What now?



  • Hi,

    Two years ago I met this guy, I was just getting out of a relationship and to be honest he was unexpected. He was not my type physically and just so different from what I am usually attracted to. His family and my family are from the same place. In fact my grandmother and his dad are very good friends but we'd never met before then. We had the most amazing 3 weeks together and when we parted I felt like I'd known him forever.

    So we began seeing each other it was long distance I am in the US he is in the UK. I would go see him. I spent the holidays with him and it was amazing. But we always had an issue with him coming to see me (I was engaged it fell apart and it was probably the most humiliating thing ever) He'd met my mom my sister and grandmother but I was not ready for him to meet the rest of my family. He'd push and it would make me more adamant about not wanting him to come.

    To make a long story short we are both very big personalities and neither one would back down and that led to some pretty explosive fights so we broke up. He believed the reason I wouldn't let him come is because I had a boyfriend (not the case) we talked for months and tried to work things out. But I miss him so much. Honestly I miss him everyday and its been months we talk. I know he loves me but I dont know how to fix things and I want to. Is it even worth fixing with the distance all that we have been through. Its been over two years since we met and I cant imagine being with anyone else. Can two stubborn aries make it work. What does the future hold if it holds anything

    Any insight would be greatly appreciated. I sit here listening to the winds howling outside and I just miss him...



  • If you give me your birthdates, I will check astrological compatibility.



  • And I'm afraid that 'not wanting him to meet the rest of the family' was his yardstick by which he judged how you felt about him. Now he thinks you weren't serious about him or the relationship and were even maybe ashamed or embarrassed to let him meet your family.



  • Both of our birthdays are the 12th of April



  • ugh who knew my sister was a tarot member as well. Due to the hurricane I am at her house because my neighborhood was evacuated and I never realized she was logged into tarot as well. Lol. But yes we are both aries our birthdays are April 12th



  • So I am just feeling sorry for myself today. My apartment is under about 10 ft of water. I went home to check my street looks like a river I couldn't even go inside. I've lost the guy I love. Its even making me resentful of all of the happy people around me. I won't say I am miserable but I miss him, Everyday I wake up I feel like I am missing something.



  • Maybe I can ease your mind somewhat. This is a bad combination for any sort of longterm love commitment so it probably wouldn't have worked out well at all. The prevailing theme would have been frustration, for in many areas of life this is not a realistic pairing. The two of you are usually involved in doing things for others - planning, organizing, executing, maintaining - but can rarely allow others to do anything for you. I would expect quite a bit of struggle in this relationship, then, over who will do what. Two Aries living together or in a love affair may experience impossible difficulties in the long run. Usually guided by fixed ideas and ideologies, you two may engage in a constant struggle for supremacy unless you have exactly (or close to) the same viewpoint. You should both really get involved with personalities other than your own, with people who have other needs for your strengths to fill. Even a friendship here would suffer from ideological conflicts. Sharp disagreements can break out over how the social contributions you both wish to make to others are to be made.

    I feel that you MON are needing more self-love and that because of this, you fell for someone who was very like you in many ways, someone who understood you. The hole inside you is for the love and understanding and nurturing you don't give yourself - you don't appreciate your strengths and talents, and dwell more on your weaknesses or what you don't have. Feed yourself love and then you will give off loving vibes that will attract the right partner for you.



  • thank you. We definitely did have power struggles (he usually gave in) I do think two aires can be difficult together but at the same time I have dated Leo's and sags and aquarius all good matches for the aries person and it never felt like this. To be honest most of our issues were when we were apart, When we were together it just felt right. Not because I was lonely or not loving myself (the opposite is true in fact everything in my life is all about me, I do what makes me happy and puts my mind at ease regardless of who it upsets) it has in fact driven away quite a few people, and I think my selfishness has also played a big part in the ruining of this relationship. I am a total control freak and it spills over into every area of my life. With him I am guilty of a lot of if you dont do this then...

    You know what I mean? I do realize we aren't the ideal match but I honestly felt our issues were minor and things coming to an end basically was me saying you can't do this my way then goodbye. Now I regret it. From the moment I said the words I regretted it but admitting I am wrong is never easy. Even now just talking to him about it everytime I just choke on my pride and I can't do it



  • Self-centredness is not necessarily self-love. Or perhaps you just loved this man because he was so like you?