BLMOON



  • @blmoon
    HAHAH! Just realized I said moon instead of MOOD! Freudian slip?



  • @blmoon
    It is the same building, the second picture is a detail of one of the side doors.
    Thank you for reminding me of the vibe thing... I am definitely going to sage as soon as my son is out for a few hours, and chimes, yes! and music! I keep forgetting to play music as I used to when I had my record player... I haven't got one now, no room for it. Still, I can play music from my mobile, but I never thin of it, I am not the mobile generation! Ha, ha, ha. I had never thought about the vibes from the old people... I had one old lady in the apartment right below mine - she is the one I liked, I think she had good vibes though - one right next to me, who died on Friday, one right above me who is still there and I wish her all the best. The other two who died were one not so directly close to me, and there is an old man two floors below , and there another woman somewhere, I see he occasionally. All those people lived or live alone, which I suppose doesn't help the vibes. A small home with gardens is my dream, but there really are a lot of obstacles to that, the first one being financial. It might be possible somewhere but it would be very far away from the city and therefore, from my son. I would be living alone, which would not bother me, but I would need a very high wall around it, lol, there is a great security concern. In the past few years there has been a real invasion of illegal immigrants from Africa and the Middle East and crime rates are rocket high. Isolated elderly people are favourite targets. It is possible to have a place like that in the outskirts of the city, but the prices are nothing I could possibly dream of. Maybe that is the bouquet you saw my son giving me...? Ha, ha, ha ! Well, I know he would if he could, but it may take a few years for him to reach that level... and then he will be thinking of getting a home for himself... I have to take one day at a time. That's exactly what I need "a nice little home with gardens and ample peaceful space between you and other's energy" thank you! Thank you for your prayers and your wonderfully positive thoughts, I need that.

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  • @Blmoon
    Dear Blmoon, I hope you had a wonderful Christmas. I have my sister here and I am going out of my mind! Yes. I know, it was a dumb thing to do, but she invited herself and I really did not know how to get out of it. I have been handling it relatively well, all considered, you would be proud of me. The first few days were oretty bad, then I was doing much better and thinking that well, after all, it was not so bad when bang! it hit me full blast. We have to share a room you know, and just when I was reading a bit to prepare my mind to go to sleep - after taking all the usual tablets and more - she decided to get into one of those impossible conversations where I explain the same thing to her a thousand times and it keeps going round in circles with no hope of an outcome. Another sleepless night for me, but guess what, she went to sleep without the slightest diffuculty! I'll tell you more about it later, she is in a difficult situation - all her own doing - but I feel bad for her and... you know me! She is leaving on Wednesday evening, she thinks it is too short but for me, it cannot come soon enough, believe me. Ten incledibly long days! How are you my friend? I have not heard from you for a while. I hope you are well and enjoying some quiet times.
    Hugs



  • @radiantsun
    Happy New Year Blmoon !
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  • @Blmoon
    How are you dear friend? I hope the year started well for you. My suster keft on the 2nd and instead of being relieved, I got a terrible migraine I can't shake off. I do worry about my sister, dhe sokd her house without having another and she is now practically homeless. She is staying in a small hotel and has all her things in two different places and now wants to move them all together to another friend's place and leave them there while she goes to Canada for a while. She used to live there and trusts the doctors. What worries me most is that she doesn't remember from one minute to the next what I explained to her. I think much is that she doesn't listen and also she lives too much in her own head, but I am concerned. On the other hand, she remembers all the gossip she hears... I tell her that she needs to be more selective in her thoughts and not to waste energy on negative things which don't concern her. She agrees but doesn't do it. She is in a terrible situation and I wish I could hrlp her, but I can't afford to go there and live in a hotel while I help her sort her things out because I still have to continue paying my rent here... When you have the energy, would you try to give me some insight on this? I would very much appreciate it. I a. Wortied about her health.
    Hope you are well and that you had a good Epiphany day.
    Hugs
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  • @Blmoon
    Sorry about all the typos. I wrote this late at night on my stupid iPad.



  • @Blmoon
    Tomorrow is the day Blmoon. Mucha Day! I'll tell you all a about it.
    Hungs



  • @radiantsun
    I have been thinking of you! And here you are. HUGS!



  • @blmoon
    The exhabition was great but too crowded...pity we left it so late...and it is over this weekend. After that we had lunch at an Art Nouveau restaurant near the museum and on the way back had a look at my favourate Art Nouveau hotel near me and we bought a yummy hot chocolate at my favourite chocate shop. It was bitterly cold. I am posting some pictures. It was hard to take them at the museum with all those people... More later.
    The Scorpio called me a few days ago after all this time... he looked well and in good spirits. He said he is in a relationship with a Ukranian woman about ten years younger than himself... she enjoys culture and is a good cook... no question of hos getting a divorce, his children would not hear of it... she accepts the situation and he admitted it is a good excuse for him... His wife seems to have accepted the situation, he has lunch with her once a month... he still manages her business for her... You know what I thought, don't you? THIS is what he was offering me! To be the other woman in the dark,.. go on trips with him...no rent... he would take care of all household expenses... he would make the choices... and on top off all that, I would have to accept to live where his family lives... close to his children, far away from my son... etc. etc. !!! Even if I had been in love with him, which of course I was not, I would never have wanted such a deal! Wish him joy!
    Hugs.

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  • @Blmoon
    PS. The last pictures is the hotel I was telling you about. The restaurant pictures did not upload. Maybe next time. 🙂



  • @Blmoon
    Exhibition I meant.😊
    How do you like the Moon Girl? It is the first time I see her, I did not expect that from Mucha.



  • @radiantsun
    I was going to say something about that moon girl!!! In fact I just posted the full blood wolf moon pics I took then posted on facebook and I did one as a selfie with the moon over my head! A similar affect! Thank you....I so love your Paris pictures. I think I told you years ago that when I had that past life progression done and it covered 5 lifetimes that related most to my current life. Four were not so happy but then I was taken to my happiest life and it was in Paris. What an experience and so explained my great affection for all things Paris and my love of the Impressionist Art. I was actually a male artist during tat time period. I wrote that experience down some where in a journal. I remember parts of it. I had meant to research the details. Interesting the scorpio calling you. Why? I don't think he is ever a true open book but your thoughts about his intentions make sense. Perhaps he still can't believe you took a pass?☺ I think despite his usual MO his relationship with you was truly an opportunity to change and find fulfillment in a way he will never find as is. I think at the time his dissatisfaction with his life was real and he could have made a change. You were at the time making very big scary changes and you were an honest supporting friend. You were escaping on many levels and he had his toe dipped into the same water but no he did not make it. And calling you I think is just his old habit of pretending he is happy. His happiness is very superficial and as he ages he will be more stuck with himself. Being busy will not be an option at some point. And he knows the women he buys are no prize.. I think his call is timely for your new year. To again enjoy your accomplishment. How far you have come. This year can be very profitable for you so don't think any dreams are too silly. You will always have a realistic head leading but it is ok to balance that with dreams and being open to magic! You are loved! BLESSINGS!



  • @blmoon
    PS..past life REGRESSION! Or maybe progression has it's own meaning!



  • @blmoon
    I remember you telling me about your past life in Paris as male artist. For some reason I imagine you living in this area, some did...the wealthier ones that is. Widh you would come in your present life... I would love to show all those wonderful places.
    Funny enough, I got a message from the Scorpio yersterday, asking if we could continue our chat today lunchtime. I was busy and suggested Monday lunchtime and he said that would be great. We had to cut it short last time because he had a very bad connection. Not much left to say, I expect. I suppose he is happy enough, he always said he didn't needto be happy all the time.
    I am very tired at the moment, my sister's have been pumping much of my energy. She wanted me to come and help her and very generously offered to pay for half of my trip!!! I went to bed fairly early, fell askeep but woke up again a few minutes later and found you post.😄
    Hugs 🤗



  • @Blmoon
    Oh dear Blmoon, what a horrible dream! I had broken my glasses and I needed new ones. In the meantime I needed to get my spares but I was away from home. In all that, I found myself in my former house where my ex was living with his woman, but she was not there. The house was still the same, only the furniture was different, lots of red velvet, the bed was covered with it.. He was being as vicious as he ever was, saying and doing things he knew would hurt me. I don't know why I was there, but I seemed tonhave no choice, but I was leaving. I woke up in the middle of all that, feeling really bad with a terrible headache. It was like living the whole thing all over again, I stood up to him, I was strong, but it was awful. I had not had these dreams for quite some time, I thought it was over.. I hope this does not mean they are back, I had forgotten those horrible dreams I had almost every night for so long... I want to be rid of him. How did he get back into my head? I feel exhausted, as if I had not slept, but I feel better after telling you about it. The sun is shining, for the first time in a while, it is cold out but warm inside, I am listening to Mozart, lit a candle to Saint Michael, and I tell myself it was only a bad dream.... that in reality I am rid of him. But am I? I so miss that house...that has always been the most important thing for me since I lost my childhood home, to have a house of my own. But it was not to be. I had put so much love into that house... every stick of furniture, every detail so carefully chosen...it was all made for me...even the nightingale singing outside my window every night seemed to be there for me... Another deep wound.
    Hope you are well.
    Hugs



  • @radiantsun
    I feel for you!!! I get those occasional "in the past" dreams! They bring up the reality of just how traumatizing it was. I think you are being reminded because it has been a struggle to make the kind of progress you long for. Be kinder and more patient as the trauma was very real! You can be stoic yet it is ok to take the time to heal. The trauma of enduring the intense red hot emotions of that scary ride he took you on lasted a long time. Also, the logical view is to not let the loss taint your future. That home you loved he trampled into JUST A HOUSE. I am certain you will have a home. And it will be yours and you will not have to struggle to keep it a home. I didn't respond to your recent dealings with your sister but felt it always effects you in a negative way. I think you struggle with being a civilized kind sister to her but really somewhere deep her childish inability to be grateful or happy does poke at you. Specially with all her house problems which are her own fault! I think you should allow yourself more space from her dramas and allow yourself to feel resentment. You have suffered deeply losing your home even though it was attached to too high an emotional price. Trauma does leave us exhausted at times. It comes and goes and if we do not allow ourselves to just "BE" life will knock us on our butts in ways we don't want. I get that at times. I had horrible dreams about three nights ago so it must be cosmic. Took me awhile to shake off those past emotions. You have come a long way! Hang on to that. BLESSINGS!



  • @blmoon
    You might be right about my sister's negative influence. We have been looking forward a to quiet joyful Christmas my son and I and then, she decided to come! She literally took all our time with one thing or another... the only positive thing she had to say in the end was that she had never seen Paris this way, she had never thought it was so beautiful, after we had taken her on a ride through all the sights with the Christmas lights at night to end up with a night visit of my neighbourhood basilica I sent you pictures of a while ago. That ride was truly magical. I worry about her because I explain things to her again and again and she doesn't remember the next moment. I sometimes thinks she just doesn't listen...because she will tell me every bit of gossip someone told her in great detail. She always assumes the worst in everyone and seldom has anything positive to say about anyone. I am not interested in gossip, it bores me, and listening to her drains me. On Christmas Eve friends had given us tickets for a Christmas concert at the most beautiful chapel in the world, the Sainte Chapelle, when she said she was coming, I tried to get a ticket for her but it was impossible, I told her over the phone and she was very upset that we were going to leave her alone and bla bla. My son said he would let her have his ticked and I refused. This was from 6 pm to 7 pm and we had to be there by 5:30 because of security check. It is not far, so two hours all in all. Not exactly as if we were leaving her alone all Christmas Eve. I had left dinner more or less ready, we came back from the concert, we had a great dinner and then we took her to Midnight Mass at Notre Dame Cathedral which was pure magic and when we came back we had a glass of champagne and a second dessert.
    I did not give in on the concert, but it did upset me, like so many other things... So yes, you are right. And her visit was not good for my son either. He had just got into really good dynamics with work, sports, and other activities, and that was totally disrupted and he hasn't managed to get back into it. Can't go to sleep, gets up too late, gets behind with his work, misses sports...today he actually told me he is depressed and is trying to get out of it. And I feel the same way! I had been doing so much better with anxiety and now I have to take pills again. I worry about my son and that he may not have made the right choice... I made sacrifices to give him the opportunity to graduate from the best schools and I had been looking forward to him having a good job and taking some of the pressure off, and with the choice he made, there is no telling how long it will take before he has a reasonable income...
    Your answer helped a lot, you made it make sens. You see the situation with my sister clearly, even though you don't know her, or a portion of what she gets up to.:)
    hoping to sleep better tonight and wish you only beautiful magical dreams.
    Hugs
    *PS. The picture is where the Christmas concert took place, with chairs instead of the people wondering around :).0_1548891161092_Sainte_Chapelle_-_Upper_level_1.jpg



  • @radiantsun
    What a Majestic picture! I would have savored every moment of your holiday agenda!!! Yes, totally wasted on your sister and believe me I have met her kind! (a lot like my own sister) And it is sneaky just how those draining un-joyful types can be. I'm glad you did not give in on the concert. She would not have appreciated it and it serves her better to validate her constant sense of being neglected and slighted. Most good hearted folks try not to be a bother but some folks love making nice folks feel bad. The thing to never forget is they ARE draining. They tend to be depressed and they suck up other's energy. Some depressed people keep to themselves but the dangerous ones latch on and feed off others to fill their forever empty place. AND you are so right, she isn't listening!.......it is that detachment from the moment that does have them in their own small world. Small minded people talk about others. Intelligent people talk IDEAS. We all enjoy a little what's up with others but I avoid people who only enjoy gossip. You can trust they will talk about you, which makes it impossible to really have a friendship. Don't worry about your son. Remember that winding path of his is his way. Also, all hard driven ambitious ventures are challenged by keeping a balance, staying energized and knowing how to pace. Keeping a steady momentum without crashing is normal. Down time...or the lull is hard! You are like that too! He gets that all or nothing thinking going but the wheel turns and he will be back on top. BLESSINGS!