Cancer man is the most confusing person i've met (help would be so appreciated)



  • SO...ive been talking to a boy who is a Cancer for the past couple of months...here's the story.

    we went to a bar together and he asked me to dance...got pretty into it and i ended up sleeping over his dorm (we're in college lol) but it wasnt about hooking up..he was gentle and sweet and romantic with me and all we did was kiss. we sobered up and ended up talking the entire night...after that he texted me literally every single day, was really cute with his texts and everything.

    so the week after this i invited him to go to dinner with a couple of our friends but he couldnt cause of his frat..but he still came and hung out with me after his meeting (we were both sober) and he was being so cute with me again...when we left i wanted to go back to his room with him to hang out some more cause we were in my friends room, but he said he was tired. he texted me afterwards saying he "wasnt trying to blow you off, i do like you and i like spending time with you, i just dont hook up with ppl as a rule youre the only person ive done anything with outside a relationship and if it goes that way at some point we'll see what happens"

    so after that his texts came fewer and fewer..and then that saturday he texted me from the bar and asked me to come which i did...we danced the whole night and then i went back with him and hung out with his friends and him..he was being really cute with me in front of them and his friends even said they heard a lot about me and called me his "girl" a few times. after we left i went back to my room and then he texted me saying i should come sleep over which i did...we only made out, but it was sweet and romantic.

    after this he was barely texting me...i texted him a few times and we talked for a little but that was it. then on st pattys day we went to a mutual friends bbq and i had no idea he was going...but i could tell he was trying to talk to me, shyly...he was teasing me and stuff and then had me sit on his lap and was being generally cute with me again in front of all of our friends...he texted me a few times after i left asking what i was doing and he came to my friends house when i asked him to. we went to a party but i had to leave early and he texted me after i left asking why i left so early..we talked for a little then he texted me goodnight.

    ive seen him a couple times since then, mainly at the diner and on the way to class...he gives me these awesome tight hugs when he sees me and seems shy to talk to me...but he barely texts anymore. i texted him last saturday inviting him to a party but he said he was just gonna stay in so i said text if you change your mind and he goes "haha okay i will"

    this was last saturday. i havent talked to him since then. his ex gf of 10 months cheated on him and they broke it off about 5 months ago. hes told me he really likes me when we were at the bar a few times, and he texted saying he did. his close guy friends tell me hes "weird with girls"...i have NO IDEA what to think. help would be greatly appreciated because he is literally consuming every one of my thoughts and i really like him =/



  • Hi.......

    I was drawn to your dilema today. Mr C has a great fear of being rejected. This was highlighted when I picked the OTTER MEDICINE CARD. He may also be running from one idea to another without focus. He is having to learn lessons in the felmale energy - this represented by the otter, the personification of female energy. He is learing about not being catty or jealous. I suspect that is you have not encountered this side of him. Then these emotions, maybe were being played out in his previous relationship by him or the other person and he hasn't yet understood them.

    Your advice:

    Adopt RABBIT MEDICINE.

    If you fail to resolve a situation in your life and are unable to, you maybe frozen in motion. Wait for the forces of the Universe to start moving again. Rid yourself of any barriers of negative feelings. Accept that you are doing nothing wrong. Set a time limit on when you are no longer prepared to put up with the push and pull any longer. Even by thinking this alone, you will set the boundaries. You do not need to give him an ultimatum. Just send your thoughts up to the Universe. You need to get a grip on your thoughts, especially fears. Because sometimes people can abuse them.

    I see this senario all played out by end of May. There is a person in spirit called Johnny, he says that he is with you on this matter and will offer support. I also see a bedroom, decorated with aeroplanes.

    J SAYS: Choose the second car.

    Millie xx Blessings



  • thanks for that kind evaluation Milliesent. i think i have a vague grasp of what you're trying to convey...you're saying i should just let things happen and it'll resolve itself? because at this point i really dont know what to think anymore and im scared hes just leading me on for no reason...hes told me he likes me but im just not so sure anymore.



  • Aquariangrl,

    I do not have a lot to add. You flirted, had a nice time, kissed a little, and other stuff. It was nice, and you have a crush. That is all well and good. Like I said, he has some deep problem deep inside of him. That is not yours to fix, and if you got involved with him now, that problem whatever it is, would come back around and bite you right on your behind. So as hard as it is, count your blessings. You will be fine, I know that, but it is important that for the rest of the semester you do not let yourself get toyed with, just concentrate on your studies. Summer is going to be quite good for you. And like I said, if you wish you can contact me in the future.



  • Girl I agree with you 1000 %

    Listen to Brian he gives very good advice !



  • Kaplow,

    Awe, thanks. How goes it Missy?

    You know you and Aquariangrl should talk, you could be good friends, and sounding boards for each other. Just a thought.



  • One thing I have found about water signs - particuarly Pisces and Cancer men: when the men love and loose the girl, they need a lot of time to get back into the swing of things and to get over their last love.... gosh I can't deal with cancers and pisces lol just because I have no patience for their slowness. good luck!



  • ahh sounds so familiar....well I am a cancer and I was in a 2 year relationship with another cancer. Turned out so bad. He was always very shy, could never look a person in the eye. We'd go out to eat and I was always the only one who could make eye contact and speak to the servers. He was just rediculously shy and insecure. He went to the gym daily to build muscle because he still had insecurities about being the skinny boy in high school.

    I broke up with him so many times but he kept coming back. And he cried so much. Literally shed tears all the time. So after 6 months I called it quits and he wouldn't leave. He'd come knocking on my door constantly, and then I'd find notes with flowers on my car.

    He was also always accusing me of cheating. Every man I spoke to was a love affair. I officially called it quits after I got a job as a flight attendant. I'd call him from airports around the world to reassure him I was not cheating. 2 months into my new job I ended it for good. The whole "whose voice is that in the background...I hear people" freak out phone calls while I was working was a little too much.

    I remember saying "ummm I'm working on airplanes, and I'm in an airport and people travel this way, yes there are people."

    haha that's just my experience with a shy/insecure cancer man.

    I have to agree with almondee, after the official break up he still continued to email, call, text, and knock on the door...until I moved and changed all my information, and a year ago he found me on facebook and I had to block him.