So frustrated! Captain or Blumoon, please tell me what spirit says to do...I



  • I am so frustrated by dealing with my fiance's nephew...his mother and grandmother let the little brat nearly get away with murder...he (I almost positive) turned our refrigerator and freezer off or to the lowest setting yesterday while not being properly supervised obviously...these women are either lazy or just rude and I am so emotionally involved I don't think I could get the right answer, or proper answer because I may be self-serving and only hear what I want if I ask myself...I also don't want to upset my fiance who is currently in the hospital...Argh! Please tell me what I can do...

    Laci



  • Bump...



  • If either of you happen to have time...I was just wondering how to get through to other people, like the mother and grandmother of this nephew that they need to keep better track of the children, without being too rude that it starts a fight or all the chaos that generally comes with these women....



  • Is there a reason they need to be in your home while you are not there? Do they live with you?

    I am getting that there is more to this situation for you - there is an emotional charge this is sparking in a deeper place. I am being given "rigidity." Try to be more flexible instead of "my way or the highway." The next thing that came through was manipulation...do you have a fear of dealing with things directly, and resort to other ways of dealing with issues like subtle manipulation or passive aggressiveness?

    Best thing to do is to approach the situation with your head and leave your emotions (anger, frustration, etc.) out of it. Speak with the women from a matter-of-fact, logical point of view without finger pointing or blaming yet also with an open heart. Remember to LISTEN to their point of view.

    The "chaos" you refer to may occur, but if you are calm and centered without your emotions taking over then it will not affect you. You may want to think about what these external influences are triggering for you internally and why.



  • Dear Watergirl, thank you for your response...These women are at my house rather I am here or not because the grandmother is also my fiance's mother/care giver during the day. I have had issues with her and the mother of the little boy before, so that is why I have tried to avoid direct confrontation with them...I don't want to cause (or be blamed for being the cause of) a problem...The manipulation is interesting because I think they manipulate my fiance into getting everything they want...they take advantage of him, and now take advantage of me because we are living in a smaller house and they feel like they can (I think). I know that both women are very sensitive about anyone saying ANYTHING negative about this child ( who really has no control of his behavior, and neither do they)....

    My fiance is in the hospital right now, and he seems to be getting worse and I am so very worried and scared about how they will help him, so I am more concerned about that than the people being at our house right now...I am praying that he comes out of the confusion and strange behavior he is experiencing right now...it is very worrisome...any chance that you might have any ideas on what might be wrong??? We could really use the help...any help to figure out how to help him come back to us... PLEASE!!! 🙂

    Laci