Relationship with a cancer man
I have been with a cancer guy for about 2 months but I wasn’t sure of his intention to be in this relationship with me. I have suggested to make no contact with each other for one month. Because I feel that he is not over with his ex yet as he kept mentioning about her when we are together. He just broke off with his ex for about 3 months. I wanted him to think over on our relationship. After one month, he did not contact me. I made an effort to ask him what the outcome is. He told me he have not forgotten his ex and need long time to get heated of a broken heart. He also says that we have developed too fast. He wanted our relationship to remain as friend first. Later I know that he actually contacted his ex during the one month period. He doesn’t know how she thinks of him at the moment and he says that they also remain as friend. He also said that he needs a longer time to think deeper. He said he is not ready for our relationship which is completely the opposite of what he says when we are about to be together.
I sort of know what he meant, to wait to see if his ex will come back to him. If so, our relationship will be over. I feel make use. I wanted to get over him but I think I have already fallen for him. Over this few weeks after what he has said, I have been the one trying to contact him since we agreed to be friends. But we have been contacting through SMS only and I am always the one who initiates first.
He always delays the answering and gives excuse if he delays more than an hour. There is once he says he has fallen asleep and he replies me the next morning. But in his message, he types in smiley f face. I wonder what he is thinking and how he feels of me although I dare not ask him. Is he trying to reject me in a nice way?
No he just doesnt know what the hell nor whom the hell he wanna be with. he is in limbo. he doesnt know there is any one better for him out there than his ex. N when men regardless of sunsign act this way, its a defense mechanism. all u can do is stay friends n let him know u as friend r here for him. No less no more ok? N give him time to get over ex if thats his plans.
men take longer to get over a broken heart. to them its a FAILURE. n men take failures to heart. they are the weaker sex bc they useally are raised with the old saying men dont cry men show no feelings. its the whole macho male thing.
incase u need more info, google cancer men break ups, or n get the books written by john grey. they can shed insights on this topic as well.
good luck dear
Aqua>>I wonder what he is thinking and how he feels of me although I dare not ask him. Is he trying to reject me in a nice way?
Sandran>>This guy don't know who he wants to be with..and I hate this with Cancer men.Especially if they have baggage.Another woman so to speak.I guess when I was younger.In my 20's I went the back and forth route too.But, no kids were ever involved,.Come to the conclusion.I didn't want either one of them.I have this question with women.When they learn that the guy has an ex wife/girlfriend what-not.Why don't they just step aside?Especially with a kid involved.The worst you can feel is hurt.With time the hurt goes away.So you can heal and start over.Some men are just completely pathetic.The stringing and dragging you along gets way old and we get old along with it.I just don't have the time for it.Sorryyy..LOL