Am I being used?



  • I think that my supposed love of my life is living another life behind my back, either he is or I just can't trust again! We have been seeing eachother for approx. 8 months,other then taking a trip, wich he paid for to Monserrat afew weeks ago, he only sees me during the day stating that his house is rented out and he is living with a friend. According to him we are going back to Montserrat at the beggining of may(origioally the 3rd week or april). I have been giving him money to help defray the cost of the trip. He introduced me to swingers clubs that we frequent appr. 2 times a week, although I don't share and neither does he. But that is the only time we can make love. He has all of a sudden during the last 3 days gotten angry over me texing him or calling him,as I didn't see him for the past 3 days including Easter as he said he had to work! I was with him today and he was very distant(we went to the "club" and he didn't even make love to me!) I don't even have an address for him only a phone number! He is a taures and I am a loving leo, He is 66 and I am 46. Sounds like a snow job or am I just insecure!



  • My gut instinct....he's married. Why would you frequent a swingers club if you don't participate? And....are you sure you are the only one that he is bringing there? He knows about the club but doesn't participate? I would think that there would be rules....and trust me I could be wrong...but those clubs usually aren't just for going and having sex with one partner. I'd say this warrants a little more investigation. Maybe you could ask around the club if he's only there with you???? Good luck....



  • I agree with you and thankyou for the reply. My gut has never done me wrong. He also wants to leave by 5 o'clock pm. and on the way home today his phone rang 2 times and when I asked he said "it's business and I don't feel like talking " But GOD forbid if I get a call he won't stop till he knows who it was!! I really like him and for some reason I have not completely jumped of the edge, I guess there was a reason why!!



  • Oh...I think you need to move on. I didn't want to say it originally but yes, my instinct is telling me you are being used. Nice guys can use people too. There are interesting threads here on love vs lust, forgiving and letting go, all very good information. Blessings to you. Have strength and love yourself more. You are the best thing for you. :0)



  • I have been struggling with that discision for about the last 2 weeks. I have overheard comments from him"i can see her anytime I want she dosn't work!!" and then have caught him in several lies, He was so loving and seemed so sincere, always opening doors and never says no to me. But the last few days he (after being with me everyday last week) all of a sudden has things to do. I really can't believe that he was working on easter and had the excuse that he had to have the job finished by sunday! I am not even sure what he does. This is going to break my heart, and this will be the last time I EVER TRY AGAIN to find the TRUE ONE!!!!


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