Help with Dream Interpretation Please
What you did for yourself was the same kind of energy of a good. spa---the point is you gave to yourself. I as well returned to unfinished projects and really it is not just us as I read it in a few places that a lot of unfinished business suddenly interrupted that period of moving into the unknown. The last three weeks have been odd, I have not had energy for readings except a few and found myself extra absorbent and picking up too many outside ailments of others but in light of my new diet it makes sense. I'm being forced to exercise other ways of padding a barrier between others. As psychic as I am, I did not pick up on you "making do" without certain comforts! I am guilty of that sometimes--being stingy to myself
because I am a trouper and honestly will spend on others before myself. I am much better about that the last few years.In fact last January I made a vow to make my dream house as a whole and at times have had to stop. So I applaud you----and you did follow your gut. You missed the networking of a getaway BUT you raised the energy of your home and it will attract the right visitors---in fact others who know better would of noticed your stingy streak towards yourself. I see it if I go in someone's house---it stands out. I once had a friend who called me for advice all the time but she never followed it. She complained of not finding a man but really she always felt cheated by life in general. I was shocked to visit her very nice home---beautifully decorated BUT in her bedroom she had no bed!! Her daughters had beds but she had been sleeping on her floor for two years because she just put buying one off or always felt any money had to go somewhere else!!! I told her she really needed to get a bed as it was sending a message to the universe but she agreed and still never did.. Of course it made me look at myself when I got home! I think our shadow side hides from us. Usually when I sense a person is stingy with themselves Spirit will show me worn shoes or holey nightgowns and underwear. I have had to be very frugal RAISING 4 kids but that's long past. Spirit gets in my face now if I am stingy with myself. The thing is even if you are broke but need something spirit will bring it if you visualize it. Like I said though our shadow side will sabotage it if we are not comfortable with our entitlement to abundance. i've felt a lot of old baggage this month and the cards say that it is good!!! I have gotten the message that "this vulnerability stage" precedes very positive change. I felt a shift today so you probably feel it too. And like you I feel a resurgence of the promise to fix lame spots around my home. What I get from Spirit is by Nov of this year I and many others will be full swing busy in a positive way of being in their purpose and it is important to have a home base that will give and nurture us so we can balance our giving to the world. But we still must observe the cycles of the planets so we cant expect to just go go go and all is advancement. So we will feel more push sometimes and other times things will stall. That always brings feelings of doubt. I really feel another shift in high gear is upon us starting today.I have been gloomy too but spirit said it had a good purpose so I expect you have felt the same thing and Fe. will go out much better than it came in! BLESSINGS!
THAT SAYS FEBURARY will go out much better than came in!!!
ps---my cards for today. A Goddess trio!
GODDESS OF STRENGTH (Stand up for what I believe--I will gain respect)
GODDESS OF COMPASSION (Self criticism is diminishing self worth)
GODDESS OF THE UNKNOWN (A new chapter is around the corner--remove fear--embrace the unknown)
HOLY CLARITY! : )
Unfinished business…you got that right…
First of all, the bulk of my week off for some reason was spent trying to buy the new couches. I went to the store on Tuesday with my sister and we were sitting on one couch and looking at fabric swatches for at least 20 minutes – all the while the sales guy was standing 20 feet away from us having a personal conversation with a colleague. When I finally decided that was “the one” I had to get up and go get him to ask him about fabric swatches to take home. He acted irritated – like I was interrupting his conversation and what a pain that was! Then he tells me that one of the swatches I wanted he did not have and if he ordered it for me it would take 8 weeks. So I took two others and left. Once home, I knew I really wanted the other one, BUT needed a swatch to make sure it wouldn’t clash with my area rug. So I went back the next day and said to order the swatch and I would wait. Suddenly, he was able to give me the swatch from the spool in the store if I gave him a credit card (to charge me $25 if I didn’t return it). WHY DIDN’T HE JUST SAY THAT THE DAY BEFORE??? So I took it home, decided it worked great with the rug and emailed him that I wanted to order the couches and would be in the next day with the swatch and to complete the order. So he tries to run my credit card for the FULL amount (not the 25% down) BEFORE I came back into the store. Because of the way he did it, my bank put a freeze on my card and he couldn’t put it through. He left me a voice mail – just as nasty and unhelpful as he had been all week and I left him a message back that I would be in the next day and we would work it out then. When I went in the next day he was helping another customer, but saw me and just walked away from her while she was in mid-sentence. I said, ‘I can wait until you are done helping her” to which he replied “that’s okay, she’s been here for an hour.” As if to say, she’s a pain in the butt (which is how he had treated me all week, but now that he knew I was going to place an order somehow I ranked higher). So this is when I found out how he tried to charge my card for the full amount and that he had tried multiple times (which is why they froze it). I told him that I needed to call my bank on Monday to ensure that none of those attempts had gone through before I would give him another card to pay for the 25% down. He got really ticked off (of course) and said that if I waited until Monday I would miss the sale. The sale went THROUGH Monday so that was a lie. I told him so and he admitted that it was that he would be off on Monday (and therefore afraid he would miss out on the commission). I was STILL trying to get the deal done in spite of HIM and he was STILL being a world class jerk so I said “never mind, I’ll just buy my couches somewhere else.” Then he suddenly was trying to be nice (of course). I asked for a manager’s name that I could speak to on Monday in his absence. I called today and asked for her and she was already gone for the day (of course, he didn’t tell me what hours she would be there or who would be there in the later shift). So I called again and asked for the manager on duty. I was transferred and cut off. I called back AGAIN and once again cut off. So I guess the universe doesn’t want me to buy the dang couches!!! I’m so frustrated. That was the only thing I was actually going to have COMPLETED last week and now not even that is done.
And MORE unfinished business…
Last week an old boyfriend from COLLEGE searched me on LinkedIn. We dated 28 YEARS AGO. I just knew he would be calling me this week. Pulled cards which told me that he was either divorced or going through one. It upset me because when I saw that he had searched for me, I immediately remembered something that happened while we were dating. Bear in mind, this was back when I was 19 and 20. Like most people, when I went off to college, I had a high school boyfriend. He met someone else where he went to college. Everyone I knew had entered Freshman year with a high school sweetheart which ended because they went to different colleges and met someone else. So this guy had a high school girlfriend back home too. One day he asked me to drive him to the mall as he did not have a car. So we go to the mall – only for me to find out that the reason he wanted to go was to buy his girlfriend back home a Valentine’s Day present!!! He actually asked me to go into Victoria’s Secret with him to pick something out!!! So I went to a department store to buy myself some perfume. He came up to the counter, asked what I was doing, I told him, he looks at the perfume I picked out and tells me I can’t buy it because that’s HER perfume. So I told him to go you-know-what and bought the biggest bottle they had. The ridiculous thing is I kept seeing him. He dated me right up until he graduated, got on a plane and flew home to marry her. Anway, it just made me think about what happened last year with the return of the shapeshifter – seeing the pattern of allowing them to treat me like such a piece of garbage – and it made me really sad.
Anyway, as predicted, he called me today at work. Said he had called me the Friday I left for vacation and had just missed me – he was in town last week and wanted to see me. I asked him how his wife would feel about that and he tells me they got divorced in December. He says he will be in town again next week and would like to take me to dinner for my birthday. At least he remembered my birthday, I guess (LOL). Mercury is retrograde so this is the time when old relationships pop up for unfinished business to be healed. He did apologize for being such a jerk to me, but also gave me the tired old line of “I married the wrong one.” Give me a break. He is newly divorced and reaching back to the past for comfort. He won’t be getting any from me!
If the Universe thinks this is funny, I’m not laughing.
OH MY!!!After your first sentence I'm thinking holy mercury retrograde! You hit on some touchy subjects for me and I so was wanting you to kick that salesman to the curb!! I used to get d ick heads when I was younger but I grew to be blessed by the crone and I never give bad salespeople my time. In fact I always find the ANGEL in the store. One who is kind of psychic---knows me well and will even call when he gets something I had no idea I wanted! I have one now at a furniture store and he's always very busy but I will wait or come back. In fact one day I went in and he was gone and a fast talking ego maniac with his corvette parked outside tried getting pushy and I so cut him off and had to push him back with a scary firm tone about four times so I could just browse---he followed me to the door! I hate rude or pushy salespeople. I like my space when looking and a good salesperson will back off but will check in not to be rude---like he'll be busy but yell how you doing and say I am busy but with a happy vibe
and I will wait because he is a pleaser not a money grabber. The good ones know a happy customer will be loyal and come back. If a salesperson scr ews me I will never set foot in that place again. Both your events say the same thing! You need to get your QUEEN Y B itch on! You are right---you are revisiting old important shadows!! I did too and talk about icky. I pick up a love hate vibe for women off of both those men. Passive aggressive. And kinda funny for the salesman as he chose a bad career for that as mostly women do the furniture shopping. I can tell in first 30 seconds if someone is going to help me. If I get resistance I assume the angels have a plan I can't see yet. Either I need to wait or I need to refresh my boundaries as I think we all need that now and then----specially when we are low. Or we are about to enter an important phase that requires us to be sharp with our intuitions and self confident without fear of confrontation. Didn't Lee pick up on that? It echoes the same energy call that you were ambivalent about when you bent all those noses at work. This is the same path. I had to set a boundary last week that really s ucked! I so wanted to fix it but sometimes the fix is not nice!! I had to put all feelings aside when the feelings were dominate. This is my shadow side---strangers I can handle but loved ones? And I felt the same way---REALLY God? One more time? But I get it---and I know this loved one will do better--painfully so---with tough boundaries rather than kind nurture and will respect me in the future. So the bottom line is RESPECT. Both your events as well evolved around a lack of respect. You know Watergirl I love talking to you because so many folks think that life is about learning and all is fixed when really it is about awareness and even psychics must manage our shadow sides and no it's not like a game we win and all is good. It's awareness and choices and the art of detachment when called for. Having faith in hard choices even when it feels awful. The right thing to do in a challenge is rarely the easiest!! BLESSINGS!
BIG PS! Speaking of shark salesmen. Do you ever intervene for others? Mostly I am a mind your own business person having grown up on the Southside of Chicago but sometimes spirit will force me to aid a stranger. I was in our favorite music store with my mate last week and usually all the salespeople are layed back and respectful but there was this new guy who zerod in a a woman and I could feel her distress! At first I moved but spirit kept talking and pushing me to stay near her. I felt humanly embarressed cos I had to pretend I was looking at stuff! Then I just acted like I was waiting on my mate. This sweet woman I could sense her kind big heart---was going to surprise her son with a guitar but she knew nothing about guitars. This salesman was pushing for a big sale and I could see every step and his finish----I heard him tell her stuff that was not true. I kept waiting for him to leave for a minute so I could tell this woman the best deal in town was a combo I just bought but it was at another store but if she told this store they would match and take an extra ten percent off. My husband kept looking my way as if thinking there she goes shes going to speak out. I could feel the sales guy pressure harder and the woman kept saying oh my how much is all this going to cost I had no idea. Finally as the guy picked up the best guitar I knew was for her son I blurted out---oh thats a perfect choice---I just spent days researching guitars for my granddaughter who is still a beginner and did you know this store will match and discount ten percent on any other offers ---isnt that right I said to the salesman. He was not happy and I could feel his anger at me. I quikly told her to look up the other store and they had the whole bundle---everything her son needed ---a five hundred dollar savings at least. The salesman hurriedly directed her to the other end of the store saying heres what you want. My mate collected me and we went into the other part of the store. My mate says I knew you were going to do that! I felt embarrassed but said I can't help it---he was a shark! By then I was questioning myself although I felt it was spirits pushing me. But she stayed with him so I scolded myself and said why can't I MYOB! Well half hour later that woman comes to me before she goes out the door and says oh thank you thank you I am so glad you are still here----I thought I would never get away from that man! Please tell me that info again---he had my head spinning and I could barely think. So I gave her the info and she left. And she couldn't thank me enough and said she was so grateful I spoke up even though she could tell I felt uncomfortable! Does Spirit call on you like that?
Yes, I have intervened for others in the past - not so much recently. And, it has never really felt like Spirit pushing me to do so although it could have been. I tend to have a laser sharpness for things and have never been shy about speaking up. I never thought of my sharp "sight" as psychic awareness, but maybe it was/is. And if I feel the other person is too meek and getting a raw deal or pushed around I will roar on their behalf. What's funny is that this issue of SPEAKING UP has indeed been about me finding my Queen Bi chiness, however in the past that was usually something that came out too much and I needed to tame. So it is confusing me. Where is the middle ground? With the icky furniture guy I was trying to be calm and patient because I really wanted to get the sale complete and be able to cross something off my list last week! My sister actually thought that he had been helpful the first day and I said "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?" He did point something out to us we had not thought of, but he said it with such a mocking attitude - like we were such stupid women - that it erased any helpfulness that was there. With the college boyfriend, my feelings for him have long since gone so it was easy for me to point out to him calmly how he had mistreated me. It was funny - he was talking to me about his daughter doesn't take any crap from boys and he is so proud of her...told me a story about him going on her first date and what had happened. I just waited and when he was done said, "Hmmm, does that make you feel bad at all for the way you treated me?" He said yes and then "I'm sorry" and it sounded sincere, but who knows? Honestly, I really don't care. Like I said, any feelings for him are long gone. The emotion that came us was me wanting to go back in time and give myself a hug in that mall! And also sad that I had allowed these things to go on. But I did notice the pattern between him and the one that came after - the awareness you spoke of.
And today things went from worse to worse-er (LOL) at work. They changed our goals and bonus plan - making it virtually impossible to make any bonus. The goals are quarterly, but now if you don't make your goal in a quarter, whatever amount you were short gets added to the next quarter. So basically, once you miss a quarter you get yourself into a hole you will never get out of because the goals are sooooo difficult to reach in the first place. But if you do make it up in the next quarter, you don't get the bonus for it. Our salaries are riduculously low because they rationalize that we have this "bonus" opportunity - so for me it is just a way to say we are holding back 50% of your salary until you prove you are worthy of it. Every year the goals go up by a huge percentage. I am the only one that made it last year for 3 of the 4 quarters and it was extremely difficult and took some miracles for it to happen. I will speak up about it tomorrow as we will be having one-on-one meetings with her. She of course will tell me I have a bad attitude but i really don't care.
Good changes with positions and territories are occuring for three other people at work and yet I am still stuck and feeling like Sisyphus. I thought there was a good change for me coming this year and yet it is happening all around me, just not for me. I'm at a loss as to what is going on for me in this situation. If it's just confirmation that I need to get out of there, then where are the opportunities to do so??? At least the furniture and ex-boyfriend thing was clear.
Calgon, take me away!!!!
Are you getting the feeling you should have walked out awhile ago? I did see it as already carved in stone and eventually the insult of pushing that hope boulder up a hill would take its tole. They are actually punishing you for having the RIGHT attitude. You should be proud they find you iffy for their owning. They prefer folks very desperate to keep a job. When you explained the new pay system Spirit showed me a plantation! Workers picking cotton----collecting their few coins and still owing the boss man! Funny but not! The company sees everyone as disposable and they use them up. Remember the dream----a good company is run by folks who want EVERYONE to succeed. You need a job yes---but by staying in THAT energy you can not attract your dream. It's the law of INTENTION. You declare what your boundries are----take action and then it is real. Be brave! I think you know what you must do and it will not be easy to close one door ---alone in the unknown trusting a better door manifesting. Do the hard thing
it's what the universe is asking of all of us right now. BLESSINGS!
You described the company and their management style perfectly! I often "coach" my co-workers into seeing that the desperation is where they want you. I try to lead by example but they are all still so afraid of speaking up or standing up for themselves. Oddly, the Cruella VP has reached a place of some sort of respect for me. I would like to think it's because i don't allow her to scare me and I do speak up, but I know her - it's just because I made my goal last year. That 4th quarter I only missed by a few percentage points and even she has admitted that it was a raw deal.
She praised me yesterday in our meeting prior to rolling out the new plan. Using me as the benchmark for others in a way. I ignored it. Today at our one-on-one she praised me again and I realized that the new "plan" was because she was ticked off that one of the 4th quarter bonus checks she had to sign was for someone that was not really checked in all year. She was pregnant and focused on that, then on maternity leave, then once back still focused on motherhood, then focused on selling her house, then focused on buying the new house and renovating it. She made the 4th quarter by sheer luck and the gifts of all my work (the last territory change gifted her with the territory I had been working on all year). So after the praise, I said thank you, but then said something to the effect of....
I know your mind is already made up and what I say will not sway you at this point, but I personally have a problem with the leadership in this company not speaking up when something needs to be addressed so in the interest of not being a hypocrite I am gonig to tell you my feelings about our meeting yesterday. I understand what you are trying to achieve and why, but I think there is a very real possibility of it backfiring in a way that you may not have thought of. Are you familiary with Greek Mythology? (the answer was no) There is a story of a man named Sisyphus who was condemned by the Gods to repeat a task for all eternity. His task was to push a large boulder up a mountain until he reached the top. Once the peak was reached, however, the boulder fell down the mountain and Sisyphus would have to walk down, push it up again, it would fall, and over and over. It is a story of futility and hopelessness. In your new plan, the goal is basically being changed from quarterly to an annual goal. However the payout is still quarterly. So if I someone misses a quarter - and the shortage is added to the following quarter - it has the potential to keep snowballing as our goals are not easy to reach in the first place. Additionally, if the shortage is somehow made up in the next quarter, the bonus will not be paid on it which is like you want to have your cake and eat it too. So the goals which are intended as an "incentive" plan to motivate us will actually do the exact opposite and demotivate us as the load will seem impossible to bear and the hole too deep to dig ourselves out of. In that case, a person will just give up. So it's counter-productive to what your intent is or should be.
Basically, she told me to just keep doing what I have been doing and I shouldn't have to worry.
I do feel pleased with how I handled myself and how I presented my thoughts to her. Maybe that was the test in this for me. I didn't fly off the handle yesterday and was very calm, professional and articulate today. I expected her to get very angry with me (that's what she does when you disagree with her or have the audacity to have your own opinion instead of being a Stepford Wife), but she didn't get angry at all today.
I know I am supposed to leave - or at least I think that's what I am supposed to do. BUT, I did leave my last job before I had another and had to live off my savings for 15 months. So I will not do that this time. The new job needs to come first. There is a big part of me that is tired of being in these types of work situations and I don't just want "another" job - i want a job that is RIGHT for me. This is why I have said that I need it to somehow come TO me so I know the synchronicity is there.
Anyway, at least for now the drama of the "new" bonus plan being rolled out is over or at least on it's way to be. There is still some aftermath going on....
Holy BOULDERS! Am I psychic or what?! That's too funny. The way you talked to your boss---THAT is exactly how I always spoke up at work. And sometimes they embraced the truth and changed but other times they knew dam well what they were doing and didn't care.. It's just business. I got sick of being part of just business. I want a more mind body spirit based organization. My boss started out with that dream but as she grew it became empty rhetoric. You mentioned that extra niceness but not feeling it
that's what I got before I left my job. Gifts started feeling icky and I felt an extra something was about to be asked of me. I even started saying out loud after she gave me a little gift.....oh oh should I be worried? I still see a positive opportunity for you very soon. You will be fine. BLESSINGS!
One of the changes for other people I spoke of involved one of the girls in our office moving her desk to our sister property as she will be selling both. So Cruella has given me her cubicle as it is bigger and a little more private.
I have been rewarded with a larger prison cell.
Put pictures of your boss on your desk----that would really scr ew with her--hahaha.. Really though you should make those vision boards that spiritual help books are always suggesting. You know. pasting a colage of dream images. All you hope for!
That's so funny because I was thinking about it yesterday and thought oh good Lord, THIS isn't your answer to my prayers is it? I have been asking for something new - a change - and part of what I focused on was my environment because I can't stand my cramped cubicle and office environment. But I was focusing on something completely NEW. This couldn't be the Universe's answer to my prayers!!! If so, it's another sick joke!
And the college boyfriend is STILL asking me to get together for dinner this week. I really thought after our conversation last week he would disappear as I was not very welcoming and forced him to look at how he had treated me. Is he just a glutton for punishment? I really don't want to see him. But I did tell him I forgave him because I wanted to just let it go and I thought maybe he might be resurfacing for forgiveness. How do I tell him to hit the bricks without sounding vindictive or hurring his feelings? The thought of sitting across a table from him trying to act like old friends when all i can remember is how I allowed him to mistreat me sounds like a miserable evening.
It seems you have the "coyote trickster" following you around as well. I get that a lot! Yep, I often feel part of a private joke. You know what your new office is---a selfish gesture. In light of you revealing you ain't so dumb, blind , dumb and desperate as they like, the person that needs you most threw you a bone. My own boss did that one. We had a teacher who had great management skills as well as a great teacher. She was young and left to marry, give birth but needed money and came back at first on a limited scheduled. She was up front honest about her time but my boss so promised to respect that. Yet I watched my boss pull her in more and more. Every inch she gave was after some reward, a fancy title etc. One day I run into this poor overworked new momma and as I suspected she was miserable! And felt overwhelmed but felt she could not disappoint after all that niceness and praise. I met with the boss and told her straight up that to be careful squeezing so much out of her because I saw her eventually breaking down and leaving. Her answer to me was to find ways of helping lighten her load..... and her efforts were just superficial. Just when that poor woman was going to quit my boss surprised her with a big beautiful office!!! I left after that because the same thing was happening to me, I felt the weight on my back growing and my boss acting sincere with offers of how can I help but it was just superficial and she was always praising me and in the early years it felt real but changed. After I left she sent me a card three months later with a hundred dollar gift card and said the place was not the same without me! I thanked her and spent it with no guilt.What I said to you about the dream board was not just joking---Spirit did show me that. I'm thinking in light of what you said about a wish perhaps it is TOO ambiguous and you do need to be more detailed and specific and bal lsy to ask for the moon! And I had a VERY disturbing dream last night that says I should do the same! I thought hmmm what images would go on my vision board? Of course I first thought of Oprah. Anyway I lost focus on the subject and did chores. Last night I dreamed I'm in a big auditorium but backstage---Oprah is on stage and she's giving away stuff and the women are loving it and I;m wondering why am I backstage? I want some stuff! Next scene Oprah invites me to sit by her and I am confused and wondering why---the moment I had self doubt Oprah turned away and the crowds of woman kind of rushed the stage and I find myself stuck in A group of ladies trying to sell me junk I do not want and I'm thinking why am I not getting nice free stuff instead of these pushy women trying to sell me stuff. The one bold item was a huge white lawn mower (a white lie?) remember how as a kid you were told a lie for a good reason was a white lie? Anyway I am so aware in my dream this is weird.......I'm aware I am dreaming. I just kept saying why would I want a big white lawn mower? I've been thinking of it all day! Full moon howl anyone? BLESSINGS!
Hahaha! Well, it wasn't THAT vague...
All last year I was focused on a promotion as I felt it coming on under the surface. My boss was using me as his #2 even though someone there already had that title. But he didn't lean on her because she really wasn't capable of it. However, I didn't want to get a promotion by trying to push her out and I didn't see any other way for it to happen. Close to the end of the year I really just wanted out of there completely. I also started to daydream a bit about working out of my house. There are people who sell/represent a hotel and work out of their home so it's not impossible. Problem is I want the best of both worlds - the opportunity to work out of the house when I feel like it and go in to an office when I feel too isolated and need to be around people. So I have been saying I want another job with that promotion I wanted all last year OR more freedom in the current position I have which would translate into the two offices - one at home and an actual one. The actual one would be REAL office, not just a cubicle with a supportive boss and people I enjoyed working with. That is what I have been praying for.
Lee gave me the following:
I will manifest the most wonderful job opportunity, working for an employer who is fair and non-abusive, alongside wonderful people, enjoying my work, in a very nice office that is easy to go to; so that I have the experience of enjoying my work, but it doesn't exhaust me and I get to focus on my personal life and what I want to experience and feel alongside it.
In 2014 i will be happier in my career than I have been before.
In 2014 I will move into a level of happiness that I have not known.
I trust the POSSIBILITY of a better job.
I guess it's that fine line of being too specific and limiting yourself and being too vague. Not sure where that fine line is at this point if this new cubicle is the answer to my prayers.
WHITE LAWN MOWER??? Wow, that's a doozy. White is purity to me, but no idea what a lawn mower would represent. The Oprah thing is funny. Sounds a little bit like worthiness. Did you feel unworthy at all, like everyone else deserved the gifts but not you?
yes! And I knew it was wrong! But I had on my mind that issue because in two weeks I did pull good cards along with the self worth card. I shared that first with you a few posts ago but then the other day I pulled two positive cards but also the undervaluing my self worth card. I do take notice when I get a card like that. I think reading YOUR posts added to it because we are dealing with similar desires and I think the way your bosses think brought back memories of issues before quitting my job. I think that despite my boss buttering me up I wasn't buying it---that white lie--a huge lawn mower just meant MORE WORK! AND BOY, Lee said it PERFECTLY!! That is as clear as it gets!
Yes! More work is on its way and I do "see" the buttering up going on as there is a slight sense of desperation beneath the surface on her part. Along with everything else that is going on, Cruella's person in charge at our property - whom I really llike and is the only reason things were bearable last year - will be having surgery at the end of March and will be out for 6 weeks. There is also another department head who is likely leaving soon and when she does all sh*t will hit the fan as her team is weak and they are a main operating dept that supports ours. I have already been compensating too much for her people not carrying their weight. Although she is burned out and doesn't have the energy any longer to train or encourage her people to be better, she still is the glue that is holding it together right now. It will get worse - much worse - before it gets better. They just don't have enough people and on top of that they don't give her the money to attract good people so it is a double whammy. I am looking ahead to both of them being gone and dreading it.
I managed to escape seeing the college boyfriend without having to confront the issue head on. Hopefully he will not reappear but I have a feeling the Universe is going to force me to have the confrontation. I would really rather he just went away!
So this weekend I have been thinking about what will be happening in my life the next 3 to 6 months. Wondering if the new career opportunity for me was just about these upcoming changes/challenges at work. Is the lesson to be happy in the present moment? I'm tired of lookng to the future for something better to happen/come along and it never does. So it seems that maybe this is the answer...surrendering to and living in the present moment. Or is that just a cop out? Not sure.
How have things been for you the past week?
Mercury ceases its retrograde phase on Friday. I try not to put too much emphasis on these things, but this one really was a doozy!
surrender? I keep "bumping" into that concept! Only, from a different perspective. Not only did I hear it intuitively but then the subject kept falling in my lap by way of books, emails etc....AND even your post! Isn't that how it works when you ask Spirit to elaborate? Mostly, surrender has meant retreat, abide, be still but now I'm hearing another aspect of surrender is just plain not expecting change for some situations but not necessarily lying down. Surrender also means knowing what can't be changed and preparing or making room for it.....a different approach that does not change others but gets you through. It's more of being prepared to get through rather than push or try to make something into something it is not. Mostly, we analyze a situation to death trying to make sense or change but truth is some situations will not change. Surrender can be that survival instance where you focus on yourself. Instead of making yourself crazy butting heads with how things could be better or butting heads with lack of insight of others to not see what you know would fix the situation you sometimes must preserve your energy and move towards the real change outside you somewhere else and just concentrate on YOU. For example, I can get stuck on the notion that I can see exactly when and why my mates illness will come out. I get frustrated and in reality find myself arm out trying to hold back a train. Surrender is accepting that it is what it is....the nature of the illness will surface and my energy should just have a plan and deal with it. IT IS WHAT IT IS. I really thought I get that as I DO live by that. But just when you think you are doing perfectly well ......there is always room for improvement. So yes it is in the air and you sniffed it out. A actively defensive aspect of surrender. More SELFISH. Remember that be more constructively SELFISH phase awhile back? Well, chapter two! And yes I'm feeling much better energy wise. Everyone should be if they followed the intuition to rest the last few weeks and lay low despite all the blasts from the past. No doubt you have had SURRENDER gems fall in your lap as well! March will bring back your positive dream cape again...will open the windows. BLESSINGS!
I was without my computer for a few days as I needed to get a new router...Mercury Retro isn't over yet
That is so funny because I have actually been mulling over that exact phrase...IT IS WHAT IT IS! I used to say it a lot but people always reacted saying it was negative or being in "victim" mode. But I don't agree. I think it's negative and victim - or not - depending on the circumstances. If a person is unemployed, yet lying on the couch all day and not actively looking for a job and blaming their unemployment on the economy, blah blah blah and IT IS WHAT IT IS, then it is a victim statement. But, as you said, if it is about a situation completely out of your control, then it is healthy. The weather for instance. Someone last week who lives on the east coast was talking about the weather there and that yes, they were all tired of the freezing cold and snow and would like winter to be over, but IT IS WHAT IT IS. In her case, it was a form of acceptance/surrender.
However, I'm still not sure which situation I am in with regard to my work. Is surrender a form of giving up and being a victim or acceptance? I know I deserve better than this. BUT I also am not certain which way to go from here. So I am still looking for the Universe to light the way by either something coming TO me or the path to be in neon flashing lights.
Things still seem to be getting better for everyone around me at work - some at lightning speed. I do not begrudge them their happiness and success, just curious why I seem to be left out of the mix. I would like a person-to-person call with God or my Guide(s) or anyone/thing that could help me answer this question.
I felt more and more isolated as well in the months before leaving my job. AND I saw people who had not earned positions suddenly get them which really bothered me but later I saw those people get snared beyond their TITLE into doing more than they wanted to do and realised the owner was baiting their egos. I do not see your situation as negative. It is what it is.....that is not your dream job. You do not belong there. surrender TO THAT. There is no position there that would make you happy because the business as a whole is not YOU. You are just very CAPABLE and you work hard because that is your character. You are not supposed to feel good about that place. If others seem to be moving up or getting some kind of satisfaction it has no reflection on you. So, your surrender is to survive without compromising yourself. Can you be yourself and stay there until your next job? The people who get ahead there have compromised something. If you wasted your time looking deeper and getting closer to others you would see it. The energy will shift by Monday. You will have an opportunity open up for you just as predicted..........this going nowhere feeling is in the planets....it is passing. Don't worry about knowing when to leave....it's being guided.....even if you stall or drag your feat....an event will happen and you will leave. Surrender to wanting a paycheck knowing their will be little personal gratification along with that paycheck. This is whats missing....your job is just a job. It will never be any more then that. You can not tie a bow on that trd. Do not even waste energy lamenting on how things run there. It is what it is. A job with no soul. BLESSINGS!