Gem's Deception,half truths starting to surface and now shutdown???Insight PLZ

  • I know he lied about a couple things. Why? I still have no idea he said he was hanging with a mutual friend for football, a couple weeks later I was out with that friend and he stated he hadn't seen him in over a year? WTheck? I don't own him, why did he lie? Stupid! His other half truths stupid too. I understand he has alot on his plate at the moment and I have backed away for him to have room to breathe and space to figure whatever circle of physco he is currently in, maybe he's mad over something I said or a reaction, who knows. Or maybe he is just overwhelmed.

    I'm using the space to figure out if I can live in his Gemini world. I have tried to remain the friend and do the things I do for all my friends when they have a sick family member. I guess I am boiling over the text that was never answered asking where to send flowers? How rude and strange at the same time. Why would you not want me to send flowers? Does anyone have any insight on what his issues are now? I have apologized for my wrongs, still waiting for his. I worry about him and his current situation and try to check in to make sure he is ok, if he needs anything. He thinks I want to have control over everything... is that it? I do those things because I care about him, he knows I do that kind of stuff for everyone. I wish we would have had an opportunity to talk and clear everything that transpired between us up, hurt feelings and all. Now it's stagnating and I don't know when an opportunity will arise with the restraints on his time. He does need to take care of what is at hand but, why do I get put on shut down? Is his heart in this at all? I have no idea, I am emotion, he is emotionless. It's hard to read a book with no print. Sorry to ramble, any insight is apprieciated. May all your tomorrow's hold rainbows, a gift of beauty after the rain.

  • Hey vintagemoon,

    Anyone on here will tell you that dating a Gemini man is anything but easy. I am a Gemini female, I may be able to help in how a Gemini thinks but when it comes to matters of the heart, I will forever say that male and female Geminis are night and day and that to really know a Gemini is to know their moon. If you can find out their moon sign all the better off you will be. It makes it that much easier to relate with them.

    First, before I ramble on, it would be helpful to know what your sun sign is? How long have you been seeing each other / dating?

  • Hey tmoe! Thanx for taking the time to read my ramblings....My Pop is a Gemini, I guess I'm a slow learner lol. Really all kidding aside,

    I do LOVE Gemini men,when focused on you, they are sensual. Not all over you, they like to mentally touch you ,first with wit and, charm- they observe you, making sure they ring all your bells and whistles,during their verbal seduction, you may think no, maybe say it. Then you relize it's you all over him-, answering questions no one else would dare ask and you would normally not answer.This is what blows me away. I have never been so comfortably out of control, We've been friends for 20 yrs, We both have a quick wit and tend to shut others out when together. Why he thought now would be a good time to pursue this I don't know. If he would have just layed out the situation I would have understood it. His aloof vaigness with me along complete lack of consideration-after a month of obsticles and hoops- In strolls the Midnight cowboy fsuper spirited - 2hrs late. Same kinda me crap the next time only he met my temper. He then introduced me to the biggest JA in the world...together.. we made sure to leave nothing standing, total destruction. Still some stinging and leariness for both of us and no chance to talk. I called after 10 days and apologized for my part..of the ugliness. He will listen and eventually accept his faults too, as long as emotions don't come into play.. then he shuts off or turns juvenile. Here's the nitty Gritty - I'm married. He knew my husband for a short time before we met. Gem and I grew closer over the years- I never let him know my true feelings. We have always flirted on the edge. Now after he gets me to commit and not look back,,, he says he has guilt cuz their friendship,? Its a litlle late now...Just BS We have been closer for years .I don't feel guilt, me the emotional one.My marriiage has been over for awhile, I grew tierd of blaming myself and fighting for it alone. When I called him(GEM) on the its not u its me BS it turned into WW3. Now it's solitary confinement from him, my punishment I guess. I have no idea where his mind is or heart. I have made excuses but I'm wondering now if it's ever going to be equal or just all about him. He can't find an hour to hash this out? I refuse to bend this time. He needs to bring something to give. I' don't get why I am like this with him. I give, he takes. I know he cares for me but WTH? His arrogance kills me. Maybe he is just overwhelmed and I may be mind+++++++ it.! What a great pair if we can ever leave our minds.

    With or without him there will be happiness....I would prefer with.----But I have to stay right w myself too

    UGH enough sorry----answers... I admit I have that in common with Gems-- I can't shut up! I really apprieciate your help and insight....I'm lost in the hot/cold, Anyone else I would have been long gone. Is he just lost in his head right now? When I leave is he going to flake again? I hope to leave w/o a straight jacket from here....;=+D! Included it all...just in case.

    him me

    sun- gemini sun- cancer

    rising-virgo rising-gemini

    moon-gemini moon-aries

    mercury-gemini mercury-cancer

    venus-taurus venus-leo

    mars- aries mars-cancer

    jupiter- capricorn jupiter-virgo

    saturn-capricorn saturn-aries

    uranus-leo uranus-virgo

    neptune-scorpio neptune-scorpio

    pluto-virgo pluto-virgo

    n node-virgo/s node-pisces n node aries/ s node libra

    5/26/60 7/16/68

    Our numerology sample was promising for compatibility if we can each give a little....

    Thanks for helping all of the Gemini lovers on here make some sense in a world that appears to be filled with nonsense and confusion

  • Hey Vintagemoon!

    Your story sounds very similar to many of the others on here, in that your Gem is a Jekyll and Hyde. That said, it does seem you have the openness and understanding about you to handle a Gem...though they are frustrating it seems you overcome well.

    Yes they have tendencies to do things that are excessively inconsiderate and they wont even think to apologize. Not that it is an excuse, but sometimes Gemini's can get so far into their heads that they can literally be oblivious of their actions and most importantly the emotions of others.

    One of the darker sides to Gemini is that they are always looking out for whats best for them. This comes off as selfish, especially when a Gemini acts on it (for example: a Gem having a "roving" eye), but really its just a quest to constantly better themselves, be it emotionally, physically, financially, etc. Something, I think, we should all strive for, but sadly, as stated before, Gems have a way of being so far in their heads that they could easily walk all over someone to get to another stage in their life and not realize their impact.

    In matters of the heart, Gemini's are easily detached from their emotions, their heart, and they love through their minds. Gemini's with water moons are at a benefit because a moon in a water sign balances out a Gem, making them able to love through their heart more and takes them out of their mind (makes them more open to being "touchy feely" and cuddly")

    In fact, my sister and I are a case example of a Gemini with a water moon and a Gemini without. I am more cuddly, I love hugs, a little PDA, and can be very affectionate (at times, haha). My sister on the other hand, is a bit of a miss touch-me-not. She wont initiate a hug, you have to steal one from her. My sister loves through her mind and doesn't realize that "grandma" might be a bit hurt when she just stands there and takes the hug instead of hugging back, or hugging with the same enthusiasm.

    Since the moon represents our emotions, how we love, your Gemini is going to be even more of a Jekyll and Hyde then others. Id imagine he can easily detach himself from situations and it takes him a bit longer to feel the guilt of his actions.

    Being logical with a Gemini is the best way to get your side heard. Like you said, being emotional doesn't help, it most certainly wont win a Gemini over....and though we love to talk, jumping from topic to topic, just grazing the surface is more our speed. In depth conversations are not fun for us.

    So, will he flake on you again...possibly, but one thing that always worked with me was when the issue of fairness was "thrown" in my face. For example, I would want x,y and z, but wasnt giving the same in return. When called out on it, I realized my error and though I didnt come right around and apologize, I did eventually and I fixed my habit. Sadly it is a process with Gemini's...I wish it weren't so.

    If you have truly given him time and space, and allowed him to think, then I say you should be telling him some of these things like:

    "He can't find an hour to hash this out? I refuse to bend this time. He needs to bring something to give. "

    I realize that the last time you called him out, in turned into WW3...that is the male side of the sign sigh. I still say confront and I still say you should continue to call him out, but you HAVE to do it in the most emotionless, calm manner... and its not easy to do being a frustrated and/or pissed off woman, lol. Emotions have a tendency to get the better of us....I know that ALL to well ; )

    Also, try checking this out:

    It goes into detail explaining decans, of which he has a first decan, and I believe you have a second. This site goes into explaining the differences between genders AND goes into great detail about decans which I have found to be excessively interesting and creepily "spot on".

    I apologize if I repeated things you already knew or if I didnt touch on certain aspects you are most curious about...normally I try to write in more detail, but I have a meeting to get should you need anything or have a random question or just feel like updating, please do.

    I wish you all the luck with your situation!

    • tmoe

  • Thanks Tmoe! Loved sight your right a little eerie how right on it can be. I am trying to figure out if I should make contact or wait. UGH if their were not so many good aspects of him I would bail.I'll let you know how all works out. Seems like I am signing up for a non refundable ticket to an amusement park exciting rollercoasters, fun shows and games along with plenty of spook houses on no set schedule. We'll see..

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