Mysterious Leo woman perplexing cancer man



  • OK, I need to know whether this relationship makes sense. I met a Leo woman via on-line dating service. She seemed nice and was attractive so I invited her to dinner and a jazz concert. The evening was a smash. The food was great the concert was better. She was so thrilled and pleased.

    She said she did "project implementation" and traveled almost 60% of the time on her job. I thought that was brutal but thought, hey we can see each other on the weekends and make good use of our time. I was concerned because SHE WOULD ONLY GIVE ME HER FIRST NAME. At first, I thought ok she left what she says was a 20 year marry and her husband would not leave her alone. So she move from LA to Seattle to get away from him. So I thought she was well-founded in having truths issue.

    We dated several time and kept up on email. We spent time over my house alone where i cooked her dinner and we made out on the couch. Didn't go all the way because she jumped up to leave at the last possible second.

    I invited her to holiday dinner with me, my daughter and her new friend and my grand kids. She turned me down and said she was leaving town until next year to spend the holidays with her son and his family. She said she wanted me to wait for her and she wanted me to assure her I would be here when she got back. At first I said yes. But after I thought about how I only got to see her on weekends and how she still atter almost a month of dating had not told me her last name I said no. I told her I joined the dating service as not to be alone. I also, confronted her for the 3rd or 4th time about not telling me her last name.

    She has not return my email so i think it might be over. I don't know. Was I wrong? Should I have just accept the lighthearted fun and exploration we were enjoying. I thought she was beautiful and sexy while she thought I was a good looking and fit. We sizzled together when we touched. Now I back alone and wondering whether I was being properly cautious or Cancerian male overly self-protective.

    What do you think????



  • if she has trust issue, it will take a long time for her to get over it

    many times we jump into love with all our hearts

    so when it doesn't work it will be hard for us to recover and we can turn cold and unforgiving

    and will choose lust over love

    the question she asked you, shows you mean something to her

    why would she bother asking whether you will be there or not, if to her you are only a fling?

    don't expect her to read you, she can't. she doesn't.

    she will go with what you say and do. you said yes then no, to her this means you aren't sure

    if she has trust issue, uncertainty will turn her off and she will drop you and look for another

    she does tell you how busy she is, she won't have time for uncertainty

    I can't say you are wrong to ask her last name, but then again I don't see why you have to ask since you can communicate with her wihout knowing it and you do know she has trust issue

    it will take longer than a month for her to get over her past let alone give you her last name



  • What you say makes sense but why would she trust coming over to my house at night with me all over her? Oh, it's emotional trust not physical trust. I may have screwed up! So how do I approach a wounded woman with trust issues...

    The one thing I was afraid of was whether the whole husband thing was a lie and she is a married woman having men in the cities she frequently comes to for work. Gives her free meals and entertainment while on the road. This did pick up some of the costs. Why couldn't she just make up a name? It's not like it's something I could check and call her on. Still mysterious. Never met a women that wouldn't give her name. I wonder is trust issue with her husband can explain such eccentric behavior???



  • Never met a women that wouldn't give her name? LOL I am one of them and yes I am leo.

    Not because I had bad relationship, I used my real name online once and all of the sudden I had all these spam emails selling shoes, impotency stuffs whatever using my name online

    At work the guys kept talking about it since they didn't know it wasn't me

    You may think this is laughable issue but to me it isn't. It ruined my reputation and if I could hunt down these people I would do it myself.

    Now imagine her going through this psycho ex thing, which is a lot bigger problem than mine, it will take a long time for her to ever reveal her true identity

    I said psycho, because otherwise she won't go through the hassles moving away to avoid him

    maybe he is not psycho like psycho killer, but that marriage certainly was one h ell that she will do anything to forget that period and relocating is one way to do it

    She didn't make up a name, because she didn't want to lie. fire signs can't lie well, not saying we are angels, we just can't. we are too blunt, saying things without thinking at times,

    how do you keep a lie if you can't watch what you say? see what I mean?

    so if we do lie, you will find out - being water sign, use your intuition, you will know

    plus we don't like too much hassle, covering up a lie is too much hassle than just say it as it is

    If you do have that suspicion, why don't you ask the dating service?

    if you know her DOB, let me know both yours and hers I will pull out a chart or something

    no need for names or location



  • She's August 2nd and I'm July 7th. She's 48 and I'm 53. That's all I know. I can see not revealing her name on-line. Why not tell me as we got hot and heavy on my couch. Why would you do that with someone you wouldn't trust with you name???

    Also, I ended a 30 year relationship when I found out my partner was having an affair. After she left, my house and my heart was empty. This e-dating thing was my way of getting back into dating after 30 years. A lot has changed, but as a professional there are just not enough venues to meet the opposite sex and I don't want to be known as a flirt at networking events.

    She dates me, she'sgone for days no communication. I email her with no response; however, if I invite her out or to a weekend date I get immediate response. She simply says that her job is intense and she's all over the country working 13-16 hour days. Ok. I understand but am I a weak man because I'd like to see her more? Can a woman respect a man that willing to give her this much space and control over the relationship? The biggest question is suppose i fall in love with her, then what. I will really be restless in Seattle waiting on my plane love to return. Not know when or where in the world she is.



  • lawdawq. My god . It makes such a difference for a cancer man to be chasing someone ? My cancer fella is the opposite . I would very much appreciate it if you could read my story "Have I lost my cancer b/f for good " We used to text and phone one another constantly , then he went back to India on holiday and while there his parents arranged a marriage for him . Things were ok for a while told me not to worry as he was not getting married in the near future and it was me he loved , then he went back there 8 weeks ago and I've heard nothing since . Just dumped me like that . I would love to hear your point of view as you being a cancer .and all that . Could you plz respond on my forum . Thank you .



  • Lawdog,

    I am getting a very clear, no doubt about it message that this woman is married. I think you already know this, deep down.

    The night she came over to your place, you didn't "go all the way" because though she is bored and not as fulfilled in her marriage as she wants to be, she isn't at all intending on ending it and does not want to "officially cheat." That is her rationale her way of allowing herself to chase after that spark without feeling too guilty.

    Be glad that this is the beginning stages of the relationship and you haven't invested too much of yourself in it it.

    Blessings and Light



  • Sorry Lawdawg, I misspelled your name:)



  • Mercury - Venus

    Positive aspect: A relationship which will be agreeable, they will like to speak to each other, have a good intellectual understanding, their tastes will be very similar, they will like to share their feelings with each other.

    Mercury - Neptune

    Negative aspect: This relationship can only bring illusions, and therefore also disappointments will follow. These two people can never understand each other and if they insist on living together, it will be with lies and deception.

    Venus - Mars

    Negative aspect: A love that is particularly based on physical understanding, a passionate love with all its negative sides: possessiveness, jealousy, aggressiveness. Such a union is unlikely to last.

    Mercury - Uranus

    Positive aspect: No clouds in this couple's life. They have a good intellectual understanding, take pleasure in being together, in discussing and exchanging ideas.

    Mercury - Saturn

    Positive aspect: If Mercury is looking for a mother or father in the spouse, then this aspect is very favorable. Saturn will give a lot on the intellectual level and in life in general.

    Saturn - Uranus

    Negative aspect: Complete mutual lack of comprehension. This relationship is to be avoided, or else countless conflicts will arise.

    Venus - Jupiter

    Positive aspect: This union will be completely successful. A couple that is happy to be alive, and to live together, with a pleasant family and home, total confidence in each other (and with reason), intellectual understanding, similar tastes.

    Jupiter - Uranus

    Negative aspect: An unfavorable union, nothing in common.

    Saturn - Neptune

    Negative aspect: Unlucky union.

    Venus - Neptune

    Positive aspect: Favorable union, they have the same artistic tastes in common, their life will sometimes be full of fantasy.

    Jupiter - Uranus

    Positive aspect: This union can be favorable, if the two mutually respect each other. They both like their independence, their freedom of thought and action.

    Venus - Uranus

    Positive aspect: Union or love will be very strong, not at all intellectual, but sensual and full of romanticism and originality.

    Lawdawg I don't know if the age is right, but I pull out something for you anyway.

    It's clear you don't understand her and I'm going to guess she doesn't understand you. You did say about physical attraction, you think she is attractive and she thinks you are.

    About not giving identity online, well you two met through online dating, didn't you? To her it wouldn't be different than meeting in real life. You are both real people meeting through the online service.

    About not giving her last name when you were both kissing, I had done that myself. I was single and the guy was too. I didn't give my real name and we did kiss but I changed my mind half way, then I left. There was nothing wrong with the guy. I just had a break up before that and somewhere along the way when we kissed I remember the person that broke my heart and I just turned cold. If she just left this painful marriage, then she would most likely did it for the same reason. I am talking about her suddenly left when you were kisisng on the couch.

    Now your ex cheated on you, it was a long time ago I know. But is it possible you are making a big deal of her last name? I am not saying it is not possible. Women have affairs too. But maybe because of your past marriage, you kind of pushing it too far this time? It's not too far for you, but it is for her.

    I am not saying you are weak, and I doubt she doesn't think you are. If she thinks you are, all you have will be one date and not several, as you had. Leo is a masculine sign. Females of this zodiac will carry some masculine traits. You might see her a bit bossy or demanding, but if you don't mean something to her, she won't ask you the questions to which you said yes and no. What's the point?

    We are always a control thing. We even control ourselves. But with the right man, this control is hardly there. You need to be able to make her loosen up. Unfortunately with her past, this is going to be very difficult. But again, I know you mean something to her, this is very clear. I have to say though, if she has quite a high position in the company, you may not be her priority. In fact, love may not be her priority after a painful marriage. Deep inside she wants to keep living and believes she deserves a man that loves her, but just when this man appears, she will struggle with her own self control and may even choose to not let her guard down.

    I have to ask, how do you feel when you are with her? as a water sign I believe you can read between the lines. Do you sense any fakeness, last name aside? Forget your past, focus on your time together. What were the vibes she sent you?

    By the way, what's up with your name? Law - dawg. Are you a cop or something? Does she know this? LOL hey just asking. Really this last name thing is kind of funny to me. Are you sure you're not planning to check on her? I didn't know last name is important for dating, I mean I never told anyone I dated either and I was single. This was long before that damn email spammers thingy. Now I am married, I only said my full name if my husband is with me or job interview or filling out forms, other than that, I gave out short name which is my first name shortened. Can you explain why it is important? Are you just suspicious, or you give yours so you want her to do the same? It sounds weird to you, I guess, but seriously I need to know.



  • I am not saying you are weak, and I doubt she doesn't think you are

    typo: I doubt she thinks you are weak

    I don't want to write too much about the chart, because her birth year may not even be real.

    and yes I only said my actual birth date (including year) in forms and if people ask

    but not all of them get the actual one



  • leoscopion: That's for the chart stuff. Sounds like caution is necessay here. Hey trust me in order to truly know a cancer you have to realize that the crab is both symbolic and real. The hard shell protect his inner core and he uses it as a protective defensive armor. Once that outer shell is pierced he is totally at the mercy of his predator. They will have sole access to his heart and he will pine for them totally. So withholding the last name is a deceptive indicator to cancer. It means that I'm not inside the first layer of her defense. She does not trust me with her physical well-being. But she trusts me with her lips??? A true cancerian would never trust his physical well being or his lips to someone he did not trust with his name. That's why cancer can't be players. They are so self-protective that they are afraid that the kiss they steal will steal their soul. Ok, enough secrets.

    hisbablove: I feeling you. There's got to be somebody else. It happened just as you said. She even seemed shocked that she had allowed it to go that far... I think the good food, the wine and the company got to her and when it got to the final point she snapped back to reality.

    She email me today to say that me email was a punch in the stomach. After she took me she was no coming to my house for xmas dinner, that she was flying to Arizona today on business, then to her kid house, then so where else and would not be back to the new year. But she said she want me to be there when she, let me see how she said it

    "My only worry is that during this time of hectic client schedule and a few minor family commitments, you won't be there when my time avails in the next few weeks.

    Please tell me my fears are unwarranted. I don't want to lose you BB.... you are just the mann for ME!!

    Then she gets mad and say it was a punch in the stomach when I replied as follows; On second thought. I can’t make that promise. After all, I joined Match so as NOT to be alone. To make a connection. I believed we had but when you look at it closely we are just circling the airport. It’s time for a landing. As, my mother use to say, “Man cannot live by bread alone”. You haven’t even given me your last name???

    So there we are. She does believe in astrology and I don't even know who she really is so I don't believe I'm compromising her.

    OH lawdawg means = attorney + UW



  • leoscopion: Thanks for the chart stuff. Sounds like caution is necessay here. Hey trust me in order to truly know a cancer you have to realize that the crab is both symbolic and real. The hard shell protect his inner core and he uses it as a protective, defensive armor. Once that outer shell is pierced he is totally at the mercy of his predator. They will have sole access to his heart and he will pine for them totally. So withholding the last name is a deceptive indicator to cancer. It means that I'm not inside the first layer of her defense. She does not trust me with her physical well-being. But she trusts me with her lips??? A true cancerian would never trust his physical well being or his lips to someone he did not trust with his name. That's why cancer can't be players. They are so self-protective that they are afraid that the kiss they steal will steal their soul. Ok, enough secrets.

    hisbablove: I feel you. There's got to be somebody else. It happened just as you said. She even seemed shocked that she had allowed it to go that far... I think the good food, the wine and the company got to her and when it got to the final point she snapped back to reality.

    She email me today to say that my email was a punch in the stomach to her. After she told me she was no coming to my house for xmas dinner, that she was flying to Arizona today on business, then to her kid house, then somewhere else and would not be back until the new year. But she said she want me to be there when she, let me see how she said it

    "My only worry is that during this time of hectic client schedule and a few minor family commitments, you won't be there when my time avails in the next few weeks.

    Please tell me my fears are unwarranted. I don't want to lose you BB.... you are just the mann for ME!!

    Then she gets mad and say it was a punch in the stomach when I replied as follows;

    " On second thought. I can’t make that promise. After all, I joined Match so as NOT to be alone. To make a connection. I believed we had but when you look at it closely we are just circling the airport. It’s time for a landing. As, my mother use to say, “Man cannot live by bread alone”. You haven’t even given me your last name???

    So there we are. She does not believe in astrology and I don't even know who she really is so I don't believe I'm compromising her.

    OH lawdawg means = attorney + UW



  • Lawdawg

    I did say the chart might not be accurate since she might not tell you her real age anyway

    it's cool if you want to use it as reference.

    but I second what you said "Cancers can't be players"

    LOL any sign any one can be player, it's not the sign, it's personality

    Lindleloo invited you to her thread

    http://www.tarot.com/forum/topic.php?id=3792&replies=277

    check it out, and tell them if Cancers can't be players

    her thread is only one among many all over the site

    "I don't want to lose you BB.... you are just the mann for ME!!"

    again, she is telling you how much you mean to her. of course your reply shocked her.

    all because of a last name?

    "A true cancerian would never trust his physical well being or his lips to someone he did not trust with his name"

    well just because you think like that, doens't mean she thinks the same.

    Anyways, I've said what I need to say about her. You decide what to do.

    I can guess what she will do, but then again, you will know that too later on anyway.



  • well just because you think like that, doesn't mean she thinks the same.

    gotta add:

    well just because you think like that, doesn't mean she thinks the same. she is not Cancer, she won't think or act like one. why should she?

    good luck.



  • Yeah, but you're evading the point that withholding her last name after making out is NOT normal. Ok, Cancer can be conservative, but if you're withholding you last name after making out what exactly are you protecting? If I was going to physically harm her, I already had the opportunity. It was going to emotionally harm her then I don't need her name. So the only reason to withhold the name is to harm ME!



  • lawdawg

    If you so believe it, then nothing else I can say

    I did ask how do you feel when you were with her. do you feel she is fake of some sort?

    you never replied to that.



  • trust what you feel. Cancers are good with intuition, emotions - things I'm not good at. good luck.

    Happy holidays to everyone

    from me and my dear Capricorn hubby

    hope only the best for you all in 2010



  • No never. She is very genuine. Down to earth and seemingly honest. The only thing that causes my intuitive hair to flicker is the way she handled herself when she's not with me.

    Typically, we would meet. Hit it off. Have a great date. This only has occured on weekends. Never meet during the week. When the week starts, I would still feel the weekend sparks so i would write an email to her thanking her for the time ect... She may answer the email two days later graciously. I would reply with other emails that would she would not respond to so I would stop after two. Then I would invite her to a weekend date which would get immediate response.

    We would meet, have a good time. She would leave. It's not that I was not satisfied with the limit ed amount of contact I had. I am busy so that's fine. I also believed in time that would change. It's the total distance when she's gone that's the problem. No sporadic communications and totally no accessibilitity. I know she says she's totally busy on business trips but I've been on business trips. That's what scares me, yet I am intrigued...



  • lawdawg

    there is your answer. "No never. She is very genuine." the first thing you wrote.

    I'll read you something I found about her:

    She has the good will to serve the community, without forgetting her own needs and glory. She is very much influenced by her root, family, children, culture. She is ambitious and serious. She will spend all the time and efforts needed to achieve her dream. She is, however, weak in senses. She is easily blinded by passion therefore commit errors that may destroy the very dream she is building. She is sensual but can be selfish and possessive, both render her conjugal life chaotic. Her success comes from hard work and driven by her desire to achieve it.

    "She is, however, weak in senses. She is easily blinded by passion"

    The couch = passion. She jumped to leave, not because she didn't want you or want to harm you. Passion had caused her sorrow in the past, she was afraid it will cause her sorrow again. But deep inside she wants you. You can see it, very clear here:

    "I don't want to lose you BB.... you are just the mann for ME!!"

    I understand your worries "No sporadic communications and totally no accessibilitity"

    This might seem like she is playing you, not communicating. But she is devoted for work, doesn't mean she is not faithful to you. If she is not, your intuition will let you know.

    About not spending time with you for Christmas, it could be her schedule, or :

    "can be selfish and possessive. "

    Maybe not a great personality. But doesn't mean she is a player. Again, if she is fake, I trust you will know.

    You are non conformist and look for freedom from all constraints. She may display emotional scenes to get her points across and you are one that shrugs it off and this will enrage her further. It takes a lot of patience and finding middle ground to make this relationship work. You do have good sense of humor, that will help a lot when dealing with her. You can find fun at work, she may not, because of her seriousness. The element she was born in, contributes to this structure. You both are intelligent and physically attractive, so in this area you are compatible. Emotionally, however, this is where you can try find middle ground.

    It's your choice though, I am only trying to help. I've never been romantic with Cancer male. I feel that they are somewhat a time bomb. Explode out of nowhere. I have temper too, but at least you don't have to guess when it will explode LOL but I do confide in them, work stuffs, and they never stab me in the back. which is cool, because I don't do it to them either.

    I hope this helps. bye now. off to bed.



  • Lawdawg,

    The woman is married. There is another man. This isn't about astrology or sun signs, though they do come into play in some aspects, this is about what you know to be true and don't want to believe.

    You said I described the scene at your house correctly. Well,my friend, the message I got was not not just about what happened at your house,it was also about what is happening in her life. Don't do this to yourself. Don't wait until your feelings are so invested that you will be faced with the fact of her true life and be too far in to walk away until your heart is broken.

    Please think about this and accept the message you have been given for your own good.

    Blessings and Light