A Classic Romance Story...
I've had an interesting experience of late, and I thought I would share it with you all... It feels like a true classic romantic tale, and amazingly it's happening to me!
I met Steve for the first time in 1977, when we both auditioned for our middle school's school play "You're a Good man Charlie Brown". I was in 8th grade, and he was in 9th. He was cast as Snoopy, and I was cast as Patty. Our teen romance really started though, after we both attended a teen disco one Saturday at a dance club in our town of East Meadow, on Long Island in New York. He liked the way I danced, and I thought he was really cute. After writing me a little love note, we started "dating". We had so much fun rehearsing for that play, and hanging out at a local park on the weekends...
Sadly, just before the performance of the play, his father passed away quite suddenly of a heart attack. I remember how devastated he was, and how little I could do for him at such a young age, and with little experience with loss myself... He was a real trooper though, and went through with that performance in honor of his Dad. He got a standing ovation every night...
Ours was a short-lived romance though, because he was a year older and moved on to the high school before me. I continued on in middle school, performing in another school play the following year. I didn't have any other romances that were as sweet and as fun as ours though... In the meantime, he met a new girl through a friend who he hung out with at the local roller rink. Her name was Adrian, and she would play a pinnacle role in the outcome of our future reunion two years later...
The following year I moved on to the high school, and was cast in the leading role of "The Fantasticks", as a sophomore! I played opposite another boy, as Steve did not make the cut for that show. He was still dating Adrian, and I dated a few other boys that year as well. We somehow remained out of each others lives for that whole year, but in my junior year we both auditioned for the play "Hair", and were cast in the leading roles together. That's when we struck op our romance for the second time...
I have so many memories of that time of my life. Mostly with him, and the other cast members of that play. We were young and free, and we relished that in all the ways that people our age did in those days... It seemed like everything was perfect. Unfortunately, very close to the performances of the play, we had some kind of falling out though. I can't remember what it was about (funny how we can easily forget the bad things!), but as a result, he wound up back in the arms of Adrian. Although that was short-lived, a pregnancy resulted, and just in time for our performance of our play, Adrian broke the news to him. He did tell me about it, and it broke my heart. I turned my back on him, knowing that he would now have to make a very major decision that could change his life forever. I felt he had no other choice. He would have to pick Adrian over me. It was just too much for my 16 year old psyche to handle, so I walked away from him forever...
Now, let's fast forward to the year 2000... I was married for 3 years to my best friend and musical collaborator of 15 years, and soul mate Mike. (That is a whole other story I could write about as well. Maybe another time...) We were running a large storage facility in Plantation, FL, and I happened to go on the internet one day to the site Classmates.com that I had just heard of recently. I also happened to go to an open message board where people could post inquiries about people, and share their stories. Lo and behold, I spotted my name on there! It was posted by my old love Steve, and he was asking if anyone had information about me. I was shocked and flattered that after all those years, he would still be interested in what happened to me. I did not respond to him though, as I was happily married, and would never have contacted an old boyfriend out of respect for my husband. So I just put his inquiry out of my mind, and went on with my life as it was...
Let's fast forward again, to the year 2002... Mike and I moved from Plantation, to a little house we had bought in a rural part of the Florida Panhandle. We moved there after we got laid off from our storage facility gig. It was post - 9/11, and the economy was tanking. People were re-evalulating their lives, and many gave up their storage spaces as a result. After we moved, I found out I was pregnant with our son Eric! So we had him in October of 2002, and lived our lives happily and simply on our little property in the country...
Sadly,Mike had some health issues, and as a result, in July of 2006 he suffered 4 minor strokes. He recovered quite well considering, and we thought we were in the clear after two years. We were wrong... On August 6, 2008 he died suddenly, when a blood clot entered his lungs and killed him instantly. Quite tragically, our son found him first lying on our couch, and then he came to get me. He was gone. My husband of 11 years, and best friend and soul mate of 23...
In the meantime, unbeknownst to me, Steve had continued looking for me. I learned of this in 200t, when he finally contacted my brother, who still lived on Long Island. Steve had sent him a letter asking if he was my brother, and if so, could he let me know that he was looking for me. My brother forwarded the letter to me, but as my husband was still alive then, I did not respond to it. I did keep it though, and put it away in an old journal of mine... After Mike died, I remembered that I still had it. So, some time later I decided to write him to tell him what had happened. I just felt compelled to contact him, knowing that he was so focused on finding me all those years. I wanted him to know what had happened in my life, and I wanted to find out why he had looked for me for so long...
After he received my letter, he replied with a very sweet letter of his own and gave me his email address to continue writing him. It turned out that at the time that he was looking for me, he was separated from his wife, but now he was back with her. So we just caught up on all those years we had missed, and he became such a good friend and major part of the grieving and healing process for me. He was also able to give me quite a bit of insight into my son's loss, having lost his own father at a young age...
I also learned from him that Adrian had terminated the pregnancy that occurred back in high school. It was a decision that they made together, and one that haunted him for years to come... They did stay together though, and he finally did marry her, a few years later. It didn't last... She was his first wife, and he was now living, as it turned out, quite unhappily with his second. He told me in our correspondence, more than once, that he had always wondered what would have happened if he had made a different choice all those years ago. He also spent quite a bit of time reflecting on our relationship back then, and all that it fulfilled in him. He confessed that he was never really able to recapture that feeling with anyone else...
So, fast forward again to the present... After a year and a half of corresponding by email, and an occasional phone call, Steve is in the midst of a divorce. His soon to be ex-wife is out of the house, and he has custody of their two children. In the meantime, I have progressed through the agonizing grieving process, and yet of late have found myself thinking of the possiblity of making a fresh start with someone new. We have been there for each other through it all, being supportive and listening to each other, as we deal with the various trials and tribulations of our lives. Then one day, a few weeks ago, when he had a little extra time, he called me. We talked for two hours... and something just "clicked" with us... That was a few weeks ago... Now we talk every night, and have found out some very strange and unexplainable correlations between our lives. Living in the same place, at different times, making very similar choices in our lives (some of them bad), and both of us always wanting to reach our fullest potential but just falling short of it. Despite all the talent we both had and still have, neither of us ever achieved any measure of success using it.
Then the other night he told me a story of a trip he had taken years ago, to a very romantic place (Venice, Italy), that was unfortunately with the wrong person (his soon to be ex-wife). It was a classic "comedy of errors" sort of story. I told him that I had a similar story about a trip I had taken with an old boyfriend of mine, back in 1990. It was to Puerto Plata, in the Dominican Republic. We stayed at the Playa Dorada Hotel. It turned out, that not only had he been to Puerto Plata just one year before that, but he stayed at the exact same hotel! So strange... And he lives now in a town not very far from where I went to college, in upstate New York. These are just a few of the interesting correlations between us... He also makes me laugh like only one other person could, and that was my late husband. He is a true storyteller, and an intellect, and a wonderful father to his children. All the qualities I am looking for in a man...
So now we are talking about a meeting between us... The only problem is that he lives 1,200 miles away! Such irony... and quite a roadblock if this is truly meant to be for us. I want so badly to believe that we are supposed to be together. Because after losing my husband, and the pain and anguish that has caused me, I have needed so desperately to believe that I could find true love once again. That maybe, just maybe our paths were meant to cross again. That the flame of love we shared all those years ago was meant to be reignited. Especially now, when we are both alone... Fate has brought us together again, and now we need to see if it is our destiny to be together. I ponder the idea that maybe he was my first, and is my next and last, true love...
I don't know who will read my story, but I felt compelled to tell it... I have gained such great insight, and met such wonderful, caring and giving people on here. Maybe someone will have a similar story to share, or will have a sense or feeling about us and want to share it with me. I invite any and all of your input, insight and similar stories or experiences. Maybe I can learn something from them that will help me decide what the next step should be for me, and for my son...
February 9, 2010
What a wonderful story! I read the whole thing. I think that you should try to meet and see what happens. Especially now, with Valentine's Day coming up...how romantic would that be? If you are truly meant to be, love will find a way. I wish you both the best!
I am sorry for your loss.I know this post was very hard for you to compose because it open hurt feelings of your husband.
I had loss my husband suddenly too from surgical complications. When there is a sudden passing of a love one and you do not have the time to say good-bye..it just hurts so much more.
I know that my husband and I were soulmates because during our 20 year marriage we could read and understand each other thoughts.It was like the two of us was only one person.
I am still going through the grieving process.
Unlike you I have not found my way to another love. I congratulate you for completing much of your journey.
I have worked in a major trauma hospital for 20 years and I afraid to tell you that when you see ministrokes ( small strokes ) this is a clear sign that eventually a major one will come into play in a short time.
It is hard to understand but I think your husband was very fortunate to pass so quickly. Why I say this...My dad suffered from a major stroke and lived for five years because his strong heart. He was confined to a wheel chair and needed constant personal care. My dad did not want to live like this because this was not living but existing.
Sometimes patients in the hospital who have had strokes are hooked up to machines and this is not living but existing.
I think it is wonderful that Steve and you have a connection. I am so glad Steve can help your son through this difficult journey.
You know that saying,' if you let love go someday it will return to you."
Oh, I am so excited that you have responded already!
Dear Darkeness angel,
You have responded to me before, and I am so glad you did again... I am glad you enjoyed the story, and we are both very determined to meet somehow. I just remembered another thing... He met a woman back in December that had to sign closing papers with him on a mortgage. They talked over coffee for awhile, and he told her a bit about his current situation. A few weeks later she googled him and got his work email address, and wrote him. She seemed interested in him, but he wasn't in her, so he eluded to the fact that he wasn't due to his divorce, etc... Well, just a few days ago, she wrote him again and said she had a "no strings attached" offer for him. She has a free plane ticket coming to her for some award she won, but she can't use it before it expires. She thought of him, and how he might need a break, and offered it to him. He thought immediately about using it to come see me, yet in good conscience, he felt guilty about taking it from her for that reason... So, we both agreed that the timing of this offer was uncanny, to say the least! What do you think about it? I hope he uses it, and tells her went to visit an old high school friend. At least he wouldn't be lying... : o )
Thank you so much for your post...
I had very similar experiences with my husband. reading each others thoughts, and his ability to even enter my dreams... We shared so much over the years, especially music. He played guitar and I sang. That's how we met. He was a songwriter, composer, poet, and a short story writer. He was also a dreamer! A true Aquarius... (He was actually a triple Aquarius, Sun/Moon/Ascending!)
Believe me, I am still going through the grieving process too! I think that will go on for a long time. Yet my heart is big, and I am still young, and well... Steve has come along at a good time.
It's just the logistics of it all that are a problem! When did your husband pass?
Thank you also for the information regarding strokes. His mother suffered some minor ones, and then was diagnosed with a class4 geoblastoma in 1997, the year we were married. She died shortly thereafter. He was always afraid that would happen to him... I know in my heart and soul that he was happy to go the way he did, especially here at home. He would have begged me to disconnect if he had been attached to machines, and I could not have been able to handle seeing him that way. So, for us, this was for the best...
So my friend, continue your grieving, as I will, but take heart that if it is meant to be, love will find you again. I hope it has found me again, and he is a good man and role model for my son...
Jazzsinger, sometimes I truly believe that we are simply "stepping stones" for an item to get delivered to the right person. I used to do animal rescue work, and I would save an animal from a bad situation, nurse it back to health, and then see it went to a good home where it would be taken care of. I felt that I was simply that stepping stone that the animal needed to get from point A to point B.
When I read your post about the woman who offered him the ticket, the first thing that popped into my mind was that she was the stepping stone that would allow you two to connect. Tell him what I explained to you, and tell him not to feel guilty about it. If it wasn't meant to happen, it would not have. And you're right, he can always tell her that he went to go visit an old High School friend.
Oh I can believe your post because it seems my story runs along the same lines. I can feel your energy as you convey your thoughts to me.
My husband had sudden passed away in September 2009. My husband was a scorpio and I am a cancer.
I describe our relationship and marriage like sticker than tape and tighter than twine because we would do everything together...fix the car, go to the bank, food shopping...
The astrologers say this marriage is made in heaven because we are both water signs which means were could read and understand each others thoughts and emotions.
I always remember the saying, " the two shall become one." and that how we were as a couple.
I met my husband while studying for my law exams.He was always intrigue with my brain power and how I was doing a zillions of things at the same time.We both loved oldies music. I think God had placed me there to take care of my husband until God was ready to take my husband to heaven.
My husband passed away at home. When I found him slumped over in our bedroom I attempted to do CPR on my husband but I knew God had already taken him to heaven.
When you mention about your mother-in-law having these strokes my mother-in-law had a massive heart attack and that is how my husband passed away.
Just like your husband mine was always worried about if he would see 50 because his mom passed away at that same age.
The heart and stroke problems run in families.
My husband and I had several talks about passing and I said only God picks your time and not you. I think it gave him great comfort that his mom was waiting for him on the other side and I would joke with him to go see the other woman in your life.
In fact, I knew he loved his mom a lot and instead of us being buried in a family plot I had him buried two rows away from his mom.
I know his spirit can rest because he is with his mom on the other side.
Dear Darkness angel,
Thank you again for sharing your story, and for encouraging us to pursue this "venture"... He called me last night and said he wants to take me to Key West, because he loved it there, but just wasn't with the right person. The way things are progressing with us, I think we would have fun anywhere we went! He is so funny, and such a great storyteller. He even has a blog at: www.movierightsforsale.blogspot - "I Should Write a Book". It's all kinds of stories about his childhood, and he mentions me in a few. (If you get a chance to check it out, click on an ad or two. He gets money for it if you do! TNX) We talk into the wee hours of the morning, and hate to say goodbye... I hope we can arrange our meeting really soon... He just has his divorce to finalize (which would be done pretty quickly, if his wife would stop holding it up!), and his kids to consider. (He has a 12 year old son, and a 14 year old daughter. I have a 7 year old son.)...
Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. I have heard that Scorpios and Cancers are a good match. I'm a Scorpio and his brother is actually a Cancer. He lost his "significant other" Mickey very suddenly as well, 6 months after my husband died. So he was hit doubly hard with two deaths. I wondered if somehow he and I were supposed to match up, after we both lost our loved ones. He is a bass player (the best my husband ever played with), so we also have music in common. It just didn't seem to happen for us. Steve came into my life again right after Mike's death, and has played such a big part in my healing, by listening to me and writing me, and sharing his pain and loss over the ending of his marriage.
I can understand how your husband would be intrigued by your mind! We Scorps are like that. That's why I feel this matching with Steve, A Sagittarius, is good for me. We laugh, and dream, and debate and flirt, and his intellect is a match for my own... He also has a light heart, which is quite different from my Aquarius husband!
It's interesting too how you and I had very similar experiences. Yours is just so much fresher a loss. Finding my husband was the single most horrifying thing I have ever experienced, and I hope it is the last of it's kind. I am just grateful that my son and I were not there to actually witness his passing. I am glad that you were spared that as well...
My husband also felt that he would not make it much past 50. His grandfather died at 54, and my husband was 53. He predicted correctly, but I was not prepared at all for his death. I kept thinking we had cheated it somehow, and the doctors never truly explained the high risk of another occurring.
As far as his mom goes... They used to fight like cats and dogs! No really, they were just constantly debating and disagreeing. He moved out of his house at a very young age. He said she still was his biggest ally in his family though. I'm sure he is with her now too, and Micky too...
I had my husband cremated, and have his ashes in a lovely hand carved wooden box. (He wasn't an urn kind of guy.) One day I may have to decide whether I will keep them with me, or release them somewhere he would like...
Hugs for you too...
ramonita last edited by
ramonita last edited by
Even though your life story contains a lot of pain because of your husbands death and leaving behind a young son, there is alot of beautiful sentiment in all your words, it is like i can actually see everything that happened to you. you are a good woman who believes in doing the right thing and the karma heading your way is going to be good. i also know what it is like to lose a soulmate, i lost my husband to death fiftheen years ago. i feel your pain, and also i would like to say to you follow that gut feeling it is never wrong, it doesnot matter, the distance, many have travel thousands of miles, to meet a person that they have fallen in love with, whom they have never seen in person. may the universe bless you with eternal good health and happiness.
I have been struck so many times by the goodness and warmth of people on this site. That is why I chose it to post my story. I knew I could reach many people with it, and also get feedback and insight from like-minded people who could understand my pain, my hope, and the wonderful magic that can happen, more than once in a lifetime apparently!
Thank you for your kind words, and your well wishes. I am encouraged as well by your belief that distance does not matter, and that my gut feeling is right.
May the universe bless you just the same. We are kindred spirits, and it is a comfort to know that there are others who understand my experience...
Peace and Joy,
I was going to reply earlier but my pc got disconnected LOL
I just found this thread again today
anyway I hope you and he will find a way to meet and spend some time together
about possibility of relationship
I can only say that if it's meant to be, you will be together
Thank you for your post. He told me he has a "master plan" in the works, so I trust that he is working on it! He has two children, 12 and 14, and they do need a little time to get used to him possibly being with someone other then their mother. (She is a very dysfunctional alcoholic, and their divorce is almost final.) My son is 7, and is looking for a man that he can look up to and emulate now. So I am not too concerned about him at this point.
We are constantly discovering correlations between our lives over the years, and so many similarities between us. Strange little coincidences that we know are not really coincidences... It feels like there is a greater force pushing us together, so we are very hopeful that it will all work out for us...