May I have a love reading please
I am starting to think that it is time to resign myself to being alone as whenever I meet someone it doesnt last more than a few weeks. This has been like this for years now.
I am not sure where it goes wrong and if there is something I am doing that makes these relationships fail.
Is it time to give up or is a life partner out there for me?! If so, will I meet them soon and is thre any insignt as to who and what I may expect?
Hopeful for now!
Have you tried finding the pattern in these failed relationships, for example are your partners of a similar type? Do they give you any clue as to why they finish with the relationship? What are your feelings like throughout the relationship, like at the beginning and at the end? What is your behaviour throughout, etc.
Hi, yes I think they are the same type. I think I withdraw and get fearful when they show interest and then they lose interest and drift off or find someone else. I am currently working on this with a counsellor...
What do you fear will happen after they show an interest in you? Are you fearful of their responses or yours?
I fear they will abandon me (which they do!) I think I feel I am not enough. I dont really know how to get past this behaviour. It is like I start to panic and get anxious, I dont feel I act in a needy way, I do the opposite where I withdraw. Part of me hopes they will notice I am gone and maintain the contact but they probably think I am not interested. I find it hard to show venerability.
I am starting to resign myself to being alone forever, which is ok if thats how it is going to be as I do have a very fullfilled, happy life other than in a romatic relationship way. I was just curious if there was a hint of someone out there for me
Thank you for your time TheCaptain
So you can see you are creating your situation by expecting to be abandoned - and thus you are! The only way to face and fight your fears is to stay in a relationship to see where it will go of its own accord, when you are not sabotaging it subconsciously. You must push through the fear and panic and anxiety. You cannot play games like a child - "see me, love me, make me feel I am good and worthy!" you are crying too late. Ask for it while you are in the relationship.
Thank you. Yes I am working on this at the moment. Better late than never, as the saying goes!
GDavis83 last edited by
You need to believe in yourself and that you deserve love. Isn't this some sign of your low self esteem? Isn't it a sabotage? Maybe take some time to find out what you search for in other person, what kind of partner you want to have in your life and then start dating again. And remember to never give up! I strongly believe there's a person for everyone in this world.
peacemaker last edited by
@v1969 . I am getting a sense that there is something in your past that you have not dealt with in order to move on and be happy. It is awesome that you are working with a counselor and perhaps a hypnotherapist that can help you get through the situation to make yourself willing to not let your fears keep you from moving forward and being happy and at your full potential. Many blessings and hope for good things to come your way.
@gdavis83 @peacemaker sorry only just saw the replies... thank you. I am very happy at the moment just being with myself and do not feel any desire or urgency to be with anyone else. It is a wonderful place to be right now!