Did I make the right decision??



  • I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. I have been in a relationship for 12 yrs. I have one child with him. Lately I feel a one sided relationship. I spent New Years alone while he was suppose to be back with the bubbly. He finally did return at 2 am and fell asleep. I just told him I dont want to be with him anymore. He is very stubborn and never has anything to say to me except that he feels I ask him to many questions. And why should he stay home we dont do anything. So he would rather spend time with someone else elsewhere. I am not stupid but I am full of hope that he will one day do and say the right thing. I think there is someone else he says no. Can anyone help me have I made a mistake or should I stay??



  • Hi jjgurl, I am so sorry to hear that, but to be honest I can understand what ur going through(lets not get into details with mine).. But if you feel like his not giving to the attention that you deserve and need, but rather spend his time elsewhere!. Remember sweetie, you cannot make any1 change they have to change for themselves.. If you have been with him this long and he has not change, Do you think he wants to or ready to change? Sometimes men feel like, because their with someone this long and especially when you have kids together that they can do what they want because your not going to leave him.. Just think! right now you only have 1 child with him and his doing this, can you imagine what it would be like if you have more kids with him.. I know how hard it is especially when you two have kids together because the child's happiness means more, but you deserve to be happy! We all deserve to be happy, we only have 1 chance to live our life the way we want and what make us happy.. I know part of u is really hoping that his going to change, But mami how long do wait? Trust me I truely I understand.. Do what makes you happy! DO NOT PUT YOUR LIFE AND HAPPINESS ON HOLD! YOU WILL REGRET IT.



  • I think MsScorpio is so right. Do not put your life and happiness on hold, you will regret it. I can't believe that he thinks it's ok to return home at 2am and not ask questions! He is unbelievably selfish. He doesn't deserve you. I'm sorry but I think you should move on in your life and move forward. Take care of yourself and child. This doesn't sound to be a healthy relationship, there is no give and take. Move forward Jigurlz. I hope you have friends and family to support you and get out of this rut. Better things are out there and a far happier life. It will pass, life will be so much better for you.

    Peace, happiness and new love for you.

    Intrigued.



  • Hi jjgurl, I am really truely sorry that your are going through this, but you learn from your mistake and it would only make you stronger!.. Also remember that GOD is not going to put you through anything if he knows you cannot handle it.. You are a very strong woman, and stronger and powerful that you think.. So don't feel bad if you feel it in your heart then do what you need to do! If he is not the man for you, someone else is waiting for you out there. We can only hope, But we cannot wait forever hoping that 1 day they will change. His lost is another man's gain!. Sometimes people don't realize thay they have something really GOOD until is gone and by then it's too late!.. Sometimes things are better burried because do you really wan't him to tell you the truth? I know you wanna know, but sometimes it's better and easier not knowing! A man would never tell you because they wanna have their cake and eat it too. You know yourself better than anybody! only you can decide for yourself, I can only understand how u feel but I cannot feel what is in your heart... Good luck mami..



  • Thank you guys sooo much!! I do feel better today. I laid down the law and told him this is it. He took it alright and is not fighting me on it. I feel alot better I thought I would be devistated but I am not. You are right I have to think of my daughter this is the best move I have made in a while.



  • Good to hear you were feeling better on Tuesday jigurlz. If you weren't devastated, then in your heart you know you're doing the right thing. Trust your gut instinct. Good luck! Life can only get better.

    Intrigued.



  • I am very happy that you feel better! And I'm glad that we was able to somewhat give you advice!. We all learn from our mistakes and the experience that we go through just make us stronger. Stay strong for you and your daughter, you are her role model and it's in our best interest to to always set good examples for our kids so they can avoid the mistakes that we have made... Good Luck to you and your babygirl.. Ms intrigued is so right! LIFE WILL AND CAN ONLY GET BETTER..