it may take a little while for him to actually admit that. Good luck to you.

  • you are correct when you speak about an aries man! my aries man is very selfish, it is his way or the highway,and no matter what kind of disagreement we have, he alway's comes back. he is very strange.some people don't believe in astrology, but the traits you described fit him perfectly. it is haunting! it just could not be an coincidence,he's just like you described. aries men appear not to love and care for you, they can really hurt you,you have to be strong when dealing with them

  • kudos to you! i am an scorpio, don't believe in cheating either,what do you think about aries man, and scorpio woman?

  • Woude

    My heart goes out to you. I hate to see any relationship break up. My last girlfriend was an Aries too. Her birthday was March 21 and mine March 28. After living together and being around each other for 6 years. She committed suicide. In 3 1/5 weeks it will be 4 yrs ago. When we Aries people get into a fight or an argument we lash out with the words. We know words can really hurt. And when we do. It's not long that we start to feel bad for what we said. But by then it's to late. The damage is done. And one thing that is hard for us Aries people is eat crow. We hate to admit we are wrong. Our charisma and charm attract people to us. We are leaders not followers. And we are very artistic. We are ruled by the head so that makes us hard headed. Your probable asking yourself why I'm telling you all this. You may or may not already know it. I'm telling you this because I don't want you to give up on a Aries guy. If this guy has any sense's at all he won't let you go by the way side. Because like I said earlier. Your sign and the Aries sign is a link made in heaven. I really do hope things work out for you. You sound like a really nice person. And you deserve to be happy.


  • Thank you Marsfeml

    You have my curiosity up on the date of your birthday. I'm March 28. There are more April Aries then there is March. I think that's why there is a difference between the two. Have a great day

  • Hey Brett,

    My Aries has the same birthday as you do.

    You said that I should let him know how I feel and basically keep 'in sight'...I have let him know (probably too much, if we look at that smothering feeling an Aries can feel), but that's as much as I can do. We live in different cities, so we don't exactly cross paths. I have not heard from him since Sunday night when he attempted to call. I'm in the mind-frame now where I think it's best for me to just back off...and it scares me a bit b/c of how I am as a Leo; when a relationship ends for me, I either have already written the person off and am no longer interested (so no grief), or I am so bent out of shape over it that I have a hard time functioning. In the case of the latter, when the guy does not make the attempt to rekindle, I end up feeling hurt...Leo's and hurt feelings don't go well together, to say the least. It ends up in anger, and what happens is I will end up convincing myself that the guy is not worth my time, I end up resenting him, and I never speak to him again. 😞 I know you say not to give up on the Aries, but I'm feeling like if I even try to keep him in my mind, that I'll end up disappointed b/c he'll move on and it wont be with me. I think I am just feeling at this point that he's over it, b/c I can't understand why else someone would NOT be calling and wanting to be with you if they cared about you as much as they claimed to. But again, I am a Leo....we follow our hearts and do what it tells us to. Not our heads.

    I also wanted to say I'm so sorry you went through what you did with your ex....what an awful experience. Even though years have passed, I don't imagine you ever get over something of that nature. My heart goes out to you....:(


    I hope you are right and that he is missing me....I wish though that if it happened to be true, he would let me know... Brett, hard-headedness couldn't be further from the truth! 😮

    I also agree that the word Love is thrown around too much....how's that for a Leo statement! 😉 I think a lot of people out there think that Leo's tell everyone they love them, but not the case... We certainly love, and love quickly and fully, but that 'love' is pretty universal; pets, family, friends, lovers, inanimate objects.... Although we are loving by nature, there is still a huge difference between Love and IN Love.... So whereas we will tell everyone we care about that we love them, it's not the same as being IN love, where that dreamy, heart-skips-a-beat, passionate feeling can get the better of us. That feeling doesn't get thrown around, thankfully. I think there are unfortunately a lot of people that can't tell the difference... 😞

  • @ Brett simms

    omg Another March 28th Arian??? We are soooo misunderstood lol y'all should check out the book "The Power of Birthday Start andnumbers" by Saffi Crawford..

  • Hi Brett,

    You are very welcome. My birthday is March 25th. I feel you are right as well about there being a greater abundance of April than March Aries and that being a main attribute to the difference among the Aries characteristics. It is very nice to meet you. Have a really good day.

  • Hi Woude

    First thank you for the kind words. It is something that isn't only painful, but takes time to heal.

    Now back your situation. Aries people have no problem speaking their piece. What I can't believe is that this guy didn't speak his mind. Even though and I think it's totally cool that he and I have the same birthday. I love meeting people who have the same birthday as I.. I personally think this guy is screwing up a relationship. We've only chatted back and forth online. And I think pardon me for saying it this way. But I am an Aries and I do speak my mind. But I think you are a good catch.

    Here are a few good positive things to think about.

    No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one that is won't make you cry.

    Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

    A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

    Never frown, even when your sad, because you never know who's falling in love with your smile.

    To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.

    Don't waste your time on a man or woman who isn't willing to waste their time on you.

    Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

    There's always going to be people that hurt you, so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who trust next time around.

    Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person we will know how to be grateful.

    I really do hope that some of the things I've said to you has been helpful. You deserve to be treated like the special person you are. And I hope this guy has been seeing the feedback you've been getting from people. I hate to admit my flaws. But there are times when we Aries people are so selfish that we have our heads up our butt. I just hope he pulls his out soon. Have a great week. Good luck and take care of yourself. And remember No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is won't make you cry.

  • Hi almondee

    It truly is exciting to meet other people who share the same birthday. I have a book by Saffi Crawford and Geraldine Sullivan Called The Power Of Birthdays, Stars and Numbers. It definitely hit's the nail on the head about us. Oh and happy belated birthday. You know we share the same birthday with Reba McEntire and Diane Weist. Have a great week.

Log in to reply