Captain, you were wrong



  • You said he would never come back but he did. Now what.! he used his gitlfriend as telliing me that she was arresyed for that excuse to see me Affter I asked him why did he come back after a month he says he wasnt back his answer was because I was obessed with her, He also said that he made a mistake she wasnt right for him/ So I called him pathetic and hung up on him Is he still going to come around or is he going to stay awy this time?



  • Thanks for pointing out publically that you think I was wrong. Why then do you still want my advice? But I wasn't wrong, was I - he didn't really come back for good, did he?.

    You and he play a lot of games - you call someone pathetic and then hope he will still come back? And why would you put up with this sort of rotten treatment from someone? I think you really don't know what true love is or you wouldn't mistake this poor show for it.



  • dnnmre - nothing is set in stone, you have your own free will so will he. Don't be harsh on the Captain, she does a wonderful job. Sounds to me like this man wants to have his cake and eat it, I know I don't know the full story. He either loves you or he doesn't. I wouldn't touch this man with a ten foot barge pole. Deep down you know yourself what you have to do. I hope it all works out for you.



  • captain I didnt mean it the way it sounds I m sorry no I am not taking him back I dont want him bach but it sure as hell was a long way to go to find me really dont want him as a matter of fact i have been avoiding him as much as possible until he showed up at my house, then tells me about his girlfriend (like i really care anymore) he made his bed now let him lie in it after he told me I WAS OBESSED WITH HER thats when I called him pathetic. I am sorry for saying that to you but it came out wrong



  • I didn't know captain was a woman.



  • neither did I



  • Dnmre..I told you on your original thread that YES, he would come back to you. You keep repeating how you don't care. However, it is very obvious you do care. You want him back so you can feel like you're a good person, a desirable person. HE will NEVER be able to do that! Also the universe will not bring you someone else to be in a loving relationship with until you LEARN this lesson..."Love yourself" until you learn this and put it into ACTION you will be stuck



  • Dnnmre,

    All this drama makes it rough to have decent judgement, when it comes to dealing with your ex, or with The Captain (who is very much female). The conflict, the years of pent up frustration, the raw emotions just boil over. For your ex that is fine, but The Captain did not do anything.

    Before you "strike", especially with people on here, I would type what you have to say out in a word processing document, or write it out by hand, and then cool off (take a walk, deep breathing, anything). Then revisit it, several times if need be, before actually posting it. Easier said than done, but it is a very good idea, especially after your buttons have been pushed.

    The Captain gave you a reading, and typically you do not get anything as definitive out of her like, "he is not coming back", because things can change, but you did, you are very lucky (a lot of us wish for something so concrete). Also, coming back means coming back to stay, not a terroristic phone call, so Captain was not wrong. She has done you a favor in letting you know to move on, that the dynamic in this relationship is not love, and unhealthy. You could waste a year, two years, even longer figuring this out for yourself, she just let you know that this one is not going to happen. If you could back away emotionally, and see it objectively, which you can not at this point, you would see that.

    In order to fix what is broken here, you and he would need extensive couples counseling, and he would never put that much work into any relationship, and certainly not this one. That is not your fault, it is his shortcoming, and it has hurt you deeply, because you have tried very hard. It is okay to be hurt, and it is okay to express that, but an appropriate outlet is key. Write him a letter, and tell him how you feel. This letter is not meant to be sent, it is meant to put your stuff on to paper. The letter is for you to untangle your knots. You have plenty to say to him, so get it out, stop keeping it inside, write it out.