Need help please

  • My husband and I are going through a divorce because of a horrible, disgusting crime he committed. It has torn mine and my daughter's world apart. He is currently in a detention center.

    Well, this other guy was pursuing me for a while and I kept pushing him away, but I still have feelings for my husband despite what he did (we were together for 21 yrs and never thought he'd do what he did) and thought maybe if I hooked up with this guy I could drown out the pain (I don't want to put my dirty laundry out there, but the crime he committed is one most men in prison get beat up or killed over...and though it may not seem right on my part, but after what he did, I'm sure God accepts the marriage is done, plus this is a no fault state). I got sucked in bad buy the guy that was pursing me and got hurt yet again. Didn't know the guy had mental problems. He said he was crazy, but we were just silly chatting and I thought he was joking. Well, it turns out he wasn't. He would tell me he wanted my love, wanted me to move in with him, wanted me only, wouldn't hurt me and so on. Yeah right...he has this horrid Jekyll/Hyde personality, and put me through a lot, so we're over and it didn't end well at all.

    I have been hurt by every man I've been with...cheated on, used, abused, treated horribly, you name it. Why? I try to pick out what I think are loving men, but they always hurt me. Is there ever gonna be a NORMAL guy out there for me that will treat me right? I'm certainly not getting any younger and am SO tired of being hurt.

    Please help. Thank you!

  • Oh, I forgot to say that my birth date is 12-13-68, if that helps.

  • Anyone? Please.

  • Hey GingerWaves,

    I am really sorry that yours and your daughter's world has been torn apart by what your husband did.

    I can understand your devastation for not finding the right person for you but I can assure you that there is someone out there! I am not gonna tell you hang on there or go out and search for him. I truly believe that you'll find him when it's the right time. However, that does not mean you should just sit and wait and do nothing. You can go out with friends, spend more time pursuing your hobbies and having time for yourself. And yes, you're not getting any younger, no one is but it is important to treat yourself right and now you have the time to do that. A great idea which I read about online on is to join clubs, either sports clubs, poetry clubs, drawing clubs... doesn't really matter. It is important that you talk to nice people who share the same interest with you. Who knows, you might end up meeting a nice guy who will not hurt you!

    Just give it all this dating idea more time because there is an even more important relationship that that and that is the relationship with yourself!



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