What do you need most to feel loved by another person?



  • Do you need a partner who recognises that you need space to breathe - someone who understands your desire for alone time on occasion and does not panic or cause an argument over this? Or someone with a good sense of humour.. someone who can make you laugh? Someone who needs your help and support? Someone who makes you feel needed? Or someone you can have long conversations with...?

    What sort of things do you need to feel that someone really loves you?



  • I'm not sure why this struck me as an unusual question or topic. I guess I'd say that I'd like to have

    (I'm not real comfy w/ the word need) people as in a mate, friend, family etc a relationship that gives in a way I can "get"meaning we "get" each other. Presence is important meaning when they are there w/ me we are sharing a moment. And it doesn't have to be a long time I can get filled up pretty fast if a soul is really there. I've been outta relationship for many moons now and I do prefer a lot of space but I don't require a mate just some good honest friends and family who all can show we care for each other.

    I've been told I take my independent spirit to the extreme but

    of late I've been recovering from a broken knee and I learned some difficult lessons about my needs and some of the pitfalls of choosing to be the loner also who my true friends are and who are my fair weather friends. I learned that being there in a persons time of need is a wonderful way to show someone you love them. I trust I can repay that debt some day when I am fully healed.

    Sorry if I got a bit off topic

    Pfree



  • The gaze from her blue eyes. Just that feeling in the room or the way she always hugged me. Maybe she treats everyone this way Sorry I bit the bait but yeah I fell for my female friend. Out of her respect of tell me she didnt like me I couldnt be friends and that was the worst cause I can't even fight for the girl of my heart. Imature to walk the other way but I assumed she didnt like me and I could move on then. If it wasnt meant to be its not. Lets just say everything tells me her lips lie but her eyes where saying something totally different that other people pointed out to me and I asked other woman. I dont wanna fight for any other woman but might need to set my deepest feelings aside and this may be one thats not for me unfortunatley. for the record I felt bad I fell so hard . I just dont know y I can't let her go.



  • Well I have a little longer list now, but I want- to be apprecited fot the things I do and not be taken advantaged of for them. I don't lie cheat, or steal and I expect the same. Someone not abusive in ANY way. I want an intellectual equal and somebody that's willing to help me physically. I have a weird sense of humor but I don't like vulgarity. I can be quite chidish (when in a good mood) I am not physical at all. But I can be very verbal. Basically, I want another me but in male form LOL



  • Unrelentless Honesty - Point Blank



  • Here's my list, Captain 😉

    No specific order, but it's these 3 things.

    -> Makes me feel VERY VERY WANTED, regardless of whether I'm needed or not.

    -> Values the things I do to try to make them happy... and tries to make me happy.(Doesn't have to succeed as long as they try... though they'll always succeed if they try, because the fact that they bothered trying is already enough to make me happy).

    -> Likes/wants to spend time with me(including time JUST with me).



  • Security... knowing they are there because they want to be and value me. And that they are truly there for me. I did not have that in friendships and family relationships... so it is paramount in romantic relationships.

    Also sacrifice, I think I tell a lot about a person by the things they are willing to give up or sacrifice to be with me. Love is unselfish and the more giving the person is the more I feel loved.



  • Hey Captain, I have been thinking about this lately...I need a man who is secure in himself an our relationship. I like time together but as long as I know that we are a couple, I am secure in him being out and doing his own thing. I don't need a man to support me financially and I don't want to do the same for him but I don't see a problem with helping out here and there as needed.

    I used to tell people that I could see my ex husband's potential when we first got together (it was true). It peaked and then he bombed. I think I eclipsed him and he could not handle it.

    I do think it is important for couples to support each other.



  • one more thing and very important- I want a man of his word! If you say you are going to do something, then you better do it! TRUST!



  • This has really got me thinking; these qualities in a person's nature, such as honesty, sincerity, commitment, care & respect for one another etc, are very important in order to appreciate a loving relationship. These are the very first things i discovered in my hubby 2 years ago when we first met online & i felt really loved to such an extent that i can't live without him!



  • What you want in another person is very telling about your own needs.



  • A few things I consider paramount.....1. consistant 2. evolving 3. observant to life.... Havent met him yet but I am hoping to 😉



  • I could gve you a list. It's just from experiences so I know I can definately tell you what I don't want. I want somewhat someone more specific! But, I am not real picky as long as they are sincere.



  • Captain,

    I had a feeling you were probing a bit deeper than you let on..:-)

    How about you what do you require?

    Pfree



  • some one who wants to hug you more, and see you for the way you are, that if your different than other people it shouldn't matter to them, looks dont always count, personality and how you act towards others should.

    if relationships were only made to base on the looks of other people, not the personality, how is that a relationship, you would hardley know the person, because you were only to be interested in what they looked like, rather than what there personality is about.

    Best wishes

    RebeccaAnn



  • Because I change as I grow, I am happy to accept whoever comes into my life because I know they are exactly what I need at the time. I also know I have to let go when they have taught me and learned what I and they need to know. I know that i will have different needs at different times of my life.



  • A lot of what you want in a partner is what you have felt a lack in over the course of your life.



  • So, I guess when I say I want to be the center of his universe and vice-versa it must mean I'm a pretty needy individual! LOL! An all-encompassing physical, emotional and spiritual bond; passionate, deep connection. Have never even come close to finding it!



  • I guess. I would then (or now) have an issue with detatchment. It took me a while to be able to let go of my ex. Even though I knew he wasn't the guy for me. I think I wanted someone so bad, I didn't want to let him go until I medically, emotionally, and physically just couldn't stay there anymore. But I still don't want to be with someone I won't be with. I'm sure that will happen as they all seem like the right one at the time. I want a friend more than a b-f.



  • Security, feeling loved. Took me a while to figure out the alone time, but I need my own alone time and as the other person too. Thanks Captain.