Scorpio and Libra
Thanks Librasrise. He wants my attention huh? He has pretty much of it. But the man runs around the planet like he is having a marathon all by himself. If I do manage to get him to “stand still” it's for like uhmmm an hour maybe and then zooffffff. Only time I do see him calm is when I am next to him otherwise….nope.
He has echoed part of what all you have been explaining to me about being quick in moving on when he loses interest. But hurried to say that he find that I am a great person and he likes me. Then we both asked each other what we wanted from each other then we both said nothing. Basically we both were waiting for the other to say more but didn’t.
So to answer your question LibrasLair… we both have that chicken skin on. I told him me makes me laugh and I appreciate that in a man that can do that amongst other things. He gave a pep talk about another issue he noticed that is bothering me. He is crazy….his reply for me wanting to know him….. “It takes a life time to know someone…I might be dead tomorrow so how do you want to do that?” Iol I replied: Well I was counting on you being around for a bit. Then we both giggled.
I have to take his word for now that all of the vices are under control. Time will tell if he has been truthful. He already noticed that I am not a fan of any of it. Alcohol I only use when I am baking or cooking and a glass of rose on a hot summer afternoon.
Well I am glad that you laid it out for him about the vices. That way he understands but did you tell him that you won't put up with those real negative ones? I think as long as the two of you keep the other one laughing it's the most important thing. I think you may misunderstand him closing up on you. He may be thinking about work stuff and is probably a little angry that he can't plan anything with you because of work demanding his attention. And on the phone he may have someone standing within ear shot. And don't worry about that cake I would still give it to him. Even if you would need to drop it off at work in a box so that no one knows what it is. But tell him it's fragile and has to be held just so and not tipped in anyway. Make it mysterious. Keep it up.
Hey Libraslair, as you say, no need for apologies. I know I need to let go but I feel some responsibility for him even though I shouldn't. I also didn't mention that his drinking caused most of our problems, but also gave him the courage to get in touch again, because he was far too scared of what my reaction would be to do it sober! There are major insecurities there.I was brought up with an alcoholic father, so drink problem was something I could relate to. Maybe I was looking for someone to look after? Something I know I am good at.! lol. I was married to an Aquarian, someone I should have been compatible with and at the beginning it was fine. His indifference and coldness (and fact I was never treated like more than a housekeeper/mother to his children) drove me away. We rarely went out as a couple and didn't see the bedroom at the same time for nearly six years. I think I liked the passion S displayed, I hadn't seen it for so long. I know I should run, and to be honest I could give up more easily if he met someone else - a kind of handover.ha ha. But for all his bluster, I don't think he is even looking. What will be will be - I'm just waiting for the next episode to begin.lol.
Thanks for your support. I really appreciate it. xx
Lolpet I wish you much luck. How ever I have decided not to let someone back into my life who drinks on a regular basis. I never saw any good that came from a bottle and hated having to live with people who drink more than occasionally and not to an extent that they don't quit till they are drunk. But I don't expect others to do what I do. I broke the chain of abuse from them. Father, husbands and yes even kids. Done and I ask guys that I meet how often they drink and I am even leary of those who drink every week. A sure sign for me is if they don't go out to eat some place if they don't serve alcohol. Yes this does make a world of difference to some and while you hang in there with this man your not going to find someone who respects you and doesn't put his addiction before you. I learned that people with addictions aren't able to love anyone including their selves more than there drug of choice. And all of my loving them didn't help either of us. Much love for you in your life really.
LibrasLair; I am a Libra woman, Leo Rising, Taurus Moon - my man is Scorpio, Leo Rising, Leo Moon. We are both very strong and stubborn personalities; however, However, we are very fortunate because he has four planets in Libra and I have four planets in Scorpio. Therefore, we strike a great balance. The most important thing in any relationship is HONESTY and, of course, GREAT SEX. We have this and so much more. My son is also a Scorpio and my Pit Bull is also a Scorpio and they are both very possessive of me. I understand your dilemma. All relationships take hard work, if you are not constantly working to balance your relationship by giving and taking, you will not progress. Sometimes, you may have to give more but the more you give the more will come back to you. So, if you truly are in love with this man you must be able to trust each other completely. HONESTY is the key. In my case, we were married 14 years ago; however, I divorced him because at the time it was toxic (drugs, ex's, etc.). Now we are back together and both have followed similiar paths. We both are off the drugs and have become healthy by going to the gym regularly. It took all of these years for me to finally get in touch with him (he moved to another state to get away-he was really broken up when I divorced him. Now that I have reached out, it is THE BEST EVER. We both still have butterflies and are so madly in love and are now doing constructive things in our lives. RIGHT NOW I AM SO HAPPY AND I HOPE THAT YOU CAN ALSO FIND THE HAPPINESS THAT YOU DESERVE. Remember honesty and constantly working on change will lead you in the right direction. Best of luck to you.
CVRYDER your talking to the wrong Libra you mean Lolpet. I don't have any men on my plate right now thank you anyway. Lolpet is the one with the guy.
LibrasLair – I am sure we will have a conversation about this once again. I don’t smoke, hardly drink and do don’t any of those things. My high it’s mostly of goodtime and a good giggle. I understand that his attention is all over the place but it’s hard when you just want to hear his voice. Just plain annoying. Once again you and I are thinking amongst the same lines.:-) I am gonna make him the cake and bring it next week. Went out today looking for the cashmere socks....didn’t run into them yet. Saw some other wool/cotton pairs quite nice.
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Girl... you can't believe how right you are. He works for himself within the health club and has another practice and tries everyday to make time for his music. He is also a musician (drummer). He has some gigs today and tomorrow. For tomorrow he was looking for a replacement but that didn't work out. For his first profession therapist he can be called in anytime of the daytime everywhere in the country. Since there a little of them specialized like him. He also do holistic work. I can't explain much about this because I haven't seen him in action. But i do know he "reads" vibrations in your body. I don't know everything he does but this is just about it. Perhaps he is doing more.. I don't know for sure. Ah yeah..he also teaches martial arts but haven't been doing that lately.
sighs Even I get tired writing this all down. I found a shop on the web that has an actual adress I will be checking it out one of these days.
You know what now that you have talked more about what he does. I wouldn't let this one get away. I am looking for someone just like that in my life because once you have had someone you can talk to about your beliefs and what you do. There is a freedom there like no other. You will learn so much that you just soak it in like a sponge and you will open up much more with him to guide you. He should enjoy watching you bloom. And I mean it you will be happy you did.
I hear you loud and clear. He has been saying something similar from the begining but I was looking at him like. Who are you?. I hope things work out and that I don't get any surprises that I am not in for. He knows I am sensitive so I hope he knows what he is doing with me. I do want to keep him in my life ..but this dude needs to slow down somewhere..
You can give him the reason to slow down. That burning the candle at both ends is taking it's toll on him. Do you see now why he indulged? Not an excuse for me but he could de-stress other ways. Like the health club or in very good company. Book some time with him use a fictitious name. Wear a wig and see if he will do some work on you and come prepared to lock he door and give him a massage. How wicked can you get?
Mega big grin How wicked can I get??? Challenge??? Hmmmm....
As I said before I don't want to scare the man away…. When I get creative I normally feel sorry for the victim......hahahahaha. And to be honest they always stick around after seeing how crazy I can be. So that’s why I am very selective in who gets a taste of that.
Last time that I went to see him, he was already loss for words when I showed up all in red and my hair was in a different style than when he was accustomed of.
Booking him is tricky since he uses a direct number for booking and nothing through the health club. Got to think this one through because unknown or private numbers he doesn’t always respond to.
My cousin which is one of his best friends calls me to get him. So does my aunt that is also a client of his. Don’t know why they figure I get him...but yes he does respond to my calls when he did have more time. I have been paying attention to these automatic shifts but just kept observing.
This unspoken “relationship” started a while ago and during that time I was figuring myself out. I used to joke around with him about being his secretary... I told him I would like to get paid though. You can imagine what kind of pay check was suggested.
We will see what happens these coming days.
Hey guys, I live in Northern California but am vacationing in Southeast Asia right now.
Lolpet, man 5 years on a roller coaster ride? You have some stamina!! But yes, I think Libras seriously do, if anyone's going to withstand the drama for true love, a Libra is.
Flowsco! Yeah, again, I'm not saying are actually selfish or egotistical, more that there's a potential to swing one way or the other, and also, that the Libra you are with may see it that way, know what I mean? I think in our society also, men and women see it as "selfish" to focus on yourself alone, even if the reason you are doing so is justified. And I will just say don't forget to come back to the world, even if it's scary, and don't hide your light because it's easier and safer. The longer you do it, the harder it is to change later.
I hear you re: men not knowing what to do with you. I'm in the same boat. You are just too awesome for them. Sorry about the weak wimpy Italian. Let's hope Libra man is more of a man who's willing to stand up beside you and be as strong and tough as you in love, a real equal partnership! He's a Libra so, that shouldn't be hard.
Vice - yeah, he may have dark skeletons. Some Libras also bury them deeper because as a Libra you want to pretend nothing's wrong and you are happy, to make others happy, and to minimize the drama you create in the world. You don't want to be "the problem" or admit that you have "problems." You want to help others with THEIR problems and support them with their issues, but not need that type of help. But we're human and NOT above the skeletons at all.
Yeah I think most Libras like sweet stuff. Lol. And partying ... whether it means drinking or other things ... self control is something it's hard for us to apply. We need people with strong morals and discipline around us to keep us on the straight and narrow. Or things we really care about to wake us up (like a serious goal or a marriage, or children, or a new job, etc.)
My weakness is actually pastries. Heheh, I can drink with the best of them but it's not something I chase or do all the time to escape... I do that with yummy sweet chewy bready moist paaaastriiiiiesss .... mmmm.
LibrasLair is def a wise woman I have been having fun reading and learning from your posts!
Flowsco - jealousy ... this is a bit weird to say, but Libras I mentioned are vain. Sometimes we get this little childish thing - very tiny - where we mildly resent someone having a "one-up" on us. It can manifest in weird ways. Some more noticeable, some tiny. Example - if you go to a store with a friend and she finds the perfect dress and you can't find anything you like to wear. Or you both book airplane tickets to the same place but hers is cheaper on a better airline or a better route than yours. We get the little jealousy monster. But most Libras are so chill we hide that little flash of envy. Sometimes we comment on it but usually in good fun and it means no big deal.
To be jealous of a lover ... in your case I think he's a bit intimidated/jealous of your success/independence. Remember, he's a Libra. He wants you dependent on his romantic, balanced, wise, loving, personal secret, private shangri-lah ways. At the same time he is in love with a career woman who doesn't actually NEED him. So there's a tiny teeny flash of jealousy/hurt there cuz he knows that you don't NEED him. But he wants you to. Which every man or woman wants of their partner but in a Libra we're acutely aware of it. We want you addicted to us. We want to skillfully weave a web you can't even see that keeps you totally wrapped up in our world and not wanting or even dreaming of leaving it.
We'd never say that of course. That's something a possessive Scorpio would say. The difference here being, we want to wave a fantasy around you that makes you CHOOSE to stay, but you can leave at any time, we don't restrict or chase you. We're just so skilled you're totally mesmerized. A Scorpio would lock you up and browbeat you or make sad death cries if you tried to leave. (Totally kidding! sorta, hahaha)
Agree with Librasrise, she is right - the Libra is vain, so, you've got to give him the attention that makes him feel secure and loved and therefore he won't doubt and won't be jealous of you/your perceived ability to just "leave without a care.) Because clearly he's gone out on limbs for you, so he's jealous of that "lack of dependence" when he probably feels more attached to you right now than he perceives you to be to him.
Lolpet re: your guy and the breaks and how he's your addiction - I agree. Part of me is afraid of what will happen when I really fall in love again, because Libras love love ... because all of the sweeping emotion. It can definitely be a dangerous addiction. You can only get out when you're really ready to be out. Just be careful not to lose yourself so completely you look back one day and wonder why you spent it focused on someone else's happiness, and not on yours.
Flowsco - good to let him know re: the vices ahead of time. You don't want to go down that road only to discover he's got major drama/baggage while you're trying to clean up and manage your own. But let's hope, again, that he's got things under control! You guys are cute, still in the awkward little kid stage with your hopeful unfinished statements and things unsaid and hoped for and chemistry. MUAHAHAH!
Also about "how wicked can you get" - don't feel sorry for the victim. Remember, Libras are ruled by Venus and LOVE to play. As long as you make it clear you respect him, his job, etc, and take caution, all the games you play will make him need and love you more and more. This is going to sound weird but the more devious - but genuinely goodhearted, not evil or manipulative - you are, the more we admire and are turned on by you.
But you're right don't show him that side of you just yet. If anything this side of you is the very Scorpio dark-side-in-the-bedroom that makes these Libras get all addicted and star-crossed like Lolpet and others. You love dark hard and deep. We like to be loved dark hard and deep. But we get skittish if the love is too restrictive or demanding/controlling. But if you find a balance ... dude. We are yours forever.
Hahahaha.. I saw that you was online and hung around a bit. I will come back and reply later. Oh Gosh.....hahahahaha
Flowsco I have no doubt you can scare the crop out of a Libra but only at first. Yeah ease into the other stuff. Ok so you can't get an appointment the other way so call from your phone and talk in an accent even if it's bad. Cause he will be smiling. And still this is only foreplay. Your not going to get down to business yet. Your going to leave him wanting more. Curiosity killed that cat. I don't doubt your a very wicked one. I have a girlfriend who took me into an adult toy store and before I walked threw the front door I looked to see if there were and cars going by just in case so nobody would see me going in. LOL OMG then she walks up to the counter and asks for something that looks like a part for my vacuum cleaner, I know you know what I mean. I thought I would die when her and the guy behind the counter discussed his favorite one. Well what do you want I grew up in California but I was very sheltered as a kid and my first marriage was straight from home to a 16 yr. marriage that I had nothing else to compare to life that was not a satisfying romp. So yes the store left me red faced and when I tried to go out the back door my girlfriend said stop that's not the way out. It's to the peep shows. I had to have that explained to me too. Stop laughing I know but it was the 80's and I was a little behind everyone else but only for a while. LOL
I see Librarise you finally got some answers. Well at least two were men. And I know a few Scorpio women and none I repeat none are stingy and the one's I know won't sting unless cornered and that's a fact. But I react that way myself. I must be too close the the sign. I say where the Scorpio when angry will cut you with a knife I have a sharp tongue and I will cut you to pieces with it. But I have to be very very angry to go for the jugular. I have been close friends with everyone of them and I could rely on them more than some of the others that are into me me me we all know women like that and men too for that matter. To scold you for saying I want to know was uncalled for. You wouldn't say we when you want to know how your boyfriend thinks. I guess you could have said WE women who love Scorpio men may have made him happier but I wouldn't have thought of it either and I use we all the time.
OMG LibrasLair...you killed me with that one!!!! I am doubting now if I should tell you a story about those vacuum cleaners!!!! OMG hahahaha Well it involves old and new and the media...LOL. Oh my... my dinner just went through my stomach down to.......... LOL I think if you come over here...you gonna be red ALLLLLLLLL the time when I am done with you.....LOL
Flowsco that was in the 80's that's not now! I know some people aren't ready for what comes out of my mouth sometimes but I may be old enough to be a grandmother but am not one and don't think like some little white haired lady (I use the term loosely, no lady here) with an apron on. NO not happening. Goodness I hope you didn't choke on that. I knew you would get a good laugh out of that. Remember I grew up in California. Not Texas. Didn't come to Tx. till 05'. Did you miss the part where I said I have been married 4 times? One reason I would draw out getting my divorce to 2 of them was so I wouldn't get talked into it again. I wasn't going to get married again after he 3 one cause I said hey I am a three time looser and I am not doing it again. So after living with the guy for 6 years i finally said well if we're not going to get married then I am wasting my time. And he said your the one who said you weren't going to get married again and I said I know what I said, but I think after 6 yrs. I think I can trust you now. A lot I knew. Do as I say not as I do.