Leo guy-why do men need to lie?

  • I am a leo, and I had been seeing a cancer guy long distance for awhile, but since he's going hot and cold I decided to see other guys .

    There's a Leo guy that has been my completely platonic friend for about 5 years, but lately we've been spending more time together. He is quite busy, travels overseas alot and has come in and out o my life even as a friend, sometimes he disappears for months, doesn't answer my calls or e-mails. He keeps a low profile online, and isn't a part of any internet social networks. he actually sounds like a cancer.

    Anyway, we've spend a lot of New year's together so I went out with him to watch the fireworks on the beach last night, but he's acting like he's in a hurry. He said he had a business meeting to go to with some people that came from Shanghai. Who the heck has a business meeting with people after midnight on New Years Eve? I asked him that and he said that Chinese people celebrate Chinese New years which is in february, so to them New year's Eve means nothing. This was about 12:15 am, right after midnight. He leaves, and then soon later I get a call from one of my girlfriends that was at a party but wanted to hook up and go out, so I went out with her and her brother-in-law. We go bar hopping, and finally we get to this one bar and there is my Leo friend sitting at the bar with this girl drunk and hanging on to him!! Meeting with Chinese people from Shanghai? She was a white chick! She wasn't Chinese!

    I looked at him and smiled and then ignored him. He looked terrified, almost like he was afraid I'll go and say something. Why did he have to lie to me? We were friends for 5-6 years! he even knows about my cancer guy, in fact he drove me to the airport when I went to Manila to see him! I don't care if he had a date with another girl! Why did he have to tell me it was a business meeting? Why can't he be honest with me and say "I would like to spend NYE with you but I have another date"? I felt like saying "So how is your business meeting?" but I just left without saying anything to him. I wasn't going to contact him either, just to see how he was going to handle this. Tonight I got an e-mail from him saying "Happy New Year, my this year be a great year for you" like a greeting card.

    What should I do? Should I confront him? There is no reason for him to lie to me but he did and that is what I am really upset about.

    Anyway, I went out with my friend and her brother-in-law who is a Libra and had a good time. I think the Libra guy likes me so maybe I'll just go out with him.

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  • I am bumping up this thread to see if I get any responses

  • Luazinha: so i came and read your post about leo guy. wow. must tell my story as short as i can, might help or at least you'll know you're not alone with this problem.

    when i started university like 9 years ago, in the first months i became very good friends with a leo guy. rather to say best friends. he was amazing and caring, hanging on me all the time. we spent every day together, though he had gfs all the time. he ran with all kinds of problems to me and generally loved to spend time with me. brought me to school, brought me home, to the cinema, shopping, eating out, parties. now looking back, i'm quite sure he was in love with me, but he didn' t dare to make a move, since i really cared for him but always told him how he treats women i would never hook up with him. my words counted him a lot in any matters. i was in his life quite deep, so had the glance at how he is unnecessarily lies to everybody, to his gfs, to his father etc. then when he got together with a girl (about whom i thought she is not fitting for him and i was right later she terorized the s.h.i.t out of him) he started to lie to me too. he always told something else where he is, when he was with her. though i just simply told him i think that girl is not good for him. but my words were so important that he rather lied, though i wouldnt have done anything wrong to him. so when i saw he is lying, i broke every contact to him. didnt pick up the phone, ignored him, didnt talk to him a word. all the friends were telling, that he is suffering so much and that he misses me, i didnt let it go. after a while he came up to me and tried to talk always, but i ignored. months passed when he was still trying and i gave in. we got back to best friends again. and he was amazing again. he was talking about buying a house what i like for US (???) and tried to sabotage all my relationships, telling that he is the one who will marry me. i was very low on self confidence, never believed him... then he pulled the same act again... told everyone that i am the one in love with him. i got furious, sent him to hell in a textmsg. he never dared to talk to me again. for long years he always asked about me from friends, and told he misses me a lot. i didnt care.

    a year ago or so, he contacted me through a facebook kind of forum, i answered, he offered a meeting, i somehow got out of it... he is married now.

    so yes, my leo lied a lot to everyone. for me it looked like he needed to lie cause he had this urge to fit himself to everyone. if you know what i mean. he lied about his university grades to his father, cause he knew the father will be disappointed with bad grades... etc.

    i hope it helps a bit....

  • Thanks Katie-i think it makes sense that you said he lies to fit in with everyone. Didn't know Leos were liers. I'm a Leo, and I've told white lies not to hurt people but I don't tell flat out lies, especially to friends I know and trust.

    he's sent me three e-mails since New year's eve, all just saying hi and acting like nothing happened. I am still ignoring him.

  • luazinha: yes, ignore him for a while... and see what happens. if you are worth for him (and i guess you are) then he is gonna fight and go after you.... 🙂 at me it worked..

  • Update-he called when i was out with the Libra guy. i didn't answer the phone. He also e-mailed me asking if everything was ok because I usually respond quickly and he hasn't head from me. Still acting like nothing happened. I'm going to wait a few more days then confront him.

  • Now he is stalking me...

  • bump still hoping someone will respond

  • hi luazinha, i didn't get from your post are you in love with this guy or are you just close friends? Either way you've made him wait for awhile now and if you care that much and you are bother about the whole situation i think there is nothing wrong to ask for an explanation as to why would he lie to you although it looks to me that he probably didn't want to hurt your feelings by saying to you on NYE that he has a date with someone else...It could be he has feelings for you so he doesn't want to ruin his chances by offending you saying to you he has plans with someone else. Say i was out with a guy i cared about and i had a date later with someone else i'd probably lie too...but probably will come up with something better then a business meeting at 12.15am on NEY 😉

  • Luazinha: i dont know whether you ever mentioned or not, if this Leo guy treats you as a friend or is he wanting more?

    cause honestly, when i read the whole story (in the other topic) of the you ignoring-he stalking you part... it didnt sound like you were only important for him as a friend...

    just a thought, thats how it comes through for me...

    did you talk to him since then? or still ignoring him?

  • katie-I think he wants more than a friendship because he started acting crazy when I ignored him. He stalked me, went to the coffee shop where I hung out, came to y door at 1:30 am, then left and came back at 2:30 am! I couldn't sleep because of him knocking so late!! I haven't been home all day-I came home after being out all day at 10 pm. Today he did not call me, not sure if he came over. I will talk to him but his actions yesterday kind of freaked me out.

    redgemini-we have been close friends for any years but I think he wants more, I am not in love with him, I am in love with a cancer guy that lives in another country that I don't see that often, and the leo guy knows this. Yeah, business meeting at 12:15 am on NYE is pretty lame. He hurt my feelings more by lying.

  • Luazinha, I had a friend of mine we shared a desk in high school for 5 years and then we went our separate ways studying at uni in different countries. We stayed in touch sometimes didn't hear from him for months sometimes he called every other day. At some point i started thinking "wait a minute none of my other friends from high school calls so often" and soon he admitted to me he has been in love with me for the past 8 years (at this point i haven't seen him over a year and was with someone). I was shocked with his confession, although i suspected that he might be into me, i had idea he had such deep feelings for me for so long without ever mentioning anything when there was a chance between us. After this I tried to stay in touch but decided that i need to stop contact and allow him to move on coz i had no feelings for him and didn't want to stop him from having meaningful relationships with other people.

    What i am trying to say is that you might see this guy as a platonic friend but may be he has feelings for you. If that is the case in my opinion you need to talk to him and set things straight if you care about him as a friend. I think you should definitely confront him and use this as an opportunity to tell him that you don't want anything more then friendship with him and that you don't mind him having dates so there is no need of lying to you. It's better to may be hurt him now then lose your friendship forever or keep him hoping for more.

    Hope this helps.

  • Luazinha: if you haven't talked to him yet. when you do, let us know how it went. im really interested what he is gonna say. 🙂

  • redgemini-I've been friends with this guy for about 6 years. He was always secretive about his personal life, but I know he had a girlfriend he lived with for awhile although he always called her his "friend".

    katie-i haven't talked to him yet. I have a feeling he is going to deny it. One time I was trying to get ahold of him and kept calling him and he told me his phone was broken, but I think he lied. he has disappeared for months before, ignored my e-mails and phone calls but when i ignore him for a few days he goes nuts. Sounds like a cancer with his disappearing acts.

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