Thought I had met 'the one'

  • after finally deciding my destructive marriage to a drinker is over, i had no intention of looking for some one new, and then fate drops this lovely man into my lap! had 6 weeks of fab connections and coldn't beleive my luck, but sometimes he became distant.Had my cards read with the wish card appearing and a major love affair, so felt ok, then he announces he doesn't want a relationship, just company, casual with no strings attatched! i am totally gutted! he still wants to be friends, and as we live in the same house, will be hard.Part of me says to cut him off totally, and the other half says to swallow my pride and keep going, hoping he will change his mind! just do not know what to do! he is aquarius and i am libra

  • I guess he's benefiting by staying, I mean, less financial worries. But, I don't know his financial situation. He's the one that did the 360 on you. It's up to you. To be honest, this guy is not for you. I would hate to think that this is fate. I think it probably should be a learning adventure. I'm Aquarius too (female). To be honest, I don't click w/members of my own sign. I seem to always attract Virgo and Capricorn. Not in love relationships only. Friends too. Usually if someone tells you that they don't want to continue the relationship status quo, then that is exactly their intentions and the best you can do is pick-up and walk away. Best wishes.

  • Hello Puds,

    Dalia makes a great point. What this person is really telling you is " He doesn't want a relationship with you." I think the best thing you can do is walk away and find someone who's "into you" and deserves to be around the magnifcant individual you are. I've recently been told the same thing but mine was"Don't fall in love with me" which means he's capable but just not with me. So, I know it hurts and I'm hurting as well but at least I know what he really meant by it. Guys just can't come out and tell you, they'd rather get hit by a bus.

    Best of Luck

  • You can't convince someone into to having a real relationship. You'll come off as being needy and desperate. I can empathize with how hurt you feel. Living in the same house will keep that wound from healing.

    If I were you, I'd ask him to move or you could move. You need distance from him. What if he starts dating someone seriously, how would you feel about yourself then? I know Libra's don't like to rock the boat, but don't lose your self-respect. Cut him out of your life. You left one destructive relationship and now you're in another. Get out and save yourself.

  • Dear Puds,

    I can totally understand where your at, my daughter at that time 20, was involved with her room mate, which end up the same way. I'm sorry to hear that. Though I moved her home with me it was still very upsetting. As I was married to a Libra, my advice would be to TOTALLY ignore him, act as if your doing just fine, get on the phone when he's around, and have others call you at those times and laugh like there's no tommorow, ask him politely when he's leaving, as you have a potential room mate moving in. You can put a ad on Craig List or look at that for a room mate or a place to live. You being a Libra you put your heart and soul into a realationship where as he doe not appear to care at all. God says to love your self 1st, take back your heart, and move on, there more out there, and you certainly deserve it! Take care, I will say a prayer for you!

  • hey puds

    im (sagittarius) having love troubles of my own...i fell in love with a guy (cancer), he is two years older than me and he is my brothers friend. I think he likes me, because we kissed a couple of times, but the other day he sent me an email saying I should like someone else, then the next day he kissed me again. I dont know, but i think he might be confussed. I dont want to lose him, because i really love him.

    Maybe this guy that you are having trouble with, is just confussed about what he wants. You should just take it slow with him.

    Best Of luck

  • What I have learned and had to learn the hard way......when a man tell you he's not ready for a relationship.....LISTEN and dont try to convince him other wise. It only make you look needy and desperate in his eyes. there are billions of people on the planet and if you can love your self enough to walk away from someone thats not willing to committ and love the way you do. The right one will eventually show up. SECONDLY i'm not sure if he moved in with you in this short period of you knowing him or if you moved in with him, but I can tell you this is also a common game that men are playing on womens emotions. They will show interest in you and move very fast and some how move in with you and when they seee you are very much in to them they say they are not ready for a relationship. By this time you are emotionally connected to them, and usally will put up with a lot from them at the expense financially as well.By the end you will be emotionally, spiritually, and maybe even finacially bankrupt. My dear your story sound all to familiar. Love your self enough to not subject your self to this kind of needless torture that you will continue to endure week after week especially if the two of you remain in the same household.

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