Anther Cancer Thread... for your help in understanding them

  • I keep seeing all these posts about us Cancers, mostly the men and I want to try and help out.

    Me: female

    Sun in Cancer

    Rising sign of Sagittarius

    Moon in Aquarius

    Venus and Mars in Virgo

    I am somewhat of a typical cancer, except for certain issues.

    I want to clarify some things about cancers as I have been reading these posts and we seem to get a bad rap

    First off, when we love, we love deeply, unconditionally, we will fight to the bitter end for the person we love, but there is only so much we will go through. If the fight becomes a burden on our heart, if it makes us negative, if we feel like a doormat, guess what, the love is there but the fight is gone. We will no longer pursue or even contact you. This goes for men and women

    A cancer is very strong but emotional. Because of these inner conflicts we tend to bottle it up, this causes us physical pain, yes you heard right, we will physically ache over our emotions whether its work, love, home, doesn't matter we will be in physical pain. I personally hold this pain in the chest and back as well as the shoulders. Until we have had time to deal with the emotions, create a solution to our problem this pain will last.

    We are stubborn, built with a tendency to think we always know what is best we don't take advice very well and often times consider it criticism. If you find a cancer taking your advice they must have the utmost respect for you.

    We disappear, this has nothing to do with you. It is strictly about ourselves and why this might seem cruel to all of you if you realized how cruel we view the world through our eyes you would understand. It's not just a matter of viewing but we feel it as well. That kid that was murdered, the people who lost their homes today, the AIDS crisis in Sudan, we feel these issues on a deep level. Our only attempt to escape the pain is to literally escape and hug it out with ourselves.

    Our emotions are confusing to us, one minute in love, the next minute not wanting to be in love because of the eventual hurt, I have not met a cancer yet who hasn't been through this, it's a defense and barrier for us, one that we struggle with and hence we disappear.

    We are very intuitive, lie to a cancer and think it was successful? think again, we pick up on it then and later dream about it and often can see the truth. Honesty is always the best policy with a cancer about anything, even if you think it will hurt them, they will respect you more for it. DONT LIE... stupid mistake, it will take you forever to rebuild trust with us.

    We are family oriented for the most part, let me just tell you. I come from a large family but have a very emotionally abusive mother. Because of her abuse our family is now split. My brother has essentially disappeared. My father is closed off. My sisters and I have been through years of counseling because of her. My other brother hung himself because of her and her abuse. I love my mother but limit all contact with her and have been the most forgiving of the children, perhaps because I am the youngest, maybe it's the cancer in me I don't know

    I want children but am scared to death to have them and repeat this abuse. I constantly strive to be a loving person, to never have a mean word, but it happens and it was learned behavior. One day I will get over this hump, hopefully soon.

    I have no man (okay maybe a XXX buddy), no children, so my career is my family so to speak. I spend countless hours obsessing over my job, how to make it better, how to gain more, how to be the top dog. This is all I have so it is my baby so to speak. Sometimes I wish I had a family of my own and want that but I'm again scared to death to have it.

    We need reassurance. Often Cancers are great at reassuring others, helping out, being the shoulder for everyone to cry on. But we rarely receive it in return which is another reason we disappear.

    We are not prudes in bed and often have amazing sexual appetites and fantasies. I won't go into details but if a cancer feels secure with you the bedroom will become your new play ground.

    We can cook, most of us. I cook sometimes just to get rid of stress. I won't even eat, but I'll cook.

    We love physical sports. I haven't met a cancer that doesn't love playing sports or doing something active. It helps us process our spinning mind.

    We are ruled by water and this is key, want your cancer to open up, get in the hot tub with them, take then to the lake, the ocean will have you wondering "where did this awesome person come from". We are easy to open up when surrounded by water. It is soothing and takes away the anxiety.

    I hope this helps and look forward to other cancers chiming in, we are confusing but you must have a strong desire, backbone, and patience to make it through to the end with us. We will continually test you and gauge your worthiness of our love.

  • PLz PLz PLz . llindieloo here I have done nothing only help my X cancer fella . Hepled with his education, Visa and gave him money when he was shint . I would like you to read my story " Have i lost my cancer bb/f for good You may have already . All I want to know is why he has stopped communicating with me when I have done nothing wrong . hope you can give me some info . Thank you .

  • Because he's not done with you. It's our way of keeping you in the hole so to speak. My advice, no contact with him at all, delete him, move on, when you stop giving him attention he will be back.

  • I may agree with the points you have. I feel they are a little on the more positive side than what most of us deal with out of our Cancers.

    I think most are manipulative, very moody, are never fully satisfied, and actually hurt the ones they love the most, are the best with trying to handle them and understanding of them in hope for finding someone better. That is not worthy of respect. Don't lie to you cancers, please, cancers do their fair share of lieing!!!

    I have also been learning from many others that they have a hard time being faithful. Will string many women along because they are so insecure, and want their cake and eat it too, nothing to be respected by me either!

    Most of you are gorgeous, but use it to play your game. Most Cancers are a train wreck waiting to happen, with nothing coming from you but how emotional and how you need to escape to be able to handle your emotions and what is going on in the world...


    I like space, and really who on earth doesn't? But, just disappearing, not calling, not texting back when you just had an incredible night and got pleased at the end??

    I'm not saying all the time, but most you were off with someone else, wrapping them up with your wit, charm, and yet totally decieving them all along. I think you will find most cancers are on the bi-polar side, decieving, cheating, expecting everything from the other person, lieing, most insecure, unhappy people you'll meet.

    This is not against you personally. This is from my own experience a little here and there, and from most of the stories that are on here from beautiful, yet hurting women that had no idea what was coming!

    my story is "Help me with this cancer man" I do not put up with most of this crap, but that's what gets him the most is that I am just as good at playing his game as he is and it drives him nuts!!

    I love it 🙂

  • wickedmoon . Nice to see you again , how have you been ?

  • I have been good! Things are going good with me, how are you doing?

    I have a very full life and this cancer man has a very seperate part in it, best that way!

    I feel if I got too wrapped up in him, I would lose control of everything, they have a way of doing that to you, you know?

  • really interesting wm

    Like I said I'm a cancer female. I do agree with your post, cancers can be very manipulative and users and abusers. Perhaps because I came from abuse I am not on this spectrum. I never said we don't lie, I said if you lie to us we know it. Not all cancers are cheats, I for one am an extremely loyal partner and expect the same. Good info though but all on the dark side. I disappear because my moodiness is negative and don't wish to bring that negativity on anyone. But I agree, the disappearing act after a night of bliss is totally unacceptable, although my cap does this. Seems more like a male trait to me. Males are just messed up to begin with.

  • Wow...this makes me sad:(

    If I may...ALL zodiacs are merely zodiacs. People are people and who WE chose to be is totally within our power. Every "sign" has strengths to be "built upon" and weaknesses to "improve upon." Character issues are a personal matter, it doesn't matter what sign you are born under. Life is about choices, choices that are within OUR control.

    I am a Cancer female and I love the skin I am in! It has challenged me and it has blessed me. It ebbs and it flows, but I would rather cut off my right arm than to hurt another individual. As I stated in another post...IT IS ABOUT KARMA, not the zodiac. What we all need to do is study our past life "karma drama" and make changes in this current life because we carry over UNHEALTHY patterns that were not properly dealt with in other incarnations. We also reconnect oftentimes with the same peolple in order to finish business and balance out karma....

    And for those who do not believe in past lives I respect that; but I can tell you that my PAST LIFE REPORT is extremely accurate and has helped me understand so much about myself, my life, my past, present, and future. I feel so empowered now!

    In addition, the sun sign is just a part of you. It is the essence of you, but there are many other components to who we are, including house and other planetery placements.

    I hope this helps...

    Much Love!

  • how do I find out about my past lives, maybe this cancer irritated me before...

  • wickedmoon

    You hit the nail right on the head especially Cancer Men. Lying , cheating and off living in his own little world of his own creation. Never mind anyone else or their needs. Thanks for the truth!

  • @Mooninsag, interesting post. I think a lot of people who are struggling with trying to understand their Cancers will come here and get a nice overview of this sign. There are sooo many threads on Cancers, but I think people probably get tired of going through the hundreds of older posts on them; to me, it can be overwhelming. seems to be dominated by women and it would be really nice if there was a cancer male who could chime in on this! But as a cancer female I'm quite sure your summary goes for both sexes in most cases.

    I'm very close with a family member who is a Cancer and I agree with a lot of what you said. They are very caring, love being around family and often try to make people feel comfortable and understood. However, the Cancer I am close to has had a history of being involved in tumultuous relationships of all kinds, and I think for this reason she has trust issues. One minute she's in love, the next she's not sure if the guy is the right one. Also, like you said, she can sense bullsh*t and has had predictive and telling dreams that I've seen come true! A little scary, lol. I'm not sure I've heard of her disappearing on her guys like so many Cancer men seem to do to the women on these forums, but I have yet to hear of her completely putting her trust in another individual besides close family, like myself.

    @Atirro42, don't be sad. For me, a lot of these traits that we see in Cancers (and that they themelves claim to have) I don't agree with, and I don't think are entirely justifiable because to me--a Virgo--they don't make sense. I've had a rollercoaster of a relationship with a Cancer guy, and every time he disappears on me I want to smack him, lol. The manipulation of getting involved with someone on a deep and emotional level, and then just abandoning them for stretches at a time because you feel you absolutely need to be alone is just rude and selfish. I don't care how alone you want to be, respect my understanding and intelligence and at least explain to me why you need to escape. Still, I don't think a lot these posts are meant to be personal. I don't think badly of Cancers, I think many of them have admirable traits, but to me they are definitely complicated. Personally, I am a sensitive and emotional person, but the Virgo in me likes straight forward answers and definitions, and Cancers aren't clear at all! Lol. I think a lot of the frustration you see towards Cancers on this forum isn't simply that they're Cancers, because---as you said---we are all individuals. We all should understand that astrology provides a specific canvas for each person, but whatever picture is painted on it is completely unique to him or her. Plus, IMO the way these Cancers (and other signs) act also has a lot to do with their and women are almost COMPLETELY different when it comes to handling and dealing with relationships. I've seen similar complaints about male Virgos, Pisces, etc. on other threads, and many times it is just a guy thing.

    (And to all men who may want to comment, this isn't men-bashing, just stating generalizatons among men that I've witnessed or heard about too many times to completely discredit. There are generalizations about women that I definitely agree with, lol).

  • Well, I am a cancer female and I don't know many male cancers.. other than the 2 in whom I am related to. But I get hurt easily and do agree witht he disappearing act. I really like this Virgo. And I think he likes me. Well, he said it. But he's so busy, and when he stops communicating I feel so embarassed about my feelings. We're just friends, but I have told him that I liked him and found him attractive. But when he stops talking to me... He just stops... and then a part of me just stops also. I think I am falling for a guy I have not even slept with. And so I busy myself daily... or try to... but I can't focus. I haven't been myself in months. I've felt as if I've lost my creative spirit. I feel lonely more. I mean, before this Virgo I bite my nails, I draw, paint, write children's stories, etc.. but then... he has somehow managed to make me stop all of that whenever I think about him. I can't focus. It drives me ballistic. But the sad part is that whenever I am depressed I do something creative. But now, I can't focus on creative outlets because I just feel sooo emotionally drained thinking about him!!! No matter what I do. And he makes me comfortable to be just me... which is sooo weird. I don't know anymore, I think I've become one of those pathetic poems. There is a taurus who is in LOVE with me, and I am trying to reciprocate, but the taurus makes me want to be a better person. While the Virgo wants me to be just me. Some days I want the taurus... But MOST days, I want my virgo to pay attention to me. I've never been in love. But is this a sign of being in love? I just feel so sad. Maybe this applies to everyone who is with a Virgo. Or maybe it's a cancer trait??? I don't know, sometimes, I want to go out and bang a couple of my pisces and scorpio admirers... I don't think this Virgo is having a positive effect on my creative spirit... but we are both soo similar it can be scary... oh, well, just thought I 'd share some cancerian issues... thanks:)

  • Hello Wickedmoon!

    Maybe he did! (that's funny)

    You can get your Past Life Report right here on Edgar Cayce has an AWESOME one. I has helped me tremendously...I wept when I read it, seriously...

    There are "soul memories" that return with us from each incarnation, therefore, many things will probably resonate as you read your report. It reminds us that we are "Spirit" beings having an earthly experience. We are ALL here to expand and evolve. The very person that may cause us the most pain could possibly be a "soul mate" that will help in our growth and becoming stronger, but may not be meant to remain attached to us. The key is to get the lesson and move on to the "next grade" without bitterness:) Just remember that, K?

    Best of the best to you!

  • If I may say one more thing about Cancers...we are better when we are balanced. It is almost s if we have to focus on one thing at a time and build ourselves up to the place in life that we long to be. For me, it is in this order:

    Spiritual well being

    Emotional/ physical health

    Financial stability

    Physical intimacy

    Notice what's last on the list:)

    The key is knowing what you want/need and having enough focus and discipline to make it happen. Then you will be happy and open to "true" love...until then, the cycle continues...

    Have a GREAT day!

  • well said attiro.

    Your right on, and when one thing in the list gets of balance we strive to fix it. Cancers are great problem solvers.

  • Thanks Mooninsag for your insights. We share the same rising and moon. My sun and Venus are in Taurus, Mars in Gemini.

    I am involved with a Cancer male, 7/6 bd. He put me through a big test on Saturday, luckily I realized what he was doing. I'm learning to REALLY listen to what he is telling me. Love is definitely conditional with my Cancer.

    He asked me last night if & how I know that he really loves me (it's taken me years and leaving him twice to realize this). Anyway, we haven't given up on each other.

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