Why do I feel paranoid
Hello , I have been in a bad relationship for over 20 years, I am not married to this man but I have two kids to him. I could go on and on talking about how controlling he is but I wanna keep this short. Right now he and I are not talking to each other because of an argument, anyway, I know that this man is no good, and as much as I would love to meet someone new, I always get these very paranoid feelings about being alone. I hate these feelings. I usually get them real bad at night, I feel like I need to get up and move around and talk to someone and guess who I usually end up calling..... Sometimes I think I am going out of my mind.....hmmm maybe I am....I did a terot reading but sometimes I don't understand them too much, I get the three of cups card and of course the death card a lot
Sweetie, when doing the Tarot Reading, understand the image & symbols, we assume the DEATH card is BAD LOL the opposite actually... these Cards are messages that appear to us as more of an EYE OPENER & also a sign that we need to either Rid a Neg vibration that is going on in our lives a situation that has manifested - that no longer serves as a good or postive energy......
Dear Singlelaidee, as for the Crutch, that you feel lonley,,,, it's our Sensitive loving natural nature that we are needy beings....The need to belong & feel accepted...... a knowledge so Ancient that we know not what too do..... !!!
LET GO of the NEEDY atttachment, when your heart is telling you to CALL HIM"
TURN to your Angels.... Call THEM..... they will provide you solid & clarity to what is is you trully Seek in life.... I trust in you to follow & understand... you are here NOW... and are seeking...
DON"T STOP.... until you have recieved -- when it resonates & you know it.... you have stepped higher into your learnings & lessons.......
the NEEEDY will be replaced with people of the same vibration...no longer will that lonly void be felt........
Peace love & light to you.. let me know how you feel about this message...
if it makes sense...
You have this connection with this man. Three of cups means usually friendship connection. You miss him talking with you and you have a comfort zone with him. How is he bad? What is your sign and his? After so many years sometimes it is only the comfort thing that keeps us together. Nights are always hard it is when we can open up to all sorts of feelings and emotions. If you cant be alone with yourself how can anyone be with you? You should always love yourself first. It sounds like you need maybe to be alone for alittle bit.
Here's the funny thing, you are affraid of being alone, however, you are NEVER alone because you always have yourself. All females suffer from this fear of being alone and if they tell you they never have, they are not being truthful. Here's the deal, this guy is no good, you said it yourself, so you need to buck up, let him go, and move on, I'm positive there is a new path for you just waiting to open up. You must first have your heart free from him.
The 3 of cups is for sisterly celebration and the death cards is the End of something. In this case, it would seem that your cards were telling you it is OK to end the cycle on that 'relationship' and to get more in tune with your girlfriends. Through them you will find support.
Hi there Singlelaidee
You sure sound like you're wrapped up in a tight space at the moment, but y'know I sympathise and relate to a degree. I'm just gonna send you what I get in psychic terms, if that's okay:
Firstly, your partner is not a bad man. But he's not right for you anymore, if he ever really was. Again, that doesn't make him a bad person, but makes him bad for YOU. Try to stop seeing him as being bad, as such, and value the friendship aspects the two of you have for the time being.
You need to cut the cord of this relationship as soon as you feel ready to do so. Remember, both of you deserve better here. Being able to let each other go will put a necessary distance between you, and you just might be able to continue being friends, for the sake of the children at the very least. Clinging on will only drag this out and make the end result harder to achieve and harder to cope with.
I agree with answers given above about the loneliness aspect. We all suffer from that awful fear of going it alone. But think of this: at the moment, you are already going it alone! The fears you feel are being fuelled by the neediness we all have for someone to complete us and be there for us. Yes, your Angels and Guides are always there for you; they never leave you - it's just that sometimes our negativity blocks them from being heard.
However, what you're going through now is the stage of separation which is so necessary for you to complete the cycle you're currently in. The Three of Cups is quite significant as I think it's telling you to make more of your female friendships, or at the least, nurture your feminine side a bit more. You have a warrior aspect to yourself, but are allowing it to drown beneath weakness given vent by fear of loneliness.
The Death card, on its own, rarely signifies physical death, we all know that. Here, it is saying that your romantic feelings for your partner are dead, but you are hanging on to what's left, almost by the tips of your fingers. Are you worried about how HE'LL be if you end it for good? Are you taking on responsibility for his life, rather than your own here? He'll be okay, and if anything, might just heave a sigh of relief. His controlling ways are a childhood thing (is he a Virgo by any chance??) - ending a marriage also goes against his grain. I get the feeling his own parents split up when he was young and he feels that divorce is a shameful thing, even these days. Maybe his own mother suffered badly after the separation which makes him afraid.
Tell me: does he ever tell you that no-one could love you like he does? And that he worries about you being out in that big, bad world on your own? What he's actually saying here is HE'LL suffer on his own, without actually admitting his own fears, if you know what I mean But he needs to grow himself, without you mopping up his messes, so to speak.
Make the break as soon as you can, for your sake my friend. Being in a controlling relationship is co-dependence really, and doesn't achieve lasting happiness, even after 20 or so years. As someone wisely said above, sometimes it's the comfort of the long-term familiar we cling to.
But y'know, it's the discovery and experience of the unknown which gives us the confidence and strength we need to keep on going, so please remember this.
And I'll take my own advice one day ... truly ...
Good luck; hope this helped you some! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoox