I really need a reading regarding my fiance wanting to relocate for new job

  • @thecaptain Thank you for that in depth evaluation, Im confused however on some of the points, you mentioned marriage, do you see us finally getting married? We have been together for 8yrs and enganged for the past four years he is always willing to go to courthouse,but im the one who wants to refrain from that, cause i would like at least a wedding, doesnt have2 be too elaborate or fancy. My fiance is a truck driver currently and so far he enjoys his profession. The only thing that didnt make sense to me where the examples of possible professions you listed for him, cause those are jobs that he would hate doing. He never wants to work inside office or anything relating to business, actually we have that very much in common. We love manual labor, especially outdoory type of jobs. He is country boy "redneck" whose dream job would be getting paid to hunt lol or be nascar driver lol. Iv decided to try this move out with him, i dont want to move 2hrs away, and we have almost broken up over this at least 10 times in last 4 weeks. But we are in fiancially difficult position right now because he currently the only one bringing in money, and now we have temporary custody of his 8yr boy, who desperately needs counseling and possibilty medication, for ADD and severe behavior and obedience issues. Hence why he is so motivated to take this particular job, great money and health coverage. Do you see this job lasting? Will we live the 2hr drive away from our cleveland area for any length of time? Im praying he would get job just as good around here. Im willing to try this move out because I dont want to lose him and everything we worked so hard for. Because he is going thru with this move whether I come or not.

  • @vettech78 when someone says they are focusing more on the wedding than being married, I know they are as yet not ready to take that big step.
    Your fiance may be the "not wanting to be tied to a boring job" type at the moment, but he will change as he (and you) matures/accepts more responsibility and realizes that he is limiting his options, not having freedom. Any job can have a worker's own stamp or personality put into it to make it interesting.

    You will have to either accept that your fiance is (for a while longer) full of wanderlust and needs to move around to new places and situations - or end it with him.

  • @thecaptain Hello Im still confused on the reading. I couldnt understand what you were trying to say regarding/wedding and the marriage. My fiance and I are very much ready to married, we were just discussing some of the details the other day, we have the d.j and photographer lined up. As for his job, he enjoys what he does, but alot of the trucking companies near cleveland just werent paying the bills, we were constantly struggling to make ends meet. His uncle who lives 2hrs south of cleveland works for fracking industry driving water truck and he is bringing home $1600.00 a week! Plus wonderful health coverage for him, his son and myself. He does not want to keep going from one company to another because they either dont pay well, or they expect their drivers to break laws, like driving too long without a break. And having no decent benefits and retirement plan. At age 40 he is sick and tired of having to keep going from company to company,and moving around. He says he ready to get married, move into our forever home and to finally work at the job he can retire from. He does not want to live in the city of cleveland, he is country boy, raised in the country. We found places that are "country-like" settings that are within 45-60 min of cleveland, which was one of my requirements, however we were dissapointed when the houses in these places are beyond our budget especially if job isnt paying well. This last company he was working for, he had worked there for about 8 years but lossed it thru no fault of his own. Now that he has his son he wants to make sure he has nice place to live, where its more rural,less crime, bigger yards, and able to enjoy his hobby such as hunting. He is hoping that where we move to is gonna be forever, and hoping this will be his last job. Now the issue comes in where i didnt want to be 2hours away from my hometown, and he said he consider moving one hour closer north, so i would only have 1hour to drive every week to see my friends,family,etc.. then he would have to drive an hour to work everyday however. He had this job offer in the past before we had his son in our life, but i put my foot down and said i refused to move that far. So he never took the job because he didnt want to lose me. So we have spent the last 5years here in a small apartment unit of a house with no yard for our dog, around all the factories, and high crime neighborhood less then 5miles away. He did all this for me, my mom lives 3miles from here. But with a child who needs good schools, emotional and behavior issues that need treatment, he had decided that he needed to take this job his uncle been trying to talk him into for awhile. Iv decided to give this move a try because i dont want to lose him and i surely cant blame him for wanting stability for his son. I wanted to know if this job is gonna last awhile? Will this move be good for us, will this put us in better position or will it cause new slate of problems?

  • @vettech78 well, does a fancy wedding mean more to you than being married to this guy? If you really wanted to be his wife, you would have a cheap quiet registry office service and just be happy to be united. Weddings are all frills and drama. It would be both considerate and practical to marry as economically as possible, given your state of finances at the moment. Maybe your fiance is afraid of wedding bills on top of everything else he has to worry about? It would be a loving gesture on your part to remove that worry from his shoulders and put the money towards getting your own home together. What are your priorities?

  • @thecaptain And no, I don't see this job lasting but the change will be good for you in that you need to shake yourself up from the comfortable, inflexible 'no-change' state of mind you have.

  • @thecaptain one of the reasons we were holding off the wedding part was cause my mom said it was important to her to be part of the wedding. And right my fiance and my family are not on good terms. And i feel very strongly about the ceremony being performed by my pastor and not justice of the peace. My pastor needs to travel to perform it. And my mom and i had already spent lots of money on wedding supplies and decor cause we were doing a DIY wedding. As for this job, i said i was willing to make the sacrifice for this job cause it supposedly gonna be better then any job he had here. I told him awhile ago if this job dont work out im going home. Because for me this move means i have to spend alot of money on gas and long drive every week, that i dont do well driving in bad weather. I did extensive research on the area, and called potential companies in my field. There are over 150 companies up here towards cleveland and a total of 5 companies within one hour drive down there. The nearest store down there is at least 35miles away and i have no transportation. Its no mans land, nothing for miles! And i just found out the only 2days off he will have will be the only day i could travel home to visit my family and friends and my doctors. He says he is ready to move this weekend. If i go with him now i wont be able to host my moms birthday gathering like her and planned for months, i will miss my birthday party that my mom is gonna throw me to. He wants his vechicle for his days off so hd can get around take his son places etc.. We have been lacking private time together and trying to help repair and strenghthen this r.ship but this move will basically have us as roommates 2 ships passing in the night. The companies down there told me what the pay starts off for me and its significant less then up here. Cause its so rural down there business not very in demand when theres no people around ! Anything i like to do and my hobbies is all at least 35miles away. And 2 vechicles are crucial because whenever we get into a fight he likes to pull that "you aint taking my car" routine. As a woman its important to me for my family and friends to be able to visit me, see my home, etc.. but will never happen. None of them have time or money to drive that far coupled with the fact that wouldnt anyway if my fiance is home cause they dont like him. There are just too many issues with this move iv been praying asking god for signs and everything in universe is trying to tell me not to go. But he needs to figure this out on his own cause me trying to reason with him have unsuccessful. But if this job isnt going to last then do i pack everything and drag it all down there? Or find a way to wait?

  • @vettech78, you support your fiance and move without complaining or resenting him if it doesn't last because that is what a partner is supposed to do in love. If you stay, you will both end up hating each other.

  • @thecaptain Yes i understand this. But that applies to normal relationships, with ours its not. He is the reason why my friends and family wont visit. Thats responsibility he needs to make. This could have been prevented if he hadnt been verbally abusive to my family and I. When it comes to this move he has treated very poorly and cruel things i didnt deserve. Like the car issue, i told him i didnt feel comfortable moving that far with his car being the only car between us. Cause he has sat there and told me i couldnt use his car. I just lost my job over this cause i had to call off my shift at last minute cause he decided to be vindictive and say i couldnt use his car. We both are aware of this issue. He is aware of this issue as well and has admitted that he treats me poorly. He has agreed to do couples counseling. He had very bad childhood, i understand, i had rough one too and i dont treat anyone like that. It doesnt give someone get out jail free card however. I am willing to forgive him and give this a chance, but if this move proves to be unhealthy for me, or makes my life, finances, health worse then i will have no choice to come back. Now this move has chance to be more successful depending on his future behavior. And this is a chance im willing to take, cause we do deeply love one another and try to be forgiving christian, knowing with Gods help anything is possible and no one is a hopeless case. So only time will tell. I want a healthy balanced relationship/marriage, and with a child involved its crucial that he grows up witnessing what a healthy marriage looks like or he will be destined for unhealthy relationships himself. Children learn what they live. Many aspects of our r.ship are suffering now, such as intimacy, quality couple time, etc.. so if this highly demanding job, puts more strain on the issues we are in the middle of fixing, it will put the nails in the coffin so to speak. This move is really bad timing, but we cant help that, so we need to try real hard and make best of it and time will tell, how this will pan out. I found out that i will be getting a car, surprisingly social security is telling my little sis they owe $12,000!! They deposited into my mom and sisters account. She already went out and bought new car paid in full! So they letting me have her old jeep. So this will help me to give this move a chance, so If it doesnt work out I free to come home. He has pleaded with me that if i move with him he will treat like a queen lol. So we will see.

  • @vettech78 Do you know anyone on here who does tarot readings? I think there are different types, pychic/medium, tarot, astrology etc... I have tarot cards, been doing them for about 12 years, but i try to avoid doing readings on myself, cause i want accurate/unbias answers. I have some specific questions i need answered but not sure what types of readings are best for that. Again, iv done girlfriends readings and such for them, they say i hit it spot on, and the predictions come true much of the time,but thats me doing readings for others.

  • @vettech78, are you sure this man is the right partner for you? He seems to make promises he doesn't fulfill. Is your love for him based on fact (what he is) or fantasy (what you hope he will become)?

  • I don’t do tarot readings, but some practical suggestions- if you are in a bind where you lose access to a vehicle for work again, you could call an Uber? Or lyft? That way you aren’t completely stranded. While youre at it, you might want to make a spare key and keep it to yourself until he proves he won’t take the car away. That way you can take it anyway. I dunno tho...if my fiancé took away the car when I needed to be at my job, he’d wonder what kind of hell he got himself into. Also past behavior is a good indication of future behavior, might as well assume your fiancé is going to keep acting the way he always has been and make your decisions based on that

  • @thecaptain yes im sure he is the right one, otherwise i wouldnt still be with him. No one is perfect, and neither one of us are innocent

  • @vettech78 it is certainly not by his words, behaviour or actions that you can be sure he is the right one. Try to be objective - if a friend told you about your fiance's behaviour as if he were her partner, would you advise her to throw her old life over to stick with him or stay where she is?

  • @thecaptain Hi captain. I have now moved into the new house with my fiance. I was wondering if future prospects have changed or not. Looking into the next few months. Today is my 40th birthday

  • @blmoon Hello blmoon, I was wondering if you could do a birthday reading for me? Today is 40th, my fiance and i just moved into the new house in southern ohio.

  • @vettech78, things will thankfully calm down for you next year, after this year’s chaotic ups and downs. 2019 for you is all about evaluating the relationships in your life, starting with your relationship with yourself where you may have to let go of old tired attitudes, regrets or fears that aren't serving you. 2019 will be a year where you’ll be required to heighten your sense of responsibility to your home and family environment. Don’t be surprised if you need to take on some added weight with home and domestic or family matters. Embrace it instead of resenting it. There’ll be added tension around how you relate with your close relationships, however. You are likely to find your relationship with those near and dear to you growing ever closer and stronger in 2019, while any relationship that is no longer of mutual benefit will come under the microscope and may actually end (if it didn’t already end in 2018). It can be a great year for marriage if you have met ‘the one’. It will also be time to investigate if you feel empowered or disempowered in your home and domestic life. Your energy levels will run high this year, but you should watch for hasty or impetuous behaviour. Remember that haste makes waste. As long as you direct your excess energy constructively, instead of wasting your time in conflict, you can accomplish much. It will be a time when you may be concerned with taking care of your home, perhaps decorating, buying furniture, or even finding a new home (though you already have). It will also be worthwhile to consider taking courses that focus on your well-being and balance. If you have ever wanted to paint, sing, act, or play a musical instrument for pleasure, this is also favoured in 2019. 2019 will centre around and be all about looking after others - friends and family, and your home.

    For you, 2019 will be associated with wholeness and, during the year, you may be aware of some aspect of your life that needs attending to so that you can feel complete. For example, you may have unresolved issues with a family member, and by speaking with them, it may help you to release a great deal. During 2019, it will be advisable to be aware of which emotional attachments need healing too, so that you can bring all your energy back into the present. For example, you may not even realise you are still attached to an idyllic, romantic summer holiday you spent with a lover, or time spent with your family, and part of you may really wish you were still there. You may find that you are particularly sentimental this year, which can prevent you from letting go of old nostalgia, love-letters, photographs and memorabilia. This process may mean revisiting painful emotions, but by facing them and realising they’re from the past, you can gently allow them to dissolve. In 2019, you may find that you get very deeply involved in a relationship, a work project or with family affairs. You may go over and over situations until you get them right or until they are perfect, and you will not let issues drop. You may open up your heart so deeply that it shifts your perspective on life for the better, so you become more loving towards others. Indeed, this is a great time to reach out to support and nourish those within your community, and to learn to love and nurture yourself too. You may be made very aware of your choices during the year, and you will need to choose between helping yourself and serving the greater good. Other people may reassure you that you are making the right decisions, but your conscience will tell you the truth. The year’s energy will focus attention on relationships, on the element of friendship, and on children and family within this framework. There may be issues with commitments or collective responsibilities, which you should try to work through. These issues can be made easier if you keep your vision focused firmly on the bigger picture, and by remembering to put yourself into that picture as you may neglect your own needs too. There can be challenges to deal with if you just judge situations by their appearances which, as you know, aren’t always what they seem. You may find 2019 a fertile time for your creativity, and search for as many ways as possible to express it. Like buying a new cookery book that changes your relationship with food, making simple changes on how you approach your life can make an enormous impact. Overall, this can be a very productive and happy time if you devote your time to duty, responsibility, love, home and family, justice and peace, and emotional influences.

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  • I got a great job offer, but I doubt it because of the relocation.

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