Is my husband cheating?

  • I have a feeling my husband is cheating or thinking about cheating. He is a porn hound and can not stay away from it. I don't know what to do. 30 years of marriage & scared.

  • Do u have any evidence of his cheating? And what makes you thing this is what he;s doing? Need more deals for anyone to help you.

  • You say you have a feeling. What does this feeling come from? Has his behavior changed in some way. Is there some piece of evidence that makes you feel this, phone calls, receipts?

    Is he gone for periods of time and you do not know where he is and makes up an excuse?

    We all have feeling of neglect some are well founded and some are our own insecurities. I would say look long and hard at what is making you feel this way.

  • Why do you feel this sunlightmoon?

  • been married for 23 yrs,he's 49 and i'm 45...i've never cheated on him,,but he's abuse of my trust..he's was cheating on me 7 yrs ago..then we got together but he confuseme by the other person when talking to me..that he sit's in the computer for hours and check womens pictures..yes i caught him..then in my face he stares at women..i just want to know if is worth it..staying with himm..i'm tired..and hurt... thank so much

  • what's his sign/bday - what's yours??

  • Sunlightmoon,

    A wife's intuition is that is this strong, on such a serious matter, is rarely incorrect. What to do? You confront him. What else to do? You can talk about your relationship in the bedroom, that will be important. However, do not overlook his need to be admired by you (you need to be appreciated, he needs to be admired, it is an oversimplification, but it is valid). That is kind of how you both get into the bedroom, the admired/appreciation thing.

  • Dear gypsy64 and sunlightmoon,

    I have been married 26 years and I am now separated since August from my husband. I have know him 32 years been together forever. At first I was in mourning. That was the first 4 months. I tell you it was hard. But now I can sleep at night, go where I want, don't have to answer to anyone anymore. I go out on weekends and I am having a blast doing things HE never wanted to do. I can't say I don't still love him he was a wonderful husband and great father. But now I don't know why I stayed with him so long. He is a complete different person, is ashamed and guilty of his cheating so he really doesn't want to be around our children. My children and I have gotten very close, and that's more important to me. If your really not happy life is to short. Find yourself and get a life of your own. Once the trust is gone so is the marridge. Good Luck to you both.

  • These all sound so familiar! I was married for 30 years last Sept. My husband asked me for a divorce in dec. Moved out Xmas eve. Our divorce is just getting under way., He has found a D airline flight attendent. she is 2 years younger than me but, looks 50 years older! She says he wants change. She also wants his money. Her husband told me that. Apparently, my husband has been cheating with different women for the last ten years. He works out of town, coming home for the weekends. He said we had a beautiful 30 year marriage! Why would he do this? we have 2 sons 25 and 28 YO, they say kick him to the curb MOM! It hard, I loved him with all my heart, Cut his hair, did his laundry, kept a beautiful home, and was honored to be his wife. Now, it will all be gone. We are 54YO. I will take my half, and more. The girlfriend won't be happy, and the old man will get to work the rest of his life. I pray to God all the time., but, I need to prepare for ME. I have put it in Gods hands. My friends say I will be much better in the end. I question how I can be better when I thought I had the best? Good luck to all of you in this situation. It has not been pleasant, but, I will survive.

  • I found out that my husband was cheating (and with the same woman for 6 years). I forgave him as he had other problems ~ drinking. So he went to AA and we did counseling. Yet 2 years later, I found out that he was back at all of it and then some. I wanted to run not walk to the nearest divorce attorney but to complicate matters, my mother died that same week I planned to leave. I should not have let that stop me but I did. I chose to stay thinking I was not strong enough to deal with the loss of my mother and my marriage...boy was I wrong. I finally left him and he has been begging to get back in. One thing that I know is that he will not change for me, our children (we have 4, ages 6-13) or anyone else and it is going to take a miracle to get him to want to change for himself. Being divorced for 4 years now, I know my decision was the right one. I had prayed and cried about it but refused to listen to the messages I was getting because I thought marriage was supposed to be forever. He can kick rocks. You may not want to believe what you feel but our gut is rarely incorrect. God bless you.

  • all I can say is that you have been married for 30 years

    I can't imagine you don't know him enough to tell whether he is cheating or not

    I've never been cheated in marriage, but I have gone through it in relationships

    I really hope that you already find the answer to that question now

    it's been almost 2 months

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  • My ex husband who is a divorce lawyer and was cheating with his ex wife that he always made fun of and talked about how fat and ugly whe was....always said that if a wife feels like her husband is cheating then usually he is...and mine was . I hope this helps you. Trust yourself and your feelings!

  • LOL, where is the original poster? of course it makes sense for readers not to waste their time giving advice. sigh....

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  • woman922

    I was thinking the same thing. "Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater".

  • Ah and the saying goes, Great Minds Think Alike!!!!


  • Hi, You know him better than anyone, unless he's secretive and real good at covering up. Something just ran thru my mind. Offer him a few drinks and see if he starts talking about anything----anything. If you get a vacant or vacated feeling around him--watch out. Sex addiction is like any other addiction it's can be hell.

  • Hi my husband and I have been married almost 9 years but been together for 12 he recently file for a divorce but never talks to me about anything we still live in the same house but sleep in diffrent rooms, so sad and Im so very hurt and upset about this, I think he is now seeing someone else I just picked up the phone and saw a number I didnt know, so I called it and a woman answered and she said her name was patricia, Im so upset about this, not only did he blind side me with the divorce he took all our money from our account and Im left with living on 50 aweek from child support.

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