Possible problems in paradise - need input please
been married for over 20 yrs.. never had many problems, things have been going well with a few exceptions of illness but nothing serious. Financially ok - could be better but we get by. nothing that causes us to fight or be unhappy. My sister in law has been distant lately and in review f her facebook page she recently became fb friends with my husband's ex fiancé... they don't and the ex fiancé friend requested my husband. We were both look ing on his facebook and saw the request - he ddnt accept or decline the request. he actually went into her page to see if he recognized any of her fb friends. I don't know what to think or what I should do.. please help tell me what you see ! thanks and many blessings.
TheCaptain last edited by
I'm sure your husband is interested in how the life of someone he was once engaged to has turned out and vice versa - that's just normal curiosity. But he married you and this is your insecurity, nothing to do with him. Have you asked him if he is happy or if he would like to change anything about your relationship? Relationships all need to grow and change in order to survive. Why don't you also talk it out with your sister-in-law to find out why she has been so distant? The biggest mistake humans can make is to assume we know what anyone else is thinking or doing.
Blmoon last edited by
The gut uneasiness you pick up is really about your sister in law. You feel a malice or trouble but not sure what or where. Your gut can be trusted but it's your head that needs to make the choices about this. Your sister in law does have a bee in her bonnet about you but is not honest about it----she's the type that smiles but holds onto imagined slights---there is something you said or did or I'm really hearing a form of jealousy on her part. I get that your man may not be the showiest prince charming but he is very loyal to you and you come first
I pick up an ownership energy in a family member---it may be her---and that they resent your place in his life. Spirit says this slight is all imagined and the person is always imagining slights---a victim state of mind. Your gut feels being "targeted". Do not give her the satisfaction of entertaining scary thoughts. The fact your man has no problem sharing his Facebook with you is a very positive sign. IT'S ironic how intention manifests---the sisterinlaw is Jealous of you and wishes to plant that seed in you! Keep your presence alive on your man's facebook page but do not obsesses and give him due respect and trust if he has earned that. I do not feel he is intending any secrets. Ignore your sisterinlaw---karma takes care of her intentions. Be your best sweet self with her---it will drive her crazy and you will not be drawn down to her level. I feel even if you mentioned her sudden distance and offered an apology it wouldn't change her pattern of inventing slights that do not exist. BLESSINGS!
Thank you both for your answers.
The Captain, your right he might be interested in knowing how her life turned out but we've heard the story from his step mother who happens to be friends with his ex fiancé's mother. Funny thing my husband doesn't like or talk to his step mother. I don't feel that he is unhappy but I have asked and he isn't big on words, he always tells me he loves me and that he is happy. he tells me he loves me everyday and it is probably insecurities on my part. I just cant help but feel that his sister had something to do with her trying to contact him. That I see as a betrayal as she is always at my house, we send her money, and I entertain her when she comes to town. I think its disrespectful and she shouldn't get involved.
Blmoon, you are right on the ownership part. She feels that she is the oldest and has had all the power over them all. When I came into the picture all that changed.. I believe what you say about the bee in the bonnet and I think it may come from something I might have said about their last visit. I wasn't too happy but I think I will take your advise and make myself present on his fb page think Ill post some of our Christmas pictures!
Thanks for you responses. it does ease my mind.
TheCaptain last edited by
It doesn't matter what your sister-in-law plots - if things are right between you and your husband, no one can break up your relationship. But continue to treat her politely - you have to be the better person and not descend to her level.
thank you TheCaptain... I will continue to do that. I just sent her a text hoping that all is well with her and her son.