LibraLuli I need your advice pls thank you



  • Dear LibraLuli

    I read your thread and advice about Libra yeh you got it alright . If I have all the chance to win his back I will have all the passion to do it but as I observed the always wanted to have space and not to pushed them to much other wise you will pushed them away. And yeh they can be charming the way they approach people he hardly talk but yes always make sense I had no trouble to be with him but yes not necessary you get his attention he was inlove to you. I'm still confused in where I am now what relationship do I stand now. We had no lies to each other but I guess I'm stressing him out for being too much available and asking more time to be with him. We never once having misunderstanding if I acting like worried to much that's the way he will giving me excuses his too busy and he thinks we need to stop seeing each other. I know this guy since last year we hardly talk and I just ignore him if we had chance to talk we can laughed together I nearly get melt the way he stares at me and I usually tell him don't do that to me cos I'm getting conscious and feel uncomfortable. I don't like him the first time we met cos he snob me when I said to him that he looks like my friend and telling him that I had a crush on him and I used to date him but his only stay for a visit so nothing happen. I'm just being friendly but I never ever expected that we will get along we used to see each other but his still acting strange but our conversation is cool though his being aloof to me. I was out of touch for more than 9 to 10 mos. cos I wasn't able to be on the place we used to catch up cos a friend of mine who hang out in that area already move to another state I had no passion to visit the place. Till we meet again and he never stop keep in touch with me always giving me credit and asking me to stay longer and keep him company but nothing's personal to me. Until I opened my situation and get along too closed to share each other experiences. His giving me courage and strength to bring back my confidence cos I was with my mentally abusive and manipulative relationship. I just realized I was fond to him I hear his story and he listened to my advices his truly a good person but his alway limited when it comes to physically needs. He said to me that his happy to be with me and he love the way we share personal things and he truly love the way we pleasure each other. I said to me that he adore me to have my own personally and if I pushed him to much that is in a good way but I over do things till he call things off to us. It sad cos I know he doesn't want to hurt me be I insisted him to voice it out to me I just want to hear who I am to him. I shouldn't get mad on what I heard but I am truly not satisfied to his answer. I over reacted and call him dog. He gets mad at me telling me he wasn't intention to hurt me and he never once abusive anyone in his life he never thought I will be expecting more and official relationship. He can't stand me being stress and affected if my past still talking things against me. I now realized he said to me. Don't be stress so I won't upset him. His giving me confusing signal that's why I force him to tell me who I am to him. There are times that I teasing him that he might be in a relationship cos I accidentally see his profile on FB but I do believe on his action and words that was ages and he hardly open it and most of the girli is just nosey Parker. He said to me the his just there for me and will never be away. We can keep each other company and things will never be change as long as we still happy. I have no regret and I'm being me and nothing to hide when I'm with him we can talk anything under the sun I listened to his frustration at work and giving him advice before we fell a part he open up the his having anxiety that's the way he don't need a person who will give him stress and being pushed in other way is not good. We settle things and we both calm and no bad blood but he truly a gentleman never entertain any fight I wish to win him but I was told that he never want relationship to me. He giving me note that I'm the only person talk and intimately involve after his ex 3 yrs a go in his words and action to me I believe in him but its not good enough to stay for me in that situation I will only felt bad and loosing myself confident till I lied that I decided to sea change and get out of bad experience he wishes me well and it's good for me . That's the way it's was just nothing but pleasuring each other company. I couldn't blame him cos his never been promise anything to me and never disrespected me. I only worried cos he always stated to me that he used to be alone and do his own thing and I know his not happy and I always said to him never dream off to be alone its not a happy ending to him cos we both wanted to have our own family and have kids.. I think I ruined myself cos I'm lack of patience and that's he really need aside of boost his ego and giving him compliments which he really deserved it. The only thing I will keep is our memorized and his SMS makes me happy I know his genuine to me something things never happened the way we wanted and I need to accepted that. I'm happily to have him in my life no regrets..



  • Hi Annielan,

    I can tell you right out, and I don't mean to be blunt, but Libra men really despise needy, clingy, dependent women. I feel you are driving him away with this behavior. Libra men need to be cared for, appreciated and pampered at times. They don't like conflict and so it feels like your Libra man might be trying to smooth things over by telling you what you want to here, but you are reading mixed signals because he is also trying to distance himself.

    I would council you to try to do some work on yourself and resolving whatever is in your past that makes you so insecure. This is something that will present itself in all your relationships if it isn't resolved. If you are afraid of abandonment or rejection you need to figure out why and quit expecting your bf to fix those things for you. A Libra man wants harmony and balance with no conflict, no arguing, no accusations. He needs peaceful surroundings and needs to feel secure in the fact that every time he talks to you or sees you he won't be attacked or accused of something. I feel he is trying to not hurt you but is trying to stay away from you at the same time because of the stress it causes. Calm down, forcing a relationship to work, never works. Stay busy, find things to do.....if he is meant to be with you, it will happen. Work on what makes you so insecure.....journal your thoughts.

    Hugs,

    LibraLu



  • I have no intention to go back in any of my past at this moment. I done a lot to work things out I do admit that I always put my all and being honesty to my feelings makes them scared . I may me look like needy or clingy but the past that I had doesn't give me any kind of words or action to justified that I was acted like that I was being ignore and not treated fairly on my past the patience that I have was totally gone and suck my all and I'm not perfect but and I don't want regret everything I do into life but this guy never appreciated me. It sounded pathetic here but he doesn't give any respect in any case I needed that I have no argue or exchanging words to anyone I used to be with but this guy is totally drive me crazy he used my vulnerabilities and being aggressive when he see something that he missing out in his life. I embrace everything and to him but I'm still not good enough but a piece of shit. We're too different people I will not retaliate everything but I'm glad to put an end with him. I hope he find the right person and be happy in his in his life. About this Libra guy I was just confused and now you giving me a hint not to turn my back again and resolve to go back on my own ground I do admitted to work things out for myself and there's no but or what if to me now cos I needed to decided if they doesn't give any reassurance of interested to give what I wanted it wouldn't worry me to past them by I always show my loyalty and I do over do it . Until they get bored and simply not taken me for who I am while I'm always willing to hear their side. I had no complained to Libra he very gentlemen and if I scared him for I care about him. I'm not good enough to him. I felt the same if his controlling his emotion over the situation I gave him a space it's just not gonna work out cos being honest to each other is good but seeing myself doing the first move. Giving me a lot of confusion if did the first move his willing to participate and feeling both us. His not my guy he is not always sure what to decide its been long enough. I wouldn't be intimate to anyone If I had no feelings and I'm not being to confident but I for sure feel that he do likes me he actually never use the word like to me he always use love.I go back the way we started he showing me how make him feel better and he always giving gratitude and no matter what I asked for a favor he always giving me everything even its a small thing if he couldn't find it he will buy me anything no matter what I refused him. He is just not prepare and make him feel bad to stressing myself and pushing him to tell me who I am to him I don't wanna be used and he don't meant to did that to me I'm so sure we are both calm and end up clear. I'm not insecure to libra it's just worry me cos he complained on his life style I only give him advice which he never stop doing things with his friends but he had no rest and abusing his self . There are times he couldn't sleep properly then his telling me that he was stress at work. I spoke to him calmly and we had no argue never once stopping me cos I stated clearly to him he need a break his self relax one day and doing nothing but to eat and sleep. It's a both pressure to us the more I ask him to relax cos I see him struggling he will doing it and telling me who will did this only me. When he will leave me in bed telling me his so envious cos I got more time to sleep rather than him but his extra curricular activities to his friends is too much. I have nothing against to any of his friend or no jealousy I trusted him its just not right when we both not balance to what is the priority. I'm Aquarius and I love my own space too. He is not ready to take responsibility and as I can see his the one not trusting me insecurity I have nothing to anyone nor jealous the issue on my past is he lied to me and hiding his true intention. To libra I had no single insecurity cos I can be who I am not afraid to communicate and open up everything cos we both willing to compromise its just make him scared if I asked him were I stand and I'm not gonna wait till he realized that he is busy to his extra activities and even his work will get affected plus dealing his family member which I stated to him to be in touch and stop holding bad feelings he did listening cos he find away to reach them all I didn't not telling him that his friends is not always be there for him and no one gonna wait for him till he learnt to take responsibly if his excuses to me he doesn't wanna get hurt and he learnt to be along but he love to keep me. I won't bothered cos if I allow myself not being responsibly in what we did and listening to his everything what will gonna happen to us. He always wanted me to decide in everything we do that is kinda alarming to me what if I get pregnant he will just let me to decide everything and his not happy to take his responsibility. That's a big no to me. He simple not sure what he wanted yes his good and nothing more to ask for but don't touch anyone's feeling when your not sure and to be intimate and telling some words and showing some action love and affection is on and off not what I really wanted. We just not in to each other this time and I'm not hoping for anything more I had no regret and I had a great time the respect that I always wanted is indeed but being undecided to take his responsibility and what he really wanted and suddenly realized it wasn't me after more than a year thank you libra guy good riddance... I appreciated your advised but I'm really sorry I'm not insecure and I will admitted if I pushed him to much but I just needed an answer before something me comes up and his still undecided or me always wanted to decide for him. I wish he find someone cos he deserve to be happy and I know how much he wanted to have his kids like I do. We both not young I'm old lee than him ages gap is 7 yrs and 8 months were in the proper ages to settle down. I'm not rushing but I didn't see an assurance of forever love to him.



  • I have no intention to go back in any of my past at this moment. I done a lot to work things out I do admit that I always put my all and being honesty to my feelings makes them scared . I may me look like needy or clingy but the past that I had doesn't give me any kind of words or action to justified that I was acted like that I was being ignore and not treated fairly on my past the patience that I have was totally gone and suck my all and I'm not perfect but and I don't want regret everything I do into life but this guy never appreciated me. It sounded pathetic here but he doesn't give any respect in any case I needed that I have no argue or exchanging words to anyone I used to be with but this guy is totally drive me crazy he used my vulnerabilities and being aggressive when he see something that he missing out in his life. I embrace everything and to him but I'm still not good enough but a piece of shit. We're too different people I will not retaliate everything but I'm glad to put an end with him. I hope he find the right person and be happy in his in his life. About this Libra guy I was just confused and now you giving me a hint not to turn my back again and resolve to go back on my own ground I do admitted to work things out for myself and there's no but or what if to me now cos I needed to decided if they doesn't give any reassurance of interested to give what I wanted it wouldn't worry me to past them by I always show my loyalty and I do over do it . Until they get bored and simply not taken me for who I am while I'm always willing to hear their side. I had no complained to Libra he very gentlemen and if I scared him for I care about him. I'm not good enough to him. I felt the same if his controlling his emotion over the situation I gave him a space it's just not gonna work out cos being honest to each other is good but seeing myself doing the first move. Giving me a lot of confusion if did the first move his willing to participate and feeling both us. His not my guy he is not always sure what to decide its been long enough. I wouldn't be intimate to anyone If I had no feelings and I'm not being to confident but I for sure feel that he do likes me he actually never use the word like to me he always use love.I go back the way we started he showing me how make him feel better and he always giving gratitude and no matter what I asked for a favor he always giving me everything even its a small thing if he couldn't find it he will buy me anything no matter what I refused him. He is just not prepare and make him feel bad to stressing myself and pushing him to tell me who I am to him I don't wanna be used and he don't meant to did that to me I'm so sure we are both calm and end up clear. I'm not insecure to libra it's just worry me cos he complained on his life style I only give him advice which he never stop doing things with his friends but he had no rest and abusing his self . There are times he couldn't sleep properly then his telling me that he was stress at work. I spoke to him calmly and we had no argue never once stopping me cos I stated clearly to him he need a break his self relax one day and doing nothing but to eat and sleep. It's a both pressure to us the more I ask him to relax cos I see him struggling he will doing it and telling me who will did this only me. When he will leave me in bed telling me his so envious cos I got more time to sleep rather than him but his extra curricular activities to his friends is too much. I have nothing against to any of his friend or no jealousy I trusted him its just not right when we both not balance to what is the priority. I'm Aquarius and I love my own space too. He is not ready to take responsibility and as I can see his the one not trusting me insecurity I have nothing to anyone nor jealous the issue on my past is he lied to me and hiding his true intention. To libra I had no single insecurity cos I can be who I am not afraid to communicate and open up everything cos we both willing to compromise its just make him scared if I asked him were I stand and I'm not gonna wait till he realized that he is busy to his extra activities and even his work will get affected plus dealing his family member which I stated to him to be in touch and stop holding bad feelings he did listening cos he find away to reach them all I didn't not telling him that his friends is not always be there for him and no one gonna wait for him till he learnt to take responsibly if his excuses to me he doesn't wanna get hurt and he learnt to be along but he love to keep me. I won't bothered cos if I allow myself not being responsibly in what we did and listening to his everything what will gonna happen to us. He always wanted me to decide in everything we do that is kinda alarming to me what if I get pregnant he will just let me to decide everything and his not happy to take his responsibility. That's a big no to me. He simple not sure what he wanted yes his good and nothing more to ask for but don't touch anyone's feeling when your not sure and to be intimate and telling some words and showing some action love and affection is on and off not what I really wanted. We just not in to each other this time and I'm not hoping for anything more I had no regret and I had a great time the respect that I always wanted is indeed but being undecided to take his responsibility and what he really wanted and suddenly realized it wasn't me after more than a year thank you libra guy good riddance... I appreciated your advised but I'm really sorry I'm not insecure and I will admitted if I pushed him to much but I just needed an answer before something me comes up and his still undecided or me always wanted to decide for him. I wish he find someone cos he deserve to be happy and I know how much he wanted to have his kids like I do. We both not young I'm old lee than him ages gap is 7 yrs and 8 months were in the proper ages to settle down. I'm not rushing but I didn't see an assurance of forever love to him.



  • It doesn't really sound like he is ready for a serious relationship. You especially need to be careful about being with men who don't show you respect....that is a big red flag. He is showing you who he is and you cannot ignore it. I have made this mistake so many times, they are who they are showing you they are and you cannot expect them to change. What you see is what you get. Please don't think there won't be anyone else if you walk away. You are young and there will be plenty. Always believe that you deserve to be treated with respect and never talked down to.....do not have low expectations in a relationship because that is all you will get then!!! Keep your standards high and men will see this and appreciate it and respect you more. He is telling you he is not ready....listen to him.



  • Thanks you so much Libra doesn't do anything wrong he is very careful when it comes to his action and words to me his not just ready and he never hide anything to me. We both liable we both allowed this all the good things its not late to to cut this all. He didn't intend to hurt me more I recall everything the more I see we both liable in our words and action I might confused him in some other words or action till I realized that I wouldn't never go back to settle myself shorty or cut my pride when I see nothing more to keep from both of us. I only thing I wanted now is to forget the old me and my wrong habit or doing to analyzed my opposite relationship is a two way thing give and take and sometimes if you give to much that's the way they take everything until we find ourselves lost and helpless. I just didn't get it all I'm being blinded and one sided I'm glad he never take advantages of the situation it's not him. And yes I shouldn't get scared of any rejection and needed to accept that anything I do or no matter what I show my best we can please anyone cos I always in that situation if I don't feel and see any potential who wanted me. I will not allow him wasting his time for nothing and if he pushed too much I get mad and feel irritated. Sometimes things we prevent to happen can't stop as easy as that or we never realized we're in the situation we don't wanted be we already there and struggling to get out . I'm glad that he is the one I was being silly to not to get the real score he never ever take advantage of anything he is just being him and I do my mistake I admitted that I gave him wrong signal just like I do and it's not fair if I develop something is not right when I know his not ready and did stated any promise to me. I hope we can talk some other time cos I know his not gonna be at peace if he thinks that he hurt me badly just like I stated I was exaggerated things when finally realized what's is not fair to him to be accused of unacceptable words its really not fair l will acted stupid to talk to him while everything is clear now. The past that I had is cancer guy I have no nothing now but to forgive and forget everything. I want a new beginning clear and smooth and nothing to worry about any rough road this is life everyday is learnt lesson we get failed cos we never learnt to face our mistake but still part of being a better person.. Thanks to you and best wishes we will get there in perfect time