How does a Cancer Women typically act after a break up?



  • Pretty much just what the title says. What is the typical behavior of a cancer women after one has broken up with them?



  • Cancer women are extremely strong and definitely hold their feelings inside. They are so strong that you may never know how much pain she is in. Why do you want to know? Are you planning on breaking up with a cancer? Your question is kind of strange?



  • I wanted to know because I broke up with a cancer because we were just arguing alot, however, I really want to try and fix things. She just seems like she is already detached and has no feelings at all anymore. We were together for five years and she seems like is has no pain no emotion about the whole situation. She shows that is already over it, but i dont believe it, she hasnt contacted me for almost two months now. Is that typical cancer behavior?



  • I have a cancarian friend, she has a very strong personality, however she tends to allow herself to be used by men. She is really a softy inside that crab outer shell but she personifies to the world and obviously yours cancer does to you, that she doesn't need anyone.

    Let me give you some advise, if you are not seeking a relationship that can blossom into a marriage, then don't even bother this cancer woman. Family is everything to a cancer, and they require someone who is on the same wave length as them. She is distancing herself from you, and from my experience she doesn't really want to, but for her own well being she needs to. My friend is in the same sinario, if you really want her back, treat her the way she should be treated. Shower her with time and don't ever not call, when you sayed you would, as this will cause you a set back again. Your whole point is to gain her trust again, for she will not let you in unless she feels she can trust you. When u do call her, never ask of anything from her! This is important, you need to show her that you are capable of taking care of yourself without her help. Therefore in turn this will show her that if you are mature, and capable of taking care of oneself, then you would be capable of taking care of her needs aswell. Leave sex out of the new connection with her, for if u come on to her, she will feel that you will just use her for sex and then leave, not being really interested in her at all. Sex will come after the connection has been made. Leave her "thinking about you messages"...don't make her feel guilty about not being with you, or how she is making you feel. Short and sweet is the key. If you are going by her house, drop by to say hello, see if there is anything she needs help with...offer her the help unconditionally, for if you ask for compensation, this interaction has now turned into a business one. If you know she likes something, and you happen to see it on sale, or such, then pick it up for her, this will show her you are tuning in to her likes and dislikes, you are connecting, listening, being caring and considerate. I know she would and has probably done the same for you when you were together 5 years. My cancer friend does that even for me.

    She may seem detached and such with no emotions because after 5 years and not moving forward with you into some form of serious relationship, she is feeling you were a waste of time..and she will not do it again with you unless you step up and take it to the next level with her. I can guarantee that she is probably seeking someone for marriage, so be prepared. Think this through, if you are not ready for that step, then just move on to someone else who is willing to go another 5 years with you with no real interest in marriage and such! Good Luck!



  • see the thing was i was ready to actually marry this woman. We talked about it all the time. She is the first woman that I have ever even considered that for, marraige that is. And I would love to do the things that you said in your reply. There nothing more that I want to show. The thing is though she hasnt even called or contacted me in almost to months. I havent gotten a phone call or anything from her. Im just afraid that she has fully moved on and Im here stuck with my feelings. I want to fight for her, I want her back but I dont even know where to begin. so pretty much im in this never ending circle. I mean should I just assume that she already has moved on because she hasnt contacted me or showed that she even still cares for the the past two months?



  • like me, i am cancerian and when i'm hurt, i will retrieve. i can also say some of the meanest things when hurt that i don't need you blah blah probably like most women when they are pist. my suggestion is contact her anyway. what do you have to loose? if she doesn't respond then move-on. i've had people in my life both romantic and non-romantic who have pissed me off beyond words and they come back and return and really pour the truth and i give another chance. we are also very forgiving but when you hurt too much and not show anything that you have changed or make things better, we can also nip you w/ our claws to leave us the f%^& alone or just give a silent treatment. good luck.



  • based on my experience both personally and professionally, assuming is not a good thing. it's always good to hit the source and find out the truth no matter how minute or embarrassing the question/inquiry maybe.



  • ive contacted her three times through email.....ive even contacted her for closure. ive got no response from her. I cannot even get closure from her so I can move on.



  • Oh my god you are such a good friend to her i read all that you wrote and it is all so true what you say about the cancer women because i am a cancer woman myself god has blessed her for having such a good friend like you, i hope that he can appreciate all that you say you hit the spot with cancer.



  • is that sarcastic?? Id like to be her friend, but she wont even let me. I want to be her bf but she wont let me. I have all these feelings for her after we broke up and I dont know what to do with them.



  • Well now you know how she felt when you broke up with her. Somethings you just can't change and lets face it, you can't change this. Your cancer girl has to want it to change and only she is in control. To tell you the truth, I don't know if I would trust you with my heart again. You may just have to admit defeat and move on. If she is not calling you or responding to any of your attempts to contact her that pretty much says it all. Now pick yourself up and live with grace, pride and dignity.



  • so your telling me thats its? as soon as a cancer makes up their mind theres no looking back? I contacted her three times, this was in the earlier stages of the break up. The issues we had were big, but not as big as what other couples have been through. I didnt do all the typical male bs, were they begged, showed up unannounce and pretty much stalk the person they broke up with. I gave her her space. So theres nothing I can do. Nothing I can do to convince the person I care and love to give it another shot. Im supposed to just lay down and forget five years like she has?? You talk about it that its easy, its not easy to watch the one person you care about the most just walk away, with out saying a word. I have my pride, I have my dignity, I never lost it because I never begged and stalked her. But i dont believe that, thats it. I did everything for this woman, when she said jump I said how high. Theres nothing I would not do for her. With that said how do you gain back the trust of a cancer? I dont want to give up on the person I care about my life, its been almost two months since we have broken up. It was five years that we were together. I cannot believe that she is fine and ok with everything, thats just not a human, to forget everything in two months with no emotion.



  • The good news is she has definitely not forgotten about you or stopped thinking about you. As a cancer woman, I promise you that is not the case. However, I think someone else mentioned this earlier, that doesn't mean that she is not trying as hard as she can to move on. Which means not contacting you and not responding to you.

    Cancer women take very seriously letting people into their lives/hearts. Violate or disrupt that trust, and it will take an EXTREME amount of work and patience to build it back up.

    If you really want to get back with her, contacting her three times in two months is not nearly enough. You are going to have to show that you are determined not to live without her.

    I am not guaranteeing that she hasn't moved on. But I am saying that it doesn't sound like you have done enough to convince the average Cancer woman that you are serious about getting back together. And since you were the one that broke up with her, you are going to have to put in a lot of hours on this one.

    Good luck.



  • how am i supposed to do that, she told me dont call her or contact her, this was in the beginning, so im just respecting what she asked. I just dont want to keep contacting her and push her further away, thats why i havent tried. I really want to, trust me, everyday i think about her, and everyday all i want to do is tell her that. But i dont want to beg for it, i dont want to push her away and make her lose all repsect for me cuz im begging. So how do I show her without begging or without pushing her further away?



  • Oh, I firmly agree with Hardbody... I am a cancerian, and if I was in a relationship that was going nowhere, and the guy just up and broke up with me... oh, just even imagining it frightens me. I would manifest that break up to a series of self-revelations... My defenses would be up... I would just shut down externally. Inwardly, I'd cry and cry and cry and hate myself soooo much for being so taken for a fool. Hate. I'd then tranfer that hate towards the male. And if left to brood, I'd hate and hate and hate. But then after a year... depending how long the relationship and heartbreak was... I'd probably be more peaceful... but I'd hate. Yes, I'd be soo angry and not wanna have anything to do with that person (indifference), and perhaps even my family would agree with me as well, and I would ask for their guidance. I would retreat to some place safe.. like family or my home or just another place altogether and start anew and just be with me... focusing on recharging my energy, and just thinking about my actions.

    But I would definitely want the other person to suffer, and feel my emotional pain. It's not good, but to try and knock some sense into the your cancerian female will be tough... she wants to the aggressor... here... if she was with you for that long... and you just let her go .. just like that... you are going to lose her forever. I told my one friend, you knew i hate you and put all my emotions down, why didn't you communicate!?! Just find me and communicate, make sure I listen... because if I am only listening to my wounded self, I won't ever come back to you. Just be open, direct, honest and persistent ... she demands loyalty and trust... even when she's crying and tells you she doesn't want to see you anymore, see her!!! sheesh, 2 months without even telling her how you still feel just a text????? Just communicate, in person! she's avoiding you like the plague right now, because it is self-preservation of the heart. Think of rhett butler from hone with the wind, she wants the passion of the scorpio man or the firery intensity of the aries to knock some sense into her, but she must be reasoned with. Well... hahah, in my case, just make her think about the good things... she's probably bathing in all the negativity and hate ... this is your opportunity to be a man and dammit, go after her!



  • As a Cancer woman myself, I like most cancers have had a share amount of lovers and serious relationships. All relationships are serious to us. Here is something to understand about a cancer if you do speak with her... preferably in person as this is cancer's preferred method of communication.

    Get ready to hear things that bothered her from months ago. Like that time you didn't respond to her emotionally, or maybe you pushed her away unknowingly, or better yet you told cancer something that deeply upset her being and trust. Right now, you have no idea but when a cancer is upset we will unleash every upsetting circumstance we had with you. Our memories are very precise, especially the emotion we felt at the time.

    My advice, listen, don't try to defend yourself as she will start shutting down and pulling it back. She needs to unleash this negative emotion, let her freak out, get angry, cry, get crazy for a minute and then she will see that instead of you judging her craziness you actually are there to support her. Once this is done she will open her heart back up, it will be very guarded but it will be there, she might take a while to open up and depending on how well you physically were in tune she might actually want to be with you to calm her mistrust with other men. After this time you should be very careful with your words for quite awhile, as everything you say she will be reading between the lines. A cancers worst fear after letting someone back in is that they will leave us again to the point that they will avoid contact with you just so you can't say those dreaded break up words.If you want to be with her you should let her know. Ask what she needs out of you to make it work and don't expect an answer for a while. She needs time to go back to her home and think about what she really wants.

    I was with a man for 5 years, he was a cancer as well. Two cancers don't mix well, not in this case at least. For the last 2 years of the relationship I hated him. I hated the way he breathed even. Finally he left me for another woman, and honestly I pushed him to leave. I stopped being intimate, I stayed out late, I didn't make our home a home anymore. I'm telling you this so you can think about this, did she push you away? If she did than rest assured she has moved on, she was still hurt sure because in reality cancers must have utmost loyalty and we test this in every phase of the relationship until marriage. If she doesn't have a ring on I can assure you she was doing the same, at the first intuitive thought that you can't provide a secure place at all times and your loyalty is undying she will either go off or retreat and push you away.

    If this is the case she will simply tell you, and don't worry plenty of time has passed for her to calm down and take the hate away from the decision. Cancers live very fast and we move quickly on the emotional plane. She is most likely going to put it very matter of factly so those old emotions don't come back, most likely she will say she is done and that will be the end of the conversation.

    Then again she might have done a little soul searching and wondering now why you didn't want her, or she might be like me and realize your an idiot. If a cancer girl truly loves you then you most likely have met your soul mate and a devoted and loyal lover, wife, and mother. She will always put you first, you will be her first thought everyday, when you are upset she will feel it, her intuitive side will know if you can't express your feelings. Was it love from the get go for her, because if it was then she was created for you from the heavens themselves. If you were friends first then you will remain friends and never true lovers. If this is the case, move on, quit wasting both of your times and contact her around the holidays by text saying merry xmas, whatever... She will eventually become a great friend and even ask you for dating advice.

    Regardless, you have to contact her, as she will not contact you, she is too vunerable to go through that loss again.


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