BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
Just when I thought things were chaotic enough, I have in the last week, run into difficulties at work with a team member. I have been largely filling in her shifts because she has gone on workers compensation, for the third time in two years.
There is great suspicion at work that she is trying to rort the system, and if she is, then she's doing a great job at getting away with it. She's been pulled off the shift she was doing because she can't perform all the duties. And hasn't she been whingeing and whining about it!
She's been needling at me whenever she gets the chance, or so it seems, but doesn't do this to anyone else who fills in when I'm on days off.
About two years ago, we both applied for this job, but she got it over me. I was happy for her then, thinking she might finally be happy herself. Not so. She has never wanted to do what is required in the job and whinged and b*tched about working weekends, which is the main part of what the job is about.
I'd like the job myself, and of course wonder what will happen with this woman? We've had some cutbacks happening at work, so I'm unsure if she actually quits, that this job will be re-advertised or not.
So my question is: Will this woman finally quit and give us all some peace? Will this job be advertised, and if so, will I finally luck in and get it?
She has caused so much trouble on the team, especially in recent months. And unless I'm being paranoid, she seems to be targetting me the most, and I'm over it!
Thanks for your insights
Don't ask us - ask your supervisor. Don't wait for it to be advertised or you could be passed over. Put your hand up for the job so that they know you are interested. The bosses can't read your mind. Tell them that you know the other woman is not happy in the position and that you would like them to know you very much are, if the position becomes vacant. Strike while the iron is heating up - be assertive and go after what you want. At least they will know you are keen. Nobody gets anything by sitting around waiting and hoping for it.
I can mention it to my supervisor, but things work differently in the health system. Just because someone expresses interest in a position, doesn't mean they'll get it. I've learned the hard way in the four years I've worked there that seniority means nothing anymore, and it doesn't matter if you work your a** off in a particular shift (or all) that you're going to be actually GIVEN it, or anything. That's why I asked for a psychic opinion. Although I guess the higher ups have their own plan and if I'm meant to get it, I will. But I sure will be quietly making a bit of noise about my interest in it, as well as the fact that I was next in line for it when she got it. We'll see ...
I feel you have fallen into a life of passivity and negativity, Moonie. Don't wait for change - be the change you want! This is a new world and the way things used to be is not how they will be. Don't get stuck in old thinking.
On this issue, there's no old thinking going on. I know how the health system works. But I was talking to our second in charge last night and mentioned my interest in this job, and my willingness to work weekends which the other girl hasn't been willing to do. She said that even if it's not re-advertised due to the cutbacks, it's very likely I'll "fall" into the job anyway to give continuity in that shift. That's also why she rostered me in it so much, which suits me to a t.
So long as I keep my end up I should end up with it if this other girl actually quits or gets her medical retirement which is what we suspect she's after. Again as I said, we'll see! But I can SMELL IT ... lol!
Because I sense you have doubts about your ability to have what you desire I am getting the urge to step in and pump up the advice and your resolve. This situation is not all about your coworkers underhanded behavior but is about you and life helping you step out of victim thinking and to raise your energy with personal power. Captain is right---this situation calls for you to dominate and lead---spirit shows me the angel card saying you are called to LEAD your way through this challenge. Your real enemy is your self depreciating all that can go wrong dialogue in your head. Your situation is common in the workplace and yes there are politics to maneuver but ALWAYS leave room for magic and personal power. It is always to your advantage to connect with a higher up in an honest way. Higher ups do not have time to watch all the gears of the machine working....that's how employees can get away with things. There will always be that one employee who is controlling yet does not have the skills to be a leader so they control and manipulate secretly. And they do back stab or mostly they try and make their victim behave badly by setting them up. They know deep inside they are a fraud so they are always watching their backs and will target the person they consider their competition. This situation is an excellent opportunity for you to buck up on skills to protect yourself. It is the ego she wishes to goad in you---to bring you to her level as really she knows you have an advantage (you really do !) You are a bit passive about that. Spirit is strongly saying that your first defense is your thinking. Any time you catch yourself over analyzing the situation with negative dialog ..... just stop it. Let Karma do it's work. Make yourself known! If you want to move up you must pass into that place of team work
that woman is lacking that. To advance you must show the company you are invested and will go the extra mile. This must be genuine and will you be ok with this in reality?.. because that is the price of a position with more responsibility. Since you can't watch your back 24 7---or control others back stabbing it is wise to be known to higher ups. If you do work hard and have ethics and they know that then they will see anothers back stabbing as a lie. Also spirit advises giving less thought to this coworker---you leak energy and she likes that---she loves rattling your chain. Wait for opportunity to take charge----spirit does guide you and timing is key. Trust in this and you will worry less. Avoid victim thinking. Yes, she is on her way out. And you will probably meet many more like her so gather these skills now. Find that leader you admire and let her or him mentor you. Teachers show up when you are ready and your situation is something your higher ups have all had to deal with on their way up. BLESSINGS!
PS---I saw your other post asking if you had a curse on you. I hope it was just a bad day! Please, again, control those thoughts. Thoughts are your power.
Guys, it's been a bad week! But I managed to have a talk to my boss who returned from holidays yesterday. I rang her to welcome her back and tell her she was missed, because she's been very stressed and we don't want to lose her. During the chat I mentioned I wanted to chat to her when I came back to work on Thursday. She insisted I tell her then, so I filled her in on things that had been going on, told her how I'd reacted and dealt with the situation. I'm no angel, and give as good as I get but with humour usually. On the Monday I decided not to fall victim to this idiot. It was yesterday I talked to the boss. Everyone knows what this girl is up to. We have all had a rather difficult month at work and with being overworked, tired and stressed, I have let things get on top of me. Add to that, bickering with my foster son added more fuel to the fire I let myself fall into. But I simply texted him saying "love you" "have a good day" without mentioning the reason for the bickering, even though his lack of keeping promises has annoyed me no end because it's affected me and two friends of mine.
There have been more like her before actually! And I've dealt with them in my own way and managed to win over those situations. This current woman has been the straw that almost broke the camel's back. In talking to the 2ic (or acting boss) and the boss herself I know now I only need to keep doing a good job and not give up. Sadly in the health system, a person doesn't always get anywhere just by doing a good job. I'm still casual after four years, but we have had cutbacks on hours, etc., in recent times and that can be a real drain on morale. With those cutbacks it prevents permanency even more than usual.
But this job is my chance of getting at least three permanent days a week, so I know I want it badly and yep, have been thinking of what can go wrong ...
Thanks Blmoon and Captain! This has been one of the most challenging times emotionally for me, because all I have been seeing lately is the dark side: one thing after another.
This is my opportunity to finally let the chains my family put around me go, for once and for all. I thought I'd got over that because I'm a big one for saying "you can't blame your upbringing forever" and yet, I've been doing exactly that; letting their negativity and ignorance of me keep me down. Amazing how something like that can still have a very dark effect on someone in middle age, but the amount of times I've tried to repair the damage without laying myself out and they've thrown it back in my face ... and it was my nephew who finally clinched the deal for me.
They are of n o consequence in my life anymore. I won't try again because they don't deserve it.
Looking back from 60......the fifties are liberating. If we have surrendered to growth all our lives we find healing in our fifties. Sometimes big storms move us to final resolve....we see our patterns clearly but mostly we are desperately sick of our wounds. We make changes in our fifties. We speak up more in our fifties. Welcome to the wisdom and rewards of the "crone". BLESSINGS!
Ah, yes, the wisdom of the crone. You know, while I am welcoming of this phase, and its rewards of wisdom and liberation, I need to ask this: Couldn't someone think of a better word to describe it than CRONE??? Lol!!
Blessings to you too Blmoon, and Captain
I HEAR YOU!!! I prefer GODDESS!
Well, crone does sorta conjure up images of the witch and the cauldron and the warts and the hooked nose ... !? Goddess is much, much more appropriate methinks!!
Metaphorically, the crone's image lacking superficial beauty represents an appreciation for more inner beauty and the breaking loose from our attachments to ego and what others think. Some women who have not gathered inner beauty have a harder time aging but a wise woman embraces the liberation. Still, do I like aging? h e ll no! But looking back at my youth I am saddened that I did not see my beauty! l look at pictures of myself and see I was beautiful yet I did not think so! Such is the foolishness of youth. Now I listen to the crone who says always be happy where you are! Instead of focusing on my sags and bags and wrinkles. And what's up with the arm flaps? I should be wise to love my beauty now---if I live to eighty even ninety and look back to a picture of 60, I'm sure it would be a beautiful picture by comparison! So yes the crone sounds like a buzzard. But like magic the Goddess appears when appreciated! The crone weeds out the people in our lives who can not see with their hearts. BLESSINGS!
I think I'm actually seeing that. I've been EXPERIENCING it, but not SEEING it. That all those who operate from an egotistical sense are being removed from my life. It started with my family, then my ex husband, etc. I found myself talking to a single guy who I work with. He's a bit older than me and VERY untrusting and bitter. He said I should've gone for half of the house when I left my ex. My response? Maybe. But I wanted OUT and knew him too well and how much more unpleasant things would've been if I'd gone for my share, which would've only amounted to around $20,000. Again he said, "I would've gone for it anyway". Well, I got a wee bit angry. I said FOR HEAVENS SAKE why is everything about money? I'm not stupid enough to think we can't survive without it, as such, but for relationships and marriage to be all about money is WRONG and why there is so much wrong in this world. Don't know if he even partially agreed with that! And don't care
Maybe I'm naive, but gee ... ? So in this case, I feel I might've been educating a wee bit. But this fellow and others like him will never really GET it.
Like you, I look back at photos of me in my teens and twenties and wonder why on earth did I think I was too fat, etc?Hmph! I look in the mirror these days WITHOUT MY GLASSES MIND YOU, and see an attractive slightly overweight woman of nearly 52. That's what I see now. On bad mornings I see wrinkles and a buddha belly. They are becoming fewer and further between these days.
My biggest bug-bear is the emotions; how I react emotionally to situations. Sometimes it's hard to actually see that a person acts a certain way and that it's not a personal attack on me, as such. That's the thing I'm having the hardest time dealing with.
Overall though, I'm tired of the way most people think. The girls at work are trying to set me up with this guy I was talking about and I've said NO. Good God, why are you trying to foist him on me when he's not my type, annoys the cr*p out of me and I don't trust him as far as I can kick him? I wonder sometimes if some of them have trouble with the fact that I'm single, have been for nearly two years and haven't given up yet. Boy, surely I have a right to be a bit choosy?? Or are they saying that I'm getting older and running out of options? Probably!
Boy people can be challenging!
Thanks again Blmoon!
Moonie, if you haven't given up wanting to meet people, there's a website called meetup.com where you can join groups in your area (or even start one) to attract those who share your particular interests - everything from hobbies to spirituality and the paranormal. My sister (recently divorced and very lonely) joined up and met some lovely people. She goes out all the time now.
Well Captain, everything is worth a go! Through putting up what I call a "doubtful" status on facebook (haha) and refusing to take it down which is what I usually do (go figure) a lady I'd had contact with a few years ago through alpacas responded and sent me a private message. She works as a counsellor at a voluntary organisation in a town about 50ks away from me. I'm going there Wednesday morning. I need to find strategies to keep me positive when it seems like all is lost lol!
I'll have a look at this site! why not? Like I said, everything is worth a go! Thanks again Captain
patchlove last edited by
I belong to a Metaphysics Meetup and I love it!
And I am so enjoying your dialogue, Moon,Bl, and Captain. Being 55 I am so in tune with what you are saying.
Inner Goddess Reveal!!!