Thmilin !!!!

  • Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii....gosh we missed you girl.

    How are you?

  • Hahhaah, I was coming back on here trying to find the old threads and say hi but it looks like all my posts are gone? How do you see if someone's online ... you said you saw me online once but I have no idea how you do that!

    Happy new year Flowsco and friends! Sorry I was travelling when I was posting before and well was in multiple countries for a couple months. Now I'm back home in California and it's cold and miserable. 😛

    Hope you guys had a great holiday season across the world and a happy new year start ...

  • Happy New Year to you too. The only way to know if someone is online by the posts made at the moment that your online too when you check by "Show me latest discussions" I'll see if I can find the old post and link them here for you.

    We were worried that you loved it so much in Asia that you forgot all about Nah just kidding I am pleased that your okay and back in the cold indeed.

    Here the weather has been just one big mess ..snow, snow and more snow.

    Holiday season was great. Lot's happend. Going to see if I find the libra thread.

  • Here is the Libra thread if there any other you want that you can't find right away let me know I will see if I can find it. At the turn of the year the forum cleared all topics only the ones that you "saved" would still be in your account.

  • LOL, thanks Flowsco, I had finally found it and caught up on all the pages of you and LibrasLair... SO! He accepted your gift, went underground and left you hanging, then finally called you eh? And was all giddy and sounded excited to talk to you when he comes back ... good signs! Yay for you!

    I saw you wondering if this was a pattern, and yes, it is - 1) if we feel strongly about something (that it could turn out bad or we're nervous and want something very badly) we may avoid dealing with it for a very long time. it's just too much emotionally for us to process and we'll procrastinate til the bitter end, sometimes way past the "expiration date" and totally miss the boat on things. it's sad but true.

    1. we may have to work up to say/do/show things to people. again, by the time we do, it may be too late to matter. unfortunately I am pretty bad at gauging timing with people and will frequently have issues here where i come on too strong, then not at all, and always "miss" the right level reciprocated equally with the other person.

    2. we aren't good multi taskers. at least, i'm not. it can be emotionally draining to deal with multiple issues/people/things at once. if he had a lot going on at work or with family or friends, he may have been like "i am going to leave flowsco where i left it cuz i understand exactly where it's at and if i go deal with that it could change and be a big ball of yarn to work through and i have other balls of yarn to work through right now"

    yes, unfortunately, the more drama in our lives, sometimes the more we'll avoid/procrastinate with other things that need to get dealt with, in favor of dealing with things "in our face" that we can't escape. for example, i'm avoiding dealing with my taxes right now because at work i'm dealing with a bunch of drama and potential reorganization/layoffs that keep me on edge and require all my psychic energy to withstand and not break down or blow up at people. it's a cauldron in there. if i had a boy issue i would totally avoid it because i wouldn't be able to "afford" expending attention on that.

    messed up i know. if the boy were super aggressive it'd actually make me avoid him "harder" and then potentially decide i couldn't be with him because he isn't giving me "space." so this is why it's important to let the libra come to you sometimes. lame, i know.

  • Ugh. You don't miss a mark don't you?...LOL It's just like you are right here hidding somewhere and see it all.

    Yes, he has been hiding again. We have talked after he was abroad. He took on two new projects that should be finishing around these days. In between we spoke again and he mentioned very decisively that he does want to see me after this period. So I am happy and nervous at the same time but my Scorp is very up there now so I am keeping in control of things. I have been texting him off and on. And yes some of them have been

    And oh...not to forget something very important he said that I was stealing his heart. sighs

    I couldn't sleep last night (morning now for me) just because of the upcoming events. I understand the yarn theory. But if we are going to make this work he will have to stop with that habit sometime soon. I have patience but not that much either. 😉

    Besides I have been bugged by other guys in between. Even my cousin a Libra that is his best friend was kinda hitting on me. I think he was kinda snooping around for Libra guy jeezzz.

    I read the last post in this thread and described my situation to the teeth.

    I am soooo glad your back. 🙂

    • my Scorpio in me is up there.....

  • read it and replied! i missed you too 🙂 i kept thinking, i wonder if they think i abandoned them and will never come back ... hehe

    i was reading some other thread not about libras specifically on here that mentioned how libras really like to dip their toes in the water for a really long while before they decide they want to do it.

    i also agree with someone's post that libras have serious time management issues. we really do! i'm always doing 30 things at once and kind of awful at it. 😛

    i think it took me a long time to figure myself out there ... that with love for a libra i think it really has to start with a core of friendship, even if there's mad chemistry or sensuality between you. that you know and trust the person can be counted on and relied on and you show in each other's actions how you care, even if you don't make a big deal about it. it just is.

    like today, a friend of mine, we're totally platonic, totally grabbed food off my plate without asking. if someone else had done that i would have made a fuss but he's a good friend who is like family to me - and while it was arrogant of him to do, it at the same time made me feel a little "warm and fuzzy" because we have a close enough bond for me to permit that and for him to want to do it (he doesn't usually do that with people and if he wants something off a plate he always asks permission).

    it's moments like this that get into a libra's heart. just kind of "knowing" and feeling naturally certain all is right and you just go well together. like slyvie described ...

    if there's too much pressure or angst a libra is just going to balk or be all nervous and twitchy and uncertain and not "feel right." the only way they can fall in love - truly open their heart - is knowing it's "safe." and fully reciprocated.

  • I understand what your saying yet it's difficult when you don't see the person to "know" where their brains are. He accuse me of thinking to much but I don't have any choice if he keeps running all over the place. Yep timemanagement!!! So for the things I do know about I text and let him know that I am thinking about him etc. Like one of the projects he is/was doing was a concert with a A-list artist. I send him a text wishing him good luck with the kick off. Then with the other project treating an athlete so she can compete again. I read in the news that she is going to make the Olympics and i sent him a text congrating him on his good work. In that way I try to make him understand that I am there for him. I was going to surprise him at the concert then changed my mind and asked him if he would like me come and see him there then when I checked for tickets they were sold out. So I texted him that I won't be making it. lol

    He even discuss on of his kids with too funny but the kid is like me wanting him to sit quiet for a moment. So I do see progress it's just the not having actual time to get together that make me go argh!! So I keep myself busy.

    I must admit due to this up and down makes me also up and down and then I want to sting. I do try very very hard not too but it isn't easy. He still finds that I gave out mix messages yet I find when I get him infront of me we are going to sort those things out. I am not doing it over the phone or text.

    So this friend of yours....any potential??

  • Oh I have a additional question for you if you can help me out a bit. I had my chart drawn for me and I have Libra in Venus.

    I was wondering what effect that has on this whole situation. As far I could of pulled his chart (if correct) he has Scorpio in Venus.

  • i know about the stinging - my venus is scorpio. esp in love i want to sting when i'm hurt ...

    that is RICH he told you you're thinking too much! he's projecting. he's totally thinking too much which is part of what's making him hard to "sit still" with. snort what a dude thing to say to a woman! ha!

    i don't know how to put this next bit ... but two more things:

    libras can stay superficial with you for a VERY long time. it feels superficial to you like you are barely past acquaintances but for them it takes a long time to go deeper and deeper and they do it immensely gradually until suddenly one day you look around and you realize you're together and it's a done deal. along the way you're like, this isn't moving fast enough, and how serious is he/she, and he did this or that and gave me this mixed signal but if you keep going with it, and going with it, and going with it, and going with it ... yes, and going with it ...

    we can take FOREVER. i'm not saying we always do, but we simply can, for various uniquely personal reasons (past traumas, your life is not ready to accept the shakeup, you're not ready for commitment just yet, etc.)

    what i have found too is if we see the other person isn't settled in for that endless, slow motion ride, we totally lose interest. we have to be serious about it, see, and then if we see that other person isn't going to baby step with us then we're like, okay then this isn't a good fit. if the person pressures us too hard or if the person is too hands off.

    obnoxious, i know, but remember - BALANCE!

    ok, second thing... i forgot for a second what i was gonna say, lol. oh, yes - libras are used to being the ones who notice all the little things and do the special little overtures. i dunno if libra women do it more than men but i will say that when friends have done special little things for me i am pleased and surprised and then i move on. we get our high off of finding the perfect gift/pleasing item for someone and giving it. we do not get our high off of getting those gifts in quite the same way. i am not saying if a man showed up with a sling of diamonds for my neck i wouldn't be thrilled but we are more impressed with you kind of knowing or remembering something versus doing something about it.

    so to break it down - very good that you did NOT go to that concert. also, never invite yourself or try to surprise a libra in that way unless you are exceptionally close. libras are the host/hostess, the ringmaster, the master magician. you don't want to throw them off/unbalance them. you do that by introducing drama, high expectations without reasonable basis, or startling them in a place of "safety."

    showing up at their work unexpected - i'm remembering the two of you in the beginning and the whole weirdness at his job - it can throw someone off in a good way if it's at least vaguely related - you had a real reason to go to his job and he happened to be there and he knows you're there for him but also to do something else. and that's where you met him, doing your thing.

    but flying somewhere to surprise him uninvited - big nono. let him invite you first, let him tentatively, very very very very slowly make an overture here, an overture there.

    here's a tidbit - friends have told me that it took them a really really long time to get to know me, and that the person they know and are close to now is nothing like the person they first met.

    it's not so much that i changed (though of course i have, we all do over time) but that i was very "social butterfly" in their mind and hard to get to know because I was "all over the place."

    what they did not know is that is a facade. i am all over the place because that requires very little emotional energy. settling down requires giving a lot of energy. i only want to settle down when it is safe and i know i am going to potentially get an investment on my "return."

    it is not that i am "superficial" it is that i do not start deep, meaningful relationships with anyone, everyone, at any time. i am extremely selective - balance. i have to keep weighing the person - for YEARS. it takes a couple of years for me to say, okay, this person is legit, and can be trusted with knowing what i am really like when most vulnerable.

    for my friends, it comes out in different ways. they will notice i tell them more and more information about myself. they will learn 2 years in that i did x or y that they never knew about, something pretty meaningful or shocking. i will do more things with them than i use to. they will know more what i like or don't like, because i actually feel comfortable telling them, when before i was always "oh whatever" about everything as if i didn't care. my very very closest friends - i'll gossip and i'll burp and talk about totally inappropriate things in front of them and with them. it literally takes me 2 years minimum to work up to that.

    it's not that I am "testing" the person it's just that i have to feel "right." the more "right" i feel, the more i share. and it can take a crazy long time.

  • hahah, other than our gender, he and i have the same venus in scorpio, that is funny. i don't personally know what it is to have libra in venus, however ... i will say that the latter simply magnifies libra's best love tendencies because venus is libra's ruler, period.

    going off that alone i'd say a guy who falls in love/lust with you is serious because a libra in venus is like being aphrodite in the half shell on olympus with her best gown on, naked, oozing romance, love, and beauty. totally irresistible. 🙂

    obviously, this is real life, and he may have issues, and you both have other planets in other areas of your chart.

    but libra in venus is like you're super romantic, terribly sensual, a giving, loving partner (in bed, and more), your graceful, womanly, the embodiment of "desire." like to be "looked after" and coddled a bit (worshipped a little) need to be romanced and flattered and wooed. you can potentially fall in love with love too easily and sometimes become "blinded" by the romance and not awake to "real life."

    scorpio in venus ... is like who you are, as a scorpio, is that person's "love personality." that's how they love.

    for me, as a scorpio in venus - my love is all or nothing. there is no in between. and if i'm jilted or cheated in love, you are dead to me and i hate you with the heat of a 1000 suns. i may obsess, not just fantasize, but obsess, over people, and it can get unhealthy. i can be very possessive, and jealous, and suspicious. i want to give my 100% to someone, and h ave him give his 100%. honestly, this kind of love is probably more like a master/slave relationship in modern BDSM terms, because that's the kind of intensity it can get to. it might not always be healthy, esp depending on where someone's other planets are. sometimes i think of scorpio not just as the scorpion but as like, a brash, macho, virile, war general. someone like aries but far more possessive and really emotionally demanding and invasive. someone who wants to get all up inside of you and totally CONNECT. like a plug in a socket. get stuck together and never get unstuck.

    i find this interesting, because your guy's behavior doesn't demonstrate this just yet. however, if he's got a complex, he could be hiding it. because, frankly, i know how i can be, which makes me overcompensate. in so doing, i can work very hard to make a person NOT realize how badly i want them because i don't want to scare them away or even more simply, don't want them to "have my number." i'd rather be alone and have them think i'm glamorously dating around and metropolitan and active and with an active social life, than realize how deep dark scary i can be as a lover/partner. 😜

  • the guy and is it going anywhere - you mean the dude who ate food off my plate? he could be gay (there are lots of rumors) or he could be straight. if he's straight there are some things about him that make it a no-deal. it's weird to explain, but i'm not sexually, physically, or emotionally attracted to him. i am occasionally intellectually attracted to him.

    so we're truly platonic and i don't ever want it to go anywhere because if it did it would ruin everything and we'd probably not be friends any more.

  • First of all I once more want to say I do appreciate you doing this.

    Oh man. Unaware to all you just wrote I had this impression about him already.

    Why is that men like to project like that? D*amn.

    I am not sure about the barely past acquaintances stage between us. He tries to trigger me every occasion he gets. By being explicit or saying things to see if he could get a jealous reaction out of me. And I am not biting. I wonder what he will do when I start telling him what really goes on here. With that I mean the guys that have approached me the last few weeks. An ex boyfriend, ex co-worker, a carpenter and not to forget my cousin (his best friend).

    I am in no hurry just want to know if my invested time is worth the hassle and what exactly he wants. Because he isn’t saying that with words only tries to mess with my head about the bedroom department. Lol. He forgets that I can play that game better than him. I sent him a text saying that great minds think alike and I was wondering if dirty minds do too. LOL

    No response!!! LOL Believe me when he has me on the phone and I am talking about something else he starts on the subject and then I freeze. :0

    You see this projecting thing I know too well. And now you laid it out like this I do see a lot of that going on. He tries to decipher me from a distance yet unable because I haven’t shown him the true me. He needs to spend time with me to know more. And I have told him that I do want to see him but he has to set a date for US time. And then I would know what the deal is. He sometimes finds my slow movement a tad annoying. Oh well. Yet is funny that you mention the slow pace yet is seems not to apply to him fully. I have slowed him down in the beginning until I was ready to tell him where my heart was at that moment and on return he shoves his work in that slows thing down yet on the phone he pretends that things should speed up. Hmmm How can someone trust this rhythm? And so I responded kind of aloof and that wasn’t appreciated. Yet at the end he says that I am stealing his heart.

    About the concert. He did invite me to come and see him sometime. That is when we just met so it would have been like cashing in for that invitation. Besides if I was going I would be in the crowd enjoying the show not trying to get backstage to see him. I am like that so I hope he can live with me being as social as he is.

    About the sudden realising that we are together. I might have mentioned this before but I find that we entered this “relationship” a while back. With that I mean we already argued, disagreed on things, shared more than expected and been a comfort for each other on certain occasion. You see we both said that words are nothing and all that has been said has to be shown. I did in my way. And I am waiting for his.

    It’s going to be hard to let him be the ringmaster all the time. I am a take charge kind of woman. I hope we can find that balance in that otherwise we will have a problem.

    I am not a drama person. Thank goodness. I told my cousin when he called me to investigate if I had a man in my life that any person that gives me a headache I run them!!! I like living my life peacefully and have fun. I did the drama thing a few years ago and that is enough for me in this life time.

    About your tidbit. I had to smile when I read that. We did discuss that once after I mentioned the fact to him that I want to get to know him better as a person. He said oh to do that you need a lifetime to know me. I said I wasn’t planning to go anywhere you? And we both laughed.

  • Uh oh about Venus in signs. Wow.

    I like my description and yes I am like that. And that’s why I very careful with whom I get serious with. Thing is some of them doesn’t know what to do with me when I am interested. LMAO.

    Seriously they don’t! I mentioned this to Libra guy and he seems up for the challenge...well that is what he let me to know. big grin

    Gosh. I ran from a full blown Scorpio and might ending up with a Scorpio in disguise. I hope he is different really. Or I might be walking again. His b-day is on the 19th of October.

    Super big smile about you not wanting to get unstuck. Yet I do hear you loud and clear. It’s something we all are looking for in life. And with this guy I have a deep connection and that I felt months ago. You see every time I have been to that health club my whole body is totally wired like I stood in a pool of water and a electric cord touched it and gave me a heavy buzz.

    I always had to be on my phone calling anybody to unload and get myself together before entering the building. Because I know if I don’t do that he would pick up on it easy.

    Sound we are all alike. YIKES

  • Yes I did mean that guy/friend. And I understand what your saying.

  • Okay I am tired and I see a lot of typo's in my messages. I am out. Will be back later.

  • I can do both of your spiritual paths thmilin if you send me name, date, time and place on both in an e-mail. I can pdf it back to you. So I don't have time at the moment to write much cause I am fighting a virus that keeps popping in to get me to buy the security crap. write to me sherrieleec48 at either the hot place or the other. Glad your back again we were just talking about you and wondering. So ya hoooooo your back.

  • hey ladies, now that i'm back home the day hours are spent at work and I can't log in during the day to post -

    Flowsco it had been a while since I'd been going through the details of your story but yes, your Libra does seem a bit different and again things are based on the planetary positions so my thoughts are just possibilities that could totally be wrong in some cases!

    Projecting is something I know I do - I think sometimes as "people pleasers" and our fear of being hurt and our weighing our options, we can "feel someone out" by projecting what we THINK they want/think/feel but it's really our own assumption. Then the person is supposed to say yes/no that's how I feel and then you keep narrowing things down from there until you feel you "get" the person.

    Esp if you haven't shared too much of yourself he'll do that a lot and he may even punish you for withholding too much of yourself. I think we talked about this already - plus if he's Venus in Scorpio he will def punish you for perceived "slights." It's basically his way of showing vulnerability but of course it doesn't feel good for either of you.

    Like I said unfortunately there's a lot of give/take, push/pull and trying to read other's signals. It just makes it that much harder you're long distance, aren't you? Or he is always away, to some degree, it sounds like and it's hard to see each other often.

    Good that he invited you to the concert - note that even if someone says "come see me any time" that's still not an open invite to really come see them any time. It can be unbalancing for a Libra, they'd still want you to ask if it was okay for them if you came for something specific versus having you "surprise" them without any warning. His response would probably be "oh, cool, yay, yes, let's meet up thank you for coming to see me!" but he'd still want you to check and ask before doing that.

    showing up is very aggressive. if that's what you're going for then ... have at it!!

  • LibrasLair, heeey! Aw, thank you for the offer - do you mean a spiritual path with me and my platonoic friend? I don't need to know that actually, I know exactly where he stands and where he'll stay in my life, lol, no open concerns for me there. I don't want it to become anything and in fact when some friends tried to get me to think he was interested in me I got really weirded out and started to avoid him.

    He is just NOT the type of person I can love romantically. A good friend, like a brother, yes. Even if he suddenly developed emotional intelligence, strong sensitivity and empathy for others, and matched me in every other way - I am not physically attracted to him. 😞

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