Dreaming of my name

  • Wow! Reading this gave me chills! Some of it resonates with me, but most of it seems to be related to the man that I have been seeing for nearly a year. I will go through it line by line and tell you how it relates, and perhaps we can make some sense of things.

    The only twins that I know are my boyfriend and his sister. They are 42 years old, born on June 21, 1973. I have been starting to feel like this man could be my life partner, but there are many ways that I question a future with him. He was in a car wreck a couple of years ago, but I don't know the exact date. He was driving drunk and fell asleep at the wheel and totaled the car. We were just talking about this yesterday. He did say that he was trapped, but he was able to pull himself out of it and crawl to the highway where he was nearly run over by an oncoming car. They did see him and stop and helped him. I don't know that a stop sign was near where the accident happened.

    The family gatherings could be mine or his. I have a larger family and have five aunts an uncle on my Mom's side. I have one aunt and 2 uncles on my Dad's side, but did not really spend much time with those relatives. My father was not much a part of my life growing up. In fact, when he passed, I did not know about it for 6 months. I found out the 2 days after Christmas that year after sending him a Christmas card.

    The old farm house could be a few different things, but not related to my Dad. I don't know of anyone in his family that had a farm house. My Dad died alone in his apartment. My Grandparents had a farm house on a hill. I did spend alot of time there with them and have some cherished memories. They sold it before my grandfather passed, nearly 20 years ago. I have been thinking about the old place lately and wish I had a picture of it. The house has been torn down and a newer one built in its place. Another possibility is the old homestead out at the farm where my boyfriend's father lived, He passed a year ago January 5th and the place is still in probate. He has a mobile home on the property, but there is an old house that is falling apart that I have taken some pictures of. I also have a picture of it in all its glory. His family ancestors lived in the home many years ago. Could you see a color of the home? That could help me figure out which one it was.

    My grandfather did have some farm animals for a time, till it got to be too much for him. He had cats, dogs,chickens, pigs, cattle, and horses, from what I can remember. I am not aware of any of this in my Dad's family. Boyfriends father only had some chickens and dogs that I know of.

    Red... I have always considered red a power color and used to wear it alot to feel confident with a boss that I had several years back. The only other significance that I can think of is that my boyfriend loves the song "Lady in Red" because his mother loves the song, and he has played it for me a couple of times.

    It's hard to say if the man you see is my father or my boyfriend's father. I feel his energy when I go out to the farm. I even have a picture that I took where it looks like a man standing in the doorway, when there was no one there. My BF has had a difficult time with the loss of his father, but he is now trying to move forward. He talks to him when out at the farm, and I have started doing the same. A few weeks ago, we were at the cemetery where we scattered some of his ashes near his marker. His sister was there too, and I saw him breakdown in tears talking about how much he missed him, Do you think his father could be trying to make contact with him through me?

    I am not sure who all the people could be that you are seeing. I think his father had alot of people that he would drink with at the bar. There was a cousin close to his Dad's age that passed last June, I think. Most of my extended family are still alive. So I am not sure on this. I do not know of anyone who passed in a large group.

    I appreciate your help with this. I have had so much spiritual energy around me lately, some intense dreams and just overall weird things happening to me lately. It would be great to see what the message is and if it provides the guidance that I have been looking for. Please let me know of there is any additional information I can provide.

    I was wondering if the person at the pharmacy knowing my name meant that I needed to make changes to some medications that I am on... but there may be so much more to it than I can imagine. I look forward to hearing back from you. I wish you blessings and good things in your life. I send positive energy your way, and I feel indebted to you helping me with this. You are truly blessed. Thank you!

  • MissyMill,

    Seems I'm picking-up a little on everyone. Yes, I was going to ask about the picture you had where it appeared to have a figure in it--that's the one I'm referring to as the house w/memories. Is that your BF's or your grandparents. The house I was shown was white. I can't really answer about the pharmacy person. Spirit will often use things, situations, symbols as validation. I kinda fill-in the blanks. There's a whole range of things that are involved w/channeling from sight, emotions, hearing, etc. There usually is a reason why or when something (like seeing someone's name in a dream) will come thru. In my experience, a parent will often acknowledge BD's. Also, a chair is my symbol for parent. I know this sounds strange. I've been given symbols in my life that are symbolic for me. So, when you mentioned a chair I knew this was someone's parent. I channel ones who are passed (only in physical form) so what I know or are shown is given to me thru them. I can't be specific as who exactly knows about your BF being a twin, please know they are present and know is all that matters. Spirit may be calling attention to your health w/the pharmacy person. Pay attention to your health! It felt like your dad was alone or circumstances put him alone. Did he die alone. That's how it felt when he came thru. All the people is the bar where your BF's father went. So, yes he's definitely validating. Sometimes a lot will come thru and you get a feeling that some are here and some have passed so I make reference to what I'm seeing. I saw a stop sign. Spirit has used this before to indicate just that "stop." LOL

    I seek the aid of God thru all this and don't want to leave that out, ok. When I was a child, I had extensive dreams of being in Nazi concentration camps, being liberated and transported to a different country. I think this was my first intensive reality that I can pick-up on departed souls. One such soul actually helped me thru school because I could look-back at her experiences. If there's anything else you want to know, I'll try and help. BTW I've felt the same spiritual experiences as you recently.

  • Here is the pic I was talking about. It is the doorway to the mobile home and you can see the image of a person in the glass. It almost looks like a reflection, but there was no one around when I took this. I thought it might be a reflection of me taling the picture, but the angle is not right, and I wasn't wearing glasses.

  • The mobile home at bfs farm is white, and the old family home that is falling down was also white. There are alot of pics and belongings of his family that have passed around the farm. My grandparents home was yellow, so that rules them out.

    The pharmacy thing could be related to my health. I attributed it to a medication change due to having a miscarriage in November. I sincerely want another child, and my own interpretation is to make changes to my medication and some of my not so healthy habits to prepare for another chance. Otherwise, I cannot make much sense of it all.

    Yes, as far as I know, my Father did die alone. Come to think of it... my BFs father died alone in his home as well.

    So now that we have explained most everything, what do you think the overall message is? I feel that there is a message regarding my bf that I need to consider passing on to him. Or perhaps a message to help me understand some things about the relationship.

    I can appreciate you pointing out the aid of Gd here. I am fully open to that. I can also appreciate the childhood experiences you mentioned. You say you are experiencing the same experiences, is that in general or are you feeling it as a connection between you and me?

    Love, light, and blessings!

  • MissyMill, I am going to continue on channeling an overall message for you. The middle of March bears a lot of religious significance for me (personally.) This is the spiritual experiences I mentioned. Spiritual/psychic experiences are not separate from God like some think. I think you're becoming aware of those who have passed on and wanting to make that connection. And realizing their presence around you. I am going to ask spirit the most important thing to pass on to you. Which can be anything. I don't usually go into a lot of detail but what's been shown to me is that prayer is part of the process or needed for souls that have passed. The child you miscarried actually has a soul and is present. A lot of people dismiss that. Ok, so I'll start and let you know.

  • Thank you so much Daliolite. I appreciate you giving your time to this. I agree in the connection between prayer and spiritual-Psychic experiences. I frequently pray for Spirit to help me see what I need to see, hear what I need to hear, and say what I need to say. I use this mostly in my work as a social worker, but I also have been trying to bring this energy into understanding my relationship with my bf. Perhaps that is why I have been experiencing so many things. I have always been aware of spirits around me, but have yet to find a way to communicate with them. I speak directly to them, but am not always able to hear and understand an answer. I also believe my unborn child is with me. I continue to speak to him and ask him to stay near me, and to come back to me one day.

    I look forward to learning more. Thank you again for all your dedication to this. Blessed be!

  • MissyMill, Did you lose this child around the Christmas season.

  • It was in November, just before Thanksgiving.

  • MissyMill,

    There was some question regarding the meds w/the pregnancy. Wish you would explain this. I'm picking-up this child--boy. Seems there was a deformity w/the head. The head appears large. I'm seeing something that looks like a cleft-palate. I saw another image where he's with the grandparents--which was an OMG moment for me today. As I was sitting in a restaurant today there was a reflection in the window. He had his left arm around a grandfathers neck, he was in the middle and a grandmother was on the right side. He's ok, he's in their company and physical appearance is ok. That's the message here. I did pick-up on other things when I first channeled for you but this is what spirit wants you to know. I don't know how you felt around Christmas but this is the first image I saw w/him. I really feel as though there were a couple abnormalities w/him. It is really a great answer for you! Also, I feel like there's some book, it may be a Bible that is being shown. Perhaps reading this book or collecting memories is helpful.

  • Thank you so much! Can't articulate how good it feels to know this. I was on 4 different medications for mental health and GI purposes. After the experience with the pharmacy tech seeing my name, I went off of all but one. I have an upcoming appointment with my psych and will work on going off the last one and finding a safe alternative for pregnancy. I am hoping that I will be given another chance and my little one will come back to me. I do believe the child is a boy, I felt it the whole time, and have always felt I was to have a son. I am unsure about the grandparents, if that is my grandparents, or my father, of my boyfriends father that was with him, but I am glad to know that. I was very sad at Christmas time. It was a very difficult time, but I spent it with my mother and brother, and daughter, and that was very comforting. I am not sure what book you mean, but the onesie that I bought for him is still lying on a stack of books on my nightstand. I pick it up and hold it at times, and it gives me comfort. I

    guess my overall question is will I get another chance to carry the pregnancy full term and experiencing him in this lifetime? Also, I have concerns about my relationship with my boyfriend and resolving some of the current issues that we have. I wondered if that maybe was why his father was coming through.

    Thank you for all that you have done for me. It is amazing. If there is anything I can do for you, please ask. Otherwise, I wish you many blessings, and send positive energy your way.

  • MissyMill,

    On your relationship w/BF I suggest a Tarot reading. Tarot is a look into the present situation w/challenges, blocks, environment, etc. It's really helpful. While channeling for you felt that you take-on a lot. Do not take-on more than what you know you can handle and what's best for you. One day at a time. The stack of books w/outfit--your son is present and is validating this. He is w/your grandparents. If you would like a tarot reading, let me know.

  • Yes, I would like a tarot reading.

  • I am not sure how I take on too much. I have scaled things back some to keep balance on my life, but I keep myself busy for mental health reasons. If my mind has too much time to think, I end up in a bad place in my head.

  • Ok, give me a day or so...

  • Thank you so much! Blessings to you!

  • MissyMill,

    You're going by emotions w/this relationship, not so much path. You're path driven, goal oriented. This relationship has turned-up the more emotional side of you--Quuen of Wands past position, paired Queen of Cups in situation. Separation or fear of separation. Feels as though someone has left you before and this drives the more emotional side of you. Perhaps it's your BF. Because the 8 of cups is in the foundation of the present part of your reading, I think it runs deeper than your BF. I get a feeling like your BF has tried to change parts of himself. The lingering "threat" is still there (for you.) I'm getting a time-will-tell scenario here. In the challenges position I drew Death reversed. I don't read reversed cards. Death is accepting change, change is imminent. It's not violent or unexpected change like you'd see in the Tower card. If he left, it'd be too emotional for you, esp. w/the loss/miscarriage. You feel like you have a monkey on your back. Go with what works for you--the tried, true and tested--wheel of fortune in future position. Work on yourself. Get a feeling that you are in counseling. Has he gone w/you. As you work thru things whether something ends or not, doesn't matter. You can make things grow no matter which way the seeds are thrown--to the sky or ground--8 of wands in advice position. I get a feeling someone is contemplating a move, change in location. This move involves money/travel. Balancing work to make it all happen--in environment position. Does someone have kidney issues--thought I'd throw that out there. Overall, I don't think you're ready for the big step in this relationship. Be truthful to yourself. I don't think this relationship is ready (right now) for the big step. I think you're BF has some dependency issues and it's like a ticking-bomb for you. At least that's how it feels thru this reading. What you want to know w/this reading is--Will this relationship work. The advice is about path--be true to yourself and things will flourish.


    present--hierophant rev

    crowning--4 of wands rev

    foundation--8 of cups

    situation--queen of cups

    past--queen of wands rev

    challenges--death rev

    future--wheel of fortune

    blocks--devil rev

    environment/friends--2 of coins

    advice--8 of wands

    outcome--lovers rev

  • Your reading is spot on. Your are right, this has been a very emotional relationship. I wasn't quite ready for it when it happened, and neither was he. He is also very emotional and wishy washy. I sometimes wonder if I am feeling his emotions as well as my own, as I do have some empathic ability. I think we both deal with the fear of separation. I was in love with someone a couple years ago who couldn't commit, and he moved away after about a year for a job and never even asked me to come visit. I was devastated for awhile. The next guy I dated, I moved from another state to be with him and that did not last but a few weeks. So, Yes, I have been burned. He has also endured the same as his wife left him more than once before the final separation. But, indeed, I fear abandonment, which stems back to my childhood and my father, but that is another story. He has made some changes, as have I... but this is still very difficult for me... and indeed, time will tell. Sometimes the emotions are unbearable and I want to walk away... but then I keep feeling that I should give it more time. Yes, I have been in counseling, I have thought about asking him to go as well, but not sure he'd be open to it yet. He has not committed 100% yet, so I feel that would be premature to ask him.

    We have been contemplating a move out to his father's farm. It is further from work as we are not sure about it. But in contemplation, I know that he does want a future with me when we are ready for it. Perhaps I am not ready for it yet. I don't know of any kidney issues at this time. But yes, he is an alcoholic... that poses other issues as well. I know I need to focus on myself,,, but sometimes that is very difficult... I'm not even sure what I need to do to make things better, It leaves me dealing with alot of anxiety. Thank you for the reading. I welcome any additional feedback and really appreciate the time you have devoted to me the past couple weeks. Blessings to you!

  • MissyMill,

    The eight of wands is a card telling you to keep your dreams alive and work on your ideas, path, development. You don't necessarily need someone like you may think--that's my input. I wouldn't build a life around an alcoholic--that's my thoughts.

    I like this. I like channeling better than relationship readings tho. Hope this helps.

  • Thank you! I do try to stay true to my dreams. I know I have to pursue them with or without a partner in my life. I certainly know the downside to building a life with an alcoholic. Both my parents were alcoholics. I don't even know why I want this man in my life so much, or how I even fell for him... I have always avoided people with substance use issues. I frequently consider walking away from the relationship... but I'm just not ready to do it... at least not yet.

    You have been such a blessing to me. May good karma shine down on you.

  • Thank you! I do try to stay true to my dreams. I know I have to pursue them with or without a partner in my life. I certainly know the downside to building a life with an alcoholic. Both my parents were alcoholics. I don't even know why I want this man in my life so much, or how I even fell for him... I have always avoided people with substance use issues. I frequently consider walking away from the relationship... but I'm just not ready to do it... at least not yet.

    You have been such a blessing to me. May good karma shine down on you.

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