Captain please help x

  • Captain I hope you don't mind me reaching out to you for advice.. I could do with some insight. Would you please have a look a the compatibility of my current relationship.

    Nick: 05/02/1985

    Me: 18/09/1990

    I am a realist and he is an idealist, and as much as if like to move in with him as he has now suggested, I am terrified of making a mistake but he is in this mad rush. I want to make sure we are right for each other by looking over the finer details.

    Any insight on the two of us would be really really appreciated.

    Hope you are doing great,

    Kalli x

  • About Nick - He has trust issues, and trouble opening up about the way he feels or even the true state of his physical health. In love and life, he is a born nurturer. He has a strong desire to be needed, so he may often find himself the caretaker of his family, friends and anyone else who strays into his territory. He loves to take care of others but needs to be careful that he doesn’t just offer practical rather than emotional help. He prefers mental matters to emotional ones. He is incredibly bright and thrives best with a partner who can match his wit but who also doesn’t outsmart him.

    About you - your life challenge is to learn how to deal with conflict and to be assertive (standing up for yourself) without being aggressive. There is something quite feline about you; like a cat, you can be devoted and available one moment, independent and elusive the next. Although you can be sociable and are an extremely attractive individual, few will get to know you very well; even getting to close to you is no guarantee that you will commit in any way. You are highly sensitive and, when you are hurt, your natural reaction is to seek solace in books, ideas or your work. This stifles your emotional growth and you need to put your creative energy into reaching out and connecting with others instead. Sure, you may get hurt, but until you can take that risk and put your heart on the line, you will feel lonely and misunderstood. Part of the reason you tend to vanish or isolate yourself from time to time is that you tend to have a low stress threshold, feeling that the best way to deal with conflict is to withdraw and reflect in private. Problems, however, arise when the need to withdraw and regroup becomes a need to hide or escape; conflict, although unpleasant, is essential for your psychological growth.

    Together you and Nick are not good at love. You do not share yourselves easily. Though this would seem to be a natural combination, one possibly made in heaven, it is hard to imagine how two such fiercely independent souls ever got together in the first place. It's not that the two of you are really any more independent than other people, but your relationship certainly brings out this quality in abundance. Capable either of teaming up closely or seeing each other rarely, adopting the same ideology or battling out opposing points of view, being scarily on the same wavelength or totally incommunicado, the two of you will not bind each other to strict rules or established patterns. Yours is the kind of relationship where you might not see each other for years and then take up exactly where you left off, virtually in mid-sentence. A love affair or even a friendship here is not particularly oriented toward emotional expression. The emphasis is more on thought, wit, intelligence and speech than on anything else. Emotion is not ruled out by any means but it is secondary to matters of the mind - although it can in fact be enhanced by them. It's an odd happenstance but the two of you meeting for the first time can often feel closer - or angrier and more upset - with each other than you have ever felt with anyone else. Past lives or karma is inevitably suggested by such meetings, which may also involve feelings of déjà vu.

  • Thank you captain this was of great help to me and very insightful. Everything you pointed out I could agree with. Thanks again for your time xx

  • Captain I struggle with opening up and being my true self in the above relationship, why is this how do I overcome it? Another thing is he is very critical in nature and it is affecting me as he will critisize everything from appearance to personlaity. How do I deal with this, part of me agrees with the things he says as that is my inner insecurities talking but I don't know why he does it. Do u feel this man loves me?

  • This man is not in your life to give you love - he is too insecure for that. He is with you to help you bring out your ability to stand up for yourself and not take his rude behaviour. He only taunts you to make himself feel better. This is not love and the sooner you come to love yourself, the sooner you will refuse to tolerate this abuse.

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