Requesting help (Dear Captain please reply if u see this)



  • i got a reading from captain once a few years back and i suppose it turned out true.
    Dear captain requesting your guidance (and other learned members too) on my love situation.
    I met this wonderful man out of nowhere and developed an unexpectedly beautiful connection with hm almost instantly. We even ended up discussing marriage.
    The guy has always been very hot cold in and out due to his fears and commitment issues. Honestly he doesn't seem bad it's just he has fears. Or maybe i just cantsee the bad in him.
    I honestly have never experienced such a connection in my life before. It feels like a twin flame connection, if i may put such labels.
    On the 13th this month he decided to break up wit me and leave me for no damn reason. He walked out on me..ghosted me..hasn't even been texting me.
    This has left me in so much pain. From telling me he wanted to marry Me, now because of his irrational fears he's shutting me out lik this and whenever i ask for an explanation he just says i don't love you anymore.

    I'm utterly confused and very much in pain
    Please help me understand what exactly is this connection?? Will we be back together? And do we have long term potential as in can we get married?? Will we get married in the long term??
    Please help

    Below are our birth details

    Me
    Female
    2nd Oct 1997
    (Born on 12:31 Am of 1 oct. Hence dob is 2nd Oct)
    Born in new delhi india

    Him
    9 February 1994
    (born on 1:43 am of 8 Feb hence dob is 9 Feb)
    Born in tasgaon maharashtra india

    Please help me with this captain. I'm really hurting

    Thanks



  • @Mimi970453 this relationship can work out for marriage but both partners have to be prepared to work at it. And it seems for the moment your love interest is too scared of the intensity generated here. He also values his independence very much and tends to be overly self-critical and to under-value himself and his ability to maintain a relationship. He can be very inconsistent. He measures himself by an impossibly high ideal, perhaps comparing himself or the relationship to other people's. So if he feels headed towards failure, he will pull out of a relationship early without trying to make it better. This relationship contains a wellspring of energy that can be either used constructively or simply left to flood out of control. Thus this matchup may be characterized as a continual struggle on your part to harness your love interest's irrepressible energies. If you are to be successful, you must impose the necessary discipline - but the two of you can be highly effective in bringing this man's energy under control; in the best-case scenario, the result will be a merger of your know-how and his creativity. If you are unsuccessful, battles between you will rage, with neither side prepared to compromise.

    In your love affair, there will be a hint of the kind of idiosyncrasy of which the two of you are capable. Unusual, even peculiar practices may well emerge here, which you two are likely to accept as normal but which society, if made aware of them, would frown on as kinky or bizarre. No matter how far the two of you are apt to explore 'less-traveled roads', however, you will rarely cause any serious harm, either to yourselves or to others. Your pursuits would not be restricted to the physical plane by any means but may well emerge in intellectual or even spiritual practices. Marriage can be based squarely on one such field of practice, which may involve an ideology or a social or political group to which this relationship devotes its energies.

    Unless your love interest can work through his problems of low self-esteem and self-worth, he will not return to you.



  • your relation is good but need to work together on it



  • @TheCaptain said in Requesting help (Dear Captain please reply if u see this):

    @Mimi970453 this relationship can work out for marriage but both partners have to be prepared to work at it. And it seems for the moment your love interest is too scared of the intensity generated here. He also values his independence very much and tends to be overly self-critical and to under-value himself and his ability to maintain a relationship. He can be very inconsistent. He measures himself by an impossibly high ideal, perhaps comparing himself or the relationship to other people's. So if he feels headed towards failure, he will pull out of a relationship early without trying to make it better. This relationship contains a wellspring of energy that can be either used constructively or simply left to flood out of control. Thus this matchup may be characterized as a continual struggle on your part to harness your love interest's irrepressible energies. If you are to be successful, you must impose the necessary discipline - but the two of you can be highly effective in bringing this man's energy under control; in the best-case scenario, the result will be a merger of your know-how and his creativity. If you are unsuccessful, battles between you will rage, with neither side prepared to compromise.

    In your love affair, there will be a hint of the kind of idiosyncrasy of which the two of you are capable. Unusual, even peculiar practices may well emerge here, which you two are likely to accept as normal but which society, if made aware of them, would frown on as kinky or bizarre. No matter how far the two of you are apt to explore 'less-traveled roads', however, you will rarely cause any serious harm, either to yourselves or to others. Your pursuits would not be restricted to the physical plane by any means but may well emerge in intellectual or even spiritual practices. Marriage can be based squarely on one such field of practice, which may involve an ideology or a social or political group to which this relationship devotes its energies.

    Unless your love interest can work through his problems of low self-esteem and self-worth, he will not return to you.

    Dear Captain..

    Thank you very much for your reply. It goes on to affirm exactly what I have been facing and feeling about him and our situation.
    Does this seem like a twin flame relationship to you? Cause the dynamic is seeming exactly like that to me.
    I want you to know that my life has been feeling like hell over the past two months ever since he started behaving this way with me. He won't agree to meet me, see me, won't even reply to me.
    This situation is making me feel like he will not return to me ever. There are huge internal spiritual shifts that are being asked of him which he is just denying. Plus the fact that we belong to different religions could also be one of his biggest fear.

    All this chaos is causing me to lose my internal balance. I am sufferring. I am having moments where i want to give up and just the other moment i feel like i can't give up. So much push and pull is happening within myself and i don't know how to deal with this. This has started to physically manifest in my body with a lot of stress taking toll over my daily activities.

    You mentioned this could be a great connection, and i know it in my soul too. Whenever we are together we are very happy but he says that we only vibe well as friends. And that is way different from love.

    I know he's pulling rude moves on me, avoiding me..invalidating all my feelings and making me miserable because he wants me to go away. I have never faced such a situation in my life before. I don't know how to deal with this?

    Could you help me understand what can I do to make him come back? Because all my efforts..are not even going in vain..infact they are backfiring at me...cuz when i attempt to keep the connection or genuinely communicate with him... He calls me crazy obsessed.

    Please help me understand how to move ahead. I am genuinely in a lot of pain. I don't know how I'm going to make it out of this.

    Regards
    MS



  • This post is deleted!


  • There comes a time in a relationship - which I feel you have reached now - when you have to think about your own health and happiness and decide whether the relationship as it is (not some future possibility or hope) is helping or harming you. This guy is all over the place right now. Are you going to waste any more time being pushed around by him? This is NOT a twin flame relationship as there is no equality or sharing here.



  • @TheCaptain I understand what you are saying and agree to it as well. But there are feelings of guilt, remorse, and having messed up something really good at my end.
    No matter how much I want to get angry at him for doing what he has done, i can't help but also understand and see things from his point of view.
    He is somebody who has a very busy life, is the sole earner of his family, and also, his family is very conservative. We both are from India, and he comes from a Muslim family while i am a Hindu. Which is probably one of the major fears and blocks in his head.
    (Which also shouldnt be that big of a deal as I am willing to convert to his religion, and i know in my heart my family would agree to whatever it is in which my true happiness lies. They are not that conservative)
    I understand what could have caused his fears as his last relationship, did not work out due to religion differences (his ex was a christian)
    He might be afraid of things not working out, which u rightly explained, he pulled out too fast. From day one i was the one convincing him how this could work and he was the one denying it at all costs.
    I'd say he has no balls to fight for us, but he said he has no will... So i guess i have to live with that.
    I cannot explain how heartbreakingly painful and emotionally tumultuous this is for me.
    The reason i mentioned this to be a twin flame relationship was because of all these things that have been happening. My emotions are out of my control. I try to convince myself that I will be okay without him, but something within keeps reminding me that this might be the loss of a lifetime. When i think to the moment where I'm on my deathbed and the entire life (apparently) flashes like a movie in the head, the fact that he would be one of those memories, and probably that would be the only next time I'd ever experience/relive his love is heartbreaking to me. Idk if i have worded this feeling appropriately or not but it just hurts a lot.

    I have never been abandoned like this before. I never thought something like this could ever happen. While my emotional side is so overwhelmed...there is a part of my logic which keeps telling me i am taking this too seriously by letting it affect me this much. But the truth is the intensity i felt with him defied all logic that might exist.

    This period of no contact that he has forced upon me keeps giving me anxiety. I have tried reaching out to him but i get no response. Even when i stopped trying to reach out, it didn't affect him. It's like he created this distance to move on from me. And that's what scares me that the distance wil actually make him and me both forget what we had.
    He won't ever give us a chance to restart. He won't ever find that courage in him.
    So what am I supposed to do. How am I supposed to live with this void.
    Why was i given empty promises of marriage.
    Why doesn't no relation of mine stick.

    I am absolutely lost and questioning my existence.
    I don't even know if i am making any sense



  • @Mimi970453 you are giving too much of yourself away to someone who is crushing your spirit. What will be the point if you lose yourself over a relationship that is not whole-hearted on both sides? You are pining for something that was not real. It was better in your mind and hopes than reality. This man is weak and not the hero of your dreams. Why waste your time when a real lover may be invisible to you because you are so preoccupied with this non-relationship? Real solid relationships work both ways. This is a one-way street.


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