Hans wolfgang, in need of your insight please



  • My company is plannning to move to another city approximately 3000miles away.

    The company had some major financial difficulties in the past six months. Although they promised that everything would be fine now, i am still in doubt.

    I am in my late fourties, divorced with children ranging from 18 to their early twenties. I moved to current location to start a new life after divorce. All three children in the same city, two of them living with me. I'm also have a guy in my life of which i think we have a future.

    I am sitting between the sky and the deep blue ocean. Stay and maybe be happy with the man in my life, children and also family that's close by.

    Move to a totally new area, with no friends, no family plus without my children.

    My employer expects an answer soon and i have no idea what to do. What would your advise be...?



  • I am not Hans but I do think that I may be able to shed some light onto this subject.

    We so often forget to stop for a moment and think about what's really important to us, we have become more and more preoccupied by what the world thinks we should be doing instead of what our heart tells us we should be doing. No one can tell you what to do except for you, you are the one who has to make the final desicision. Just remember what is important to you, what you feel inside and where your going to feel whole.

    Family, Love, Friends and Happiness is a necessity in life and even if things didn't work out between you and the man in your life is it really worth risking who you are to move away? This company I assume has merged with another, when this happens it take some time for them to get on their feet, to reastablish and become more cost effective. They will have their ups and downs just like the rest of the world. Are they willing to give you a contract? Are they willing to put in writing that they will be fine and not go under? These are all questions that you need to ponder on.

    The most important thing now is to stop being preoccupied ( work is not a substitue for family and happiness ). If you can live comfortably without making this move I would recommend that you stay right where you are. Slow down a little and find the beauty in life, the beauty thats always been there but has gone unnoticed due to preoccupations. Your words " Stay and maybe be happy" really got to me. What do you mean maybe? I hope that your not speaking of the man in your life. Please know that your worth much more than you give yourself credit for and you are the only one that can make you happy. Never depend on someone else to preform this task, happiness comes from within, with a little work I know that you can find your happiness. To do this, as I mentioned before, slow down and enjoy life and what I mean about enjoy life does not have to do with anything materialistic. Enjoy the love and the beauty around you and your happiness will come.

    I hope that I was able to help a little. Good luck in whatever you chose to do.

    With love and blessings

    Muffie



  • Hey Alisa922, thanks for replying. I think i haven't express myself well. Fact is, i am happy. And no, its not a fact of company being merged. They had problems due to bad decisions. I do enjoy my work a lot, and i know they are depending on me, as its not going to be so easy finding a replacement. (In finance) been with the company for almost three years.

    I really don't want to move. I have no desire to, and feel that i am being forced to make a decision which is going to change my life enormously.

    As for the man, we have discussed it before it became clear that the company is indeed going to move. He is not a direct person, replied by saying that he really hopes company is not going to move. If i do go, i will always wondering whether it could have worked out. On the other hand, the people from my office being like family to me. I feel totally torn and to not know which way to turn. Been thinking and thinking in circles.