OK I married a VIRGO



  • Hey!!

    This is out to whomever wants to give an opinion

    I married a wonderful Viirgo man............however I am a Gem and that is a problem. We are both drama queens/kings.

    Needless to say our marriage had its low point when I found out he was agressively pursing a young woman.

    I found out. We got sued by her. It was consensual. We almost lost everything cause of his/her antics.

    I am trying to re build myself so that it does not happen again. Men cheat more so than women. Men are just wired differently. I am not saying all MEN cheat. WOmen cheat too. I don't know any that have but I know they do. However women generally don't try to crash a marraige and a business over it. He very purposefully waged war on ME. Tried everything he could ot OUST me from the business I worked so hard to build with him, our home and in the process maligned me to his family and HIS ex wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    He made promises to me..........so far he has not made good on some of the things he promised. I found out he has another private e mail account...............accidently. I would not be anxious about it but he and this girl were actively pursuing each other VIA e mail and I found thsoe e mails and of course the rest is history.

    I discoevered those e mails. Busted him in front of our therapist. I forgave him and have moved on. He is working hard in the marriage.

    Now that I find the private e mail account I wonder what he is up to. We both work on line . My question is folks and I want MEN to respond too. Ones that haven't cheated please.........

    WHat do you suppose my husband is doing with this secret account??????? His kids are in the next state. He rarely talks to my family unless we have a get togehter...........

    He promised me no more secret e mail accounts..........no telling our intimate relationship issues to his grown kids...................like he did when he was pursuing the girl.

    All his friends are in other states. He rarely goes out alone. He seems reluctant to go places without me. I am always wanting him to go away and travel to see his brother. ALONE!!! We work out of our home. I like having my house to myself once in a while.

    So why does he have a secret e mail account? Who is he e mailing that he requires a secret account. HE NEVER TOLD ME ABOUT IT. As I said I am playing fair.....I found this screen name when my pc went down and had to go to the shop for a week. I asked him If I could use his computer to check my personal account and he was sitting right next to me when I did it and wham his screen name popped up. He knows I have a YAHOO account because I told him I set it up. I set this account up last summer.

    I don't spend alot of time thinking about it. I want to live my life and enjoy the summer with or without him. We get along and work ok together.....I have a life beyond my marriage. He works alot.

    But what is up with his secret account? He has NEVER DISCLOSED this account to me. He has a sketcy track record. His dalliance has done alot of damage to us financially and emotionally . It's funny he doesn't look or act like the type to cheat. I told close friends and they were shocked. I do notice he is exptrmely needy emotinally. He is always questioning me regarding my whereabouts. I usually don't respond. When he starts to obscess over it I just remind him I don't cheat, I am not doing things that are bad for us, me or our marriage. He is a VIRGO. CONTROL CONTROL CONTROL. These days I seldome engage in any theatrics. It hasn't been that long. The affair was less than a year ago. The wounds are still fresh. I refuse to let him control me or my comings and goings. But that secret e mail he has hmmmmmmmmm. Did he forget to tell me about it??????????? Why would he need it if he is on the up and up as he says........

    Thoughts???

    Catamaniac



  • Well i'm sorry about your situation. I am a gem too and was in an 8 year relationship with a virgo man. It ended really bad i haven't spoken to him in two years and have no intention to ever do. He cheated on me, lied to me, made promises he never kept, had secret relationships with women(online) and was flirting with anything that moved, if i ever call him out he'd manipulate the situation and twist it as if i am imagining things and it's all my fault, if i get on with my life and don't pay too much attention to him he'd burn my phone accusing me of things. I was very young and naive so it took me a very long time to see the truth.

    Your situation doesn't seem that much different so If i was you i'd run away. Sorry to say that but it doesn't look very good and having a long painful experience with a virgo man i think you are probably better off without him. Anyway hope this helps a bit.



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  • Well I am in no position to leave. Thank GAWD we don't have kids. But we have 4 wonderful felines.

    These days I put up with him but I have NO use for his drama. He seems to understand I have kinda given up on him. As far as physcial stuff...........I sleep in my den.

    Virgos seem to be such freakin morality types. they are ust weak little babies and judge everyone else quite harshly. I am smart and will just live my life around him.

    I have things to do and a business to run. That is what keeps me occupied. If I meet some guy I can't live without I just may take the plunge. I am not adverse to it.

    THanks for your thoughts

    Cat



  • Yes. I do agree. and YES I will talk to him about this secret account and let you know what happens.

    Many thanks

    Cat



  • Redgem

    It scares me that you went through the same thing...........Virgo men are train wrecks. He is truly a drama queen. I know all men aren't like him. But jeepers.........he loves drama and can create it out of NOTHING. He is incessantly picky picky.

    As I said to some other wise person I work and have a life away from him I am in no financial postion to leave. But if I meet someone along the way I just may not be able to say NO.

    IN the meantime I am going to ask him about his secret e mail account tomorrow.

    THanks

    Cat


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