Need Help With My Cancer Man..

  • My Cancer man and I have been dating for about 6 months. We've broken up once for sure back in October, but have had a few "breaks" because he needs his time and space...

    I admit I can be clingy, but I just really love him a lot and want to spend time with him, but I feel like he may get overwhelmed.. this last time I was over at his house for about 4 days and the last day he said he wanted me to leave cause he felt smothered. He said his house is really small, he felt like I was everywhere he went and we were just basically in a small space.

    I took it the wrong way and got really upset and left badly..

    I'm not really sure what my question is, but I just need advice from someone who's dated a cancer.. is this normal, the ups and downs? I'm giving him his space, even though I'm really upset and just want to talk to him... what can I expect if he doesn't want to be with me any more?? He assured me he loves me, he's attracted to me, there's no one else, etc.. I just need advice on what to do and how to cope..

  • "I admit I can be clingy..."

    That is your answer. Yes, Cancers are the sign of the crab and can retreat into their shells, but the real issue is the clinging behavior. Did you stay for 4 days because he asked you to or did you just come over one day and then just decide to never leave?

    Shift your focus from the external to the internal. An external focus would be to assume he is the problem and that you need to learn how to deal with him and his issues. An internal focus would be to understand that the problem lies within you and your own self esteem.

  • I think that almost everyone can feel smothered if they are absolutely inseparable from their partner, especially in the beginning of the relationship. I also like spending time with my boyfriend and being at his place, but eventually I'll go home after 3-4 days to have some me time and we both think that is normal, he also need some time for him. I once even made a survey on and found out that couples find it difficult to spend more than a week together if they have been dating for less than 6 months. So, don't take it personally. Instead, use this time for yourself as well. Also don't forget that many married couples have a separate room/a cabinet in which one of the partners can go and have some time for him/her. It's all normal!

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