Dear Cris1962, you asked for a reading. . . .

  • Hi Cris,

    As for being with your friend, she needs you now. It would be highly beneficial and healing for you to do something different in order to gain more balance to your life.

    As far as the man you love goes, I have a story for you. Yes, just for you.

    When I was a freshman in college, my roommate fixed me up with a friend of hers over New Years' weekend because he was going to be shipped out to Vietnam the following week. Naturally, it was a blind date, a so-so night topped off with in invitation for the next night's New Year's Eve bash at his cousin's house. I went, had fun, came home and left for college on Sunday, having no feelings whatsoever about the weekend beyond having had a good time.

    When I got to the dorm, he was waiting for me, taking me into his arms in a huge bear hug that took my breath away. When he returned home, we talked on the phone for hours, and then he left for Vietnam on that following Tuesday. We exchanged addresses, and sure enough, a week later, my mailbox was full of his letters.

    In the first letter, he told me all about his plans for the future, how he'd changed his life insurance to name me his heir, bought a car for me in his hometown, how we'd be married when he came home. . . and I freaked out. I had not been away from home for six months, and here was this stranger planning my life for me. To him, we were engaged.

    Immediately, I wrote him back telling him I was not ready, at all, to be married to someone I did not even know. Writing to a soldier was one thing, but marriage? Needless to say, I kept dating and writing to him, never suspecting this situation would turn out to be the most haunting of my entire life.

    Not a day passed that I did not receive a letter. He must have written every day and on some days, wrote more than once. Gradually, so gradually that I did not realize what was happening, I began to fall in love with this man I did not know except through his letters.

    Six weeks after receiving his first letter, I had my very first vision. There was the jungle, and he'd been wounded. In the vision, he leaned down and kissed me on the forehead, telling me not to worry. He would return safe and sound. Ten days later, I got a letter from the red cross unit where he was in hospital, recovering from wounds received from shrapnel. He had been behind the guy who stepped on a claymore.

    When he found out I'd been dating other guys, he made a conscious decision to use heroin and all sorts of drugs available to the soldiers in Vietnam, blaming me for his addiction to one and all. When he came home on leave for R&R, he shot up in front of me, his brothers and friends. We were all in shock, never having seen such a thing.

    He never officially broke up with me. Instead, he would keep tabs on where I moved and visit me, out of the blue, after not having seen or heard from him in months or years, at times. He stayed in my life for 10 years, and I never had one dream about him during all those years.

    I tried everything to get in touch with him again and once succeeded in letting him know that I always loved him. At that, his whole demeanor changed, and the craziness of being married to someone neither of us loved (did we do it out of spite?) was overwhelming. Helplessly, I could only clear the air by explaining that middle of the night phone calls when he is drunk do not count as real communication. Unannounced visits only left me shocked and too numb to think coherently, and trying to explain my feelings an impossible task to someone whose sole interest in life was in getting high. What proof had I that he cared about me?

    Twenty-five years later, in June, 2006, my mother casually informed me that BD had died six months earlier. By then, I was going through a very emotionally draining marriage on the rocks and trying to find a lawyer when my mother told me of his death. Shock waves of horrified anger flowed through me at the outright betrayal by my own mother, who knew better than anyone how I felt about BD.

    Thirty-five years later, by chance, I happened upon his death certificate, which gave me all of the answers to questions I had not spoken aloud. Not long afterward, I had a dream about him.

    In the dream, I entered through a door opened by his mother, and in shocked surprise found myself in her living room with all of her son's medals and framed newspaper articles, trophies, books and every award he had ever earned in life. She then showed me my wedding trousseau, and told me how he had set it all up to surprise me. There, in that small, plain room was the gown of my dreams, complete with flowing train, lace and pearls.

    With his mother, stunned astonishment robbed me of speech, but the moment he appeared, it was as if he had never been away. He looked the way I liked best with the blond streaks in his long hair and the gap-toothed grin under his sparse mustache lighting up his face with happiness.

    In the dream, we talked for hours. He told me of all the things I would encounter in my life and how I would fare, and he wanted to protect me from future pain. He wanted us to have a spiritual marriage in heaven, showing me all that he had discovered and how beautiful an after-life could be with the right person. He showed me how to "redecorate" my "world" and gave me tours of all he discovered. He was like a child with a new toy, and while I followed him, I kept repeating, "But I'm not dead, yet!"

    As much as I loved him, I could not turn my back on life. No matter how it turned out, he did not have the right to take it away from me, even if it meant allowing me to suffer in my life as a live human being. "I must be allowed to live out my days," I told him. "I will always love you. No one can take that away from me." To that, he replied, "I will be waiting."

    Then, I woke up and wrote it all down. I had no doubt, at all, that this dream was a message.

    So, Cris, no matter how you may suffer now, you should follow your instincts. Let this man you love know and understand how much you love him and how you feel. Even if things don't seem to work out right away, God knows our hearts and will never let us down. Our prayers ARE answered, just not when it is very convenient for us.

    These once-in-a-lifetime loves are like miracles when questions are answered and provided in such a way that you have no doubt if things had been different, the two of us would have been together. With my love, I was blessed with visions and clairsentience. That was the beginning for me. How it will all end--only God really knows.

  • It' 38 years this December. I got my years mixed up and it reads kinda odd at one point.

  • Oh dear, this should be made into a movie - while I apologise for putting this story in such a crass category, but, gee ... it's overwhelming and bitter-sweet and the stuff block-buster movies are made of. I guess though, that you know he'll be waiting for you on the other side when your time comes, as our true soulmates always are. But honestly, it is so frustrating for me to hear these stories sometimes! I often wonder: where are the tales of soulmates actually connecting and staying together? Why on earth do these pairings rarely happen? I have read the facts about this sort of thing; read so many books on the topic, yet still I can't figure out why on earth we are presented with these encounters, only to have them leave our lives. Still, maybe it's a gift that we are given, but it takes a long time to actually see their leaving us as an actual gift. I am also beginning to doubt that soulmate relationships actually exist on the earth plane.

    In my case, well, he knows now how I feel, but sadly I was forced into this by a situation that cropped up by accident (something I'd written got found by my husband and you can imagine the fireworks that flew after that. This thing I'd written was a vent and not something I was planning to send or show anyone; it had been ripped up and thrown in a bin, but not hidden well enough obviously).

    His reaction was what one would expect, given these circumstances. No, he hadn't had any of the dreams I'd been having. No, there was nothing between us, now or in the future (this was all said to my husband mind you). I won't go into the rest of the story, but suffice to say, the reading I had last week actually refuted what he said - that I didn't get the real truth - and I'm told there is a future for the two of us - more bizarrely, my "life partner" would turn up in December (and the psychic said she was 90% sure it was the one I've dreamed of). I am separating from my husband as we speak; just waiting on a house to come up, as I can't stay with him after all this; it isn't fair to either of us. Friends we are, have always been and hopefully, always will be. You were right when you said our marriage had withered on the vine. Sadly, I don't have the emotional energy to "water the vine" so to speak anymore. This marriage has been a wonderful friendship for the most part, but an actual marriage? Well, not really. But we tried; very hard indeed I can tell you.

    So, I'm just in between trying to move on from this dream-fellow really as readings are readings after all, arent' they? I don't want to live my life in the hope he didn't tell the truth and that he'll turn up on my doorstep and profess his "lie" and undying love for me. Gah. That doesn't happen in real life, at least not from what I hear. Yet a small part of me really does keep hoping, just that little bit ...

    I'm now tapping my feet, waiting for things to happen (I've managed to at least get the ball rolling) but stumbling blocks keep turning up which is very frustrating, especially with Christmas looming.

    So that's part of my sorry tale my friend.

    I appreciate hearing yours, even though it has ripped my heart out reading it. And I repeat what I said above: where are the stories of soulmates which actually connect on the earth plane and stay together successfully? I'd love to know ...

    Thanks so much! If you have any further insights, please let me know. My future seems to be hanging in the balance at the moment, as I think you'd appreciate 🙂

  • The wonderful thing about life is that it never fails to surprise us in the final inning. Stuff we personally thought would never happen shows up to test our resourcefulness and test our faith.

    I never thought I'd end up on a dating service just to find a guy who's not a felon or a pervert. Just shows we must do our best, have faith and allow God to create miracles that we cannot perform on our own.

    I, too, married in haste and lived to regret it. Marriage is not for friendship. Even though I am now friends with two of my exes, I still yearn to marry for love and have him feel the same way. As long as you are married, you are limited in what you are able to do. Time has a way of striking while the iron is hot.

    Somehow, I know it will all work out for the best.

  • Yep, I feel that too 🙂 And agree with what you say about marriage limiting what you can do. I've said to hubby that this is a necessary move as staying together is preventing both of us from finding the happiness we deserve. He poo-pooed that at first, but I think he's seeing what I mean now. We've fought so long and hard for this marriage and I got to thinking this year that a marriage surely shouldn't be so much work, not when one considers the other influences in life that put strain on a relationship. Yet it has shown me one thing: that both of us, as individuals, are made of very stern stuff and will dig our heels in and fight to the death of we have to. Sometimes though, that can be the thing which stops a person from seeing the real truth of a situation. Sometimes, as sad as it can be, giving up on something is what is needed to move on. As I said to hubby ages ago, let's not flog dead horses just because of a band of gold.

    We'll just look forward to the good times, eh? And yes, time does have a way of striking while the iron is hot. I think I just forgot to plug the bleeding thing in!! GOOD LUCK and thanks :))

  • Oh my goodness this is deep. Cris I have come to the conclusion that a soul mate isn't on this side. They are on the otherside but you may find a kindred spirit here. Now that feels right to me. And I have read several things and I do agree with Sylvia Browne because it feels right. Kind of you just know things. Hard to explain to someone else but you know? Make sense to you, somewhat?

  • I fell things happen when they are suppose to and people come into your life when its time and they aren't always going to be there for ever. Sometimes you out grow each other and move on in your own paths because you have fulfilled what you are here to do with that person. Your life path doesn't give any promises of undying love or companionship. Its a learning path and what ever choices you make is how long you may take to learn or help someone else learn. Oh I hate getting this deep sometimes. Peace and harmony, and cris get my information from Wenchie we will talk.

  • Okay 🙂 Deep is good ... sometimes :)))) My main problem is being sick of constant disappointment. A good friend said years ago "never expect anything" and I see what he means. But we're human after all, and I find it very difficult to not look forward to things, or have expectations, even though I see that my wise friend was right. I just wonder if he sticks to what he says though ... wouldn't know ... he'd be somewhere in Japan or God knows where chasing that illusive "perfect woman" ... go figure!!

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