I am not sure if I am still in love with my husband and still in love with my Ex
I don't know what to do! I love my husband, but he has many problems and so does my ex-boyfriend/fiance, but I still and always will love him! My husband has done so many things to cause our relationship to fizzle out..if you know what I mean. My ex and I never had that problem and the making up part was wonderful! I do not have that with my husband and I am not attracted to him anymore. He is such a good person and father and husband as well, BUT he just has problems that are putting a tremendous strain on our marriage and causing me way to much stress! What do I do? I have children and I don't want to make it hard on them but most of the time my oldest child asks me questions like "are you and dad getting a divorce?" and " I think you would be happier if you two had some time apart." That alone can make a mother feel like a total loser of a parent. I ask you all again, What do I do? If anyone wants to talk about this I will get into more detail about what my husband is doing to ruin our marriage. If anyone is having the same or similar problems or feelings that I am, then please write me back.
Also my ex is not the reason for me wanting to leave, but I really never got over him when I got married and now that things are falling apart with my husband and I, it makes me miss what we had (the ex & I ) even more.
You know I used to wonder why there would be a topic that no one would respond to... I now know!
When people ask questions that they full well know the answer to... they get igged!! LOL
just funnin' girl!
You KNOW you still love your ex! Now do you, can you stay with him is the question... I'll just offer this little bit. A child living in a house of pain.. is a pained child, EVERYTHING hurts, and don't think that just because a child is a child, they will not pick up on and be aware of every aspect of the problems...
Do what you feel, buit remember... you are not alone....
Take some steps to end this marriage as soon as you can. If your kids are noticing it enough to ask you about it, then it's having a detrimental effect on all of you, not just you and hubby.
I would offer this nugget of wisdom though: keep space between your marriage (once you leave) and any new relationship. Have some time to yourself and your kids. But don't take this baggage into any new relationship, even your ex. Keep him as a friend for the time being. I relate to a fair degree to what you're going through, but it can be so hard not only to make a decision, but to make a MOVE. The new year sees you free of this, so take heart. Hubby is hurting big time, but he's in his own space and not all that aware of the effect he's having on you or anyone/anything. Is he a Cancer? I'm a crabbie meself, and I know how self-absorbed we can get at times ...
Good luck. You will make the right choice for yourself, even if it takes a bit of time to work up the courage. xoxoxoxoxoxoxxo