ASCLAC part 2
Hey katie! After the disastrous phone call last night, no, he left this morning about 12 hours ago, still in transit probably arriving soon in the US-it takes 2 days to get to Brazil, so I probably won't hear from him.
I really didn't think he would be so defensive...he had the nerve to tell me he didn't remember that I was going to be in Manila until March 29th...
It's ok, I'm not going to dwell on it..let him have fun in Brazil..just letting him go like you said. I did ask him if he still wanted to see me in Hong Kong, and he did not say yes, he just said "Maybe I can take some days off".. It's ok, I've contacted another friend to see in Hong Kong and in the process of contacting another friend..
When I see him or talk to him I won't mention this whole thing..but I am going to start making less effort and stop chasing him. I wish I could disengage my emotions a bit so I am not so affected by him..I'm going to spend the next month reflecting on what I can learn from this experience. I am also starting my new nutrition and training program on Monday..focus on my fitness consulting business, finish my translations, start writing my book, setting up my website, etc etc.. I am also going to do ssome major spring cleaning in my house to get rid of clutter, old things etc..I'm going to transform myself.
i believe that when comments dont appear it's not because the pages of the thread are too many, but cause the forum is acting up. cant read what Lua wrote, does not appear.
really? it appears fine on my page!
Yes..that is what I said before. The forum has been having issues for a couple a months now on and off.
I can see what both of you wrote though.
busy day, might not get a chance to respond today
just wanted to let you know that i'm meeting Aries for dinner tonight hehe
Is there a moon where you are? lol!!!!!
Listening to Aaliyah ...Read between the lines ...(actually the entire CD)
I am trying to catch up ...so I hope I don't miss much
So this is the good thread now???
ok so it looks like they deleted all my posts on my other user, but it still looks like the other ASCLAC thread is there...::whew:: didn't cause any problems lol
Flow - I'm hoping the moon will be out tonight
moon - day number 2 of no contact from scorp haha maybe this time it's really over and he's finally letting me go
if i have time ill respond tonight after the date, if not, you'll hear from me bright and early tomorrow! lol
SV - Yup!
enjoy you dinner with aries kel!
I read your previous posts and I must say you do have a controlling streak with you. Why I say this because you mentioned him not telling you that he hangs out with his friends without you. People needs this.
Me for an instant after my previous controlling relationship I made a rule that I don’t want that no more. This is one of the very first topics I addressed to Libra. I don’t want to be sharing my every move. This does not mean that I am seeing/ meeting other men ...it’s just I want to feel that I can be my own person without having a leash around my neck. Now I know he has an issue with that because one of his previous girlfriends did try to fool around by lying about her where about.
So confidence in oneself and the other is important. I also go out alone. And this came about because I do like to have peace of mind. Me and my thoughts. Like yesterday I was out since morning. After my morning appointment I had time to kill until singing class. I went to the movies then after I sat outside on a bench and just relaxed. I didn’t call anyone and I didn’t text anyone. I just sat down looked at the tourists and everybody who was outside enjoying the weather. Now if I was with Libra or any other guy it would have been different. Yet I can easily go on a girly night or a mix group night.
I am not entirely sure that you guys should spend time together right now. Yet this is how I see it because it seems to add fuel to the fire every time you do meet.
That he smokes and gambles isn’t good. Yet I was told that some people have so much pressure that they resort to these things to feel “alive” somehow. I wouldn’t know I don’t do either. Libra guy used to. I told him I don’t like it and I hope he isn’t doing any of it anymore.
I agree when you said not being intimate with him is a good thing for the time being. That is what saved me from being all a mess now with my situation with Libra. I think if I jumped into that just like that I probably wouldn’t be this calm about it all. I am not happy about it but I can hold my cool.
I was so please to read when you said you need to get honest with yourself about who you are as a person. YAY...big step forward.
I like what you wrote to Moon about leaving the messages that she send to her Scorp be gifts. They are indeed.
Thanks to you and Shorty for the astrological update. I certainly have been feeling some of it.
Weww..took me a while to get through everything but I think I covered it all.
Hey flow hope singing is keeping you busy.
Katie- freckles cafe.... what a cutie pie. I love it! ahhhhh.....
SV- Hello! Good to see you back. Anything new?
Kel- dont do anything I wouldnt do... where is dinner?
OMG! Nooooo Scorp is not writing you off... he's figuring out his next move. Hey, Shorty, how does retro grade effect water signs like all of us???
stranger- hi, did you hear back from your scorp yet?
Shorty- hi! I am looking up the whole retro grade thing and it's a tad technichal. What I am getting is it's sort of a soul searching type of period where we reach inside ourselves and try to find/fix/feel better? Ahh.. I dunno.
A better question would be.... How does retrograde effect me (not me personally... lol... me like everybody as an individual).
Lua- any news?
Me? no word from scorp.... but i'm not expecting any so it's ok.
The Sagg, OMG! He is ignoring me hard and I don't know why. I don't like it.
I was in a bad mood at work today. This guy (who I am not so fond of) is retiring so we had a party for him.
The whole group was like "moon, get in the picture" and I was like "nahhhh, you all get in and I'll take it...."
Then suddenly this weasel girl starts yelling to Sagg "Sagg, Take the picture so moon can get in"
and I was like "no, weasel, really, I'm good"
and sagg was loving every bit of it I could tell. He was smirking.
I was getting so annoyed and Weasel for making such a scene with Sagg. I couldn't even look Sagg in the face.
F-ing Weasel, it's soooo obvious she has a crush on Sagg, I hate how she was "using" me as the excuse to call him over. "Oh, Sagg, come here... we need moon" OMG! I wanted to slap her right in the face! YUK!
Anyway.... Katie, Kel anybody..... Any Sagg advice?
Day two... no contact... from him or me. I dont like this... oh well, he's keeping Scorp off my brain that's for sure.
Oh yes strannger- reading flows post I meant to tell you that before about the email like "gifts" for him. That was such a good way to look at it.
My gift to him is allowing him in my life still.... just a toe in the door, but it's enough for now. The real gift is him still getting to know me, my thoughts, my feelings with out any emotional overflow. He responds when he wants... but's not obligated.
A shadow of the type of relationship he wants right now.
Stranger- I loved that way of looking at it. Thank you.
Hi girl...sun was great yesterday and today. I couldn’t help but smile when I read that you had enough of carrot cake. I couldn’t agree more...lol. That’s why I don’t bake much. People like it and they keep asking for the same then the fun factor is out for me. Yet you do have different variation to the cake so see what works in the long run.
Shorty, Aahhhh tax!!! I got one more form to fill out. Will be doing that tomorrow. So no news from your Crab huh? I am starting to wonder if my Libra has Cancer in his chart or if this retrograde is helping him a hand in hiding. I must confess that I do have a picture of him to cross over my time. My son made it in a previous encounter. *blushes* Kids with cell and camera...lol About that retrograde...I have felt the Saturn one..not sure about Pluto ...I might and I might not... Singing was great yesterday. It was just like a great deal of stuff fell into place. Teach was less chaotic and I was more confident and relaxed so I sounded much better. She is teaching me to sing in a high pitch....and believe me I need a great deal of work in that department to sound anything descent. We had to practice on short part of “I’ll be there from MJ” Today I was blazing Aaliyah’s last CD and now I noticed how difficult here lyrics compositions are. When you listen it doesn’t sound so..but get into the words and the pace she goes through them all...it’s like WOW for me.
No news from Libra. Don’t expect it either...remember he is not the calling type for chit chat. If I want that I would need to call instead. And he put me on this swimming program so for now no appointment.
You’re doing fine with your emails just don’t overkill. Uhmm double back...you emailed him every day??? Hmmm ...why did you do that?
My son didn’t see my ex over the holidays. He is not much into the holidays as I am. I think it’s a male thing...(sorry Kel...lol).
Question ...your concentrating on Scorpio and Sagg? When do you concentrate on you???
We should definitely get Kel for calling me mama. LOL.... I got feathers!!!
Kel, I hope you had a great dinner. And noooo no sister Flowsco or any other variation...just flow or flowsco. ;-p
Not my singing have me busy ...it's my other projects and coaching that I am doing. Besides I am a single mom...so need to give my son some attention as well. lol
I am going to bail on you because it's wayyyyyyy past my bedtime and I have a long day yet again. I will try to check in.
Take care girly.
that has upset me a bit . the things is that i have been told that he has been like this with other women too , not just me. that he tends to put like a kind of blanket over his women. what really frustrates me ( and i have told him this before) is that i dont have a problem at all with him seeing his friends without me and doing his own thing, but i dont see why he has to hide it from me. and i am not asking for his every single move.. it just annoys me that he deems it ok in his own mind to ask me of my every move, he wants to know where i am and what i do, but clams up or lies when it comes to him. i hate the lying. and it makes me feel like he thinks i am holding him back which is soo untrue! if anyone understands freedom and the importance of it its me! i felt he was the controlling one ant the beginning because he had a problem with me going out .. i remember in the first two weeks i was invited to a friends birthday celebration, he knew the girl, he was welcome to come but didnt then got jealous and insecure and said he didnt like me going out all the time.i just hate double standards and the fact that he just didnt trust me- asking me if i had been hit on by guys etc.. it just made me doubt him, his belief in me and us. i had never really experienced that before and i didnt want to lose him so i didnt go out as much well not at all really..in hind sight now i wouldve stood up to him more instead of being such a pushover. but i cared about his feelings and thought maybe in time it will get better and he will be able to relax and trust me more.so i spent more time with him.. we would go out to the movies together etc sometimes see a concert but not very often. i tried to include him with my friends invited him to things but he never came. it hurt me to be honest. he would stay at home.. then be a bit sulky when i got home. sometimes he would be ok, it would depend. i just felt like we were living separate lives and the time we spent together was always just us, never with anyone else. i got used to that. but i could feel a certain restlessness in him, that he couldnt speak of. i felt like he wasnt being clear about his own needs, and then kind of blaming me or using me as a scapegoat. or picking a fight to escape me! i hate smothery guys and i do believe in some autonomy, but there needs to be some openness surely. and yeh it does worry me cos it makes me feel like i am the big bad mother that is going to tell off the naughty little boy when he gets home..ugh!! that thought revolts me! it is like he gets a bit of a rush from being sneaky, naughty,etc. and i also just wonder who he is? and maybe i would like to go out with him to a bar and get drunk with him one night..and have fun with him. why has he put me in a box?? this really hurts me flow. is it like he needs attention from other women in order to feel ok in himself? it is all starting to feel fraudulant.
no i havent heard from scorp, i am not expecting to. the last contact was a text he sent to me on monday night which i replied to.( i already stated that in a previous post). where it stands now.. is i am trying to focus on me. i told him when he came over on monday that i have already made some calls to some counsellors. so i will see if he mentions it again. i doubt he will. i am still torn over whether to arrange it myself or not. i know that we have gotten used to spending alot of time apart. its like the pendulum swings.. it swung us together on monday. and now it is swung apart, until the next time..and there seems to be a build up in between. i am leaving it all up to him . actually i dont know what i am doing.
you mentioned a while back that you thought we had been thru all the stages of a relationship.
im not sure that we have.
i am interested to know what your thoughts are on stages of a relationship.. for your own life.
la la la...I am on cloud 9 right now...had a GREAT date with Aries...think we might see each other again this weekend..................
sorry moon but i think i'm all set with my Scorp lol
aries treats me how i WISH scorp did...he's such a gentleman and treats me like a gentleman (maybe it's our cappy moons)
but i'm really digging this guy
la la la
i'll respond to you gals tomorrow, just wanted to give a quick update
la l ala hahahaa
my head is in the clouds right now
lol. i feel like singing with you!!! sounds nice.. and yeh gotta say your charts did look pretty good- alot of similarities hey. your head is in the clouds.... just make sure you keep those feet of your on the ground too ahhhh that feeling.. i miss it.x