• leoscorpion>>you mean the chart I made you?

    I don't remember seeing that you 're not compatible with anyone, come on

    I did see that you have what it takes to live alone, but not necessarily you will be alone LOL

    just that if you haven't find someone that is fine, but doesn't mean you won't

    Bah, that doesn't even sound right

    Sandran712>>Yeah I've had that chart before.So you did do it right.It just made me sound so depressing.Even hanswolfgang said I would never find anyone and The Captain did a compatibility analysis on me too.

  • well the chart is made based on planet position when you were born

    the future is 90% fate, 10% yourself

    you gonna find someone. just go out more, smile more, and don;t be shy

    I'm gonna see what else I can pull out for you and I'll see your chart again in case I miss anything

  • Igohumbly, I feel we are kindrid spirits and empathize with you. I too, have made alot of immature decisions that have caused me to be stuck at home with my parents but i have 5 more years on u. I too, have a child but mine is a son, and I am trying to do right by him. He is 2 1/2. I too, am torn and have 3 career choices in the air, and I am driving myself crazy about which is the path to follow. I also empathize with u about how it would hurt when u care about someone and your dream. I have had those dreams, but I dream things that happen. I don't know if that happens to u. It is hard to do the next right thing all the time. I had to leave someone behind for a while to do right by me. I have a dysfunctional family, and alot of times by being in the nest, it leaves one feeling helpless and dependent which is frustrating. If my person ever met someone and settled down with someone other than me, it would kill me inside. But, as long as I have my son and he is healthy, that is all that matters bc he changed my whole world and was a big part of helping me do what I can not do for myself when it comes down to it. He made me want to be a better person. your post actually helped me, bc I get caught up in my head and forget what I actually have. I have been feeling really depressed lately as well, so I know I am not alone.

  • Just realized there was this forum. I am depressed at 2AM after having a horrible dream. I was sleeping so well; and that is difficult because of various medical reasons. My family is completely toxic; been estranged for over 14 years. Have a husband; he just woke up. We are in the worst place financially after he was laid off in Feb. Things are difficult. I read all this advice & it is all stating the obvious. When you feel like hell and things truly are horrible it is time to experience the feelings and stop acting like you can busy yourself out of it, exercise it away, blah blah blah. We are living in a dark time, an Economic Depression, terrorist threats on top of whatever your personal problems happen to be. Another person won't erase it, your child won't make it disappear; there is a lot of garden variety advice that I can do without. Things suck and they will until they don't.

  • I think you are on the right track to changing your life, but that your level of depression is inhibiting you from doing it. Depression is a physical illness and it may take some work to lift your energy to the level you should be at. I see you as a person with solid potentials and capabilities that have been as yet, untapped. You are going to need to do something different than you have been doing. There is a cycle you are in now that you need to break out of and it will require a higher energy level to do this. Think about people who are focused on personal growth and health... join a group of people who are into a type of excercise you like doing. Cardio excercise can fire up your brain to the degree that you will find yourself being active in more positive pursuits. Many creative people suffer mental ailments or emotional setbacks, do not think yourself to be alone in this. Get out and go walking every morning, do it early and don't neglect it. You need to find a new way to start the day. When you walk, meditate on yourself moving forward in your life with each step.

  • virgogirl>>Many creative people suffer mental ailments or emotional setbacks,

    Sandran712>>I believe this..I go to a holistic doctor/chiropractor..And I have been in some considerable pain over the holidays.He told me I am a very emotional person and it taking a toll on my body physically.But, I also have a low thyroid.So I have to be careful not to get depressed any more than I need to.

  • leoscorpion>>I'm gonna see what else I can pull out for you and I'll see your chart again in case I miss anything

    Sandran712>>Thanks Leo.I can't believe I am non existant.Even that seems weird.My intuition tells me I will find someone but, not until I am older than I am now.It sounds depressing.But,you cannot force something to happen when it won't go anywhere.

  • ckdgh703

    , Hi. Gee we do seem to be in pretty similar situations, I feel like I am just all over the place and have no foundation. As far as my career, everything being up in the air, being indecisive.. just makes things worse! Decisions ARE good. I need to just stick with one and have confidence and faith that its the right one. I think im just too afraid of failure. You have 5 more years on me..oh my goodness. Isnt it just the worst!!!!???@@@####@$

    As far as your carrer.. Just make a decision and dont look back, even if you feel maybe youve made the wrong one, Just keep with it and have faith that everything WILL work out. Its easier said than done though, I shouldnt even try to give you any advice because im in the same situation!

    Virgogirl, I used to exercise, I used to ride my bike and it made me feel so much better. I just havent in months. I do know for sure that it does help. And you're right, Ive been doing the same thing for years. I need to try something else because whatever im doing is not working. Actually, everything im doing is not working or helping its a stupid cycle. You're absolutely right.

    The cycle of depression. The wheel of death!!

  • Sandran

    The future is our own making. Life challenges will always come. It's how you deal with it, that determines the outcome. You haven't found anyone yet, but doesn't mean you will stop hoping, stop looking, or fall into despair. None of this will help, and when in despair, you will end up blaming everything and everbody. This is only going to make it worse.

    Stand up and face the challenges. You do this for your son, you can do it for your love life. Stay positive, stay smiling even if you are in sorrow. 90% may be fate, but the 10% is how you deal with it. If you refuse to give up hope, you will get there. Now let me get to the charts I promise other people, then I will look into yours.

  • Igohumble:

    Like the four seasons changing, there is one thing about life you CAN count on, that always occurs, and that is change. Nothing stays the same, whether we want it to or not. Right now, it seems your season is a dark winter, and a long one at that, which seems to never be coming to an end, but all winter eventually ends and after winter comes spring. And what you learned during the dark and cold of winter in survival skills you will be better for, have more compassion for others, be a deeper more interesting person, and such will fuel and will spark your creativity as a source for inspiration in the future when you are far beyond the worries you have today.

    Always remember, if you don't like what is going on in the present, sometimes the most you can do is ride the storm and just survive the torrent and rain and lightning until the present storm passes. And it will pass. That is the cycle of goes up and it goes down and the seasons change in their due cycles and we are not all on the same cycle. Some do well in the begiinning and the hard times come later and they have to survive and grow throgh that then, and some have trouble early on but once they learn to really fly, they tend to soar much higher.

    These days, there are a lot of folk experiencing tough times, so you are definitely not alone. There are many stranded on deserted islands just trying to survive, trying to find a rock to bash open that luscious, nourishing coconut for the sweet milk it has hidden inside and after finding one, trying to use what little energy you have left after starving and being so thirsty for so long that your strength seems far too weak to put forth the energy to even break open that hard shell to get to the pure sweet and nourishing coconut milk to fuel your body and soul and spirit for another day of survival. But you cannot give up hope. You have to still look up to the heavens and wish on the stars and believe. Without hope and without a dream to aim for, you can't go anywhere,

    It can be the absolute worst thing when you feel TRAPPED on a deserted island and when you are in the company of a negative crew and it appears you have no place to go to get away from it. WHile you are on the island, refuse to listen to negativity coming from others or from yourself. That will destroy you faster than lack of food and water. Number two, if there is any way to get off the deserted island, to find your own island of paradise, even if you have to stay in a shanty, lean-to, just to get away from the depressing crew complaining about what they think all your faults are and what you aren't doing and what you should do, do it. Section 8 housing and even homeless shelters, literally, are sometimes better----depending on the situation, than being in a negative environment. You don't need any help to feel bad about yourself, you can handle that on your own, right? There's nothing worse than being around negative family and/or friends that make you feel even worse than you already were to begin with. So the criticisim, external and internal, isn't helping anything at all. It is your worst enemy. And those we love the most, who seem to mean well and in facxt, do mean well, can often make us feel the worst, thinking they are helping, but doing more harm than good. They may think that just because they are helping you financially or letting you stay there that this gives them full license to belittle you or make you feel worse, and it may be unintentional. They may not know the effect they are having. They may be feeding the problem and not the solution and not even know it. Do not let your family dictate your worth and value. You are priceless. If at all possible, I would find ways to get out of that house and the sooner the better. There are grants and scholarships and vocational training especially open to single parents. Vocational rehab training programs will pay for all of your education but not for living expenses, so that is one route to see if you qualify for those and for educational grants targeted for single parents and then programs tat can fill in the gaps for the living expenses. Sometimes the universe is waiting for us to take a step first in any direction before it opens the doors to opportunity. Take the free city and county skill or job courses and seminars in your area, where at the very least you get out and meet people also in the same shoes; you'd be amazed at what doors can be opened. Apply for grants for education and sign up for section 8 or low income housing, in the interim, if need be. At least look into such possibilities.

    What is it that would make you the most happy to do in life? You already know what that would be but perhaps others have made you feel such would be foolish or that you would not be able to for one reason or another. One's heart's desire is placed there for a reason. Let that be your motivation; you only need to believe all things are possible to begin with and then go for it! It coudn't get any worse, right? The worst is to do nothing and be so afraid to fail that you never try. If it doesn't work, you just try plan B. You said you have thought of photography but dont have the right camera or equipment, there must be resources somewhere in the form of grants or loans or a used version in the interim or loaner in the interim and then you mentioned graphic design or the arts. Web designers (who are also artists with creative abilitiy) are in huge demand, and don't leave fine art out of the picture; you can do that at anytime alongside whatever else you are doing; it is also a great stress reliever, to slop on some paint onto some paper or canvas without worrying about making realistic impressions in painting, the freer the better! Just google abstract art or modern art to see some of the crazy things that sell these days. You can do an artist blog for free or website fhosted for 5 to 10 dollars a month. If you learn to do website design, you can then design your own and go into business yourself selling either art, photography, or anything at all you want online. The possibilities are endless. There is no point going to school for something that won't make you happy in life as it won't motivate you. Go for the gold in your heart's desire. This is the time to dream big! It doesn't matter where you have been in life thus far, yesterday is over, and today is a new day! You must always keep hope alive and your dreams alive, no matter what anyone says, no matter what your family says or your freinds, whether they believe something is possible or not, doesn't matter, because all things are possible! It doesn't matter if you haven't a penny, if you have hope, if you can still look up and wish on a star and believe it is possible, and it is possible, anything is possible, you can do anything. But you have to let go of past events; what has happened in the past does not define who you are and what you will become. Past experiences have added to your character, have taught you much, if not at the very least what not to do and how to be more compassionate toward others in the same shoes to be able to say, "been there and done that!", but do not let it dictate your life now.

    Even if it was getting into section 8 housing, just to get out of your current living arangement, I would do it! You need to use every resource out there in community services just for your morale as your environment right now seems to be partly the enemy. Second, mistakes in the past bringing you down, which you need to refuse to allow to define you any more........let it go!

    Einstein was kicked out of school and his teachers predicted he would forever be a loser and amount to nothing, but he had not yet blossomed into his full potential! And neither have you! He too had his share of troubles, but he did not give up.

    And whatever happens, your child is a precious gift. Your child needs you and you need them. You are the one that dictates your own future, not your family and friends.

    When deciding what you should aim towards, be it photography or graphic design or something else, you don't have to know for sure to start if you go the traditional college route in taking general educational courses, or if you know what your heart's desire is, look instead at scholarships and grants and other programs that help finance this for people in your situation and be persistent. The sweaky wheel gets the grease.

    Many, many blessings!

  • igohumbug....your local unemployment office has a program which you might be interested in...its called JOBS here but may be listed as something other where you are.This program trains you for a job,puts you through school even if you choose a trade or no cost.Utilize your local resources and you will find your situation changing.and as that happens,your attitude will become more posative also.never give up never know when someone will put a bee in your bonnet and a smile on your face.good luck

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