Can there ever be a successful relationship with a gemini man?
yea you seem right mizzlibras, but jen is sad, she has been waiting for the chance to be with him, she said she has loved him since she was 11 years old, because is the only guy that knows everything about her, and because she doesnt let ANYBODY else "know" her, i think that he is her last hope and if it doesnt work out with him?? then she is scr-ew-ed (i actually said that to her face lol) she has made her decision, and i have made mine, AND also jen said that she wants to keep in contact with the sag girl( i actually took her with me when i talked to jen also) and if sag girl wants to still talk to her?? then i dont care if she does, cause i deleted jens phone number this time, so im done, jenn will realize what she lost sooner or later, if jen and him ever get together in the next couple years, I BET she will end up pregnant by him (he already has two kids at age 23, so he isnt doing something right lol) but if that is supposed to happen to her oh well i guess its her life,
i dunno if i ever told you but i always had daydreams and mental images of me and her not working anyways, and i always pictured her somehow meeting me again years down the road, after ive had "experience" she said that back in December when she talked to sag girl about me, that i dont have 'experience" in a Relationship and that i dont know how to talk to girls, lol i talk just fine with girls but im a SAG so that makes me very blunt,honest and to the point haha
so i actually typed her a letter after i thought about everything and i went to her house and put it in her mailbox about a week ago now, i typed a dman good letter lol and i pretty much said that i would wanna be friends rather than nothing at all. and that she told me the whole time that she didnt want anything more with me, its just that i refused to believe it(and i did, i ignored everyones things they said) should i actually post up what i said to her? hmmm well if you read this tell me what you think, and have you heard anything from gem man??
I know that you are mad at me and you have every reason to be. If you could put yourself in my shoes for a second and maybe try to understand why I acted that way and said stupid things would help. You all of a sudden being in a Relationship did make me mad/jealous and a little hurt. But I was angry when we talked last and I should have waited until I calmed down completely and thought about everything, just like I have now. I know that I was wrong for posting that bulletin but I was mad and everyone says or does things when they are mad that they regret later.
This letter I typed for you because I don’t want to be blocked out of your life anymore I have already been away far too long the past 2 months. I had to figure things out on my own for a while and I did but your Relationship thing threw me for a loop and I’m sorry, but I don’t regret it. I needed some answers and now I got them so I’m good but that still doesn’t take away the way I acted and the thing I posted on Myspace. I would rather be your friend than nothing at all. You say that I don’t know you that well even though we do have ALOT in common so I feel like that I already know a lot about you. But You are right because you have yet to even see the “real” me either. Now I know where I stand and I have accepted it. Do I want something more? Yes, but I will be there for you as your friend unless you were too decide otherwise. I cant help but feel that you were kind of hurt about how I “disappeared” for the last 2 months and if I wasn’t around when I could have helped you in some way? Then I’m sorry for that as well cause I wanted to be there. I’m sure all your friends come to you for a lot of things I just wish you could come to me with something that is bothering you. I know that you want to be super independent just like me and want to handle everything on your own, but everyone could use some help, encouragement or advice on things sometimes.
I’m sorry for saying that you were “obsessed” with him. I understand why you love him and have for a very long time but I have to say that I think your in love with a fantasy and not Reality. How do I know this? Because I too have a story just like it. This girl Ashley I’ve known since I was very young, I was the ring bearer and she was the flower girl at my oldest brothers wedding 14 years ago. For the longest time I was in love with her but we were just friends. There came a time where I realized that me and her would have never worked because we are too different. She likes to go out to the clubs all the time and get drunk and hook up with random guys. And I have heard that she has cheated a lot of times also. So there is no way I’d be with her if she asked cause the risk is too great to get hurt. But Now she is in a good Relationship with a good guy it seems like and I think they moved in together now so I’m happy for her. Would I be with her if she ever asked me? In the past Oh yeah I couldn’t have said no. But now? No I wouldn’t do anything. Now I’m not saying this to make you mad or get you to change your mind about him. I was just telling you my story that is similar and that I ended up hurt from it. He does sound like a good guy when we had our little chat, and he responded to what I said a lot better than I thought. He said he respected me and that I seem like a very real person for saying what I said about me just wanting you to be happy even if it isn’t with me.
I also wanted to point out that I should have no reason to be mad at you and I’m not. You gave me all the hints that you just wanted to be friends and then maybe in a few years or whatever we could be more. And now I realize what I was doing to you and to everybody else that told me to leave you alone and to move on. I would listen and hear everything you and everyone else said But I didn’t want to believe it because I thought I knew better, because I feel something for you that is kind of hard to ignore, sometimes I can think that I “know it all” when I actually don’t, but I do know a lot for my lack of experience in life or with women. I could go into details about some things but I’m not going to do it in a letter. I have had quite a few girls show me interest before but I wasn’t interested in them the same way until I met you that is. It is very hard for me to let someone get close to me(much like you).
You might wonder why I have a hard time letting people close to me when I have never had a relationship before right? Well, my bad past plays a big part in it that’s for sure. But also In 7th grade I found out that this girl Tahnee liked me a lot from one of my friends that knew her, into 8th grade we talked here and there but we both super shy and both a lot alike, sometime in 10th grade I heard my friend say that she died in a car accident over the summer from switching from 8th grade to 9th grade. So it was over a year later when I found out cause nobody wanted to tell me and I always wondered why I didn’t see her around. Needless to say that it destroyed me for quite a while and then I didn’t let myself get caught up with anybody.
And so Jennifer if you have read this letter and you are ready to be my friend, to talk and to have fun. I would love it if you would give me a call on my cell phone rather than sending me a message on Myspace (if you are ready to forgive me). Thank you for your time and I hope to hear from you.
Sincerely, Cody """
pretty good huh? loland yes it all true
LMAO@ her ex agreeing with you and having a normal conversation, it goes to show he properly agrees with you fact. its nice you explan your self to her, and I cant help you only gave her that letter, to secretly have her in your arms, thats my opinion or if your honest about it and had closure that you know nothing will happen then thats good, but honestly if i liked a guy like that i wouldnt even talk to him if he didnt want me, me being his friend would make it worse cos I'd always want more and i'd be the only one feeling the attraction. it was a good enough letter dont get me wrong, hopfuly she has the heart to forgive you, you didnt have to lash at her like that. as much as you was sooo angry I understand and she should know it was happing and should have been very blunt and told you nicely. its sad about the girl in 7th grade, its also good you let her go and let it be, its hard to forget but its important to let go and have your life back together.
I and gem-guy of course I heard from him, crazy guy lol, no honestly he is crazy first of all I was talking to his friend on msn, and he told me to join the chat room, that we all take in the forms theres a chat room so i joined in, ironicly I and gem were on at the same time....raises a brow yup so what happend was his friend was like oh honey where are you, where are you and then gem was like oh s-h-i-t honey is on, another member was like oh honey where have you been all this time woman, i was like hey monkey baybay ive been around just busy, gem was like dont call her woman im her prince i have her back ...i got my white horse. then monkey obviously confused shes a friend of mines but i havent talked to her in long, so she was like whats wrong if i call her my woman, and he was like dont say anything bad to her i have her bacl ok...yaada yaada being a total jerk secretly dont know what he was playing at. then afterwards he was like honey do you still have love for me, all that I kept ignoring him, thought he was a fool. so then he turned around and bring on his jerk on, was pretty rude to me which annoyed me, but i kept ignoring him. then afterwards insults came, he kept pairing me up with this other member girl who he found annoying. and went with the insults, he kept mentioning me, I kept ignoring lol. then afterwards his friend and this other female member were discussing facebook, and the girl said to his friend oh u rejected m i joked and said that he rejected me to, then gem-guys friend said to me oh honey what happend to you and gem-guy again on facebook, i want to know let me hear about it, we want to know, I kept ignoring i couldnt believe it i kinda got sooo shy to even type, after the friend didnt let it go i was ignoring them both, felt pissed of and weirded out, gem-guy was like say what ever im real tell them what happend..... he pissed me off argh s-h-i-t bag, then his friend was like oh see what u did gem she is all quite u made her all quite now, and he was like trust me its a good thing. I still didnt reply and left the chat room, later when i loged out gem checked my page, you can see when someone has viewed ur page, dont know what he wanted honestly, but when we were talking he never usually checked my page, it isnt his thing, but i wonder what he wanted to do and what he wanted to say.
now again i spoke to his friend a week later, wanted to know and see if he was bringing it up again, so i he made the first move, we kinda chated on call on msn, he was like ive been thinking of you and if we meet would we kiss, i was like dude my mind is pretty masculine, and lets cut the sweet talk, let me correct you. you want to have s-e-x cos you havent got laid in awhile and no i wont kiss you when i see you, I have a feeling he goes back and forth with me and gem and tells what one says to each other.so again ironicly i and gem were on chat at the same time, there was an argument hitting on the chat room after the forms everyone saying he used to be humble how he wanted a girl to settle down and get married and he never kissed a-s-s his friend, they were at him again, and he did the same back as usual i was quite, then when they said oh remember u wanted a wife and to get married he was like yeah I asked honey that question, obviously later he was insulting me, then he obviously gave me a huger hint, and he was like oh these b-i-t-ches need to be thrown in ws10 which ws10 is my area adress, he is a jerk yet again, i left the chatroom after that.
( btw his friend made him change i know its sooo obvious.wheres b4 it was easy to talk to him we were on the same page at time same values and at times same opinions. its really sad, plus the fact he keeps mentioning me and is angry at me for some certain reason which is weird, like he ended it with me at first, and he was being a jerk like always, I pretty much hate him and like him still, but his way to insensitive with my feelings why couldnt he respect me and leave our personal issues out of the way, and not discuss it on the site, that has made it a harder thing to want to even talk to him now, cos we first talked he said he would keep it to him self he isnt like that, but he is now, so it goes to show he has changed, i also dont like that if he is gona share it with everyone couldnt it be with a person who was nicer his friend is also insensetive, like i said they share stuff. last time his friend out of the blue, lash out at me and said hey i dont know what happend with u and gem or if anything happend but its between u and him, i was kinda shocked and said erm i never mention anything but ok. gem is sooo immature i dont know what happend to him, and i dont know what he is playing at but he has lost the plot, my friend said he is really either angry with me ( which i didnt do anything to him as you know) then she said he either is in love with me. I dont think its either of them but she said im saying that cos its me that this isusse is happing to,my other friend said its obessvie lol.
I'm angry with him cos, now I dont trust him anymore, I feel uncomfortable with him. if he respected me then all this wouldnt be happing maybe its a cry out saying he was wrong but does it matter, he steped over the line. I dont miss him anymore, I still like him but I have to hate him you cant have someone treat you like this.
wow about you and the gem guy, geez, you have every right to be mad at him that whole thing was uncalled for :(. but the way you feel about him right now is probably the way Jenn is feeling about me right now cause after the letter she hasnt contacted me but she did send the Sag girl a text message saying " tell cody to not put letters in my mailbox, we are not gonna be friends and im done with him"
so there you have it, that letter was my last attempt to just be her friend im not doing anything with her anymore, BUT I GOT OTHER NEWS
that sag girl (ive known her for like 3 years but only really talked to her when i was talking to jenn) and i kinda became her best friend we text all day everyday and have alot of fun and we actaully have alot in common, (i always said that she was kinda like jenn) but unlike how jenn was, the sag girl Kirstin, well is a sag like me lol so she really talkative and i can be myself around her even more than i could with jenn, there has always been awkward moments between us since we been talking over the past few months and she has gone threw some stuff that i was there for her and her family all likes me of course, her mom and stepdad are friends with my sister and her boyfriend among other older people that all know eachother, i have always thought she was cute and the more i found out about her the more i liked her, and yes we had "the talk" last night
the past few days she has been saying things like "all guys just see me just as a piece of a-s-s and dont see me for me" and of course i say " well im sorry they do that, they just dont see you like i do i guess" and then i get the message a little bit later saying, "correct me if im wrong and please do but it does seem like you have or have had an interest in me? and then i say " ok well im not gonna lie to you, i have always thought you were cute but over the years i was like whatever, but since these few months and talking all the time, i can say that yes i do have an interest in you(i hope i didnt make it weird)" she said "no you didnt, im acutally taking it better than i thought, but i kinda caught on before that you might have an interest in me" i didnt respond for like 30 min cause i was playing a video game and i get another text saying " so why havent you ever told me that you had an interest in me? sorry i hate to dwell but now im getting really curious lol"
and so we talked like until 5 in the morning and she said that she always wished someone would do the things that i did for jenn for her called me a sweet guy etc... and she couldnt sleep cause she "had things on her mind now" lol and i said "i could have said more to you but nope my lips are sealed think on that one! lol" and she says "wtf cody! tell me everything i didnt know there could be more.... so will you tell me please?" i said "lol even if i did you wouldnt believe anything i said" and she said "ill believe you i promise.... just dont shock me too much lol pwetty pwease :)" god im such a sucker for that baby crap lol we talked some more and i asked her "well what do you think about all this? do you kinda like me more than a friend?" and she said " as of right now i dont know how you answer, its crossed my mind but i wasnt gonna jump out there and say that i do" "oh crap i just jumped out and said it f-u-ck! lol and we went on talking about how my sister and her mom been saying to both of us "why dont you guys just date eachother already? you talk all day everyday! geez"
so as of today(since the ice has been broken) we still talking just like the same but a little different of course lol flirting back and forth, her sister said she looked like crap today, and of course i said "no you dont :)" she says "stop being a kiss ass lol JK" (when you know thats what she wanted to hear or otherwise why text it to me?) well i dunno what to think its still early but we are good friends and she does trust me, we shall see what happens
Awwwwwww at least something good came out of it, atleast this one wouldnt be so difficult both on the same page, you know she is a good one with out any confusions of what she wants not complicated, you'll enjoy this relationship, I believe it would be good, remember go with the flow but also show you want more with sag girl that if you do want more, and see how up front she was she likes to be loved and she wouldnt push you away. I never knew you and sag girl had all these connections what took you so long into starting something was you shy? lol whose hotter jen or sag girl? I know you shouldnt be comparing and you properly expected a dude to ask you lol. like is there more of a closer bond and s-e-xual attraction with sag girl, then you had with jen?
gem-guy hmmm yeah he is mean, I dont know why he did that, well after he did check my page I checked his to, and then he went back and checked my page, this is supper immature, oh i was in the chat room yesterday and him and his friend were at it again with the insults i know it was meant for a joke no harm into it, but i found it annoying how can you go on with 10 mins top flying with your so called funny jokes, instead of arguing back i acted apart of the joke and every now and then i left it, people in the chat room were saying why you arent you not saying anything, well for starters im not into cyber bullying or arguments over the net with the most nonsense immature behaviour i rather dare them talk like that in front of them, i wouldnt hold back hiting them or making them feel so low and insecure.
well I'm still single I've yet to find another guy anywhere actually havent found one on the streets, in malls, nowhere not even the net, I talk to cancer man every now and then but I find him utterly boring lol. I dont know if I want a relationship but if a good guy comes along I wouldnt turn him away.
well me and sag girl havent really done anything about actually dating lol, we text all day like non stop (both being sags boy can we talk haha) and alot of times when i dont text back after an hour, i get a text saying "did you die?" like she misses talking to me and i even said that to her and she said " well i like how you entertain me geez lol " and also today she wanted me to listen to a song called "i love this pain" so i checked it out and it was about a guy that likes a girl that is wrong for him but the guy keeps going back and getting hurt, sound familar? (me and jenn) and then i wondered as to why she wanted me to check out that song, hmmmm then i said "what? you dont think im over jenn? cause im done, i wanted friends, but now not anymore" and she said, "well idk its up to you if you are or not" and i said "nope"
as of tonight since its friday, i hang out with her at her parents house quite a bit and we smoke hookah, and just talk, talk about these other guys that talk to her and she would ask me for advice, BUT this will be the first time we have hung out in person since we found out everything so i dunno how its gonna be, yeah im nervous haha but i mean its not anything out of the normal really but a little different now, im sure she will bring it up first lol and so ill just have to be honest.
and about the differences with jenn and the sag girl, yea i have compared them a bit, the same insecurites, they both quick witted, both can be a smart ass, both have a bad past.the difference is jenn was the "nerdy" type of girl and played video games like me and we could talk about those forever (which was awesome) but jenn doesnt drink, hasnt ever been drunk, she doesnt really get out there and do crazy things and have alot of fun, she doesnt swear around her friends because fear of them thinking less of her(can you believe that? cant be herself around her friends?), she was kinda boring really, but i think because she played the very very very hard to get and mysterious role that it kept me interested cause i always wanted to know more but now i could care less, she toyed with me, she wanted her cake and to eat it too.
and about the sag girl she is talkative and she can be a goof ball(just like me) she is really good at drawing, and i am too(that was a turn on) and she wears glasses sometimes if she loses her contacts(turn on) jenn wore glasses and i do also. as much as we talk and that she is going into being a criminal psychologist, and i want to be a councelor, we both think alike, we understand peoples issues and eachothers, i told her that why im still a virgin is because i was molested as a kid and that makes guys afraid of phyiscal contact and she understands that stuff, cause she was raped a few years ago, i dunno how to explain her bubbly personality and acts a little bit like a child sometimes(in a good way, cause im the same way, i can act like im 5 sometimes to get people to laugh).
but the thing is, I AM 22, jenn is 23, and sag girl(kirstin) is 19, so im 3 years older and I AM 6'5 tall, jenn is 5'8 tall, and sag girl is about 5'2 tall the sag girl used to be a ballet dancer and gymnist, which usually stunts your growth, and the question about who is hotter? LOL well they both are "chunky" girls, the sag girl is bigger, but weight doesnt change a person for WHO they are as a person. i was attracted to jenn but compared to sag girl? umm i dunno what it is, shes just cute as hell and yes im more attracted hahaha, and every girl knows the secret to a mans heart right? FOOD, i think jenn cooked but i never seen or heard about it cause she didnt talk to me, the sag girl though cooks alot and home makes it herself cause her mom taught her and ive always enjoyed cooking myself.
OK ON TO YOUR GEM GUY lol, yeah i dont get what your gem guy is trying to do, you might still feel something for him but now with everything ive done and moved on, i think ive found an even better match for me, if it works out or not? who knows? i actually thought jenn was the one i was gonna be with, but i was just dreaming literally, if jenn were to contact me again? im not really interested anymore, maybe friends but i doubt it, and since jenn still wants to talk to the sag girl and hang out with her, wouldnt that be crazy if me and sag girl were together and jenn invites sag girl to hang out but sag girl wanted to bring her boyfriend cody? (me) what a shock that would be lol. but i dont think that will happen.
wow your tall lol, thats a perfect height for a guy, give your self a high-five, well when you say chunky do you mean curvy, its a good thing dude, why would you want a skinny girl anyway lol, although im not gona lie ive had insecurities about my body but ive accepected im always going to have this shape even when i lose weight. as long as you make them know your attracted to them we women with shape have a hard time with hollywood. hmmmm seems like you'll have more fun with sag girl, let libra girl go, she isnt worth it shes all over the place and draged you half way and left you with a confused face. with gem guy I kinda thought maybe something would have happend, even though months ago I disliked him, but then he came out of his shell and wasnt the same so I ended up growing feelings for him, so yeah I do like him, and still dislike him, nothings gona happen we are both desperate and lonely I know how he feels, but thing is even if he doesnt like me as much with a spark he was willing to bare and waste his time with me,wheres I am the same way as him, but I wouldnt be so desperate to be with him, or pick him, he is messed up, if I talk to him i'd be as messed up as him, plus i dont want to hear him out im sick and tired of the sad talk, sharing emotions its annoying just get of your butt and sort your self out, so all he does is talk and he loved to hear him self talk, he would always cut me off, which annoyed me, he even knew later that he cut me off and he felt bad, i suppose you cant get to know a person, if your always self centred and always about me me me. so if your always this self centred you'll never know what you had in common with a person and to know the compatibility.
so when do you think you and sag girl would finally have a date, out side the house, do you perfer if you had a job so you could treat her for dinner, libra girl shouldnt be shocked with you and sag girl, its her lose, shes atdicted to pain so she'll never be happy, and bright side, nothing weird happend you didnt kiss or anything so dont worry, hmm today and yesterday was quite upset I hate being lonely its sooooo boring, I want to go on dinners, movies and enjoy the company of some body and know its going somewhere. I hate I wasted my time with gem-guy, cos i'd always turn down guys, and stick with him even tho nothing was happening, i suppose i was his ho-oker, ho-oker as in if you watched the show how i meet your mother, its about ppl who promise the person one day they would be with them, so nothing se-xually happens, but they dude the romantic things of what a couple would do. hmmm you know gem still has the pic of crop for him on fb, i begged him top put it up as his profile pic , but he wanted to keep this creepy one of him instead, but he still has it up, weirdly enough i croped it up for him. and i suppose he kept it up cos i said he was hansome in that pic of his, who knows, i dont care about gem guy although miss him, and would want more in the relationship. but nothing would happen and I cant wait to find a guy who suits me best. im lonely as ive mentioned alot of times lol.
oh btw i was also was raped and molested as a child and at my early teens, that is really why I could never be in a relationship, I couldnt do it, I was uncomfortable with my skin, way to emo way to depressed to have something, and as much as I was close to anything se-xual I couldnt do it, I was frozen but I've tired my very hardest to not let me hold back into living life, I'm not a tomboy emo girl no more, I care about myself I want to be a woman a girly girl, yeah I'd still have that tough tomboy chick vibe and I'll still like to listen to depressing songs, and I've always had a thing for the dark side evil grins , but now I'm okay, actually I'm as aroused as ever lol not even a gym could help to take out my frustration , I'm ready for a relationship with a guy and I cant wait to love someone and for them to love me back, I see being with someone being gold to me hoping they are my everything and that I'm like that to them, with not so much difficulties but it goes with the flow so well peacefuly and all that lol, see how romanticly I speak of it, I'm usually so cold and never show that side of me, I play the tough chick, when really I'd like someone to know its all a front, wheres gem-guy knew I was lol. seen as all that bad past of mines has made me want to have close relationships, I cant do one night stands or to much dating, I want to find the right one for me, he doesnt have to be perfect to anyone else but perfect to me, oh btw I was rapped when I was 3 and stoped when I was mayb 4-5 not show, then when I was 9 til 13 I was molested but my cousin, it too soo long to break away with out making it public or to break the family apart, it was hard cos he was my baby sitter with my sisters and his siblings. can you believe I still go to the house and try and act like nothing happend.
OK ALOT TO TALK ABOUT, first, yes im tall lol and yes i meant curvy lol, jenn wasnt skinney its just the sag girl is a little bigger, i dont like skinney girls really i want the hips and everything hahaha
OK NOW, well on friday after i wrote that message i thought i was just going to her house to hang out with her, well i was wrong, she calls me saying we are going to her friend megan's house and they having a little kickback nothing big. and of course the whole time im thinking about what shes got planned lol i might be the super nice sweet guy but im still a guy so my mind was in the gutter lmao!!! even though even if anything did happen i dont know if i would have done anything cause of fear still lol ok well anyways no nothing happened like that, we went to the house, (but she wanted beer, so i bought it, bad i know) we got there im meeting the new people and im a little nervous cause of new people, after a little while she had 3 beers(she hadnt eaten anything) and i had two beers but i wasnt feeling anything but she said she was and she was texting me still lol, saying "that guy just told me i was cute! eww gross" i would say " the guy with the unibrow!? LOL" a little later she would say "hmmm im feelin kinda flirty haha sorry lol" i think i said "ok lol" and then she said "beer is my liquid courage" i was like wtf? lol but then i understood, and she said something about not liking hair guys in a text, and i said " well all guys are hairy gonna have to deal with it" AND THEN she said " well all the guys ive been with were shaved... shave up! lol jk haha" which my first thought was "hmm well i shaved my legs and arms back in 5th grade cause all the guys were doing it, but maybe ill do it again when i lose more weight, cause i gotta show off the muscles lol" we ended up leaving around 1:30, on the way home we talking and touches my arm saying "your not shaved" i said i did shave back in 5th grade not now lol then i was like thats nothing compared to my leg hair and she wanted to feel but i was driving lol,
OK then so we got to her house and i forget what movie we watched but anyways we sitting like 2 or 3 feet apart and she says her feet were cold and they actually were so she puts them under my right thigh and they stayed there the whole movie, you could just tell it was awkward cause we both sat there doing nothing, then i ended up leaving at 5 in the morning hahaha. i get home and i get a text saying "my cat puked on my bed and im staying up :(" i said "awww that sucks, and oh by the way you looked good tonight :)" and i get " and you just telling me this now? lol" i said " yeah i know, i didnt have the guts to say it in person but you really did" she said "thank you, why couldnt you tell me? you like me but afraid to tell me? and i looked good how did that work?" and then i said " yes i like you ive said before too, but i judt worry how you gonna take things that i say" and she says " and i like you too, you've grown on me! lol but i still worry if it doesnt work out will we be friends' i said " yes i would wanna still be friends"
OK SKIPPING TO SATURDAY NIGHT, after flirty texts all day lol and i finally told her something i was afraid to say to her (im gonna skip all the little details and give the good points cause im supposed to see her again tonight and i gotta take a shower first) well what i said was, " ive liked you for a long time, you have always caught my eye but i just try not to stare at you haha, im glad the whole jenn thing happened cause if it didnt i prolly wouldnt have started talking to you and have you become my best friend, the more i found out the more i liked you. i would have never taken the chance with you before jenn so im thankful things worked out like they did and im glad i didnt pass you by :)" she says " awhh that made me smile :)" and this was during the day, then at night again we watched a movie at 2 in the morning cause her parents were still up and they dont know we now like each other more than friends, and druing the movie, omg so much flirting she was doing, the cold feet thing, punching me in the arm, poking me in the arm and i grab her hands playfully and i realized she didnt pull away she would just let me hold her hand and then i would let go and she would poke me to get me to grab her again, we played tug of war over a pillow she was holding, comparing my huge hands compared to her little ones (and my hands are soft for a guy lol not rough) and at one point i make all these comments cause i call her an oompa loompa, she 5'2 ! lol and she says that im a jerk and moves away from me, but you can tell she is just playing around, and yes she got me to stoping thinking about being closer to her and then i actually did and sat right next to her, saying " come on your not mad at me, you gonna move your feet so i can get closer?" "ill think about it" she says and i say " well i have grown on you, so whats the problem" she says " your like a tick, but i could burn you off, "but you havent yet" i said she said " nope not yet" maybe 5 min later she finally gives in and puts her legs across my lap and then later moves her left leg kinda behind me, so im like right in between her legs pretty much but she was completely comfortable and we didnt even really watch the movie we just talked, she mostly talked and i just listened (girls love that HAHA) but other than that nothing happened, we just had a good time and i went home at 5 in the morning again! lol,
OK NOW TODAY SUNDAY, we havent seen each other today but text all day again but im gonna hop in the shower and go see her in a little bit, all day we have been on whether or not everyone would be ok with us being together, (we know alot of the same people and could cause drama) she thinking my parents wouldnt except her, we textng and then i get this text message "cody i like you for you, i got to know you and you are my best friend and my parents except you so i hope yours will do the same for me if we become more" AND THEN i said " im sure they would and if they had any concerns i will talk to them, my mom would want me to be happy and if your that person she will like you, my mom knows i wouldnt just be with just anyone they would have to be special :)" and she said "same here"
well anyways, i gotta take a shower, she is getting impatient, (us both being sags lol)
ok i was in a hurry in my post up above, READ THAT FIRST! lol ill have to post what happened tonight later today i dont have time now lol,
but i wanted to talk about your past and mine lol me and you sound alot alike also, where you live? wanna date? LMAO! jk but seriously im sorry that happened to you, and i sound the same way as you lol, im 6'5 tall, 300lbs, (but i dont look like it at all), i used to work out so i got the really broad built shoulders and pretty big arms, but then my midsection turns to mush lol, i actually kinda look like a football jock, yet i hung out with all the stoners, emo/scene, heavy metal/goth kids, and i have a very evil side as well, i love my heavy metal, i was very angry kid, but not anymore, but i still love the music,
im ready for a relationship also, and i think with this sag girl its gonna happen now, i really do, it feels right, and shes never had a meaningful relationship. just ones where she got cheated on or treated like crap.
about the molested story, yeah i get it, i can believe that you act like nothing happened cause thats what ive had to do, i was molested by older brother, which im still in the same house as him so i have had to be around him my whole life everyday since then and act like it never happened and never told anybody (until i had my councling and stuff, so quite a few people know now, and that felt like the weight of the world off my shoulders). but heres the thing also my brother was molested by one of our baby sitters (i think female) so thats why he did it to me, i wonder if you ever felt the urge to do it?? when i was 12-13, i felt that urge to do it too someone, that doesnt make me a bad person, its just what happens after it happens to us you know? i never gave in to that urge i felt
wooow odd date you had there lol, when do you think you'll finally make a move? and kiss her, erm I've waited for 2 days I think so you didnt reply back, so I thought I'll let you know that I read it already, about your past, that must have been the worst for you, do you and your brother talk, do you parents know about it, did you forgive him and let it go? hopfuly your date with sag girl goes well. its good your comfortable with each other, talk more aswell dont let do all the talking.
lol yeah it was kind of a weird date lol BUT SINCE THEN oh yeah alot has happened lol well sunday we hung out again watching a movie at her house, (its kinda a secret that me and her like eachother MORE than friends now) ill tell you about the whole situation in a little bit after i tell you what happened, well sunday night we hung out and during the movie we were even more touchy feely lol had my arm around her, holding hands, at one point she even kinda took my hand and placed it on her boob LOL i was thinking ummmm ok lol she was kinda laying down with her head on my lap (a pillow on my lap first lol) and watching the movie and would look up at me when we where talking, (i could just tell that she wanted me to kiss her but i didnt go for it) she was also moving her hand up and down my right arm also lol and we finished the movie and we went out to my truck and she followed me out in the street(which doesnt happen lol) BUT i just gave her an awkward hug lol and i left, as soon as i get home i get a text saying "thanks for coming to hang out with me :)" i said " no problem, i had a really good time" and then we somehow started talking about whole the night went about my placing my hand on her boob but she said it was a nicely padded victoria secret bra so she couldnt feel it hahaha and then she also said "damn i wanted a kiss! lol hahaha" and i said " well i wanted to kiss you, but i was too nervous lol, but i could tell that you wanted me too, just never did" we didnt hang out monday night cause i was sooo tired i went to bed early,
tuesday after we text all day again we talking about how that im a little afraid of what people that we both know are gonna say about us and how "the group" was gonna ruin something good in her life (me), she likes me alot, and she always calls me "hun" or "hunny" when we text, and text we have talked quite a bit about me and her being together and that her mom approves of me if we were to date,(when her mom has never approved of anyone that she wanted to date) because she is the baby in her family, just like i am, so she is very protected by her mom, we hung out later tuesday night with yet again another movie lol being touchy feely again, she walked me out to my truck, or she stop cause she was barefoot and didnt wanna go across the street, and she kinda put her head back with her eyes closed (looking dissapointed) but just as soon as she did that i went for the kiss lol and no she didnt pull away, and so i got home and we start texting, and i said " sorry that kiss didnt go as well as i planned lol" she says "its fine, i wasnt expecting it haha" so i said " you werent expecting the kiss or just the timing of it? she says "both lol but i was too nervous to go for the kiss but i was hoping you would haha" we went silent with the texting for like 10 min then i get text saying "hmmmm lol" i said " what?" and she says " hmmm you have soft lips lol" so i said " im guessing thats a good thing haha" she says "its a very good thing lol"
Wednesday,(last night) i went to hang out at her house at noon, she was going threw boxes of stuffed animals to get rid of, after that we hung out in the living room and her head on my shoulder and her hand in mine, as her step dad gets home from work and sees us holding hands and he just walks by us with a big grin on his face, (he tried to set us up years ago) and her mom gets home also and see us and smiles like its no big deal lol we hung out the whole rest of the day and at night she invited me into her room when her mom was still awake lol, i was like uhhhh ok i guess, and shes wearing this spagetti strap little tank top haha and she is laying down and i sit at the end of the bed and she invites me to lay down (as she was checking her facebook) and she handed me her laptop and i was doing something for her while she played her gameboy playing a crossword puzzle game and i would help her on stuff she couldnt figure out, and she shows me her drawings and she asks me to draw something and im trying to draw something and talking and being playful and she takes the pad of paper and throws it on the floor and starts fighting with me lol did i tell you that she bites?? HAHA and at one point during the "fighting" match we had, i pull her in and kiss her again and she stops fighting and lays next to me and i have my arms around her start watching t.v. for a bit but still talking and she gets up for something and when she comes back to lay down she comes and kisses me twice, and i ask "what was that for?" and she says "cause i didnt kiss you back before" and i just laugh lol, AND OH BY THE WAY this whole time her bedroom door is shut cause her mom allowed it???? cause im that good of a guy??? wow i was shocked when Kirstin(sag girl) said that.
and so we put in a movie turn the lights off and i just hold her pretty much but we still talking not paying much attention to the movie, and she would turn around and plant a few kisses on me and then watch the movie again and at one point she takes my right hand and pulls it towards her chest and im like umm ok and maybe i tried to grab, but hey what was i supposed to do? lol and she is like (laughing) saying " no cody thats not what i was going for i just wanted to hold your hand close to my chest not have your hand on my chest" and she said that laughing too lol, and then i said something that one of our friends says " in our around, yes or no?" (inside joke) and she says " no cody THIS would be in!!" and takes my right hand and like has my hand dman close to under her bra for like 4 seconds and then pulls my hand away again, (in my head im thinking, wow she just did that? lol) and the more we kept talking the more dirty it got lol, i said something about having her pinned, and she says "but not the way i wanna be pinned" or when went i to yawn she said " if you yawn one more time, i promise i will do something to make you stay awake" while she is laughing and im like "oh really? what would you do? you wouldnt do anything" and she says "oh i will do something to make sure you stay awake, trust me" and then i said "ok damn now i gotta make myself yawn haha" she says " im not falling for that crap haha" and so we just had a good time being in bed holding eachother and nothing happened, (which im still afraid of s-e-x honestly) and she knows that and she even said at one point "i didnt wanna make you uncomfortable", and so a little later the night ended and we kissed goodbye,
a few days ago she asked me if she was single or taken? and i said " i think its safe to say that your taken :)" so im assuming we are BF and GF but we dont aknowlegde it to anyone quite yet, and sense she is the one i talked too the whole time during the Libra girl thing, she was jealous and with her always talking to me about all the guys after her and she was always hoping that i would show her interest and hoping it would make me make a move on her, well it kinda worked haha
Sorry about the late reply, been busy and tired and I've been ignoring the computer for a long time. so far you and sag girl are doing good, its nice to know your comfortable with each other, and so far seems, great.....i read the thread that you set up for thecaptain, hopfuly it wont hold you back into negative thoughts about being with her, who knows people could change you could change and so could she, depends if it changes the relationship for the good or best. what else has happend, has there been any other drama apart from the people gossiping which btw do all your best to ignore it, its not nice to have ppl butt in your business the only approval you should be wanting is your family and her family to and that you both make each other happy.
so far I've had a job interview the woman said she liked me and that I'd get a 50/50 chance of getting the job wish me luck. Oh yeah lately I've been thinking of gem-man, I miss him alot which I then feel soo sorry for myself, oh btw after the whole cyber bullying he was nice to me we chat about my area and so on, and I checked his page and he checked mines lol, but after awhile I suppose he was depressed and I never heard from him since I did check his fb which he didnt leave on private and most of his friends were like your all MIA what happend to you, then I notice when I finally loged into that site where we chat on the chat room, he was always on line but he never took part into the discussion broad or chat room, but I notice when I logged in he joined in all of a sudden, and he started to reply back onto his fb. I dont know what his thinking I miss him, I want to be with him, but I'm not ready to be with him, I need to feel confident with my looks with my life and myself. hopfuly having a job woul give me that, cos money is what I need at the moment. plus I think his way to stubbon to try and talk with me again or add me on fb, I blew it up the first time but for good reasons.
Do you think sag girl would hurt you? hows it going so far now? give full details lol your last message made me laugh, this is better then TV.
this is my post on the "men of zodiac" thread a few days ago
yes it is nice to have someone that is straight forward and honest like me, and me and her are boyfriend and girlfriend now, but no S-e-x yet, we have talked about and but we both scared even though she isnt virginal, she got raped two years ago and she is a little afraid and plus she is nervous around me cause she likes me alot and doesnt wanna scr-e-w up anything, so we just taking it one day at a time and theres no rush for anything but oh man does she tease me alot! ughh her parents trust me and so we were laying in her bed a few nights ago and she teases the **** out of me with her kisses, and like licking my nose,(cute i thought lol) and i would jokinly say "stop" and she would say "why? what you gonna do to make me stop? your not gonna do anything about it" and yes i didnt do anything about it lol, and so the next night we were hanging out again and she starts teasing me again and she didnt think i would do anything lol, so when i kiss her on her neck and i bite on her ear??? oh geez did i turn her on hahaha but we then her parents were still awake and she had to resist from jumping on me she said lol she didnt like it when i teased back i geuss hahaha, but then she teased me even more by umm reaching her hand "down there" and that killed me lol, but it was all in good fun, with all the clothes on, so dont freak out
that was a few days ago, recently?? pretty much the same thing HAHA she is amazed by how much i can control myself even when im turned on (if you know what i mean lol) and her hand going down there on the outside of the pants doesnt help, well i mean it does but lol she is like"most guys would have jumped on top of me because they were turned on" i said "well yeah, but i have alot of self control" and she said " and that just makes me like you even more because it shows that you respect me" i said " well im glad you can see that i do :)"
didnt i say that she likes to bite? geez both of my arms hurt like he-l-l from her! haha not that i mind but still! and the other day lol we were talking about taking her shirt off rawr lol when we laid in bed, and she was wearing two tank tops and she said that top one was the hardest one to take off and i said "well i could just rip it off?" she didnt like that because its her favorite one and she herself takes that one off but leaves the other on (ive already had my hands on her chest but havent seen them lol) so we start playing like im gonna take her shirt off from the bottom up but still laying next to her, and she starts resisting but laughing at the same time, and just when i got a hold of both her hands and try to lift off THEN she says "the clothes stay on" so i listened lol, i so could have done it but im not like that, but me and her were having fun though lol
tonight im going to see her again, we didnt hang out last night, shes been wanting a massage but i havent done it yet, i always ask " i get free reign to go where i want with my hands right? " and she said "yes" earlier today haha well shall see
i dont think the the sag girl would hurt me, i actually fear that she will be a "stage 5 clinger" (from wedding crashers) i fear that she likes me so much that because shes never had a meaningful relationship and anything that has lasted, she kept going for the same type of guy and got the same result, but now with me being a good guy and being different i think it it would kill her if it didnt work out with us. we actually had a "text talk" the other day because she wanted to see me but i had other things to do and she got mad after i said " your not my number one right now, i gotta find a job and spend time and help out other people instead of just being with you 24/7, im sorry but thats how its gotta be, you are important to me and i wanna see you but i cant all the time" she kinda got mad because she said this " i would do whatever it took to make time for you, and im soo not used to this, i have always been number one to guys, even the ones that treated me bad " THEN i said" well the reason why you were number one to them is because they wanted something from you, they showed you all this attention 24/7 because they just wanted s-e-x, which every guy has ever wanted with you as you said, I dont want just s-e-x, im actually scared of it, i respect you, care about you, we are best friends and talk about anything" AND then she says " im sorry, im no good at relationships, im gonna screw up everything with you of i keep this up i just know that i am, just like every other relationship that ive ever had, im sorry" shes so afraid of messing things up because im such a great guy(and i know i am but still, AND jenn said the same thing to me) that she was also afraid of messing things up, im starting to wonder that if im not supposed to be with anyone?? everyone seems to be soooo afraid once they find a great guy, i know i am and im gonna make someone very happy one day, but hmm i dunno, alot of the older women on this website would KI-L-L to have a guy like me (i think lol) but thats because older women KNOW WHAT THEY WANT cause after all the failed relationships they learn that the guys that they like arent the ones for them??
AND OH sag girl and jenn are still friends on myspace, and sag girl has posted some bulletins(surveys) and questions like " is there anyone you wanna date? she said "im dating him :)"
who is the last person you text? she said "cody" (me)
is the last person you texted single? she said " NOPE!!!!! :)"
and after i updated my status and i said " i cant wait to go see my babe :)"
GEUSS WHAT!!!?? jenn text sag girl, asking "hey girlie whats up?" shes says "oh nothing really, how you been doing?" and jenn said " im ok, but im lonely" sag girl said " well dont you have your boyfriend?" and jenn didnt answer back and then jenn had her update status mood at "pissed off" and then the next day "frustrated", i dont know what she is thinking but its kinda funny if she is upset over me, that would make my day, but hey if she regrets what happened?? then so be it thats her loss, i do think she really liked me at one point but its whatever now, if me and sag girl dont work out? im not gonna contact jenn, if im single in like 4 years then maybe but still, i dont like to think about jenn too much, i was stupid and i got played like a fool, oh well, kirstin (sag girl) saw what jenn wasnt seeing in me, anyways
your gem guy and you, you still want to be with him? i still kinnnda do with jenn but its not gonna happen, but thats your decision, maybe jenn was thinking like you do about your gem guy?? she wants to be with me but she isnt ready too? hmmmm she did always tell me to "go out experience life, do all the things that you told me you wanna do, travel etc..., weird lol
Wooow what alot of issues from the past you and your sag girl have, I'm sure you wouldnt mind waiting aslong as shes ready, also dont rash her, if she wants it and she feels the time to do it is the right time, then she would say so, but dont push her. Erm yeah with her wanting alot of attention and wanting only you time together like always, isnt going to work, she needs to know rea relationships are bassed either spending so little time together at the start, cos you have to find a job, she needs to focus what ever she does school or job, friends and family ect, and the same with you. hopfuly she'll understand that, properly that would be a big problem with the both of you, you dont give her that much attention and she seems quite needy I suppose, you can try your best with her and so on. Libra girl hmmmm she has a whole of issues of her own dramatic may I say, she does seem like me but I was ready for a relationship but I was unsure if that relationship should have been with gem-man I didnt trust him on some certain issues, and now I want a relationship only now I go back and forth in my mind thinking was it worth it, to blow him off like that, is it worth it that he didnt want to talk to me ever again, I dont see much with him now that my emotions for him is confussing, I want a relationship with what ever guy comes into my life that is good to me, but at the moment I cant everything changed when it was after new years, I cant be in a relationship you have to put all your effort and make it work, but I cant give that guy what he wants, firstly I need to sort out my self job, and new clothes new beauty products seen as tho i have no confidence at all and I'm insecure and not happy with my self, plus if I get the job I'll feel better about myself and find a guy. but the worst thing about it I cant anyone, and thats why I keep thinking about gem-man, but I dont think its right to turn to him he is in the same place as me, unhappy with life and confused of what he wants, worse thing the main problem is not having a job. if only we had those two things, perhapes us being together wouldnt have been so difficult. if I'm lucky I'd find a guy who is right for me, if not I cant help to wonder if gem-man maybe the one who is right for me. argh I think he did him self no justice by being such a jerk to me, with all that crap its become so weird to take him seriously now reason why its confusing with him.
Plus libra is funny with her emotions on myspace, it was her lost she may had other reasons why she couldnt be with you, but I think it isnt a couldnt enough reason why she dragged you along.
ME rush HER? hahahaha, shes the one that was unsure of doing anything because she thought i wasnt ready, she is always the one to make the first move, she teased me two nights in a row licking my lips etc... and what i said up above about me wanting to take her shirt off, she was laughing the whole time BUT because she thinks her boobs are small she didnt want me to see them but has no problem letting me have excess to them with the lights off so i cant really see them lol and yeah friday and saturday night were intense LOL,( no s-e-x) friday alot of heavy flirting, making out, her hand going *down there" on me, with all clothes on mind you haha me kissing her neck and biting her ears(huge turn on for her) lol and something else happened at the end that she taunted me with and she wanted to do to me, i was nervous but i went with it, not gonna go into details lol, that was friday night,
saturday pretty much the same things ended up happening, making out etc.... (this is all in her room on her bed, lights off, and parents asleep) and this night, i gave her a massage that she wanted first then she came on to me after lol, both nights i was on top of her well friday my lower body wasnt, saturday it was lol, still with all clothes on we were good..........kinda lol her top was down thats it, BUT saturday she had her legs wrapped around me and my ahem was at full attention (of course she knew it, which turned her on even more) we were both at the point where we both thought it totally sucked that we didnt have protection, and i got her to the point where she almost gave in, we both said things like " god, i want you so bad right now" pretty much we tortured ourselves cause we didnt wanna risk it, and when i said i should leave and i got up and turned around she sits up and starts kissing my neck and stuff, and im thinking " geez you make it hard to leave" lol
for me being a virgin i sure do know how to turn her on ALOT too haha, and then the next day (yesterday) we didnt hang out and outta no where i get this text from her saying " god, i still want you so bad hahahaha"
and we did talk about her always wanting to be with me and getting mad when im not with her. and she understands that now, and last night we were texting again, and she still wanted to know why i like her, (still fearing that i just want s-e-x), and so i told her and she text back saying "awh that made me cry, and a good cry" and then she text me saying what she liked about me, she said " that i make her smile even when she wants to cry or be mad, its impossible for her to be mad at me. that i give her butterflies when i kiss her, or she has butterflies when im just around her not doing anything" (theres more to what we said but i dont wanna type it out) and she even said, "you are everything i could ever want in a man, you are absolutly amazing" . i was just blown away with everything
i almost cant believe im posting this stuff lol, but your entertained huh? haha
LMAO yeah I was entertained, I was shocked you post that too lol maybe you could put it PG 13 , I thought you was gona mention some drama, but meh its cool loool. I'd feel like that if a guy wants to talk to me, he is only up for s-e-x that the main issue women have with men, we dont want to be used like an blow up doll. so keep being a gentlemen, hopfuly you'll prove to her that your serous and you could take her out to resturants, and buy her gifts. btw I cant believe her parents fall asleep and allow you and her alone in her bed room, for real they must be different, so do you think you'll see a long future with her? I wonder how libra girl is feeling now she must got the big hint that you and sag girl are together. lol good luck with the teasing,
lol, yeah we did go out to olive garden the other day(like her favorite place) and yes i paid lol and we already have plans for us going to Nascar (she is a nascar fan lol her and my family both are, me? not so much but im starting to like it) nascar is in two weeks and i will meet her DAD for the first time(she lives with step dad) and i will meet her oldest sister (which is my age.........that should go well.....not!) and ive already met her middle sister which im a little older than and she is going as well, as well as their boyfriends, i gonna be a little awkward i think but ahh well.
we kinda had a hard time yesterday when we texting, she text me saying "brandon emailed me..... god i hate when he does this to me" i asked "does what?" and she said " he just has this way of pulling me back in" and im like " oh ok.........." (WHAT YOU DONT KNOW is brandon is the guy she was gaga over the same way i was over jenn, so we text about this because she did say "that he pulls her back in" and i said " so the way you fear that i might go running to jenn works both ways i guess" and she responds back saying " what?? you think id be stupid enough to go back a 2nd time? well i did go back more than twice but i wouldnt admit it,..........wait i just did ...f--u-ck" i text back "................" and she says " cody, i like you, i like you alot! i cant forgive him for what he did to me, and you mean more to me than he ever did, you are too good to give up" and because im a little upset, i said " you fear that if jenn ever came around and gave me attention that id go right? well truth is i dunno what i would do, it would be tempting yes but then i would think of all the bull-s-h-it that happened and i wouldnt go" then she text me back saying " so theres a chance you would? ..........thanks for being honest i guess but......and thanks for the tears also" i respond asking " why? why are you crying?" she says " because of our lack of trust in each other"
we fixed everything and i went to see her last night, it was a little awkward because of what we talked about, but after a few mins it was back to normal, no crazy making out or anything just hanging out and we both got tired and i left about 12:00 when her parents set a 11:00 time to leave for anyone thats over on the week days, and we just text just now about us always breaking the rule and how we are gonna try to keep the rule and follow it now. we had a little thing happen yesterday but everythings fine :).
AND what about you and gem guy!!!??? you still want to be with him but you feel that your not ready to be with him?? hmmmm thats interesting, i have a feeling that is how jenn has felt about me, and now she might be wondering if she did the right thing, a part of me thinks that she was ready for me to step up to the plate and kiss her etc... but since i never did and i kinda stopped all contact with her for two months straight i think she lost all those feelings that she had for me and she might have thought that i was playing with her actually, when i wasnt, i havent heard from her and i dunno if jenn has caught on to me and sag girl yet actually, sag girl hasnt heard anything from jenn cause im sure she would, both of our relationship status are both on single still and we really dont tell everyone that we are together yet and we dont even seem like it in public either, no holding hands, no kiss in public, we talk alot though because we were friends first, well will get to that point soon but i think we fear of everyone we know going "awwwwwwww" when they see us together and embrassing us lol and staring and talking about us, cause we just know that it will happen.
ah oh, your must feel nerves now meeting her real dad, I wonder how your gona impress this one lol good luck you need it, cos you dont know his charater lol if his over protective or laid back and willing to know you. enjoy your self....wooow with the texting, it seems like arguments are easy to make, you guys shouldnt be having these little things bothering you just yet you still have only just went out. it should be based on fun, adventure, and just pretty intense you know nothing more, she needs to take things lightly and you need to watch what you say cos you should know she is sensetive well thats what she sounds to me. scared of making a mistake so she makes a big deal which is only so little to make an argument or to make her cry.
me and gem nothings happing just missing him, well I miss men's company now sucks alot life is boring and depressing I dont even flirt no more argh, just gona wait until I loose weight which I have to wait around may the 19th and mean time to buy cute outfits and I'm done I'd atleast feel comfortable with myself. libra girl properly feels like me she wants someone, and it isnt cos shes ready she just isnt confident with her self, like I am if I'm with a guy im not much to talk nower days and I dont feel comfortable with my body even tho people say it looks nice but I think losing atleast 2 stones or a stone would make me happy. oh not forgetin MONEY lol a job .