Question for Captain if you have time please



  • I am having a hard time with my ex still forgfving him. I am just wondering if he is really doing everything he id doing for the boys or if its because his mother is trying to get her control of me and the kids back like I think she is. I just want to know if my ex is really trying to stay clean for the right reasons or if hes going to end up right back in the stuff which will hurt my kids again.



  • Hobbles, your happiness seems to be dependent on other people doing right by you and your kids. But that is unrealistic - some people are always going to behave selfishly or unfairly to you. You have to learn to start enjoying life regardless of how other people behave. Then you will become responsible for and able to create your own happiness, and the people currently causing you grief will lose their importance in the process and drop out of your life.



  • dear captain I never thought about it that way I think you are completely correct in that idea. I try to do right by others so I think others should do the same. Any suggestions on how to let go and enjoy more? I really would like to be a happier person for myself and my kids. :



  • Hobbles, you can stop giving away your power to these people who certainly don't deserve to have any more than anyone else. When you see yourself as their equal ( well, better behaved than them certainly and as powerful as you imagine they are), you will have taken back the control you should always have had. By knowing that they cannot make you happy, that it is up to you, you acknowledge that you are the only possible creator of your own happiness. That way you let go of needing them to treat you well and you can be free of their influence in your life. Only then will you begin to really enjoy living. These people have dominated your life for too long. They aren't that important.



  • Thank you so much for your patience and help with and for me Captain. 🙂 I really do appreciate everything you have done for me. 🙂

    Laci

    Smiley face balloons and bubbles to you.:)



  • Dear Captain,

    I believe you said in another post that things with my court stuff were going to get rude/nasty if I wasn't careful and forgiving... I thought I was being forgiving, but the nastiness is definitely there. Can you possibly say a prayer for me for court Monday? I just want what is best for my children. I love them so much! Thank you! Blessings to you too! 🙂



  • You need to express and release any negativity you feel towards your ex and his family. If you can be alone, scream out how you feel at some photos of them or punch a pillow.



  • Thank you Captain,

    Do you think that will help lessen anxiety for court things...I hope so. I hope all the negativity stops everywhere! 🙂

    Thank you again for all you do! 🙂

    Laci



  • It will allow you to get rid of a lot of negativity that you are carrying around - do the exercise as often as you need to when you feel those feelings of anger and frustration for your ex bubbling up inside. Removal of negativity will definitely result in less anxiety.



  • Thank you Dear Captain,

    Now I will pray for best results for the children on Monday also! 🙂

    Thank you very much!

    Laci