How do i conquer the heart of a Taurus Men ??
I’m letting you know that I am currently writing this reply on the metro, that’s how dedicated I am to responding.
We Taurus men can be a bit much to live/deal with so on the behalf of all of us I do apologize. But ladies you too have to take some credit in creating the monster to which you now deal with.
Remember these four things when it comes to dealing with any man of ANY sign.
1. You teach people how to treat you.
2. If you stand for nothing you'll fall for anything
3. Don’t be no hard rock when you really are a Gem.
4. It doesn’t take all day to recognize sunshine.
"You teach people how to treat you"- this goes double; I’m sorry make that TRIPLE when it comes to Taurus men. We are men & women of routine and we love power and confidence, if you get into the habit or routine if allowing us to treat you in a way that you don’t deem as right or fair then you need to address the problem right away before it become the light for which we will see you in, and the manner for which we will treat you. From your post I’ve gathered that you've allowed this guy to treat you like an option and now you want him to treat you like a priority. If you want this to happen you need to start putting your foot down and addressing the things that you don’t feel he's doing right. And once you’re addressed the issues you need to hold him to them. Don’t let him slack off, and let him know if he does there will be hell to pay. We are great listeners, and once he gets into the routine of treating you the way you see is fit then reward him, allow him to see that you appreciate what he’s doing. Remember to always start off the conversation with the things that you love about him, and then go into the things to which he can change.
"If you stand for nothing then you'll fall for anything" - you have to show him you have a backbone (not saying you don’t). Don’t allow him to get away with shit. And the moment he does something that you've already told him not to do cut him off for a while. I call this “Fasting”. Just like fasting allows religious to be awoken in some divine way…it can do wonders for us bulls too. You have to be hard on him because that’s what he needs, and that’s what he’s going be to you as well. I don’t think people really understand how high of a regard we bulls hold the people we love to, but its quite high. We sometimes expect the impossible because that’s what we feel we give you. I once told a guy my definition of “Love” and he told me that it sounded like something out of a Disney movie and that it intimidated him to try and live up to it. I told him I understood, but that’s the bar to which I set for the man to which I will marry because that’s the bar to which I’ve set for myself. You have to be willing to challenge him. We Taurus love strong women/men. We need to know we can depend on you, that you won’t run in the first sign of trouble, and that you’re tough enough to make it without us. We want to be a special part of your world not the whole thing…I think you went wrong by telling him how you felt too soon, and thus giving him all your power in the relationship to take it as fast or as slow as he wants and by allowing him to see that you will “Wait” for him. That’s a lot of pressure for any man, Taurus or not. Because now he's responsible for another persona feelings and what if he doesn’t entirely feel the same way yet or quite worse what if he never does?! See that’s were the "take it slow" comes from. It’s like two people traveling on the same road towards the same destination. You arrive at the first check point first and he's still driving and enjoying the scenery so it still might be a ways before he arrives to where you are. You see therein lies the problem because just because he wants to take the scenic route doesn’t mean you should have to pitch a tent and wait on him. In a perfect relationship there would be one car, and you'd arrive at the same emotional check points at the same time. But let’s face it those relationships don’t exists. And because they don’t one person always ends up being faster in arriving then the other which puts pressure on the second, and leads to the person with the pressure to be the person in power (whether they want to be or not). That power in the wrong hands can lead to manipulation of the heart and/or him taking you for granted.
"Don’t be no "hard rock" when you really are a Gem" baby girl respect is just the minimum!!! It’s like Lauren said!! This guy needs to see you for you. The great girl I’m sure you are. He needs to always remember he's not the only "Richard" Wink Wink out there. We Taurus have egos and sometimes we need to be put in our place. If this guy isn’t ready for a relationship and you are then you need to except that fact and move on a bit. Test the waters, allow him to see that as great as he is you’re not going to wait on him forever. That while he's taken the scenic route you are back at the check point talking to José the hot farm hand, and if he doesn’t speed the F-up you and José are going to jump on the back of his Harley and ride off into the sunset. I do admit we Taurus like to take things slow, but it’s a difference in taking it slow towards a common direction and taking it slow in your own direction. He needs to see, know, and respect your worth and he needs to see that if he doesn’t you will leave him in the drop of a hat.
"It dont take all day to recognize sunshine" remember what I said about us Taurus taking our time. Well time like most things eventually runs out. It shouldn’t take him forever to realize that you’re a good thing and an opportunity that he will miss out on if he doesn’t get his shit together. You need to cut back on the quality time a bit, which I know will hurt but you need to jolt him into seeing that you’re not going to be his plan B, but his whole damn alphabet. No sex!! No cuddling!! No romantic runs!!! Texting that’s it, and when you feel like it. It won’t take long for him to notice that things are changing that the routine he's use to is becoming something different, and when he questions you on your sudden behavioral changes you simple reply “this is how I treat my friends"….. You’re giving him too much, spoiling him, and doing more than the average women would. If he wants that side/part of you back then he needs to commit to you otherwise he needs to get what you are willing to give him when YOU feel like it. Take your power back!! The private time is reserved for your MAN he had the opportunity to play the role of your Partner or your friend in your life and he chose the latter of the two. So starve…make him go on a fast.... Trust me this will drive him BONKERS, because we Taurus hate change, and what’s even worse is we hate to see the people we care about moving on and leaving us behind. When he does get the opportunity to be back in your life again you need to make sure he’s really ready for what you want, sit down with him. Talk about what your expect the relationship to be and where you both see it going, and what you expect from him and he from you. People always pass up a good thing because there so worried there going to miss out on what’s coming next. If he sees that your always going to be there then that’s how he will treat you. If he wants to be "Friends" then give him that. But remember that friends don’t sleep with each other, don’t cook for each other, don’t cuddle, and aren’t intimate. Friends come and go, your MAN is your first priority (or one higher than a friend).
Always remember you have to "Act like a women and think like a man" and above all know your worth. We Taurus don’t generally mess with anyone of lesser substance so the fact that he's seeing you is good but you can’t allow him to treat you any kind of way, or else that will become the pattern...the routine. And the guy that you like will turn into the guy you hate all because you taught him it was okay to be Scar when you were looking for Simba.
I hope this helps.
Thank you so much ConfusingCancer! All of the things you have addressed in your response are completely accurate. I have allowed my Taurus to treat me in a way that I am uncomfortable with and given him all of the power in our relationship. I believe that I said all I needed to about what I need and want in our last conversation, and have decided to cut him off. I am moving on with the knowledge that if I do not get what I need from him, we were never meant to be anyhow, and the "worst" that can happen is I meet someone else who will treat me the way I deserve to be treated. I will let you know how everything works out : )
Again, many thanks, I feel so much better this morning!
No problem!! Remember you diserve the best. And I'm almost 99% sure if you follow what I say you will see a change in him. But by that time you might have moved onto something better and if you have HIS LOST!!
Hey Confusing Cancer,
I have been reading this posts and I like the advice you post. Practical, sensible advice. I wonder if you would mind responding to my post. I didn't know how to private message you so thought I would just reply here. Sorry if it seems I am hi-jacking, I don't mean to!
Really appreciate it!
I'm a Taurus woman. I will tell you how most Cancers are perceived by Bulls. I dated Cancers before. We love differently from the way Cancers do. Cancers get caught up in the entire idea of Romanticism, flowers, candy, constant need to be reassured and enamored. Almost like watching a soap-opera. This is too much emotional work for a Bull. We simply don't have the time and patience.
Bulls have more of a realistic concept of love. It may not include verbal expressions of love, but its more concrete, tangible and everlasting. We NEVER ever just love you for the moment. No temporary infatuation for us. You see, a Bull may not stroke your ego, but we will fight for you until the end. We may not give you flowers, but we will lay in bed with you, hold you while you're ill...when the rest of the world has abandoned you.
Just because our emotions are not displyed, it does not mean that we're iceboxes. We're emotionally strong individuals. When the rest of the world falls apart in the time of a crisis. We stand strong....and fight!
You want your Taurus to love you????
Don't push us into making a decision.
Tell us what you don't like
Stand your ground, never hide from us. Tell us off. We LOOOOOve it!
We ONLY want longevity from someone who isn't afraid to fight for us.
No whimps! No crybabies!
Never come at us sideways.
We're not as pompous or ' the pefectionists' as the zodiac makes us out to be.
We would date a real nobody over a fake somebody any day.
Yes, Bulls DETEST pretentious people.
If you want us, tell us.
if you love us..show us....don't hide from us.
I will be honest with you.
Bulls, we can also be very selfish, money-driven, family-focused, and yes...
Sometimes we WILL forget that you exist.
But the key is, not to let us get away with it.
Because when you hide out....
This is exactly what you do.
Allow us to get away with it.
Thank you for your post. I am not a Cancer but involved with a Taurus Man. I did all that you said, be direct and told him what's what. I guess my error was in pushing him to make a decision. I guess my question to you is that we seem okay on the surface, but he does not reach out like before. Should I just give it time and trust that things will swing back around?
My story is at Back with Taurus man again...lol. Appreciate your time!
This was posted by ConfusingCancer
"We Taurus love strong women/men. We need to know we can depend on you, that you won’t run in the first sign of trouble, and that you’re tough enough to make it without us. We want to be a special part of your world not the whole thing…I think you went wrong by telling him how you felt too soon, and thus giving him all your power in the relationship to take it as fast or as slow as he wants and by allowing him to see that you will “Wait” for him. That’s a lot of pressure for any man, Taurus or not. Because now he's responsible for another persona feelings and what if he doesn’t entirely feel the same way yet or quite worse what if he never does?! See that’s were the "take it slow" comes from. It’s like two people traveling on the same road towards the same destination. You arrive at the first check point first and he's still driving and enjoying the scenery so it still might be a ways before he arrives to where you are. You see therein lies the problem because just because he wants to take the scenic route doesn’t mean you should have to pitch a tent and wait on him"
This is 100% accurate. Very descriptive of a Bulls' hesitation.
All we ask...."Please give us some time to get there."
You have no idea how many times I have wanted to take things slow just to be presented with...
1. Make a decision right away or lose me....
Chances are....we will choose the ladder...the back door...and yes, you will lose us!
At times, I was just as bold to assert that they keep their options open.
We're stubborn bulls, remember.
We're always looking for escape routes.
Try this instead.
Tell us what you don't like.
" It would be nice if you call me every once in awhile. I love hearing your voice."
"You have one more time to flake on me. I can respect the fact that you don't want to be in a relationship right away...that's cool, But I will be dam%ed if I let you mistreat me! Either tighten up in this area, or get the f*ck out!"
Both attempts will be very successful.
You're honest. Showing interest. And you're no doormat! It lets us know that you're sincere about being with us long-term...
We never invest ourselves emotionally in someone who isn't willing to fight for us long-term.
Quitters are weak.
The brave stand strong!
ConfusingCancer is also correct about routine.
Put us in our place without forcing us to make a decision. And we will get used to the idea of attempting to change our ways. If we're really feeling you, will will become more flexible.
Yeah, well, he certainly knows that I am no doormat but I should not have forced the issue and asked for a decision. I guess I just did not see it as a decision but a re-affirmation or reassurance to me that we were still on the same path.
In any case, I am keeping it light and trying to keep the door open because I don't want him to feel like I am closing any doors. If it's not romance, friendship is great as well and I have always said that.
I guess I am just trying to figure out if he has closed the door and I should move on and I can only go on clues. I am going to keep sending little reminders that I exist and either he will make it very clear by rejecting me or we can slowly get back to normalcy. Time will tell I guess. Any other hints to help me on my way?
Hints to help you on your way.....
1. Send a text saying that you're thinking about him.
2. Call, but never leave a message.
3. Crack a joke or two (Bulls are hilariously funny. We will suprise you).
4. Be real affectionate. We may not require lots of attention, but we do crave affection. If you can't get the words out, or have trouble communicating with him, touch his hand, caress his face, smile with your eyes, and kiss his him lovingly.
5. Be honest. At all times. We're guarded and closed off to fake pretentious liars. Let him see the 'real' you, not a carbon copy of a fictitious personality.
6. Have some level of indepedence outside your relationship. Bulls are workaholics, and will require an understanding partner who isn't going to nag about wanting constant attention.
Thank you! I will continue to send little reminders not too often and maybe some clarity will occur.
I have been 'seeing' my taurus man for approx 5months. I am a Scorpio woman and we were strangely attracted to each other instantly. It has mainly been about sex but over the last 3 or so months things have become different.
I have caught him looking at me when I'm not looking, even caught him watching me sleep! ( not in a creepy way!!) He strokes me and encases me when we sleep by wrapping himself around me - this is making my heart melt! I am hopeless around him though because I never know where I stand - he had shown some signs of possessiveness towards me which I've heard is a sign that he cares - he has also invited me over and we've just hung out and when it comes to bed time, we've just fallen asleep in each others arms.
He calls me 'baby' and recently went on holiday with his mate for a month after texting me at the airport before he left telling me he 'would see me soon... And to 'be good ;)'
Help!! Am I reading into this too much? I just can't figure him out - its feels like a fire when we're together but then I won't hear from him for 3 or 4 days. I always give in and text him or call him -to which he always responds positively. He has initiated long chats on the phone occasionally too... I guess I just want some insight of there is anyone who can provide it! His Birthday is 16/05/2012 and me 8/11/83.
Thanks in advance for your replies!
We Taurus are about routine...It seems like you've boxed yourself into the routine of communicating with him first, you take the time to write and he responds. This is quiet normal. I'm like this...I would rather someone write me versus me write them because it shows that they care enough to take the time to see how I'm doing.
It sounds like your doing good. Just keep it up. Why are you freaking out? Do you want more? If so I would just tell him flat out that you want to be his, and only his. We Taurus will give you a straight answer.
hope this helps.
Thank you for your response - guess I'm freaking out cause despite what I say to other people I do want more deep down and I am worried that he doesn't want the same and if I say something I risk pushing him away. However despite how much thiis whole 'slow steady taurean' pace is killing me, it's also good to build a proper foundation for the potential of something more, in that we really get to know each other.. When I read my last post back to myself it kinda all points to him liking me in the way I think he does - I guess I just want someone to confirm it from a new point of view..and to know I'm not imagining all this!!
You say I'm doing good which is reassuring, just need to know if I'm wasting my time or not - which I suppose only he can tell me... I'm falling for him which is dangerous ground!! Surely my intuition can't be wrong!? I'm a Scorpio for goodness sake lol.
Hi Confusing Cancer,
I have been totally loving your posts on Taurus men. I began dating one about a month ago and I adore him but, yes, he's the "typical Taurus" I guess lol. Luckily, I have been doing all of your suggestions from the get go and have been getting a great response from him, so it was refreshing to read I have been making the right moves! We dated for 1 month before I decided to sleep with him and I probably would have waited a bit longer but knew I would be out of town for a few months (I'm a senior in college and spending time abroad for the summer) and didn't want to wait that long, the unfortunate part is when I return we will only have a few weeks together because he is going overseas to visit his family for 6 weeks. so my issue is that he has already been a bit of a handful (doesn't express his feelings a lot) and frankly I do think he's the one but I don't want the distance and bad timing to ruin anything between us, so how can I keep him interested and the fire going while we're apart without seeming smothering? He does tell me everyday he likes me, misses me etc. after only 3 weeks of dating he told me that I was is and he likes me... (which I had a hard time believing because it was so soon but I trust him and went w it) and made me promise to be true. so ya I guess that's my question. Sorry for the super long post. I'd appreciate anyone's input on this can help. Thanks
Hello everyone, i am an aquarius and saw a taurean man. he invited me to a party and on our first date he brought his ex girlfriend. he then started to fight with her about her having a new boyfriend. when i try to tell him about how much this situation hurt me and i dont think he moved out of the relationship with her he deny it and start to calling me names.
I pulled away from him after our first date but he start heavily pursuing me, telling me he is in love with me and i am stupid to stop things with him.
i met everyone in his life and present me as the future wife.
After a very bad fight with him, where i kick him his now using this to say how bad i am and i am not right but he still want to see me but he just want me to comply to his demand and behave nicely without him : 1. hearing my concern. 2. wanting or even thinking to make any change
I Gave up completely, this is the first BULL i dated and really bull or whatever sign he is this is simply not worth it.
We kept in touch all this time, his text and calls reduced enormously, from thousands to a penny.
He will txt me a very short txt every week and when i reply or thinking we can sort something out he then stop replying for weeks to repear again.
If i speak about any issue, he just disconnect
his now insisting to be friends but i do not see the point as if we had friendship in first place we wont be here no?
so what the point to continue, we seem to have nothing in common.
I GaVE UP i hate this kind situation and his mood change is just break each time my recovery, i decided to let him know that i am changing my number and block him from my life and move on with better things
It's simply boring, like the guys before mention, you get lock inside a ROUTINE that become comfortable to them to be and they get use to. Even the cycle doesnt look good they may actually find safety in that routine therefore changing your move put him out balance
My MOTO is , play no games, wake away, life is just too short to wait for someone to recognise what he got and to wait for him to make up his mind when there is so many other people out there more exiting then a old boring BULL
I closed the door with ease today, no regret, no hope, no resetment , I CAME to realise and to remember i am worth more then the sad situation i find myself with him
I refuse to get myself involved with a guy that i am not even sure if his over his ex, for me his not
he has all the pictures with her on his facebook and on front picture and he tells me nothing is going on
Ladies, follow your instinct and get out
It's not our damn job to wait for a man to make up his mind
someone that come strong and then reduce his attention is simply not real to me.
Who ever you met or whatever the situation you met, Remember who you are and stay close to what you think you deserve
if you think you deserve to wait around for a guy, thats what you get
if you think his the only man that you can have then thats what you get
In way it's not even faire sometimes to Blame the GUY as GUY they are babies, they follow what you show them you need
if you dont know how much you worth, they also wont know
This is my first BULL but like any man , you need to know your worth, it;s not him the issue whatever he does, But you need to face the fact that it's you the issue
If you dont get what you need from someome, a man or a situation you need to face the fact that you also have 50% responsibility in what is happening or maybe sometimes 100% responsibility
You need to remmeber that you cannot change him or convince him you are the one, YOU can only change you
I am in love , i am deeply in love with the BULL but his behaviour in many levels is bring pain to me and i LOVE MYSELF more then him to not allow him or any men to treat me this way
The Hell with it all.
When a man treat you bad , he may not do it to hurt you but after you tell him, he knows then how you feel about it and if he still do it, you need to dish him right there.
His not worth your attention then
And if you decide to stay around and he still dont call much, no txt much, no respond much, no remember you much,m confuse you PLEASE LADIES, give him what he need
LEAVE HIM ALONE., he dont need you now and now is your life then say goodbye
I left him and like every woman out there, it hurt me, i miss him, i want him to love me, i want to fix things but i dont tell him that i deal with my need of him, my pain
I give headache to my friends talking about this dead relationship that is DOOM
Basicly i got through things over and over again, making myself sick of it, opening my eyes,
it's like eating chocolate and to stop when you get sick of it
You kind need to remind yourself what was the dream when you met and what you got NOW
Need to remind yourself WHO you are? What your worth and what The guy you dreamed is.
YES, and you see it, you remember, you get it, this is not the situation you dreamed for yourself, THIS is not the MAN you dreamed to be with, at lease not a man that treat this way, with ignorance, forgetting you, and just withdraw his love for you NO
LIKE YOU ALL i suffer, LIKE YOU ALL i get hurt when i am loosing the man that catched my heart but i remind myself that any man that get my heart better treat it really good
It's not all about catching it, it also about how you take care of it and this STUPID BULL never care for it
it's time, really time today to take back what is mine and should be given to someone that care more about it
LOVE YOURSELF when no one see what you worth, dont despear you worth more,
Close the door, cry,scream, know with time all pass and all get better
A man that love you should never force you to choose between your love for him and the love you have for yourself
No MEN out there is worth for you to lose yourself
HE came alone because he saw how shiny and wonderful you are and NOW, he dare to make you wait, no baby i have not time for you to remember me
I find Taurus men are very very stubborn and sometimes go into a state of denile when it comes to feelings, facts and emotions. I found out a month ago my former who I was trying to reconcile with had been dating this guy for a month. He is constantly asking me if I have any hot dates and what my plans are for the weekend. He has told me twice that he thinks about me every minute of the day. Yet he is still seeing this guy. So now he finds out that I have a friend from Atlanta coming into town to spend the long weekend with and he's upset. I have had a few Taurus men on here tell me he's pocketing me or thinking of me as back up if this doesn't work out. Who knows but I am backing off and not making myself so available.
MasCancer, yes got the same things happening me too few days ago. That Taurus guy keep contacting me and ask me if we can meet up , be friend etc....when i agree to be friend he then get upset i agree, he txt me all day and i reply and from nowhere tell me i am txt him too much and he will call police if i txt him again and he now got a girlfriend.
i stop txt him when 3 hours later he txt me some hot proposing txt that tells me how much he want to see me tomorrow etc...
when the next day i agree to meet to see what happen he now say you too crazy for me to meet you.
I thought Gemini man was difficut but had no idea that Taurus man were harder
I know his really dating someone else has his attention reduced greatly. he know txt me very short txt and only when he feel his losing out he txt me a bite more but i do know his seeing someone else.
the way i see this guy is, he cant face his feeling, he live in deny and he switch between liking me and be upset at me or something
i sometimes feel i am dealing with two people, one child and one adult o something
his so immature
i totally gave up as it's not going nowhere with this guy, on top his now with someone else so why bother.
It was his birthday no longer ago and he asked me to get him a puppy , explaining its really what he need to be good in his life.
he contact me only to mention the puppy and i went alone with it to know how far he want to use me or something.
i offer to pay for the puppy from far and not to meet but still he want to meet and go on trip to look for dog and i feel his not contacting me about the dog
well for me whatever is his reason i dont really care as if he got a girlfriend that the end of it
Star2u ... Your Taurus sounds more bi polar than mine. I think my former has issues stemming back from his childhood and upbringing. the closer her gets emotionally, the more scared he gets and he pulls away physically. Being intimate and happy scares the crap out of him. I did pull back for a couple weeks when I found out he was seeing this guy and he hated it. He ended up getting a puppy. Sounds familiar?
I think he is still very emotionally attached to me and this other guy is the fun physical thing. I posted on my facebook page I couldn't wait until my friend came into town for this long weekend. He text me wanting to know who he was ... He was grumpy the rest of the day. When my friend is in town ... I'm not going to text him at all. You can't let him have his cake and eat it too!
star2u ... if your man text or calls you, don't answer right away. The key to Taurus men is .. if you totally cut off contact ... they will just cut you out! you just can't be there for there every whim.