It is not over Blmoon...!



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  • yes---this painting is me----pink is going to be around at least all year. It's a universal colour really right now as well as the teal blue---60's retro. I am considering repainting my Paris room in a pink but still want to maintain the decor. This shade is nice. And like me the painting is in constant movement---blooming new buds as fast as one declines----so many stages of blooming. I am a big multitasker and prefer working alone at home because once I get moving I'm doing projects---I get self conscious around others as it looks crazy I'm sure. I put things in a closet but then notice another chore and do that. I get a lot done but get testy at people in my way or if they interrupt me with dumb questions. I keep moving until I drop. I will have an allergy reaction after that and be slow for the next day so if I'm stirring up dust I try to pack in a lot. Your worries about money are a common challenge as really it attracts money NOT to worry. Not easy. I have juggled money on the edge all my life but last year has been nice as I did come into a surplus after doing the abundance meditation with depok and even bought a copy----I need to get back to that good habit. This year is good for those who have done the work. Your obstacle is that apartment right now and if spirit is not solving it it means you have a lesson or an exercise to master there. I believe you are close to getting out of there. You have to fight that vampire energy that sucks the life out of you. You have mastered keeping your power around your x and that is good as it means that lesson is coming to a close and with that the house the divorce can be ended and solved. I am hearing that you can pray to your lovely strong neighbor who passed for help since she had mastered power over the negative energy there. You can not be helpless


    your strength lies in ownership of your space. You find it easier to own a place you can love. The apartment is more of a challange but if you can be defiant and command that energy to leave it will. The spirit that moves around the area will go the route of least resistance. Practice visualization and fierce defiance. Get a how dare you attitude about this energy s ucking invader. Be the strong woman who holds the lamb. It's the lamb in you this energy is attracted to. I know it sounds crazy but you must respect the energy of a place and be aware to live a good life. Just as you must see the house as having an energy to get it sold. Continue to not leave it to your x---he is not dealing with things and has too much emotional chaos. He is ambivalent about selling. He has not done any deep introspection about who he is and why and you have done deep soul searching so you need to lead. He is self destructive and will not do the best hing. Keep in close friendly touch with the selling agency. His lack of interest has manifested into their lack of interest. You must connect with someone there and keep your positive interest alive. This is good karma for you as in the past your desire to have a strong man take care of business led you out of power. Now you can close that lesson. DOMINATE this house sale----it is YOUR life. BLESSINGS!



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  • I posted here last night and it disappeared! It was short---just a big hug and pat on the back as your insights are excellent and you have great clarity! And lessons are never over. Bummer. But they are rewarding. As for thinking of snappy comebacks for your x.....we all do that----hindsight is always more brilliant. This painting is delicate but gives off such strength! All blooms are at their peak freshness---you can almost smell them. I still sense a surprise of sorts from your x----I believe he feels his loss of the reigns and he'll be dam ned if he's left holding your purse for you

    : ).......his intention is to confuse you ...whatever it is. You will see through it. BLESSINGS!



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  • In his presence you will always have power over him----for that he must hurt you, desperate for retreat. The conundrum of this is what begins from love acts not at all like love. It is love he is at war with. It's never been just you. All his relationships, no woman will feel loved no matter how demanding they get for validation.. Because of his unresolved mother issues he must repeat his pathology. Even if the woman was not that person he would create situations to facilitate his self made prophecy of how "woman are" (he will make them bad)----his fear dominates his life. And he leaves his women feeling very invisible----it chips away at their self worth if they stay too long. He seems from a distance to jump hoops for his lov ers but there is much unhappiness behind closed doors. When imagining their life always choose the possibility that is kindest to YOU and loves you most : ) BLESSINGS!



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  • MY POST DISAPPEARED!! Give me some time to answer! Again.



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  • beautiful pics!! Reminds me of life in Chicago went the GREAT lake Michigan goes wild and leaps over the highwayy running beside it around the city. I'm in the south but up north people are suffering with horrible ice and snow storms that close everything down. We just get unusually cold weather here with a few freeze warnings that have me covering plants as our southern greenery does not do well when the temperature dips. I am having a terrible time with picking up TOO MUCH! So do not take my absence personal. I pick up others pain and that nasty energy around you does not like me at all.This not your or anyone's fault. It's what I deal with. Your Scorpio friend really needs you----you help him. Expect him to take take two steps forward and one step back all the way. I know you can't see it but he is good for you and you for him. As irritating as his blind eye is it allows you to speak up and be yourself around him. He will divorce her but it's going to be hard, as it involves total change and at his age a challenge. Remember his pacifier---or addiction is busy distraction so he will go back to that--like falling off the wagon but you are a good friend---and good friends do not let friends lie to themselves. i get your delima about the house---you do belong there. I still get your x has something hiding from you about the house----someone stays there and money is involved. You do need to get away from that apartment. I'm in neck shoulder pain at the moment so can only give you a bit. Your depending on that student for funds is rightfuly iffy---trust your gut. Spirit suggests there is an avenue to money you haven't explored yet.. Give me a day to see if it comes to me and you should pray for an alternate choice as well---I do remember seeing the money offer in Feb. for you but Spirit did not show me if it had a challenge to it. I'll get back to you. BLESSINGS! At the moment my feelings are you need to be at the house as much as possible to get it sold as the x is working against you and something is hidden you need to know.



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  • YES, actually I wrote you yesterday and got interrupted and saved what i wrote but never had a chance to get back to you and it was lost. First thing is OF COURSE HE IS SEETHING! This is a very good thing! Not that you will not have to work hard but the fact you actually made a move he could not see coming is poking the bear. AND if you had just showed up without notice you may find out what he's hiding from you. The fact he did not answer means that he feels ok---now I'm back in control, let her wait on me, let her get REAL nervous about ME...ME ME ME! And you are. And with your situation in that energy sucking apartment you are really going to have to dig deep to muster your power. It will be easier to even the playing field at least and get him ruffled to a weakness. On the positive side that house energizes you once you settle in and most likely he will greet you with some surprises to tick you as he knows you like the house a certain way so prepare yourself to not get immediately upset but instead do what you do best....make it warm and welcoming. It is still your house........your girlfriend had good advice call her if you need a pep talk and do not let him bully you. His power over you has always been through your emotions. He gets you upset, fearful and you back off. This is not forever so just call it round two. You DID change the pattern last visit. He has never hit you so you need to get clarity about how he makes you afraid. His anger gets to you. Why? Where is your anger? The firm resolve kind....not the weak defensive kind. But the "rise above you can't touch me kind". You have the right to be there and the right to oversee this sale. His weakness is control. Remind him of how gracious you are to give him notice. Perhaps you will drop in withe little notice if he is going to growl at you ---tell him that and when he replys do not answer. Beat him at his own game without sinking to his level. You are to the attacker, he is, you have the right to protect your well being. Arguing depletes you, causes physical reactions. Know your weakness so you can feel it coming on and reserve yourself. Retreat is not defeat it is often a wise saving up energy to endure the long haul. He will be the one walking away because he is best at being passive aggressive with his button pushing he is afraid of his anger and if he feels too angry and can't say something to crumble you to hide then HE will run and hide. He anticipates your behavior to be civilized and appropriate. Plant some seeds of fear in him. He has plenty to worry about because I really think he rents space in that house and the person who stays is no stranger so they put up with the situation and they are getting a good deal...he did say to that person that on rare occasions they may need to leave and here you are coming back? If he barks at you again say look if this is how you are going to behave I will not announce my visits ...then end the conversation. Even if there is a clause saying you can't do that , act like you do not care. You are more afraid of him because he is not to be trusted. He leaves you wondering. Unfortunately, reasonable people are also predictable people. Plant a seed of doubt, he needs to be working up a fear of just what you will do. AND it will all be psychological just like he gets to you. You need to talk with your son about strategy, tell your son that you know in the past you have let him get to you but you have grown a lot and tell him if he senses you are about to buckle you welcome him to snap you out of it. Think about what your x fears and you can say things that are not real but just meant to irritate him. This is your weapon......turning defense to offence. The moment you find yourself defending yourself stop and turn the tables. He says things on purpose to get you in argument mode and then next thing you know you must lie down with a headache and your whole body clenches. Then you have inflammation flare ups. Fight back in a way that is not throwing energy OR ABSORBING energy. Make absurd statements with no further explanation. Do not argue. Arguing is different. If he brings up any issues with belongings you can cooly say you know perhaps it's time to sell some things. I have a friend who is interested in buying some belongings and I may take her offer. Be creative and lie. If he reacts and gets angry you can stay calm as it isn't real. You can say, I noticed last visit you seemed to have started that process and I'm thinking you are right and I should be moving ahead with that too. But do not argue. Just make your statement and like a good mother dealing with a small child.......the adult does not negotiate. I'm giving this example not for you to stick to but to give you a perspective of how to take the Lead. OWN your space, your body your mind your Spirit. You will know you done good when he runs. Because that his weakness, his anger. He fears his fathers violence, his hidden anger at his mother, that it will burst out one day and do violence. THAT is why he must always have an escape. He knows what crumbles you so address that. Think of all the times he has crumbled you....what nerve did it strike....your wound? Your fear. If you can tame that or see it coming you can end his power over you. I see this visit as a GOOD thing. Confrontation will serve you not walk over you. You can do this! Expect him to hit you where your weak and visualize your response. Imagine the worst and see yourself handling it. His goal will be to get you so angry you will run. Whatever he hits you with is superficial, remember that. If the house is upside down....fix it. If he leaves little mysteries, ignore them. You can do this. You can actually have fun with it, toying with his comfort zone. Lie with grace, be a woman to be reckoned with....not in an ego way but in a I PROTECT MYSELF WAY. You can do it........I know you really do have a wicked sense of humor ..........it can be the equalizer of all nasty energy. HUMOR! it's your strength....use it! He will run....running is your weakness as well as his.....but now you rise above and end this common thing that binds you two. End it. BLESSINGS!



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