Captain, Hans? Change in direction -reading/help with forsite -advice -anything



  • Oh boy - some of you kind ous already know my divorce story. Husband moved out last January, filed for divorce, bought a condo, etc. etc. Subsequently - I am financially in dire straits due to his mismanagement, taking inappropriate advice from the worng people and basically never admitting that someone else (like an attorney) might actually know more than he does. On Friday I emailed him the actual expenses of the home I am living in - should be nothing new to him - he lived here - he insisted he knew what I could live on and he calculated inappropriately. I gave him clear Excel files of attorney expenses, home repair expenses and medical expenses.

    I told him I was going to decalre bankrupcty and that I would have to consult with a bankruptcy attorney on Monday. I also got two more credit cards cancled this weekend and another had the limit kowered to the balance, so I cannot even charge my attorneys fees and I cannot pay them cash as I have none.

    In addition - because I have been looking for roomates to share my home with, I have interviewed far too many people and had too many people come into my home. The last one turned out to have a very BAD background check which I will not discuss here, so now I am afraid to live here alone with my little girl.

    After a fairly civil discussion, we have come to the conclusion that the only reasonable alternative is for him to rent out the condo and for he and my oldest daughter (who is a real pill to me) move back in temporarily while we knock out these debts and figure out as much as we can before going to the attorneys. I thought temporarily meant 6 months - Now he tells me he found a renter but had to give them a 1 year lease. I just don't know how I am going to deal with this. Its better than going bankrupt, and it will get my credit rating back on track so maybe I can actually move myself. But it means my potential freedom is delayed again. (On the other hand, I would not be free if I was bankrupt anyway)

    Can anyone see anything with this. I have explored everyother way that I can think of and this seems to be the most logical (although possibly not favorable) choice possible.

    What I would like to know - if anyone can offer this sort of help - if you see the debts being paid and him moving out before the end of a year and if this is really the most favorable choice? Thanks TD



  • Looks like you're stuck with him for a bit honestly. Just make sure you continue to be very succinct with your expenses and review it at least once a month with him just to know where you guys stand. That seems to be the best way to alleviate a necessary evil 🙂



  • Thanks Tricks! This one really threw me for a loop - after all I have been through over the last year this is just about the last straw. There was "supposed" to be enough after refinancing the house to pay off the majority of these debts, but due to his misconception of the true appraisal value of our house and what we would actually get back in taxes - well what can I say - Mr KNow IT ALL did not know.I don't think he even harbored a reasonable guess.


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