I would like a reading
Hello, this month has been rough with family, relationships and work. I would appreciate a reading to clear the muddy waters
Ukie, for the issue of your family, I drew the advice card of -
The Card of Negativity, Self-Pity, Darkness, or Immorality
You are or will be encountering some form of negativity in your situation. Either negativity has touched you, or is around you in the world, or else you are facing your own inner darkness. Do not counter it with more negativity. Only positive thoughts and actions will turn this kind of problem around. You are urged not to give up or turn from your course just because you encounter negativity in the form of a situation, or other people, or in yourself. However, this may be a time where caution and even retreat would be the wiser course. You must decide by accessing your intuition on how to proceed. Negative people are negative because they lack love, positivity, and a correct interpretation of reality. A lot of times, their negative behaviour is a barrier they erect to protect themselves from the harshness of life. We all must process our inner darkness at some point on the evolutionary journey - and almost certainly many times in this or former lives. It's an ongoing process. If you have a tendency to feel sorry for yourself, and many of us do, things usually progress to the next stage: the pity party. You begin to feel like the innocent victim of a dismal fate because you are seeing your life through dark inaccurate lenses. Most of the thoughts that run through your mind at times like these are not helpful, and they mainly serve to increase your indignation and feelings of powerlessness. What these feelings and thoughts don’t do is change your circumstances or make you feel better. When you have a terrible day, there should definitely be a time and place to have your feelings so you can process them. It’s important not to pretend that you are fine with things when you aren’t. It’s also important, however, to notice when you’re having a pity party. It’s a good idea to set a time limit in which to fully express your emotions and not feel guilty, ashamed, or judge yourself. You may also want to write about your feelings. When your time is up, let go of the negativity you just expressed. If you’ve written down your feelings, you can burn the piece of paper or throw it in the recycling bin. Try not to dwell on unpleasant experiences and do everything you can to avoid holding on to negative emotions. When you indulge in self-pity or negativity, you only make a bad day worse. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, release the notion that you are a victim, and notice the good that exists in your life. The key is to go fearlessly into the heart of the negativity, not to deny it but to let it wash over you...for you cannot understand the light without exploring the darkness. To know and understand something is to know what it is not. Both paths - light and dark - lead to learning and growth. When negativity comes to you, the way through is not to judge or resist or reject it. Otherwise you are feeding your fear, non-acceptance and criticalness, and possibly increasing your pain and suffering. Illness is caused by holding negativity in some part of your body. If negativity is getting to you, you are getting lost in it and are therefore being defined by it. Dwelling on the negative simply adds to its power. Instead, to be healed, observe the negative emotion, let it pass through you to discover why it is happening, why it is having such an effect, and what is the outcome that you are either needing or resisting. It then will have served its purpose and no longer needs to be there. It is released and vanishes, leaving only a divine lesson behind. Dark feelings we have about ourselves and life should neither be ignored nor suppressed, but faced head-on. When we are able to do this, we will find there is far less to fear than we thought. Negative emotions, such as fear, anger, jealousy, and insecurity, exist to alert us to areas of discomfort in our lives, signaling a need for change. In the case of excessive emotional release, for example anger, hatred, or fear, the lesson could be about bringing the centre of your attention into the heart and holding the negative energy within your energy field, as unpleasant as it may be. Holding that energy without immediate release can help dissolve the attachment to it. In which case, a good part of the denseness may then simply ebb away. When a negative emotion arises, try saying, 'Hello, Anger/Fear/Hate (or whatever), what do you want to show me?' And then listen, and let it take you wherever it wants. If negativity is touching you through other people, if you cannot just avoid or ignore them, then you have to deal with them. Don't engage in any negative behaviour in reaction to them, but confront them calmly to establish boundaries of respect and personal ethics, and the consequences of crossing those boundaries. The urge to break the law, to punish, cause harm to or infringe the rights of someone else will not make your negativity go away and may impact on your life even more negatively. You must come to terms with your shadow side first, so you will have less need to explore it in the outside world. Showing others you do not accept or take on their negativity and standing up to them is important for your own self-respect and growth.
For your relationships, I drew the advice card -
The Card of Disorder, Chaos, Irrationality or Anarchy
This card is a warning against being scattered, illogical or letting fear or anxiety make you behave in a disorderly, disorganized manner. Negativity and worry will only keep the hoped-for outcome from materializing. Keep your head, and expect only the best to happen, no matter what sort of chaos is going on around you. Things will soon settle down. You won’t feel anxious, lost or confused forever. It is vital that you maintain a clear head, even when those all around are losing theirs. Sometimes life can feel like quicksand trying to suck you under. But even if you cannot control what goes on around you, you can take charge of your own reactions to it. First you have to take a deep breath and relax! When you are surrounded by chaos or too many demands on you, become as calm as you can inside. You likely already know what you need to do and, by going to this calm inner place so far from chaos, you can see clearly the answers. Let all stress flow away. Take a break. If you’re overwhelmed, simply decide to do less, take on less, be less and have less – just for now. Let yourself come up for air by expending less energy. Money is energy, time is energy, fear is energy, emotion and drama are energy – spend less and release yourself from the pressure of ‘more’. Don’t be afraid to ask for help, to join forces, be vulnerable, open, and collaborative. Express your needs - better to say you don’t understand, don’t like or don’t want to do something early than to muddle through and get stuck later. Find yourself a mentor, guide, advisor, listener, motivator or friend. Being overwhelmed by life doesn’t mean you have to be overwhelmed alone. Reach out, make yourself heard, let yourself be loved and energized by someone else’s assistance and understanding. Turn in the direction of your values and go that way, every day. If each move you make is aligned with what you believe in, what makes sense to you, and what carries you towards what you want, then you’ll find real success. Chaos is unpredictable - you cannot prepare for it. But you can believe in your own inner calm and strength to handle whatever life throws at you.
For work, I drew the advice card -
The Card of Loneliness, Unsociability, Self-Isolation, and Withdrawal
In this situation, you must go beyond your dark moods, overcoming any feelings of isolation or loneliness or a desire for seclusion, to recreate yourself and return to the world where you can do good and achieve your goals. Human beings are naturally social animals. Don’t put yourself in an isolated situation. Go out in public. Our brains do not respond positively to seclusion. Place yourself in social settings and interactions, even if you are among strangers. If you feel shy in public, try going online. Interacting on the Internet may be a good first step in giving you the confidence to express yourself. When you find yourself becoming isolated, you should take that as a warning sign that you are turned against yourself in some basic way. If not already there, you are on a path toward feeling bad, lonely, introverted or even depressed. When you start feeling isolated or lonely, you may have thoughts of not belonging or of feeling rejected by others. What you overlook, however, is that when you are alone, you are often in the company of your worst enemy- the one within yourself. An isolated space is the perfect breeding ground for negative, self-critical thoughts. These thought patterns make up the “critical inner voice ,” an internalized enemy that leads to self-destructive thought processes and behaviours. This inner critic feeds into your feelings of isolation, encouraging you to avoid others and remain in a lonely state. Feeling lonely can trigger thoughts that you are unloved or unlikeable. These reflect a hostile and unfriendly point of view toward yourself. Treat this critic like they were an external enemy, and do not tolerate them. Literally tell them to go away and that you refuse to buy into their destructive message. It is important to always act against any thoughts that people don’t like you. Think about how much of your negative feelings about yourself came from how you felt as a kid. Did you often feel isolated or rejected, unseen or misunderstood? Did you spend time on your own, feeling alone in your family or at school? Feelings of isolation are extremely common. Society can breed a lot of loneliness. Separations, divorces, the loss of our job or our social networks and loved ones can leave any one of us feeling alone. Even shuffling through a crowded street or scrunched together on a subway, one can wind up feeling alone, with no one making eye contact or exchanging a smile. Still, it is better for you on every level to get out and be among people and to never allow your inner voice to make you cynical toward yourself or others. You are not alone in the world or in your feelings. One of the best actions you can take to counteract the hopelessness you may feel is to think outside of yourself. Believe beyond all doubt that you have something to offer. Volunteering is a great exercise in thinking outside yourself and often gives you the opportunity to connect with new people. Even little acts of generosity can have a significant impact. Generosity, as a principle, can lead to stronger self-esteem, which then leads to more social behaviour. The importance of choosing positive thoughts over negative ones is vital to chasing away any feelings of isolation, loneliness or withdrawal. We are all born and someday we’ll all die, most likely to some degree alone. What if our aloneness isn’t a tragedy? What if our aloneness is what allows us to speak the truth without being afraid? What if our aloneness is what allows us to adventure – to experience the world as a dynamic presence – as a changeable, interactive thing?
The over-all advice card for your general situation is -
The Card of Doing the Best You Can
You are always doing the best you can, based on your current beliefs. Every single action you have ever taken thus far in your life was based on what you thought was true at the time, what you wanted to happen, and what you feared might happen. You have made profoundly logical choices that were your best effort to satisfy a legitimate desire. In a sense, you had no choice but to choose what you chose. Any person that held the exact same beliefs, fears, and desires as you, would have made the same decisions. You may not have been aware of the beliefs that fueled your choices, but they played a significant role. It isn't always easy to meet the expectations we hold ourselves to. You may find yourself in a situation such as working to a deadline, studying for a final, trying to pay the bills, and you might have difficulty retaining your sense of peace and calm. A long line at the store, slow-moving traffic, or another stressful situation can unnerve you and leave you wondering why the tranquility and spiritual equilibrium you desire is so quick to dissipate in the face of certain stressors. You may feel guilty and angry at yourself or even feel like a hypocrite for not being able to maintain control or efficiency. However, being patient with yourself will help you more in your soul's journey than frustration at your perceived lack of progress. Try not to expect perfection when following a spiritual or material path. Doing the best you can in your quest for knowledge and growth is vastly more important than striving for perfection. Simply by being aware of what you are experiencing and recognizing that your feelings are temporary, you will have begun taking the necessary steps to regaining your internal balance. Accepting that difficult situations will arise from time to time and treating your reaction to them as if they are passing events rather than a part of who you are can help you move past them. Viewing what you don’t like as a temporary state can be extremely useful at feeling at peace about it. Practicing this form of acceptance and paying attention to your reactions in order to learn from them will make it easier for you to return to your peaceful centre more quickly next time. No one can know for sure what the future will hold. You could pretend that it will be bad or pretend that it will be good. Since it’s an unknown, why not trust and believe that it will be great? Some people act as if it’s more practical or realistic to fear or pretend it will be bad. But neither unknown is more realistic. So why not imagine a future that generates feelings of hope, inspiration and excitement? Optimism or pessimism is an attitude towards the future. It’s a belief about an outcome that hasn't happened yet - you just don’t know for sure what will eventuate. Therefore, neither of them is "more right". They're simply perspectives. But you can look at the effects the different perspectives have on your attitude and behavior. Using a bit of both of them can be very useful. You can be extremely optimistic about the future AND still think about what could go wrong and take action to alleviate those possibilities. Since your experiences won't be similar to other peoples' and your behavior will be shaped by those experiences, you may never stop reacting strongly to the challenging situations you encounter. Even if you are able to do nothing more than acknowledge what you are feeling and that there is little you can do to affect your current circumstances, in time you'll alter your reaction to such circumstances. You can learn gradually to let negative thoughts come into your mind, recognize them, and then let them go. You may never reach a place of perfect peace in this lifetime, but you'll find serenity in having done your best.
These are from my own self-created advice card pack. You may also wish to ask someone else here for some tarot card advice too if that was what you were looking for.
Captain, thank you very much for your insightful reading. I will take your advise and let go of the many things weighing me down at this time.
Ukie, I'll do a reading as well and post to my thread.