Tarot Nick - may I have a reading?



  • I didn't forget you...I'll try tomorrow night.



  • Hi Danceur

    your upset that you haven't found anything yet,

    something is coming soon though

    keep your mind open, something new... maybe not the way you would usally do something

    I don’t think you are looking for social approval...more like you want things to work normally like everyone else

    seems like you were happy with a friend that you known

    ok looks like you are going to learn something new...school learning or new application

    you will be able to hope again, just don’t get caught up in the little things, don’t let them bog you down

    who have you been worrying about…someone she is smart and quick witted...someone who would look out for you

    someone is trying to give you advise but you are not listening, like you don’t want to hear what was said

    there is someone being false to you...sneaky feeling but he will be caught..

    I'm guessing the last guy was a friend...where you thought there might be happiness...your going to be disappointed.

    here you go...talk soon

    Nick



  • Thanks a lot, Nick.

    Almost all of the things you mentioned are things I've been experiencing in the last few months, so perhaps it's just an ongoing theme at this juncture in my life.

    I have been learning new things, because of the project I was assigned to.

    One of the challenges I'm facing, however, is my team leader - again. Previously I felt like she didn't take my feedback into consideration on our usual work scope. But on this project, a lot of the elements are new to everyone. I notice that in such situations she tends to push tasks onto me (or fade into the shadows), instead of investing the time to learn how to do the new things. That's just her style. She would rather that I do the dirty work, so to speak, and just piggy-back on the knowledge gained.

    The manager who's leading the project seems to sense that I'm an easier target, so she too has been 'using' me to get things done - instead of going to the team leader. I know the manager is in over her head and I'm trying to help, but i do feel resentful at times. It's one of those projects that wasn't thought through properly. Because a lot of it involves work with other departments, and task experts (and their own set of processes and timelines), even minor elements that go unnoticed now will result in delays, or issues for us later on.

    To be honest, I could step up and do some of these tasks because I don't mind learning. And I actually have been quietly doing a little 'behind the scenes' work, asking questions, doing research etc.

    But I don't want to take the lead on these areas because I feel it's beyond my pay grade to do it - and it's already a done deal that my contract won't be renewed (so there's really nothing in it for me, except maybe the learning bit). And since I'm leaving, it's actually more beneficial to my team leader to step up and be more hands-on.

    I have never shied away from asking questions, but because I'm in a support role - my curiosity is not always seen positively. I am often treated as if I'm overstepping - or I am not recognized for my effort. So I don't want to waste my time and energy unnecessarily anymore. Although I will always have this annoying trait of taking ownership of my work (with my effort being its own reward), I guess I'm becoming more conscious of the benefits of stepping up, and deciding when I will actually do so.

    My perception is that you may identify with this 'ownership/lack of recognition' situation - so I'm wondering how you deal with it, or how to maintain a balance between how much you give vs what you're getting back?

    I think the false person...was already caught. That's the guy I was contemplating dating a few months ago. We are only acquaintances, but he started to show possessiveness, and when I didn't let that take, he became mean to me, and pushed me away. So I distanced myself too. Recently, he tried to show affection again, but I was thoroughly uncomfortable with the gesture. I guess when i let go, I really let go. Anyway, I pretty much told him I didn't want to have anything to do with him (not in those words though).

    Hopefully there's no other false people LOL. The one I''m worrying about - could be the co-worker who's taking over my role. We've become friends, and it does concern me that she's signed up for more than she bargained for, in this job. But I also see that she can handle herself, so I'm not worried anymore.

    I'm starting to wonder if the 'advice-giver' i'm not listening to, is you? Because you've mentioned it more than once, and I can't think of anyone else, at this point. Sometimes it takes a while before the message sinks in well enough. When you're ready for change, things just happen.



  • Thanks, but I'm just a sounding board; You always hear me.

    So someone else must be trying to tell you something, and it was in the line of you don't want to hear it so you put up a block to the information.

    As for work, new tools in the tool belt always help. They fill out the Resume...

    You will be doing that for you, it sounds like Project Management along with what you do; Just my thoughts now, you won't get recognized for what you do and others will take the credit...just the situation you are in but it should give you confidence to know you can do it and experience you gain by doing it. Something new is coming so learn away... and if it doesn't work...you will still get the finger point...hahahah we call them deflectors at my job...shields up...

    It will be a personal challenge, I know you give more than what is called for in your work description, but that is a good thing, never stop being you. So if you want to take up the challenge it will be extra work for only personal gain. Others will gladly let you do it (less for them, especially if they don't know how to handle it) but leaning cross skills are good that is transferable to whatever you do.

    Whatever you are going to get soon will be new so maybe someone will recognize what you did, which will be a bonus of why you do what you do. They can never take that away from you...

    for me you know I don't play the game well, so I do what I do... and then shake my head...what was I thinking...hahahaha I had a situation at work, thank god it took me an hour to drive to work. I had a review and he gave me partial credit... I went nuts...drove in for the review...in that hour I calmed down and became rational. So we went around about over charging a job...original numbers came in and then there was a change in scope...many changes of scope and I have learn to document them. So I did in detail which pisses some people off, (can burn me twice for being nice) but I had no control over the money. They didn't sign the changes until 9 months after the my part of the job was done. So I was written up for doing my job...go figure...now my director knows this but found a way to say I was wrong because those numbers reflect on him too, to his boss. You know what flows downhill.... In the conversation I said when I do a job you get all of me...whither or not you want it...you get it. I am detailed and ask permission for all the hours that I did. I was given the ok so I proceeded. I take responsibility for my jobs and you never hear boo from me...which he loves because he doesn’t have to micro manage me. If I make a mistake...I stand up for it....others people CYA with email on every little thing... I can't do that, but I will say i goofed when I do and fix it as fast as possible and say it was me...but that is not the norm...

    So do what your heart tells you to do, and if it is more than what you get back...make yourself proud, because you have to be comfortable with you first... hard work is sometimes dirty but the completion is a feeling that no one can take away.

    Nick



  • Hi Nick,

    Sorry for the late reply - been busy with finishing up at the job, contract will end in a few days.

    I hear ya - and so much of what you're saying resonates with me and my situation. Somehow I cannot imagine you going nuts and being really mad. You seem like a cool cat and nothing fazes you 🙂

    The way you work - it reminds of how I do things, in some ways. I take ownership of all that I do -and do the best I can. I don't broadcast my hard work or achievements and I take responsibility for errors. I don't fixate on mistakes or assign blame - I'm more of a problem-solver (eg an issue has cropped up, how can we fix this). Because my supervisor didn't have answers and kept pushing me off in any other direction than hers, I learnt to just bypass her if I needed clarification or info. No point wasting time. And then she told me I wasn't being inclusive and that I could learn to leverage on others' knowledge instead of doing everything myself. That's really rich, considering she doesn't want to help.

    On one hand she says I don't step up and do more, although I'm competent at my work. But on the other hand, she says I do everything myself. She is not supportive, where it counts, when I raise issues, make suggestions or ask for help. Today really took the cake. I received a poor rating for my performance bonus. I’m getting just less than half. She cited some complex clinical and mathematical way of calculating it. And I felt totally affronted.

    How quickly they forget your hard work and achievements. It’s not just that I was efficient, I feel I added value. Because of my curious nature, I tended to seek answers from task owners (cos the supervisor didn’t want to help, or lead in the troubleshooting) and do my own research and unknowingly plugged a lot of gaps in knowledge that we didn’t even know we didn’t know. I also continually streamlined and improved processes in my work scope, without being asked. I did a lot of my own volition. The way she’s acting now is as if I was totally inept the whole time, and things got magically done and solved by themselves.

    The lady who's replacing me told me the supervisor had blamed me for things behind my back. And does it to her too. Supervisor and the other boss kept telling her she was not doing a good job – when she’s bright and capable - until she had enough and resigned this week. She says it’s likely that the supervisor is jealous of me, and intimidated and insecure because I know more.

    Although I had pretty much learnt to ignore my team leader’s antics this year, I felt unravelled today. I didn’t realize that she was a snake – I just thought our personalities clashed.

    I just wanted what was due to me, and it’s unfortunate that she’s in a position to withhold it.

    I told her I would seek a re-evaluation and I have managed to get several testimonials on my work performance from others to support my claim. I am planning to go higher up, to the Director. But since he has not worked with me and all he knows is second hand info from my supervisor – this is a long shot. I still don’t know if this is a good idea. He’s a reasonable man and a seasoned arbiter – but he’s probably been fed lies too about me.

    I’m so sorry for the rant. Just needed to get it out of my system.

    I was offered a contract job at my previous workplace (where I also was bullied but performed really well in the end). They told me they thought of me for this new role as they knew they could trust me to do a good job (although I had only worked there for 4 months). But I had to turn it down because I’m a mismatch to the culture of the organization. If you remember, I really suffered there. My former supervisor totally understood my point, because she was the only one who accepted my differences and knew how to get the best out of me – whereas I was bullied by the others, and gossiped about. And there is a misfit in terms of language/culture.

    But now I’m still wondering about a job – am I close to getting a suitable one? I have tried to apply for things outside my usual, but without success. May I have a reading?



  • Oh, so it actually has a name - workplace bullying.

    I thought she was just being an idiot.

    I read an article and it describes how bullies target those who are competent, liked by others, the go-to people and often the most skilled in the group. They target them because they don't want to share credit or recognition (even perceived) so they put people down to make them appear less valuable to the organization.

    The most often targetted people are those who desire to help, heal, teach, develop and nurture others - as bullies perceive that these people take away their power. And they also target those who are fair, honest, ethical and have integrity, quiet and non-confrontational.

    So apparently I was a perfect target, cos I have all of the above traits. I pushed back (am not a doormat) but I tolerated a lot and did not call her out on things - that is what even my replacement observed. To me the less I reacted, the better I felt overall. But I guess it also emboldened her.

    I feel better now actually. Less indignant than yesterday. Want to learn to move on from this and reach a better vantage point for the next opportunity.



  • Why was I not surprised they found a way to limit your bonus; I know I am a dollar short on replying but to go to your director you need to have quantitative proof. You had to CYA with the email and if I know you, you didn't do that because I only do it on rear occasions (we seem to have similar reactions). It becomes a he said she said unless you can prove either her numbers were wrong or clear cases where you were wronged. Even when you have email if it is perceived you did what she said…doesn't matter and you are wasting your emotions. Yes it takes a lot to get me mad, but I’m no angel; trick is to calm yourself so you can be the intelligent person that you are and chalk it up to a learned lesson so it doesn't happen again. (and yes I am telling myself that as I write)

    Ok lets see what I picked up,

    There’s peace knowing you did everything you could at work, you did your best so take the well-deserved breath and prepare what’s coming.

    Impatience, anxiety wanting it to happen now

    It will work out but time and patience is needed, continue to do everything you can and it will work

    A guy pops up, he can be nice and generous, but hasty and can have mood swings

    Whatever you were learning work wise will help you start something new…good feeling (just need time)

    You want something before it’s time, (easy to say you need to slow down not be in a rush or want it too bad)

    You will work well with others, make a plan and watch it happen

    You worried about betrayal, loss of a friend

    Separation, things that you couldn't see happened, feeling of a loss

    Happiness is coming… a new friend…feels like a spark

    Increase in money from whatever job you get, you ply your trade well….

    hope that helps,

    Nick



  • Thanks Nick - for the reading, and for being a sounding board.

    I think you can tell that I'm going nuts with this.

    Well maybe it's just a self-reflection thing. For me to make sense of things and then close the book.

    I think my first fatal flaw is believing that others see value the same way. Perhaps because I’m introverted and lack confidence, I’m reluctant to take on anything on a broader/more public scale. I just work from the heart/instinct, anticipating needs, seeing opportunities for enhancement or process improvement, but often adding value individually in small ways that only customers see and appreciate. My efforts indirectly raise the knowledge/excellence of the team, letting customers expect a higher level of service from us. But as I found out – not everyone appreciates this because it ‘forces’ them to keep up with the expectations, when they would prefer to remain with status quo.

    It never really crossed my mind until these last few months and weeks, but I guess I’m well-liked by employees (customers). They were so quick to respond to my request for character references these last few days – it was truly humbling. One of them even asked me to consider a role in his own department – which I’m not qualified for, but he was prepared to at least consider me without seeing my CV.

    Contrast this to the fact that my supervisor intentionally passed me over for the permanent position that was available a few months ago, and told others I wasn’t interested. It was a sneaky scenario in which she told me I could apply for similar roles in sister companies, but she never sat me down to tell me they wanted me to apply for the role in my own company – leading me to think they wanted someone more qualified.

    Hence, Fatal flaw No.2: I often don’t ask for what I want. I thought they would approach me because that’s how it’s always happened with previous jobs (when people are sincere about retaining my services). But it’s my mistake that I didn’t ask for the job too.

    Even now that my replacement has resigned and is serving out notice, my supervisor happily let me leave as well – writing me off instead of asking if I’d be interested. Of course, under the circumstances (that I’m finally aware of how I’ve been subtly bullied, and of how my replacement has been bullied into leaving) – it’s inappropriate to stay anyway. So I guess things have worked out for the better.

    I’m actually not mad anymore. I agree it’s a waste of emotions – I just needed to let it out.

    I did do a last attempt to justify my position, by resending a final and very detailed account of my achievements. You are totally right - I’m like you (rarely keep others on copy unless necessary). My work is not really measurable by numbers. If they really wanted to do an accurate appraisal they would have to get feedback from employees and vendors – but instead, it’s up to what my supervisor thinks (even though she never took an interest in what I did). My director didn’t want to get involved at all, no surprises there. I think it’s possible I may get a slightly higher amount but that’s all. They will never acknowledge that they were totally wrong about me.

    It’s just in my personality to do things quietly because I’m self-motivated and take pride in my work. I believe that actions speak for themselves, and I do not have to broadcast them. If people were genuinely interested, they would make the effort to know more. How do you motivate someone who is already self-motivated? To me, it’s showing appreciation and noticing the little things, and definitely not withholding dues at the eleventh hour.

    I'm starting to see that as long as you are not seen as stepping up in obvious ways, taking the lead on projects or being loud about your achievements, management will still perceive that you’re not doing anything and you will be side-lined. In our case, we had the misfortune of having a supervisor who tosses us whatever work she cannot complete – but then never ‘remembers’ our help and instead, when we enact boundaries about doing HER WORK, she uses that as an excuse to cite that we’re not team-players.

    I don’t really talk unless I have an opinion or genuine interest in something. But there are people who make it a point to speak up in meetings, only because they want to be seen as contributing/participating. It’s very fake – but still, they are perceived more favorably than those who are quietly pro-active, who do more and talk less.

    Yes I know I’m terrible at the game – I don’t even play it. Makes me wonder what kind of job I should be in, so that I don’t keep putting myself in this position.

    This is where I'm seeking your advice again. I cannot change who I am - and even though people can always find fault with the fact that I'm different, I add value in unique ways. How can I turn this around for myself nonetheless - without playing the game?

    There's good things that have come out of this - namely self-awareness. Plus, the fact that I feel myself bouncing back to a happy place soon after being so upset - lets me know that there is greater emotional sobriety now. That I do know my own value - just that I forget it sometimes... and it really helps to write to you, so that I can put things in perspective 🙂

    Yes speaking of a job, I am indeed antsy and your reading clearly shows that. But yes I’m trying to let things work out on their own too, and not get ahead of myself. And just enjoy this well-deserved free time (and try not to worry too much about $$$) as I've not had a proper break in a year.

    Besides my usual, I’m also looking out for jobs in which I have applied/transferable competencies. There’s no harm trying. In the grander scheme of things, we are all here to learn and better ourselves. We probably have more abilities than we know – just that we may not give ourselves the opportunities to find out. I only wish it wouldn’t be seen as job-hopping.

    I find myself in a bit of a quandary. I seem to enjoy one-to-one interactions with internal customers (employees) - even though I'm introverted - that is, if i know my work well. It brings out the service-oriented and warmer side of me. And there's a sense that anything good that I bring to the table, is meant to be shared with others. But I do wonder if I'm better suited for a job with a more limited audience, that would allow me to be my more private self. Something more desk-bound, which either involves writing/editing or both (eg proof-reading), or of a more technical nature (eg the one managing data) - and in which there's far less face to face interactions.

    I just don't want to revert to becoming too insular and existing in my head... as I think opening up has been really good for me, although I'm still a shy one.

    Any thoughts?



  • What are you thinking...sit down your rocking the boat...you can't just do the right thing and help people...that means we would have to follow suite...extra work...sit down relax...hahahaha as I stare at you...what is she thinking....hahahaha I can just see it.

    Your supervisor seems to want someone to just toe the line, easier to manage, like teaching to the average student, don't do things on your own...just keep pace.

    As you know standing on just who you are and what you accomplish will not get you far. It is a trap that we fall into; why should I pound my chest, look at me I did this; I got the customer to say what a great job I did (mean while you just triple charged them so you could have slack time to do what you should have done in the first place) I can't tell you to do that because I don't; the key is what you had said about the self-awareness; its a balance, be who you are, be happy and do the best you can... it will work itself out because what you will end up with something you are good at and feel accomplishment. You care which is important to you (maybe not to others) you can put your head on the pillow and have peace (others do too, they just don't care or the ends make the means) What your left with is your quandary...you may be introverted but caring so you work well with customers. They get that you care! so don't be afraid that you aren't cut out for that, you can be solitary in other areas or find ways for alone time. You don't have to be a social butterfly to be a good people person. I mean I'm a hermit, but I love to help people. Customers like me because I am real and they know I will try my best. In a crowd I am the one on the outside of the circle; I rather let my work stand for itself even if I am the only one that notices. I know this helps me understand where I am, it doesn't answer the other question of I want to be in another position, because I don't taunt out loud look at me, I don't get recognize for doing the work I do. I am appreciated and respected but that doesn't count in the game. Working from home helps me combat that and being around my family so its a balance. I accept not being where I think I can be for the other options. I am slowly working on another tool in the belt to give me another option, but I am not forced to use it yet. Know who you are and what your strengths and weakness are and pick your best choices. I know you will be fine, don't sell yourself short and open what ever door you would like, don't be afraid to try something new; customer skills transcend to all areas.



  • Funny I am re-reading what I wrote...I didn't mean to talk about myself...it was meant more as an example... you are not alone.

    Be happy with you...and the rest will work out... let me know if you need anything else and I'll talk more about myself...hahahahha...at least I am consistent in the bad jokes....hahahaha



  • Thank you so much Nick – your advice is really meaningful.

    And actually – I learn so much when you share about your own experiences, so feel free to do so. I’m facing some of the same challenges you’ve dealt with before – and you’ve found ways to make things work for you – so it helps me understand how to put things into perspective when you share examples of what’s happened with you.

    For me, I really don’t need recognition or appreciation - it only came up as a point because they were trying to cut corners with my bonus. Other than that, I prefer doing things quietly (I’m a Hermit and I like to help people too). I'm not a people person - quite the opposite - but somehow I enjoy working with internal customers.

    “I accept not being where I think I can be for the other options.” That’s a great line. I’m also trying to find a balance in my life.

    But I find it difficult to maintain employment because I choose to be who I am, and not pander to what I think will be acceptable to others. I’ll do a contract for 6 months or a year, and then there’s restructuring or no renewal, and then on to the next and next. You know the drill…I’ve been through 3 jobs I think, since I’ve started writing to you.

    To some extent, I’d say it’s because of my energy. I have a restless vibe and perhaps it wouldn’t suit me to stay in the same place for long – so I just don’t get the option. On the other hand, I also think it’s because I don’t play the game, and I’m seen as someone who cannot be controlled. They say they want someone who works independently but then they become unsettled when you also come with an independent mind and opinions. It doesn’t matter how well I’ve done with the work or customers, and that I’m approachable and diplomatic. Eventually, there’s no room at the inn.

    Talking about the bonus – I managed to get a revision on the amount. It’s 50% higher now, after I asked for a re-evaluation. I always knew that my supervisor didn’t know/care about what I did and had already written me off. This really shows that. I had to write a mini-thesis about my achievements and attach character references from internal customers (and cc the boss) – before being given my dues (or close to it). I know I must have forced her hand, but I’m glad I stood up for myself.

    I’ve only begun this journey of self-discovery in the last year or so, but I think I’ve already moved too far along the path to go backwards. Although I sometimes forget (under trying circumstances), I do see the value of who I am and in how I do things- and it’d be really nice if an employer knew how to harness my differences and abilities, instead of being afraid of them.

    Sometimes I wonder if I should be glad that my job keeps changing (and this is exactly what works for me, given my nature) - or be mindful that I could be doing things better to improve job stability, while still being me? What do you think?



  • Danceur,

    It comes down to what works for you; as long as you realize all the criteria that comes with that decision. Do the old good, bad list to help you look at your thoughts on paper.

    Good: exciting and new, it doesn't get mundane and it seems to meet your needs being you in the big picture you don't want to be stuck (not in a mean way just ask yourself why) always learning something new, you like change!

    Bad: Not feeling the love because you are just a temporary contractor, am I going to get a job, during the ending where is my next opportunity?, deal with new people, the learning curve of the office structure

    just a short list you get the idea, if you weigh both sides and in the big picture and it works for you, then that is all that counts.

    You always hear stories of people who need to keep moving, like the traveling cowboy..or the wandering spirit in a person won't let them stay long; so if this works for you and you work with it then all you need to do is not get anxiety when it takes time, because you are accepting that part of your choices, it is part of the decisions you are making. It's like for me I know I am done at work, I have stopped learning and because I am who i am (don't play the game) I won't grow here; but working from home, having my mother-in law living in the house and helping in taking care (I hate nursing homes) it is worth the sacrifice...When things change I will have the option to change...ever growing and learning...and that is the cool thing...you are never stuck...just look at your choices and accept your free will...

    sorry if this is a little choppy...i'm bored at a conference call...but part of my brain it still there...hahaha



  • Hey Nick,

    Good points you raised there.

    I feel like I play tug of war sometimes with the thoughts in my head. On the one hand, I want stability and predictability. On the other hand, I crave freedom, and open-mindedness. But more than either of that, I really just want to be myself on the job and see that bear fruit.

    One of the key things that has changed over the last year of self-discovery is that I am now allowing myself to see my differences as a strength. I spent most of my life wishing to be the same as others - but it seems the 'beastie' will not be reigned in. Yes I do get on the wrong side of people at work because I appear to challenge the herd by walking a different path sometimes. They make it about them – but really, it’s not. I have simply seen the value of being able achieve things, by being me, and without having to be the same as others.

    It's not that I like the newness that temporary jobs bring. It's just that I adapted my expectations somewhat and am willing to take on temporary jobs – for I figure that I will still be learning, plus I can pay the bills – and we never know where the path can take us. It seems those who work with me on a shorter term basis are also more likely to accept that I’m different.

    But I do want a more long term role, not many short term ones. Not only because of financial stability and peace of mind, but also because there just isn’t enough time to contemplate things and develop my potential if I keep moving from one job to the next. Just like in this last job – I still feel like I had more to learn and achieve, although in other ways, it had already served its purpose of helping me along the path to self-appreciation.

    Perhaps, a job is like a shell – a means by which we learn and grow. And it doesn’t matter what form the job comes in. I’m not just a Hermit, I think I might be more akin to a Wandering (+ Wondering) Soul. When I outgrow the role or circumstances, I will naturally move on or evolve, or the opportunity will cease to be.

    And I just only thought of this, but perhaps the feeling of being stuck comes from holding on to circumstances which no longer work in the light of person I'm becoming. In letting go of external anchors, conditioned responses, and trying to build a foundation just within the self, I'm moving into unknown territory. I sometimes feel rootless and then I might cling to the last known point of reference - forgetting that I am no longer that person, and I can only go forward.

    Does that make sense?

    It is not the dynamism of constant change and learning that drives and sustains me – but just simply being able to make my own contribution within a culture of openness and autonomy. From the perspective of personal contemplation and internal change - which is the stage that I'm at or hovering around - it makes sense.

    I suppose this is my version of pros and cons, sort of. I can’t go back to how I used to be – for I have outgrown the wish to be the same as everyone else. I like being different, even though it does bring heartache at times (LOL).

    At this point, I’ve still not had any luck with interviews. Am trying not to freak out – really trying. It helps that I love free time, and the peace and quiet of being at home.

    I think it’s cool that you’ve found an arrangement that works for you. I really hope to find that for myself.

    Sooner rather than later, please 🙂



  • Dear Tarot-Nick,

    Can I please have a reading. My life has taken many twists and turns as of late. My dob is 11/26/62.

    Thanks so much,

    Sharon



  • Hey Sharon,

    This is actually my personal thread, not a general one.

    You can create a new one to request for a reading from Nick.

    Danceur



  • Hi Nick,

    I feel like I'm doing the proverbial "are we there yet" - except it's the "is the job coming yet" 😛

    There seem to be more viable opportunities lately, but still no leads. Had one call for a temp job but I think I blew it, because I've been very sick lately and I had to keep postponing the phone interview because the illness is playing cat and mouse. Hmmm, kinda like the job.

    May I have a reading?

    Thanks!



  • Hi Danceur

    Something is unstable...not what you want to hear

    Disappointed, money/job hasn't come in

    Doubt is setting in

    Some luck coming soon

    Things will or have started to turn in the right direction

    Joy in wanting to succeed

    money and joy coming

    You have been thinking of a opportunity with a friend

    Good news, a friend seems to help

    What you want to happen will while you work well with others

    You have a good guy watching out for you

    That had smiles in it

    Nick



  • Thanks Nick,

    It's always nice to see in your readings that I will work well with others. Being at home so much is isolating - and I just get comfortable in Hermitland, and forget how to collaborate with others.

    Yeah smiles are good 🙂

    I do believe in energy and attraction - and feeling so miserable and negative probably repelled any job opportunities. I have not been this sick in a decade and all my usual meds didn't seem to work for some reason. I'm so glad I'm finally recovering slowly 🙂

    Even though there is no 'proof' yet in the way of interviews and such, I do feel that something has shifted - hopefully it won't be long now.

    I also found myself thinking of trying to get into some kind of sports rehab for my back injury - when I'm earning again, that is. Anything I tried initially seemed to make it worse so I just left it alone. But it's been 2 years - and I've lost a lot of range of motion. If I could regain that, perhaps I could consider different work opportunities - and build up my tool-belt as you call it 🙂

    I've held back from drastic job changes because of financial commitments too - and I can only imagine the 'instability' you mentioned could be financial in nature?

    It's showed up in your readings quite a lot - about me being impatient for change. And it's true. I'm growing and changing, and going out of sync with my present circumstances. I've held on hope so long for a viable long term opportunity in my current line of work, but there is always that restlessness... like I just want to close that chapter, and do something else.

    If there was a way for me to do something different, yet maintain equivalent income and pay off all my dues - that's what I want. I think it doesn't seem to be working that I've been waiting to clear debt before trying something new - because I just lose momentum along the way.

    Any thoughts?



  • I remember in a prior readings I had said to be open to new opportunities.

    So I think you are starting to open up for new ideas... exciting and nerve racking.

    Just be you and I know you will be fine.

    If I remember there was someone who offered a interview, but it wasn't in your field. I only say that because you can transcend your knowledge to other forms. The way you think can open up doors; something is coming... just keep an open mind...

    I'll be waiting to hear,

    Nick



  • Hi Nick,

    I finally came into 2 viable job opportunities over the last 2 weeks, went for interviews and I have received an offer. It's weird but the offer is for company I didn't have a great impression of. Red flags were going off when the interviewer (who is the Director) kept telling me the mistakes/mis-steps the company has made, how messy and uncertain things are etc, how they have fired people previously etc, her philosophies on life and career. It was a fairly one-sided conversation, but it seems she liked me as she has now offered the role.

    But I really wanted the other job. I felt really good vibes at the 1st interview and I got on good with the interviewer (who would be the team leader). They have an open and more flexible work culture which I am really looking for. I believe the 'fit' will be better, in terms of culture, job scope, previous experience, and my personality. The 2nd interview with the boss was less congenial and tough though, and I didn't perform as well as I wanted.

    I'm quite certain I would pick this job if it were offered to me. But I have not heard back from them, so it's likely they've gone with another candidate.

    For the first time, all the opportunities are for permanent positions. It means that for the first time in 7 years, I will be receiving all the additional array of company benefits which contractors/temps do not have.

    So you were right in your previous readings, things have shifted. The offer I received was initially for a contract role - but it seems one team member quit and they're willing to consider me for a permanent headcount instead.

    And a peculiar thing, there was 1 'almost interview' back in June when I was still working. They hired someone before we could finalize interview dates.

    Anyway, this job is now available again after 3 months. Maybe the new hire left, or perhaps one of the existing staff has left, or it might even be an additional headcount. It's also a position in which I'll learn. Am wondering whether to email the company and ask if I can be considered. It feels a little like poking the bear...

    I guess I'm just not at ease with the idea of having an offer with a company that isn't my preferred choice, and with which I have reservations. Especially since it is a permanent position. I already have concerns on how I might fit in and consequently, how long I can stay (and it is generally said that you need to be prepared to stay at least 3years or so in a perm role, else it will affect the perception of your work history - and mine is already spotty).

    I do not feel this uneasiness with the other job (the one with a more flexible culture). I feel this is this is my gut instinct telling me what I want (and do not want). I would probably run off with the other company if I had the option.

    Of course, if I'm down to this 1 offer - I will go with that and make the best of it, I always do.

    But I could really use some advice. May I have a reading?

    Thanks!


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