Have i lost my cancer b/f for good ?

  • Thank you Katie, I am sure youretheoceon will have learned quite a lot from your comments , thanks again .

  • youretheoceon. Also I don't think this guy knows what he wants,until theni would tell himwhen he figures it out to give you a call. His ex might not be a threat, you mentioned he has a Facebook account check outt his status, does he play a lot of facebook games. I know Cancer on these games for hours on end. I would try inreracting with him on FB. Just say.. Hi ... post it on his wallso the ex can see it .I also think he is playing you both.

    As for getting to know him intimately. Not so fast. His ex probably knows all about youand that is why he's posting on his likes.I would encourage he gets a confrontation by his ex Serves him right for playing around.

    It's a Cancersnature to go astrayand go backwards with Exe's He will come back to you when its convienient for him. A Cancer will use someone as a back up, which is why he is having you hanging and not being direct. I would not dump him for good just yet.

    It is normal for a Cancer to go mising in action,there is not enough information to push him away.

    Don't pay to much attention to what his girlfriend does on Facebook.... I would just play it back.... post on his board . Good luck . Hugs xx

  • Katie, I'm so so sorry to hear that you're not in the best place..And to be able take up time to give me really good advice - THANK YOU! Don't believe what others say about aquarius girls. You have a huge heart..

    "the thing i realized is that they are always going very strong with contacting you at the beginning. i won't analyze it all around, im guessing they like the chase and somehow when they get what they want, they dont have to chase anymore..." Yes, you hit the nail on the board. And cancer boy told me he wasn't into playing games but this is exactly how he was in the beginning. I'm starting to think that he tells me what I want to hear but it's either a lie or he doesn't follow-up on his promises..I'm at the point where I'm so desensitized by his behavior of ignoring me but staying active on FB. Not only that but uploading his vacation pics while he's still on vacation!!! I tried "liking" his status updates but then his ex swoops in and "likes" them, too. I think I'm contending with his ex now, the same one that dumped him after 5+ years together.

    llindieloo, you just wrote what I've been feeling this past week..that I'm just this back up girl unless the ex stops giving him attention. His ex does know all about us because we were openly flirting with each other on FB in the beginning. We even bumped into her one time in his neighborhood. But what got me suspicious was when I noticed that she was no longer on his friends list but then they became friends again. And this was a repeated activity on his wall. It's as if they were friending each other and defriending again. And he wasn't hiding this at all!! He must be relishing on the fact that he has two girls wanting him. I don't know if he's plays FB games but I'm scared what goes on between him and his ex 😞

    I just cannot contact him. Not on FB. Not by phone or texting. It'll just push him away - I know it.. It really feels that it's over in my head and in my heart. I know a week isn't long but I never had someone who I was supposedly 'seeing' treat me this way. I would be in utter shock if he did get in touch with me next week. I just cannot go back to the way things were when all the red signs are there...But, I don't know whether I should let him know that he's a douche or just fade silently out of his life..Again- thanks for listening to me and helping me out. This thing has been slowly killing me inside. I don't know how much hurt I can take at this point but I'm so glad I found you guys }}}HUGS{{{

  • llindieloo---> i am devastated. i dont know how to get a hold of myself. here's whate happened..he came back from his holiday broken up with his ex and we spent every single day together after that for hours. he seemed really happy with me then one fine morning he calls me up saying that he wants to talk to me and is quite annoyed with his ex calling him all morning his ex (libra sun) is back on the picture again. she kept pleading, begging and haunting his house for 5 days refusing to budge and he finally gave in and told me that we should just remain friends for now and that by the end of 3 months things would definitely be clear (whether they break up for good and forever or they move in together). i keep trying to convince him not to let things change between us but he says it depends on how things go with her. he cannot understand why i am so upset given that we were never in a relationship. he says he owes her this last chance since she gave him 2 years of his life and that she is 25 now. further i know that he is not in love with her and doesnt really want to get back but has done so only because she convinced him so much. now, i can either be good friends to him and let him go by getting over him or still try for him and wait for him for 3 months? what should i do?i really dont know..besides the june 26th lunar eclipse is going to be of some significance. how does it affect me and his relationship with his ex?

    the only advantage that girl has over him is the fact that she was his gf for 2 years!! i am so sick of it! he finally told me that chances of them working out is very slim 60-40(not working out-working out) earlier it was 40-60..i really dont know..just because she tried her hardest to get him back he gave in. so what if i try my hardest and not let him go?

  • Arienprincess>> hi, i know we dont know each other and i dont like to talk into other people's lives just like that...

    but this what you are telling is a pretty big mess. i mean... your relationship with him depends on how he can work things out with his ex??? and you are still there and trying to convince him? please, don't do that. you are a woman, you have to gain some self-respect and do not let him set the terms.

    if you are important enough for him... then he should know he wants you. he is trying to figure out on which chair to sit on... do you wanna be a second choice?

    i do not wanna be harsh or mean, i tell it for your own good and your own protection...

    i understand that they were together for 2 years and that is a lot. a lot of memories together etc... but the past is past and should be left there... the present is the present, he should be able to decide with whom to live it...

    just think about it... as a good friend of mine here used to tell me: NEVER SETTLE FOR LESS THAN WHAT YOU DESERVE. you (like everyone else) deserve a man who knows for sure that he wants you...

    again, im sorry to talk into it, i just had to... i hope i dont upset you... again... i tell it for your own sake.

    ps: you cant blame all on the ex... if he knew for sure what he wants, she could do ANYTHING in the world, it could not convince him...

  • katie1982...i'm not offended or anything...what you are saying is completely true..i think the same way myself sometimes but why cant i just let it go??? it is so so so hard for me. sometimes i wish i never met him. i cant stop thinking about him at all. i'm hopelessly in love with him!

  • arienprincess>> i think i know what you feel. i went through the same. i mean there was no ex, but otherwise it was a crab. he left me without a word, just disappeared after half year of being together... so i know. and it was the second time he left. first time was milder disappearance or rather to say distancing himself. i almost got over him and then he came back for whatever reason... and i was dumb enough to give him a second change.

    i know that you fall for them easily, cause they exactly know how to make you fall in love, they know what makes you tick...

    it was hard for me too and i am still not over him, BUT i completely won self-respect and i know that i should not settle something that is not constant and that is not respecting me in the way it should. he was great, is great still and god knows what he thinks/feels, but i learnt to put myself in priority and im forcing myself to see that even if he is so special and great... at the end of the day he is not putting the effort i need him to put in order to feel safe and special.

    so im working on getting over him...

    were you ever in love before? im sure you were. you remember the feeling when that love was over? how painful that was? and you thought you will never ever love again, cause there is no one else in this world that is so special etc?

    i did feel that way. and then time passed by and i did fall in love again and looking back im just smiling about myself thinking i never will. keep your head up and respect yourself enough to be able to say NO for how he treats you/the situation. every day is a misery for a while, but then it gets better. 🙂 there are people here who support each other, people here helped me a lot and still are helping me to keep my faith. 🙂

  • katie--->>i was in a relationship that lasted 4 years ago but somehow faded away and ended with the distance. even though i know my ex is hopelessly in love with me.. several times i think i should try and work it out with him but given the distance and 2 different continents it doesnt look plausible for the nextt wo years atleast. besides i dont know if i can ever be the same with him after this guy.he has changed me in a way i cant imagine. i want to stop yet i cannot..my ex was capricornian. i wish i wasnt so unlucky in love. are you still friends with the cancer guy? the cancer i'm involved with luckily doesnt disappear without explanations and is generally extremely polite and caring about me.

    Does someone know to analyse birth charts over here??

  • arienprincess>> well me and cance guy's relation is pretty complicated, given that we have the same friends, we belong to the same cirlce of friends....

    since he does not talk to me (it's over 4 weeks now) i've met him once in the group of friends last friday. i think he felt bad for what he did, cause he was 'hiding' from me and did not talk a word to me, didn't even dare to look at me. i am pretty hurt, but still consider him a friend. i don't know how he thinks about it. we do not talk at all, since he 'disappeared'.

    well i also wish that i wasnt that unlucky in love, but im hoping things will change.

    yours might not disappear and goes on being caring and polite cause you didnt put him into a direct situation.

    let me explain what i mean. crab disappeared/stopped talking to me and reacting to my e-mails after i mentioned him (not in a rude way) that it makes me sad he does not wanna spend time with me over the weekends. since i put him into this situation, he knew he cant just pretend i havent said that, he should give me some kind of answer... but he didnt want to, so he ran rather.

    what do you mean with analyzing birth charts? to pull the natal chart? you can do that too, on internet, there are sites that offer free birth charts.

    but if you want an analysis, get your info (date and place of birth and time of birth, i mean hour and minute) and get his too and start a new thread i advice directed to TheCaptain. like "TheCaptain, please could you do me an analysis?" she helped a lot of people here already, but she likes people to do an own thread and there she answers you. 🙂

    she is the best i know on this forum. 🙂

  • well this time i pushed the cancer guy directly too and cornered him but surprisingly he hasnt disappeared and insists that we remain friends and that i just go with the flow. i already have his and mine birth charts but i would appreciate some analysis especially the effect of the upcoming lunar eclipse.

    Even we have the same set of common friends. my worst possible experience is if he gets her to the same get together i'm going with our friends. he never did this in the past 5 months. i asked him if he's gonna get her for a dinner we are both attending at a friend's he said it depends on how he's feeling at that time. We also had a trip planned to an amusement park and he said he's def not gonna ask her to come as he doesnt like her tagging along with him everywhere

  • arienprincess: yes the lunar eclipse interests me very much too. 🙂

    your guy's behavior is very strange to me, but let's see what TheCaptain tells you. 🙂

  • http://aol.tarot.com/forum/topic.php?id=8185&replies=1#post-123306

    this is the link to the new thread i created for TheCaptain. is this person supposed to be gifted or something? i have seen a couple of his replies and he definitely knows what he's doing! i can't wait to hear from him now

  • arienprincess>> it is not he, it's a she. 🙂 and yes, she is gifted, she has good 'feelers'. at least all the people i know (who asked her already) were satisfied, telling that she is quite accurate. 🙂

  • You may have read my threat CANCER MALE DRAMA.

    As of yesterday, I finally let of my Cancer male. I still love him and care for him and want to be with him but his game playing has driven me away.

    I text him: I failed your test. I can't play your game anymore. You win, youre free of me now, Goodbye.

    On his FB wall I wrote: You win goodbye.

    I left a cup cake with eatable hearts and a card on his door step and he never text or called to say thank you. This was the last straw. I sent him the above text at 1130pm.

    His reply: Hi how are you. Sorry I didnt answer your call or text I was at the gym and didn t have my phone. Thank you for the cup cake and happy tu b'av (jewish valetines day). I don't know what exam/test youa re talking about so you cant fail it. 🙂 1145pm

    I didn't respond. He tired calling me, I didnt pick up.

    He text: When did you drop the cup cake around because some of it has been eaten. I think my flatmate or the cat eat it. 1148pm.

    I didn't repsond.

    Another text: I just saw what u posted on my wall. It made me understand. U had no right to write this! I think that we just live in two different planets. i think that this time it really is goodbye. I wish you only good. 1204am.

    What do you make of the above? I have played his game for almost 3 months. He gets home from work at 8pm. He doesn't contact me until after I send him the text Goodbye. He can't be that busy to not say "hi thanks for the cup cake".

    My friend friend thinks that he is trying to get control. She thinks its not over because he isn't acting indifferently. This mean he still likes me. I find his last text manipulative by throwing in I think.......when I have stated Ive given up.

    Do you think he is really goingto say goodbye? I havent did anything to hurt him or insult him. if anything, I just feel in love with him.

  • Excuse the typos

  • whatever you dodont write back octoberlibra.....stand your ground..Cancers like that. keep strong!!

  • Hi octoberlibra, Well I did tell you to run, run , run . these Cancer's like to play with our feelings . I have not heard from my ex Cancer in over 9 months .I helped him stay in the UK by paying fo his Visa and University fees. Over 4,000 pounds . He took just my money then dumped me . I agree with scorpioinlove. Stand your ground . Good luck .

  • Thats awful llinieloo. He can't stay in the UK forever. Are you in touch with his family?

  • No. nor did i ever meet them as they live in India . I think he is suppose to be going back there for good in September , although he did say he would trry and get an extension for a further 2 years , but that will cost money .

  • I plan to stand my ground because really I have done nothing bad to him but fall in love with him. Ive never insulted him or told him I dont want him or cheated on him with anyone else. I feel stronger now. I am a ltitle tempted to contact him but I know its counter productive. His last text to me was sent to get me to react and it almost did. I realised, I just told him it was over and he is just confirming what Ive already told him. I think he wants control. He aint getting it. Yes, I should have run. Love is not a game, love is a risk and you have to risks. Funny you say that becaise on our second date, when he told me I was a Cancer I thought............no second third date, run. I didnt

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