Scorpio and Libra
I copied and pasted and reread everything.
Before getting into all of what I thought about last night I finally got a compatibility analysis from The Captain and I want to share this with you. My DOB is 18-11-67 and his 19-10-53
Flowsco, this combination, like wine, often gets better over time. There is a limit, however, to how long its mat¬uration will go on if it gets too little attention—the relationship has a tendency to stagnate, and then to start fraying around the edges. It needs care and hard work to keep moving in the right direction. You two have an innate talent for tending to your relationships, but unfortunately, in this case, you can be blind-sided and may just leave this one alone. To survive, then, the relationship needs good diagnosticians, and, indeed, the matchup's focus is often the understanding of its own mechanics.
Love affairs and marriages usually find you taking an all-consuming interest in each other. This is not the same thing, of course, as paying attention to the relationship itself, which may be sorely in need. You can get obsessive about each other, perhaps even jealous and controlling, without realizing that this behavior itself may loosen the relationship's bonds rather than strengthen them. Learning to back off, give each other space, and work objectively on improving the relationship, much as one would prune and culti¬vate a plant, will produce noticeable drops in tension and forestall problems. As friends, your partner can give you excellent advice and you, in turn, can supply important lessons in how to build willpower and consistency. Should you two have met as students, you will probably be absorbed and unit¬ed more by a common interest, as the years pass, than by your personal feelings for each other. ADVICE: Don't take things for granted. Regular maintenance is needed. Things won't get better by themselves. Be your own best diagnostician.
Flowsco, expanding your horizons and charging into uncharted territory does not come easily to you. You are worldly and self-confident but you are not that adventurous. You have considerable charisma and can inspire others but you must set aside a tendency to be selfish or egotistical, and learn to relate to others more intimately. Complacency can be a stumbling block for you. Well-organised, efficient, and generally sensitive to others' needs, you can use your social talents to go far. But don't use your charm as manipulation. Exploring the depth of the human psyche or other inner worlds can bring you much satisfaction. Release the need to do everything yourself and find the joy of learning through exploration and discovery.
Your partner may grapple with a need to retreat that often manifests as depression. However much dynamism and charisma he may have, it doesn't mean he should have a sense of entitlement or believe he deserves an award just for showing up. He must release hurts, slights, and rivalries in order to follow through on his ideas, inspirations, and considerable powers of observation. His high-voltage personality might find refuge in addictions or substance abuse as he tries to calm himself down. He must find constructive outlets for his amazing energy so that he can have a lasting impact on the world, especially in the realms of art and culture. His fulfillment will come when the world turns its attention to him
This is uncanningly correct especially the part of me and him individually. On my part I have not ever been selfish or egotistical due to my upbringing but the rest is correct. On his part wauw. All true and most of it he has been through already (the dark secrets thmilin).
What a very interesting 48 hours here on the forum!!
Librarise -- yes indeed and I am gratefull for all the time and effort you, LibrasLair and thmilin all put into expaining Libra's and my situation in particular. LibrasLair started introducing me to the interesting and exiting world of Libra's and I have learned a great deal from that but this thread is mindblowing to me. I hope you don't mind by me commenting in your thread made the focus the other way around in the two signs.
I could get into how Scorpio's are but I know I couldn't be fair due to the bad taste I have in my mouth with my ex. My brother is a Scorpio and he is sooooooo different but I only know him as a brother and not a man ;-). My uncle is a Scorpio and he remained single his whole life (he is now 68) and no kids. My father was a Scorpio( died when I was 9) and my step-father is a Scorpio ( haven't really lived with him). I have great admiration for my uncle and found memories of my father.
Overall I can say if we are not insecure of you on any level we are yours for life. But we are also in general slow in processing things. lol It isn't always handy. Some Scorpio's need to grow up and if they don't realize they need to do this to develop they can hinder you if you are more light on your feet than they are.
Personally I think it's always best to be on your own for a while. Get to know you and then engage into a relationship of any kind. I find for Scorpio's its mandatory. Clean up the personal mess first!!
I love that you got the confirmation from the Captain that we have already told you. So you should do fine if you follow all this wisdom. I have faith in you since you went so far to understand who your dealing with. Now he may be like my son whose birthday is Sept. 30th. He loves an adrenaline rush. So he runs his vehicle off road where it's his truck that he slowly drove onto a big boulder or his quad in the desert. Speed is his high. I can honestly say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree as I have a lead foot myself. When my kids were young we went camping and ran our dune buggy in the sand at Pismo Beach and also in the desert in the winter months. So I guess we programed them. I don't get to travel cause I don't have the finances so my adventures are moving into a new place and making it look much better than when I moved in. And I am satified with that. But I really want to go dig for crystals and that will let me use my 4x4 and really put me back in the adventure that I love. Keep all of these secrets that we shared with you and shhhhhhhhhhhhhh don't tell anyone ok?
I hear you ..But I am thinking maybe ......just maybe I can get some insight from the MaLe ScorPions born in the last part of November ....I am counting on them having enough compassion to maybe try to explain just a little more in depth that pain they feel that is hard for them to put out in the forefront for fear that someone would take advantage...I truly believe that this is mainly dealing with the gentlemen born like I said in the last week/part of that sign. It would help me to understand a great deal. I love him.
You are a beautiful spirit blessed with a true Librans sense of humor lol!!!
Thank you I was a tomboy all of my life and I can't say that everyone is like that. Because I know too many who are clothes hounds and just so lady like that I want to say oh gag me with a spoon. But you know it could be from many other things that make them that prissy. Doesn't mean you can't love them too but it's just not me. I do my hair and I am very vain about that. So you know when chemo made my hair fall out I cried and just thinking about that I cry even now. But when I got used to it I said what the fork do I care give me that ball cap and lets go! So we are so resilient too. And that's saying something for someone who never wore hats and loves to have the wind blowing threw their hair. One reason I didn't want the helmet law to pass in Calif. Love being on the back of the bike and flippin off rude drivers. Yes I do that.
And your not the first to say I don't believe she said that.
ladies! yes this is a fun thread!
Librasrise I hope some Scorpio's hop in for you ... what I might also recommend is maybe that you create a new thread specifically titled and asking for Scorpio men to comment because there are so many threads to go through. Also your original post didn't really make it clear that you wanted them to comment, it seemed an open request for any input about the Libra female/Scorpio fit and why you're going through what you're going through and how to make your Scorpio happy. So a Scorpio may have just read it and moved on not realizing what you needed input on.
Flowsco - great reading! Ok, going to try and be diplomatic (Libra trait!) about this, but, when the text says "selfish and egotistical" note that "putting yourself first and foremost" can sometimes cross a line, even when we don't mean it to. I'm not saying you are selfish or egotistical, but I am saying that, as you yourself have described, that you may be very used to doing things your way, alone. I am there, and I'm a Libra, but this is what leads to the complacency and can also lead to being selfish. Ie, you enjoy your independence, freedom, not having to deal with someone else's drama or invasion of your personal space and feelings, so much, you don't want to give it up. You don't want to be vulnerable and give yourself up.
Heard the saying that it's a crime to not share your talent with the world (said to great artists who maybe hide or doubt their talent)? In a way it's also saying, it is selfish as a human being to lock yourself away from others. We all do it, to some extent, but some do it more than others. Doing it too much makes you just as selfish as the attention hog who puts themselves out in the limelight with people all the time.
There's a balance - we have to push ourselves to be social and share ourselves and give ourselves to others and risk embarrasment and mistakes and open up and laugh at ourselves. If we put ourselves out of "danger" we also put ourselves, in a way, "above life" because we are deliberately separating ourselves from sharing and enjoying moments with others.
Re: the addiction four your Libra - Libras can be very lazy and we do indeed have addictive personalities. It's because we like to enjoy ourselves and we sometimes/often lack a "self control" drive that others (lilke Virgos) would have. Libras always have a vice. Some of them are less harmful, some of them more, but we always have one. Mine is food. We can minimize the addiction level or the vice if we have certain planetary placements or parents and family who establish healthy, wholesome habits in our lives young.
But as an example, my father was a stern military man who was on my butt all the time about food, from age 6. Despite all his pressure and drilling, I am still addicted to food, so even family conditioning might not be able to overcome the tendencies in a Libra. Note that every person is different and of course your Libra has shared some deep darfk secrets with you already and may have already shared what his vice is. If he hasn't he has probably already shared with you the root causes of whatever his vice is. Let's hope it's something minor!
LibrasLair, re: prissy Libras - I walk the line of tomboy and prissy. I grew up with men and no women to teach me how to be a girl, dress up, and primp, so I effectlyely behaved emotionally and socially like a boy, and dressed like one until I was 23. Then I was independent for a while and started experimenting with being a girl - going out, dressing up, makeup, etc.
Now, I don't chase labels or material things but I DO like style and dressing well. Then again I don't like blowing wads of cash on my clothes. So I try to dress well and according to my personal quirky style but for reasonable prices. I also don't believe in impractical clothing - if the shoes hurt, don't wear them. If the heels impede your walk, don't wear them!
I'm lazy so I don't like to get dirty and then have to clean up. But if something needs to get done, I'll dig in, get dirty, and just do it. Particularly if it's for something important to me, like decorating/designing my home, like you like to do.
So I hear you - I think some Libras just have some other things going on and also personal upbringing that may cause them to be a certain way, prissy or tomboyish!
I have posted on a few discussions about myself, 6th October, and my Scorpio 02/11/09. Libraslair, I received some very good advice from you way back. Listen to this lady, folks - she is soooo wise!!! The thing with myself and S is that once I made that commitment to him, let him beyond the barriers, I couldn't let go. I have been on a seesaw for over 5 years, on and off and can see much of what is going on with us on this discussion. I don't know how to get him out from under my skin. If I am being honest though, I am not sure that I want to.lol. He has shown me depths I never knew, so I suppose I have learnt and grown from the relationship. We are currently off.AGAIN!! I know he has some growing up to do, but as he is 40 already, am not sure if that will ever happen. However, I intend to persevere. I married an Aquarius nearly 20 years ago, and never felt in all the years we were together, how I feel about S. It may be a struggle, but life is never dull.
Librasrise and Flowsoco, I wish you luck. When its good, its really good, but us lIbrans are resilient enough to pull through the bad too. -) xx
Lolpet I appreciate your giving me so much credit but I a sure you thmilin lays it out there in words that I love to read. Your on again off again could bite you in the arce. You wouldn't get away pushing the female Scorpio like that. And ok look at the child in yourself, it's not one sided in any relationship. If you want to keep him you might want to rethink some of this as we try to be fair to both sides and even tho we want to be perfect and no one can be more critical of us than we are on ourselves but our opinions are just that and sometimes they stink. You were attracted to him the way he was at the time. So when you start trying to change someone go look in the mirror first. If you don't like someone doing it to you then you understand the other side. And yes food is also my problem but I do know some that over indulge in alcohol and drugs. My father Sept. 25 alcholic and so was his father and you know they blame that on the genes. I say you have choices. And it never was mine. And aren't we lovable?
thmilin what is your location if you don't mind my asking?
Oh my..a girl steps out for a bit …and everybody get writing..lol.
LibrasLair – I do have to get rid of the chicken suite..lol. I will get there. Sounds like fun hanging out with you. I adventurous like that. Lips are sealed on this side..(hmm Scorpio trademark hahaha)
I was a half a tombboy also when I was a kid. Loved dressing up when I had a party but when home I always played with the boys in the neighbourhood. Always exploring. Drove my mom bonkers. She would come home and I wouldn’t be in. After some investigating I would be a couple of blocks by some relative. Sundays were terrible. She would of send me off to go to church and I would end up at my brothers house fixing cars!! Or end up at the movie theater with my dad. Hmmm the good old days.
Now I have my moments where I do dress up and be all glam but don’t have a problem hanging out in a t-shirt and some shorts.. Only thing is I get myself into trouble when I do that…lol.
I never drove a bike. Scared of the thing. To much freak accidents happens here with bikers.
Librasrise – I agree with thmilin perhaps a dedicated thread for the Scorpio men. There is one for the Libra male where eventually we got a good feedback from a guy.
Thmilin – what can I say. You a talented writer and observer. Looking at how you layed it out ..uhmm yeah I might be a bit selfish and egotistical but this is something of the last few years that I have been single. But it doesn’t apply to my interaction with others. The thing is with men is that the get intrigued, chase me and if I do bite they don’t know what to do with me. I was interested in a Leo ( he is living in Italy) and we tried the long distance thing. Very romantic guy but oooooh drove me crazy. Got me all hot and…. but didn’t dare to travel to meet. I was unable due to health issues. Eventually I called it quits. You wouldn’t believe all the excuses and lack of back bone this man had. Long story. After that I decided to work on me and clean my mess up. Took me 9 years to heal from my ex and the Italian happend in the middle of that process.
You know that Libraguy and I had a chat last night again..second night in a row..hihi and he did share more and it was like dejavu when I read what Captain posted. And now what you and thmilin wrote about food and other possible addiction are right on point once again.
Vice is known and I think I also know the root causes of the vice. One root cause he mentioned yesterday was his dad being an alcoholic and so he doesn’t drink but he did indulge in other “happy drugs”. He said his mantra was to be happy everyday but listening to him I make out that he is still angry eventhough he says he is not. I hardly could of put my two cents into that conversation. But I also found out that he loves food a sweet tooth man!! He mentioned cake. Jeezzz there goes my surprise.
LOL@ Lolpet. Thanks for the wellwishes. I think I am gonna need it after talking to him last night. The guy is intense wow. And LibrasLair is indeed a wise woman. But as she said thmilin lays it out so very clear.
Oh thmilin ...I do have one question. You mentioned that he is jealous of me. Any idea for what? I mean we have similar background so I wouldn't know what it could be. With my ex I know it was knowledge and me light on my feet compared to him amongst other things. And that became an issue.
He did stop with the "happy drugs" and now only smokes.
HI thmilin JUST GOT BACK FROM A MANNY AND PEDDY LOL!
I too was and still is at heart a tomboy and have no regrets......tomboys are actually very sexy and only reveal that to the man that has their heart :)...I like that about me! ...... I am going to take you up on that suggestion right now as a matter of fact in regards to the scorpio forum. Also the thing about libras is when we write we are actually talking which makes it easier for us as well as the reader to communicate and makes it easier to respond to (it's a natural art for us ) .
Flowsco I'm thinking that he is not jealous of you per se ; I think that he just wants you to follow his lead (he is a leader you know)....he wants to control the moves don't forget he is a man and Libra is a masculine/cardinal sign...and it shows in the male and female ....it really really shows in the male ..true story! He wants your attention...give it to him and he will calm right down; he will begin to feel secure and relaxed enough to start the journey that is destined for you. Check it we love beauty and the difference between the male and female librans are the canvasses ...meaning to us (female librans) the world is our canvass and to them ( male librans) the canvass is themselves . So focus on him and then he'll turn his focus on you and what you want.
Librarise do I say do ya, do ya think you got your point across that you only want Scorpio I say only Scorpio MEN? All that's missing are the flashing lights! LOL I think you may get some attention from that. And come on Libra men are into beauty and most of the time it has to do with out of doors. Or their toys. A beautiful landscape or sunset or sunrise. And Libras work well as a couple in a give and take too. They will listen to your ideas so don't scare her. And what was that suit a chicken suit, yours or his? Yeah the drug scene wasn't my thing or the drinking. People think I am drunk the way I carry on and I haven't had a drop to drink. You see I can make an arse out of myself without it. And it's ok as long as I am the one who brings the attention to me. But if someone else does it and I am not controlling it I am uncomfortable. And that's the only time you will see me blush.
I agree that thmilin seems to know us inside out, but give yourself some credit too.lol.
I think my whole problem with S was that I didn't ever try to change him, I bent so far backwards for him I met myself on the way back. I tolerated behaviour I would never have considered in the past (or would have advised my friends to run from) for a long time. I did mention to him how his behaviour impacted on me, but at no time did I ask him to change. I believe that a person has to want to change and that it can't be imposed upon them. But eventually I discovered that it didn't matter how much I loved him, how much I did for him to show I loved him, he would always go his own sweet way anyway, and I would just have to deal with that. I relinquished all control to him and was happy to do so, it made him happy and he always dictated what happened in the relationship. Every break has been instigated by him. I am not a doormat by any means where anyone else is concerned, only him. Where I do dig my heels in (childish I know!) is when the break comes, I do not give in and make first contact. I have some self respect, and wont allow myself to be where I am not wanted no matter how much it hurts, or how much I want to contact him. Eventually he contacts me to tell me he misses me, loves me etc. He knows that I won't have given up on him, that I won't turn him away. Even his father has said in the past that he doesn't think S will ever settle down although he has proposed to me and is always saying how much he wants to change his life and settle down. Who knows?
Maybe this time he won't come back. I don't know. I often wish I hadn't met him as he has turned my life upside down, but the next minute I will be thanking my lucky stars I did. Life han't been dull with S around, I probably need the breaks to find my balance again!!!
Something has to give. I am normally so sane, so rational. Honestly!!!! Just not where this particular Scorpio is concerned. I wish I had a crystal ball to see where my future lies. If I knew it wasn't with him I could accept it and move on, but for now am holding on for something I may never get.
I think HE is my vice, my unhealthy obsession. Chocolate would be so much easier. At least you can go to diet classes for help to give that up!
I'm sorry for harping on, I'm even boring myself now. Time to go. Love and light.:-) xx
WAIT you don't have to be sorry for anything you have said on here. And you really left out some extremely important information. And I don't think I would take his fickle arce back. Remember the words Dr. Phil always says. People treat you the way you allow them to treat you. Did ya hear that. You didn't say anything about him wanting you around on his terms. NO NO NO. You know I begged a guy once I lived with for two years not to leave. Guess what? Never ever ever will I do that again. Another lying dog. He was an alcoholic but the funny (and not ha ha) thing I didn't know it because I never saw him sober. Believe it or not. He was a lineman for he county. Really has nothing to do with the song. And I learned those guys drink all day long. Ya know the big orange water jugs? Right not wattttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr in those jugs. But he found a drinking partner and he married her. Boy I learned my lesson. No and I guess your enough different than me that if he has done this very many times I wouldn't keep playing the game. He must be pretty smug if he thinks you will always let him back into your life. And you know what if I were to go back, it would only be to give him a taste of his own medicine cause what's good for the gander is absolutely good for the goose. I am so sorry that I said something about changing him but I don't think it will happen. And I sure wouldn't waste anymore of my life waiting for him to. No absolutley run as far and fast and don't look back. Cause by letting him back in looks like you are a doormat. Sorry darlin my opinion. But I have too much experience with men to tell you to hope he will grow up.
Lolpet go to the thread Ideal Partner. And tell the Captain whether you want this partner for marriage of just as a compatible lover. She figures it differently for each she said. Then give your birth date. Says that's all she needs and doesn't need the year. Then she give you the signs and their birthday week. You already know your going to get Gemini and Aquarius cause they are air signs and she will include Libra. I think she will put in fire signs to I need to go and look again myself cause I asked her a question. I don't know why she does this without other pertinent information like the year and time and place of your birth but she doesn't.
I am trying to get a hold of the lights as we speak lol!!
I belive that I did speak of partnership and libras in a different way thats all , Flowsco baby I am not trying to scare you ok pookie!! lol