ASCLAC part 3



  • well not working... dont understand what denied dimensions are... anyone any idea?



  • Aries and I have been talking a bit today...going well

    SV -

    You were on the money lol i think that's why I pushed my questions towards you

    He didn't realize there was an agreement...I'm going to spend the night with him tonight and try to explain it to him and listen to what he has to say

    I'm also excited to see all the pictures he took on his trip lol

    I have a busy day at work everyone, I'll have to catch up tomorrow, won't be around tonight



  • katie -

    the pictures need to be 400 pixels wide by 800 pixels high. you can edit them in Paint (mspaint.exe in the system folder) there should be an option to shrink it inside paint, you'll have ot do some math though because it's in percentages lol



  • LOL Kel, where i have to use math is where i give it up. hahahahaha it's past 9pm, no way im gonna count. can i forward them to you and you do the counting??? hahahahaha im gonna do it all when i came home or maybe tomorrow. 🙂

    glad to hear things seem to be going fine with aries. 🙂 have a nice time with him.



  • yea you can send em, i'll do the math lol i like numbers 🙂



  • I was good for a few days...actually for like a good two weeks I think? too bad he creeped back into my brain again today...ugh...

    I DIDN'T text him for his bday though...I was actually sitting at home, all alone, and I had turned on the TV but I was like "God and or some spiritual being who loves me, seriously, I've been thinking about this all day. If I’m not supposed to text him happy birthday, just give me a sign..ANY sign. I just don’t want to do something stupid and get my hopes up. But if I’m supposed to or if it’s not going to hurt me, then I will go ahead and send him a small cute message”…..my tv screen immediately went out. No reception…no nothing…I was like huh?? It was almost immediate…there was my sign….so I didn’t send him anything and didn’t think once more about it….weird huh?

    Anyway….i just wanted to share my story along with take a break for just a minute since he’s on my mind again…again….



  • Hey moon, you continue to crack me up..I'm stuck right now at 96 lbs btw..I lose about 1/2 a lb a week..don't now if I'll make it to 86..maybe 92 again, my abs are starting to show, but I need more definition!

    Fanclubs, yes, I have several. When I worked at this resort , sort of like a Club med, there was this whole group o fiilppino guys that worked there that actually formed a fan club "Lua's Fan club" They would all get excited and wave and smile when I walked by. Now I've got a group of beach boys at the beach that have a fan club. I'm the Queen of the local beach, lol!

    Crab sent me an email saying his mom sent him some chocolate from Brazil for his B-day and he doesn't eat chocolate any more and wanted to know if I want him to send it to me..yeah, right, so it can get here by October? Well, at least that'll be after the competition. I do love Brazilian chocolate but I think it'll melt. I think they let things sit at the dock here for days. He's going to Manila again tonight. Why does it bother me when he goes to Manila? A year ago this weekend was the first time we met in Manila and it was super hot and heavy....I need to just go out and have fun and stop thinking about this, stop wishing things could be as it was a year ago..



  • UPDATE Or is it really an "update"???? Well, we're right back where we started. After all that he said over the weekend about being "open" to dating and a relationship AND wanting to court me, we go right back to him going back into his shell. I'm sorry but I don't care what your astrological sign is, but if you REALLY like someone and REALLY intrigued by them, do you practically ignore their texts and treat them like they have the plague. It's been 4 weeks and with everything HE said last weekend, its just not adding up for me. I'm REALLY trying to be patient, trust me I am and that's very hard to do for a Scorpio! LOL But how SLOOOOOOWWWW does he want to take this thing??? Besides, I don't care how slow you want to take something, it's called COMMON COURTESY to reply someone's text message, and if you do reply, do it within a reasonable time! UGH!!!!



  • SCC - ok have some down time today at work so I'm going to respond to you. I am going to try and go back and copy/paste as much as I can, but if possible. please give me a gist of everything that's happened. so far, it seems to be almost EXACTLY like the situation I was in...so I'm pretty sure I know you're solution and/or answers. Me, being another scorp woman, might be able to give you insight into the INSANITY that goes on in this situation...there's a light at the end of the tunnel, SCC. I promise....I haven't reached there yet...but I promise you, it's there...gimme your story if you can. in the mean time, i'll go back and see what I can find. 🙂



  • hey Lua - did he ever respond to your bday message?? lol YUMM, 4 months old chocolate sounds awesome! hahahahaha...he's somethin else!



  • uh...I meant SSC...you know what I mean, lol!



  • SV- I know it's a long post, but I just copy and pasted. 🙂

    I'm a scorpio female and my male suitor is a cancer. He lives "nearby" to me and he would keep looking at me at the pool. About 3 weeks ago, I saw we had a mutual friend of Facebook so I sent him a funny little message on FB saying "Hey, you look familiar". Well he immediately replied and requested me as a friend. So that weekend I saw him at a local bar and we hit it off immediately. He's been separated for a year and divorce isn't final because of scheduling issues. Anywho, well, we went back to his place (his suggestion) for a drink or two. Well, we kissed and it was fantastic. He's a really "deep" person like me (Scorpio hahaha). He admitted that he looked at me at the pool for "validation" that I was interested. So the next day at the pool, I went over to him and we talked but I could tell he was "distant" so I went back inside but he invited me over that evening to watch a movie. So I did but he was really "distant". So after that I didn't really hear from him for a few days. Then the next Saturday, he was at the pool and struck up a convo with me and even introduced me to his kids (they are teens). We all hit it off well. He asked if I would like some company that evening. I agreed. So he came over and we hung out. He started asking me what I was looking for and I told him that I was just looking to see where things go. He said basically the same but that he wasn't looking for a relationship or dating because he wasn't "ready". I was cool with that. He even admitted he was afraid of getting hurt. So the next day at the pool, he didn't even come speak to me. I went and spoke to him but friendly. I had invited him to go some friends of mine this past Sat night for a cookout and he was all for it. So Friday night, I stopped by his condo to say hey (he told me the first night we met that I could stop in anytime). We had a LOOOOOONNNNNGGGGG talk about us and general stuff. Long story short, he says he doesn't want to hurt me because he doesn't want to feel my pain. He even asked me how I would feel if when I had come over if he was on a date with someone else. I was like ????...I just told him I would be disappointed because he hasn't even taken me on a date. He understood that. Then I asked him how he would feel if I said that I couldn't take the confusing mixed signals anymore and walked out and never come back...he said that he would be extremely hurt but would respect that. He also told me that he goes into his "shell" and it has nothing to do with me and nothing to do with his interest level in me because he is really interested in me. So Sat rolls around, we go to the cookout and we had a great time. Except for the fact that he was talking to this girl that he had only known for 5 min and she was talking to all of us and he was very "open" with her, more than he had been with me in 3 weeks! I was dumfounded. But yet he would still grab my hand and kiss me occassionally. I even asked him how he would feel if I dated another man and he said he would be extremely jealous but wouldn't have the right to say anything.

    Ok, there's much more detail to this story than I'm putting but I just hit the "highlights". So here's the jist of it...

    1. ALL THE MIXED SIGNALS!!! He says he doesn't want a relationship or dating BUT 50% of his actions match with his words and the other 50% don't match.

    2. He's made it clear to me on several occassions that he's a member of a dating site to get "validation". Am I not validation enough????

    3. I am typical Scorpio and take some of his "shellness" to blame. Because when he does come out of his shell, I go right into deep discussions. I don't do it intenionally or disrespectfully but I am a Scorpio. HAHAHA

    So what's the advise?? Ask any questions that you must to get clarification. Thanks

    Hi Koky, is it draining or what??? I try to remain calm and clear about it. Like I said, he's told me not to take his "needing space and quietness" as an indicator as he's not interested BUT how can I not?! LOL It's only been about 2 weeks and we've only hung out 5 times, of which I initiated 3 of those times to hang out. I haven't chased him at all. I don't have any intentions on contacting him this week at all. I'm going to pursue other options and see where it goes. I'm sure once he sees pics posted on FB of me, my friends and other guys out, he will become infuriated. Trust me, I'm not doing it to make him jealous. I'm just not going to keep myself so readily available to him. My birthday is November 13, 1972 and his is June 28, 1970. I feel sometimes like I'm in the middle of doing the line dance, the cupid shuffle. One step forward, two steps back, one step to the right, one step to the left. GOOD GRIEF!! LOL

    Ok, to catch you up with the last 48 hours of information. Yesterday, he posted several times on my fb, which he's NEVER done before!!! Plus, he stopped in front of my complex building while i was on the balcony, we live in the same complex, and rolled down his window to wave at me and spoke to me for a few min. He's never done EITHER of these things. Again, his words of not wanting a relationship, dating, etc., just don't seem to match up completely with his actions.

    Yea, he was even posting yesterday on FB too!! Even sent me a private message on there hoping that I was having a good week and basically detailed everything that I had posted on FB! LOL I wish I could text him but he turns his cell phone off at work (Don't ask, I have no idea! but has hinted around about calling him at work or emailing him at work but I want him to come for me not the other way around). I'm just kind of confused right now because I want to see him but I don't want to continue being the one who initiates the time we spend together.

    Ok, so now he's posting stuff on other girl's fb walls like "Next time you're in town look me up, blah, blah, blah" and then using the word "maybe" with me alot! Within one phone conversation or email, he'll go from "YEA, we can go do to this/that" to "Maybe, I'm not sure". I'm like WTHeck????? in my mind. Are cancer men known to do things to make women they are interested in jealous or is he interested in someone else now? I'm just so confused and drained. I'm on the edge of bowing out of the whole mind game/manipulation **** he's playing! UGH!

    I've been reading and reading and reading. I'm driving myself insane!! I don't necessarily stalk his fb but his stuff shows up on my newsfeed. But I do know that he stalks mine because of comments he's made face to face to me about my fb statuses. Ok, every day he drives by my condo, we live in the same complex, and he slows down almost completely to see if i'm on my balcony. This week he has stopped twice to talk to me from his car while I was on the balcony. So I'm thinking...FB sabatical, walking in the condo when I see him slowing up, and kind of just ignoring him. I know I deserve soooo much better. And his behavior shouldn't be tolerated!

    Sorry, I've been away all weekend, my computer went down. First of all, thanks for ALL the advice.

    So here goes, Friday I was off. His daughter was at the pool. She and I instantly bonded, spent ALL afternoon together. She opened up to me about her life, her likes, dislikes, etc. She was even giving me insights on her dad, Mr. Crab! LMAO When he got home, I could see the "shocked, surprised, happy face" when he saw she and I hanging out and bonding. She and I get along GREAT!!!!!! She even fussed at him because he wouldn't give me a definate answer about going out that night. She told him "DAD! It's either yes or no, NO POSSIBLY!!!" LOL He turned around and looked at me and said "Yes, if (insert my name) doesn't already have plans with other 'guys' at the club" and then smiled. I just looked at him with one raised eyebrow like, "WTH"??? I knew right then that's why he had been so wishy washy of whether or not he was going to go hang out with me and my friends Friday night because he was testing me to see how sincerely I was interested in him and how "faithful" I am. LOL So he took his kids to supper and then turned around and came back to my house while I got ready. ????? That was a first!! So then he told me that his daughter told him before he left "Dad, you know that this is just hanging out and listening to a band and NOT A DATE! You need to take her out on a REAL date!" HAHAHAHAHAHA That girl is a trip!! So fast forward to the rest of the night. He tried to kiss me at the club and I told him friends don't kiss 😉 He said "I thought we were more than friends" I said "You were the one who said we were just friends". Now, of course, I'm saying this in a flirty, teasing way. He said "First, I really like you. Second, I find you extremely intriguing. Third, I love spending time with you. And lastly, I'm really happy and shocked that you and my daughter bonded so quickly and so great." I told him that he was the one who said he wasn't looking or wanted a relationship/dating. He said that I "misunderstood" him and that he was open to a relationship and dating. Anyone else confused??????????? How can anyone misunderstand "not wanting/not looking" and "open to"??????? So anyways, as the night progressed, he told me that he wanted to "court" me and for us to get to know each other. I told him I'm game for anything, whatever makes him comfortable AS LONG AS WE are both comfortable at the pace. I don't mind going slow but the "rubberband affect" is not my style and I won't tolerate it. He explained that's not what he was trying to do, saying that it's been 15 years since he's "dated" or "courted" anyone and that this is all new to him. He said that he NEVER thought that he would already be going through and analyzing his feelings/emotions this early in the situation with me. So anywho, the night ended well. The next day, we hung out ALL day long!!!!! Then yesterday, a friend of mine came down to visit and I wanted him to meet her, so I sent a text saying she was there and what she I were gona do instead of what I had told him we had planned when I informed him on Saturday that she was going to be coming. Well, no reply from him. But he did however, stop by last night and waved and of course, his daughter practically climbs out the window to tell me bye! LOL She's so much like me!!!!!! :-)))) Anyways, he never called, never text UNTIL 11:00 last night with "sleep well....". I've yet to understand the whole "....." at the end of a text. Are they wanting a reply???? Well, needless to say, I didn't reply because I was already asleep and I haven't sent him a response yet.

    So that's my update. So when everyone can get their heads back on straight from all the confusion from above, tell me your thoughts/advice/opinions! 🙂



  • lol, I copy/pasted too...I have to give you a slight warning before you read on. I have been through this...I'm still trying to get OVER this...please don't take offense to anything I say. I truly am meaning well and I only want you to keep your sanity before you lose it completely! 🙂

    SSC>>I'm a scorpio female and my male suitor is a cancer. He lives "nearby" to me and he would keep looking at me at the pool. About 3 weeks ago, I saw we had a mutual friend of Facebook so I sent him a funny little message on FB saying "Hey, you look familiar". Well he immediately replied and requested me as a friend. So that weekend I saw him at a local bar and we hit it off immediately. He's been separated for a year and divorce isn't final because of scheduling issues.

    SV>>I believe that’s your first problem. He’s not completely divorced. Doesn’t matter if he’s a cancer or not, you don’t mess around with people who still have baggage. Who still are “attached” to someone else. You should have just stayed friends with him until it was COMPLETELY over.

    SSC>>well, we went back to his place (his suggestion) for a drink or two. Well, we kissed and it was fantastic. He's a really "deep" person like me (Scorpio hahaha). He admitted that he looked at me at the pool for "validation" that I was interested. So the next day at the pool, I went over to him and we talked but I could tell he was "distant" so I went back inside but he invited me over that evening to watch a movie. So I did but he was really "distant".

    SV>>him being “distant” at the pool should have been an indication that you shouldn’t have gone over to his house for the movie. When he was distant while you guys were watching a movie, it could be two things. He either had things on his mind, which could have been you but probably not…OR he wanted to watch the movie and you were just keeping him company.

    SSC>>after that I didn't really hear from him for a few days. Then the next Saturday, he was at the pool and struck up a convo with me and even introduced me to his kids (they are teens). We all hit it off well. He asked if I would like some company that evening. I agreed. So he came over and we hung out. He started asking me what I was looking for and I told him that I was just looking to see where things go.

    SV>>I have learned my lesson the hard way. Do not EVERRRRRR tell a cancer man that you want to “see where things will go”. You give clear cut answers. If you’re wishy washy with them, they’ll be even MORE wishy washy with you! by his actions, he’s not ready for ANY kind of relationship right now. His divorce isn’t even final. I’m sure that the separation has taken a toll on him. cancer’s are sensitive, and if it was the wife that asked for the divorce, he’s got some MAJOR issue that he has to work through himself. You cannot help him through that journey.

    SSC>>He said basically the same but that he wasn't looking for a relationship or dating because he wasn't "ready". I was cool with that. He even admitted he was afraid of getting hurt.

    SV>>lol, please read my answer above…

    SSC>>So the next day at the pool, he didn't even come speak to me. I went and spoke to him but friendly. I had invited him to go some friends of mine this past Sat night for a cookout and he was all for it. So Friday night, I stopped by his condo to say hey (he told me the first night we met that I could stop in anytime). We had a LOOOOOONNNNNGGGGG talk about us and general stuff. Long story short, he says he doesn't want to hurt me because he doesn't want to feel my pain. He even asked me how I would feel if when I had come over if he was on a date with someone else. I was like ????...I just told him I would be disappointed because he hasn't even taken me on a date. He understood that. Then I asked him how he would feel if I said that I couldn't take the confusing mixed signals anymore and walked out and never come back...he said that he would be extremely hurt but would respect that. He also told me that he goes into his "shell" and it has nothing to do with me and nothing to do with his interest level in me because he is really interested in me. So Sat rolls around, we go to the cookout and we had a great time. Except for the fact that he was talking to this girl that he had only known for 5 min and she was talking to all of us and he was very "open" with her, more than he had been with me in 3 weeks! I was dumfounded. But yet he would still grab my hand and kiss me occassionally. I even asked him how he would feel if I dated another man and he said he would be extremely jealous but wouldn't have the right to say anything. Then the other day, he posted several times on my fb, which he's NEVER done before!!! Plus, he stopped in front of my complex building while i was on the balcony, we live in the same complex, and rolled down his window to wave at me and spoke to me for a few min. He's never done EITHER of these things. Again, his words of not wanting a relationship, dating, etc., just don't seem to match up completely with his actions.

    SV>>this is sounding more and more like my situation. If I can give one piece of advice, RUN! He’s not READY for you or any other woman right now. It’s not you, really, it’s HIM. Maybe in the future he will be ready for a woman. But not AT ALL right now…I don’t even have to read the rest. I already know how this ends up…BACK AND FORTH. He doesn’t want a relationship, he doesn’t want to date you or get deeper with you. He wants to just have fun with you or any woman that comes along. He has things to figure out. He’s really hurt and there’s only one person who can help him and that’s himself... that’s IT. ugh…I hate to give you this kind of advice, but it’s the truth. This is exactly, and I mean EXACTLY my situation a few months back. And yet I STILL can’t get over mind. I know what I have to do, I know I have to get over him, but I can’t. you have to be a strong person SSC. You have to just leave him be. 😕 sorry….



  • oops, sorry, I posted without taking out spaces in between your story and my response. just look for the ">>" and you'll know where you or I start with a comment. sorry bout that!



  • oh Kel....I feel like you right now....this situation with SSC and me giving her advice is like you giving ME advice when I first joined the thread! lol

    Karmic circle...wonderrrrfuuullll!!!! I LOVE IT =D!!!!!



  • Yea, as much as it hurts, I know I've got to stay away from him. Even though his daughter has already bonded with me really great, I still have to draw a line with him (A REALLY BIG LINE!). I'm running, slowly but surely. It just tears me up that he told me Friday night that he wanted to "court" me and wanted us to enjoy the ride. Well, I'm not enjoying the ride.



  • I skimmed through, I wanted to give you an example to hopefully make his actions more clear-cut

    Sometimes when my Aries texts me (SSC you haven't been on this thread too long but he's my current bf, been dating about 3.5 months now), I just don't feel like responding

    Common courtesy doesn't matter, I just don't FEEL like it (not just to Aries though, sometimes to others too)

    BUT! because I care so much for him and I would rather like to avoid playing head games, I'll respond, even if it's just to say "ok"

    Another example, sometimes I don't feel like posting here but I fight that urge because all the friends I made on here are important, so i make an effort to communicate.

    So when you become important enough to him, he will respond even just out of common courtesy

    I should have read your story more closely, I didn't realize he was still married...like SV said RUUUNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    SV -

    I'm glad you're getting to help others now (like I'm seeing adventure girl doing too), this is HUGE! You will really begin to heal now, it wasn't until I started helping others that things really started to click for me



  • I want to clarify the "married" part. They have been separated for over a year and waiting hearing for final hearing. It is court scheduling issues, not him or her wanting to hold onto each other. He's purchased his condo, so I know he's "permanent".



  • SSC>>I want to clarify the "married" part. They have been separated for over a year and waiting hearing for final hearing. It is court scheduling issues, not him or her wanting to hold onto each other. He's purchased his condo, so I know he's "permanent".

    SV>>oh, ok. I dont think that changes my opinion though, unfortunately. he may be separated, but it doesn't justify his actions or the way he's thinking at the moment. you just have to leave him alone to heal and get over whatever demons he's got in his head right now. My cancer is the same way. he treated me the same way. he wasn't married, but something has happened to him and he won't face his problems. he keeps running away from them and he won't actually talk or thinking about the problems so there's no way he can heal. all I can do is move on and try to get over him. I honestly believe we had a deep connection as well. and maybe we did, but he didn't treat me right, ignored me, emotionally manipulated me, went back and forth with me, told me he wasn't looking for a relationship but his actions spoke different....etc....sound familiar? 😕



  • Hi all.... Ok, real quick... lolpet! I am not ignoring you ..lol.. Give me til tonight when I have time to respond. Sorry doll...

    SCC I can go HOURS/DAYS/WEEKS/MONTHS?YEARS with not talking to people. I LOVE them to death. L-O-V-E them! My BFF's...

    If I'm not in the mood... I'm not in the mood. Doesn't mean I don't like you less or I don't love you... just means I have a lot on my mind.

    I get "quiet"... especially when I am in deep thought or have a lot on my mind.... He's probably thinking things over about you!

    Ahhhhh.... purposeful silence....

    It was one of the big things Scorp always understood about me... and I him.

    Ok, gotta run, Bye!

    hey Kel & SV!

    Quick ps

    SV... that is SO F-ing strange with your TV! SOOOOOO strange.....

    Kel... I'm glad you're going to chit chat with Aries about that thing. I bet all will be fine.

    😉


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