Do your cancer man call you offten?

  • I am also in a long distance relationship with a cancer, an airline pilot that's been flying more lately. We used to text a lot but he got a huge bill for international texting and it's been alot less now. He doesn't e-mail much either, I used to get upset when he didn't e-mail me or call me but I've learned to chill out a bit, he's been stressed with working a lot and being sleep deprived. When I do talk to him he is very affectionate and I've realized that just because he doesn't call or e-mail me as often as I would like him to does not mean he is not thinking of me. He's working a lot so he can accumulate time off so he can come see me.

    yes it seems like cancer men are very cautious when they have been hurt in the past. In my case i need to be gentle with him because I was the one that hurt him in the past, although it was nearly 14 years ago. I didn't mean to, I wasn't aware of how sensitive he was. He never forgot but came back to me 13 years later.

    So ladyyx-just relax, from what i have read, seems like cancer men aren't into calling or texting often. That doesn't mean he doesn't think of you. I can understand because i was frantic for awhile, especially when the texting stopped and I didn't hear from him for a week. If you really need someone who calls all the time then I would suggest you look for someone else, but if you really like him just let him be. I have learned not to be so insecure and demanding, and through this I feel like i am able to be more accepting of people as they are, and not everyone thinks and acts as i do.

  • My cancer guy doesn't email. He will text and call. Sometimes when we are texting he will stop and not respond back. Example Me: Hope your feeling better after ur operation. Wish I could be there to help but you won't let me. Him: I made my bed so I got to lay in it. Me: It's easier and niceier to know you got a friend that will help tuck in the corners of that bed. After that text from me he did not respond and I thought damn what did I say wrong? This was several months ago. It's been over 2 weeks since we spoke or text and I'am at the point if he calls he calls if he don't he don't. I care deeply for him but I really don't know what I'm waiting for. He said he kids would love me because of my kind heart yet I have never meet them. I am in no rush, I just have never dated a cancer guy and he is so different when it comes to communication. I have nothing to do with his past. I've not hurt him. I was thaught that when you say he care for someone you show by your actions? I have ben hurt by my ex husband and I have moved on. Who hasn't been hurt before?? Maybe I'm ready to trust and love again and my cancer guy isn't? I don't want to drive him away, so I thought it would be best that I don't call him for a while. I was always the one to text have a great day, thinking about you, drive safe and so on. It's was crazy though, The begining of the month he text me in the morning and said he had gotten alot of rest over the weekend. I text that I had something for his rested ass'') I went to sleep cuz I work nights. He called me and said he was down the streets from my house. I was trippin out cause I was still sleep and for him jsut to come over was totaly out of his norm??!! I was like your being very spontenous. We talked, and cuddled and enjoyed eachother'') He must have been turned on by my text and the planets were aligned cause he had never done that before. SInce then we have not seen eachother, only talked a few times and that's that. Should I move

    on? Since we've meet I have only been intimate with him. I'm not the type of woman to have more than one partner. Yet, we have not verbaly said we are in a committing relationship. Should I wait until we start communicating again and ask where do we stand? what does he want and need from me? does he see us being in a long term relationship? I don't know? I miss him yet I know I have to strong and if I need to move on I will. Please help if anyone can respond..... 😞

  • Hi My Skittles. I feel for you, I truly do. A cancer man can often drive you nuts! mad! insane!. I will speak of my experience as of course others will have their own. When I started seeing my cancer man. I was straight up and told him what I was not about. That is, casual relationship, mind games etc. and gradually I started to ask him all the questions you have up there. I liked my cancer man (I love him now) but back then what was most important to me were my wants and needs, of course it's different now. But at the time, I was adamant about not wanting to waste my time nor energy and anyone's if I didn't know or feel we were on the same page and I made that very clear. I suppose what I want to say to you is, if you feel that you have questions, go and ask them. There's nothing wrong. You just need to know and you deserve to know. Especially if it will bring you clarity and peace. It's also good what you're doing and giving him the space. I've learned not to let my cancer's actions, moods affect me so much. I'm used to it and just shrug my shoulders as I know he's fine. It's how he is, it's the norm.

  • Myskittles>>It's easier and niceier to know you got a friend that will help tuck in the corners of that bed. After that text from me he did not respond

    Sandran>>You got a little personal right there...I would clam up on something like that.You said that when he was not in the presence of his own surroundings.And he probably had company.You scared him..

    My skittles>>The begining of the month he text me in the morning.

    Sandran712>>My guess at this is he didn't have his kids with him.A Cancer will drop anything to be with their kids.Cancer with kids are not a good thing trying to start over in a new relationship.Cancer are too family oriented.They are too commited to the children.Maybe this is why I canot find anyone.I will dump any man when my kid is sick.If they will come back that is great.But,the men just will not get to know me long enough to come back.and it's damn hard enough being a single parent to special needs

    My skittles>>I went to sleep cuz I work nights. He called me and said he was down the streets from my house. I was trippin out cause I was still sleep and for him jsut to come over was totaly out of his norm??!! I was like your being very spontenous. We talked, and cuddled and enjoyed eachother'') He must have been turned on by my text and the planets were aligned cause he had never done that before

    Sandran>>I think he just wanted s-e-x.I don't think it had anything to do with planets at all.

    Him not coming back probably has nothing to do with you at all.I have never got involved with a guy with children.This guy probably busy with his kids and working.And that alone can make a guy tired.I've said before on other posts.Cancer has a habit of running back to the ex for comfort/whatnot.Because what they are already comfortable with.Cancers do not like to hunt for someone new.We go after what we already had.

  • Thank you VirgoCookie, I've been crying the last few days listening to the cd's he made for me. I guess that's part of my healing process. I will ask him when the time is right. I know with all that is going on in his life divorce, 2 jobs, not having his own place and finding one, being in a stable relationship is most likely that last thing on his mind. I just don't want to be another "female friend" that he see's and hooks up with when it's good for him. If that is all he wants and needs from me then I'm the wrong friend. I have so much more to offer and give. I know we both deserve more. I will not force nor give my support and love to no man that doesn't want it. I've been divorced for almost 5 years and this cancer guy seemed to be so ginuwine, we both have so much in common. He expressed that he cares and has deep feelings for me. Even with me being a gemini I thought he would run for the hills since his soon to be ex is also a gemini. He touched my mental, spiritual, emotional and physical being the first 5 months we met. These last 3 has been the hardest ever. Was that just manipulations on his part and I fell for it? I feel so stupid exposing my vulnerability and my desires to him. He knows I care and I have showed with my actions not just words. I have meet other men that wants to take me out and have a good time and have turned them all down wishing on a hope that most likely will not exsist. I will keep you updated VirgoCookie. Thank you so much for all your help and support'')

  • Sandran712 Thanks, from what he has told me the kids live with the Mom. He only see's them 2x a month maybe? He talks to me about how hurt he is about not seeing his kids as much as he wants. The mother isn't doing a good job and he can't take them because he lost his home and is living with his best friend. I believe he is not over her because he talks about things that she has done that has hurt him. He say's he will never go back to her becasue she hurt him to a point of no return. He will say mean things about her and I will ask him to stop and encourage him to think positive and maybe she will change to be a better mom to thier kids. I try not to feed into people's negative past. Even though my ex husband hurt me I have moved on and try not to talk about our past only if someone ask. When he talks about his soon to be ex wife and the bad things I try my best to listen as a friend not a lover. I have been strong and not called him and I will try my best to just love myself and let him work out his own problems.

  • My Skittles>>know with all that is going on in his life divorce, 2 jobs, not having his own place and finding one, being in a stable relationship is most likely that last thing on his mind.

    Sandran712>>Oh Lordy! He has alot. on his plate.Not everyone heals from a divorce at the same rate as others.You been divorced 5 years.I take it he is newly divorced.It may take him as long as it did for you.I went to grief counseling when all my friends died.They told me that a divorce is worse kind of grief.I beg to differ.But, that is what they said.Divorce is the same as a death.I never could understand how you can compare divorce to a suicide.I have been dealt with 3 friends to suicide and 2 from natural causes in the last 7 years.One suicide being my sons dad.It has been hard for me to move on.

  • My skittles>>I believe he is not over her because he talks about things that she has done that has hurt him

    Sandran>>It is okay for him to come over when he needs a s-e-x because it confuses the relationship.and it will make you feel used..Don't worry.He will be back.You don't have to call.He knows where you are at.I think he needs alot of healing to do.See.. this is why I hate men who are divorced.I have never been married.I am 46.And guys my age have been around the block more than walking through Walmart..Half a dozen kids.Too damn much baggage.I guess I'll have to stay in church to keep what sanity I have left.I come from a graduating class of like..200.There is only 9 of us ladies from this class that has never been married.I've had guys say I am too pretty to be single.I am just average.But, I get asked all the time why am I not married yet.I would have to say it's because of my son hsving handicaps.Guys run like cockroaches when you have a special needs kid..

  • new to this but I am a cancer,and when I have feelings for someone i have a problem of smuthering them so now if it hurts dont show it . if you love them try to pull away,and if your jealous dont look. I will never understand men. the cancer man I was engaged tooa few yrs back was so insecure he scared me away and I loved him very deeply.the tauris im seeing now i think im just scared that he like all the rest will date me for a minute then find a younger model and i will be demoted.and for the record just because a cancer says they dont love u .that is our armor so when the man finds the next one it doesnt show how badly it hurts until at night when we are alone and all we think about is you and how muchwe hurt inside and we can cry it out without our ex and his new chick kill our heart....then we buck up after isolating for about 3 mths and we try to forget....if you love a cancer woman and you earn her trust nand can keep her respect-in the end it will be worth taking the time to let her know you truly love her.....she will die for you......

  • HazeLrain420. llindieloo here . Hello to you ;, Do cancer men act and feel the same as cancer women ? If you would be so kind and you have the time could you please read my forum "Have i lost my cancer b/f for good" I would like your imput . I doubt very much if he goes to bed and cries about me , But let me know what you think ? Await your reply and could you also reply on my post . Thank you so much. xxxxx

  • hello all. I have to say reading these topics gives me some hope I must say. Unfortunately I tend to end up with cancer men far too often and believe me they come with their issues. Now, the first was my fiance' and this was over twenty years ago. I dated him for 4 years on and off again. IT WAS Awful but in the end it was myself who left. I was young but oh how I vowed to never date a cancer again. Then I married a Libra, divorced. Then low and behold the next phase of hell in my life was to begin. ANOTHER CANCER Kevin. 8 years of on again and off again oh how I tormented myself along with his ability to cause me grief. I loved him more than anything so I thought but again finally after years of living in limbo, pain, being isolated and ignored(A KEY CANCER TRAIT IS TO NOT CALL-RESPOND TO YOU-AND ACT LIKE YOU ARE NOT ALIVE )--for weeks ---alone I chose to leave him. NOW AGAIN I almost walked out of the first date when this gentleman told me his birthday was July 13th, no kidding, I am being ignored, and isolated by a cancer whom was the PERFECT BOYFRIEND FOR 3 months!! OOPS MY BAD out from nowhere he started his disappearing acts and BOOM--gone its over and havent heard nothing from him in over a week and trust and believe I didn't provoke this little spell of "I AM GOING BACK TO MY SHELL" this time. With the other two cancers yes often their retreat was secondary to some outburst of mine, but this time I am bewildered as I swear I did everything by the book. I am a sag with cancer rising and I KNOW I am difficult at best but it goes to show that cancer men (in my experience) are all the same and never ever will I date another one. HELL TO THE KNOW--ahh it sucks when they ignore you AND DISAPPEAR. i hate it. good luck XOXO

  • @MySkittles, I think with all guys not just cancer want what they can't have it. If he hasn't declared to being in a relationship with you than texting naughty text is not a very good idea. He probably sees you as not much of a chase and all men young and old loves the chase.

    @DontDorien after hearing what you have to say about cancer man it makes me scared, I've only been in a relationship with him for 2 years and its been an emotional roller coaster ride. I love him alot.. I am a capricorn and no one has even came close to my expectations as he has. But there are times where i just wanna bang my head against a wall because i become so frustrated. I am still young tho so i might still have lots of learning to do...but i believe in everyone has that one person for them. Hope you find that person one day good luck!

  • my boyfriend and I sun signs are compatible (capricorn and cancer) but our moon signs are soooo incompatible (pisces and gemini) hence all the fighting in the relationship. Im an emotionally needy person and he is more rational no wonder i demand so much attention from him.

  • Sweetheart, unfortunately my husband died in 2007 a week after the KENTUCKY DERBY!! (May 7th) I live in Louisville, KY not that far from the racetrack and we had just been to the Kentucky Oaks (Friday) when a thunderstorm came up on us and we got soaked. My husband Joseph got drinched, something that should not have happened because he had heart surgery earlier that year. A week later he died. He was 51 yrs old. I'm not going to say that we didn't have our differences or arguments b/c I would be lying. I will say that I lost the man that I loved with every fiber in my being every cell in my brain and every tear drop in my eye! I still miss him and have not ventured out!! My choice! I loved him but I have to move on and I haven't found anyone to move on with and that's fine with me!! I've always believed, even when I met Joe that when God is ready for you to be with someone he will decide the tme, place and circumsance. I'm thru talkin', GOOD NIGHT!!

  • casper402032 i am so sorry to hear that, i hope all is well.

    Here is an update with my cancer...I got really fed up with him not calling me so what did I do? instead of complaining i put my foot down and said enough was enough. I told him I want a man who can communicate with me not withdraw and not contact me. If you can't do this than I don't think you're the one for me. He said he loves me and will try harder...the past few days hes been calling me before he went to bed and random calls me to see what I was doing it caught me by surprise. = ) but lets see how long this will last i have my fingers crossed hoping its not just a temporary thing...

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