Tarot Nick - may I have a reading?



  • Hi Danceur,

    first off from me... it's ok to send an email thanking the company for the opportunity, I don't consider that poking the bear.

    Change is always fun...but just because it's for a permanent job that doesn't mean you are stuck there if you don't like it. It would just mean you would have to start the search over again...If you love your job...it doesn't feel like a job....hahahaha minus the people and the games...hahahaha

    Here is your reading

    build up your strength and keep plugging away, the right one will happen

    I think you will start to see some responses...keep working at it

    remember to focus though, don't just throw the ideas up in the air hoping the right one will fall

    its OK to be strong when you need to be

    as you had said above; it seems one of the jobs gave you a offer

    its OK to have dreams but it is also prudent not to be just a dreamer... work out what you need and what is important

    remember you also need to do what is right for you, something about needing approval from others.

    who's the guy you are worrying about...he can be nice and has a lot of energy...but he can also be a jerk and hurt....

    a different guy who is a good talker and listener

    a third guy? hahahaha a bit of a dreamer...laid back...low keyed

    things will work out because you worked hard at it

    Hope that helps,

    Nick



  • Thanks Nick!

    Oh I think I confused you there.

    I went for interviews at 2 companies. In the 3rd company, the interview did not happen (3 months ago) because they hired someone before I could confirm my availability. The position is now vacant again and I was wondering whether to email them to ask if I could reapply. “Poking the bear” – I meant that I’m already confused about the situation (with 2 companies), so it may not help me to introduce another opportunity into the mix.

    Early this week, I emailed the company which I prefer to ask if I’m still being considered for the job. They said they’d provide an update but the date has passed. I believe they could have chosen someone else and are putting me on the back-burner in case their first choice doesn’t pan out. So I sent a follow up email to ‘chase’ them. It is not my preferred way, but time is running out on the other offer.

    Unfortunately, I’m being pressured by financial concerns as my savings are drying up and I cannot afford to stay unemployed any longer. Were it not for money issues, I would hold out for the ‘right’ offer and probably not take the one that has been offered thus far. It is not a bad job – it’s just not the one I want.

    You’re right that I don’t have to stay at a company if it doesn’t work out. But there’s been so much movement in my job history (because of temp/contract jobs), that I do look like a job-hopper and it’s made it difficult for me to even get shortlisted for interviews. That's why I'm trying to count my blessings and am preparing to accept a job I don't want. But If I do take this permanent job and leave shortly after because it is not suitable, that could really burn my CV.

    You are right again – in this interview and offer negotiation process, I have felt as if I need to justify my worth. I don’t like feeling this way as I do think I’m good for the role I want - whether in terms of ability to do the job or my personality. But everything is coming under scrutiny and it's tough to remain unaffected. I am still trying to maintain some space to evaluate what I want/deserve though.

    I do believe Guy A is my ex – I got a bit nervous because he texted me a few times when we don’t keep in touch (although he’s in my social environment). We’ve remained largely silent to each other for 3 years.

    Believe Guys B and C are friends.

    You know, I’m a bit perplexed. How do you tell when you’re going with the flow, or leaving things to chance?

    Any other advice about my the situation would be appreciated too 🙂

    Thanks!



  • Danceur

    That I think is the main point of the reading this time. What is dream (or wish) and what you need...

    Good news is I feel confident that you will do well... that doesn't answer your question

    What I can say is have a plan and a goal on what you want. That will focus you on what you need, besides the need for money. A dream would be a wish job and doing nothing just hoping it falls in your lap. I don't see you doing that.

    A thought, with all the companies doing contractors, I don't think changing companies hurts you. The spin is you are being diversified, and bringing many skills with you...experience

    The interviewer should pick up on it, be comfortable with yourself...sell it...don't feel pigeon toed

    That is easy to say being I'm not paying the bills...



  • Hi Nick,

    Funny you said pigeon-toed - I had that when I was a kid. It's probably the pre-cursor to all the alignment/injury issues I developed as an adult.

    I do hear you - need to have a plan, and focus. I know I am kinda floaty and scatter-brained...it's all that restless Sagittarius energy.

    Unfortunately all that energy has turned into panic as the job offer that I thought was solid, has been put on hold. I don't know why - and I'm all in a tizzy now because I was counting on starting work next week. So I'm scrambling to try and find short term work assignments now.

    In the meantime, I am still hearing responses, as you said, including rejections and new leads. There was a job I had applied for 2 months ago. The agent called to check if I might still be available. I'm not qualified, but I would sure love to be trained and become good at it 🙂 So I asked the agent to re-check the client's requirements.

    Perhaps people here are less open-minded. I've never seen my contract roles as inferior, but they seem to. I have managed to 'sell' my work experience so far though.

    What i meant was there is a bias. People feel that one should be grateful for having a perm job and there had better be a darn good reason if you leave before the typical 3 year mark. That's just the mindset I guess. For some reason companies are allowed to terminate your job at anytime, if it is in their own interests. But when you do it, it's taboo.

    The good thing about all this upheaval is that I am getting a sense of what I value, eg expansion of certain skill-sets, flexibility at work, etc. I did know these things before but it's hard to keep them in focus as the $$ issue is really weighing on my mind.



  • Hi Nick,

    So I'm settling into this new temp job. Pleasantly surprised that i get on very well with my boss. She's diplomatic and good with people and I can express myself quite freely, which I really like. I hope the appreciation is mutual. But no surprises that because I'm quiet and do my own thing, and leave work on time, some of the others (mostly women) give me the evil eye. I believe I'm the subject of gossip. Is it very hard for people to accept those who are different. I mean, how would life be interesting if we were all the same? Anyways, I'm glad to be earning again 🙂

    May I have a reading? Just a lot of things I'm feeling lately.

    Thanks.



  • Hi Danceur,

    here you go,

    some kind of misunderstanding with a guy

    there is a temptation and a choice to make

    feels like an overload of emotions...making it uncomfortable

    things worked out like it should

    seems like you needed approval or acceptance lately

    emotions are running strong, have patience and courage you will get through

    you haven't changed you can do what you need too, you are strong...be strong

    the person you have been worrying about has a choice, it's like he is putting off a decision and it is just sitting there

    that seems to lead to stagnation

    there's a bump in the road coming

    watch money, it feels like you put a lot of work into something and you feel like what did it get me

    hope that helps,

    Nick



  • Hi Nick,

    Wow this reading is really accurate.

    My emotions are all over the place.

    I haven't expressed anything to the guy but I was really upset (not so much anymore) at what I perceived as a slight. It seemed to me that he made a snide remark to my face and tried to cover it up with humor as there were others around. Do you get a sense if I'm the one who's misunderstanding things, and he doesn't realize at all? Or are we both upset at each other?

    I'm a little surprised my boss doesn't pop up in this reading. Although I think she's nice, she's really driving me crazy. I'm so frustrated at work. She had been overwhelmed with things before I came in, and there's a huge backlog and she's often giving me things on short notice. And now both of us are overwhelmed. I think the 'needing approval' bit makes sense because this is the first time I'm working so closely with a boss and I need her agreement/approval on everything because a lot of it is new to me. And I'm working hard to finish my portion, only to get stalled because she doesn't have time to do hers. So I try to be creative and work around it as much as I can, but without her input, I can't complete the tasks. That sounds like what you mentioned... I feel incredibly stressed because I'm sitting on timelines for things that I can't complete without her involvement.

    In my previous jobs I did most things on my own, and didn't have to wait for others, so now I feel like I'm zooming off in an F1 car in the parking lot 😛

    Also we have different personalities and work styles. I don't play into politics and I don't care what people think, so I adopt a more straightforward albeit diplomatic approach. This sometimes ends up with 'feedback' going to her, instead of me. And it's making me upset because I know I didn't do anything wrong. I like to get things done and try to work smart, whereas she's very conscious about what others think. And she often asks me to do things the same roundabout way that she would do it - just to avoid any potential 'feedback'. I'm just thinking these people are spoilt and petty, and she's mollycoddling them.

    Thus, I find myself getting upset and irritated a lot and I'm just extremely tired and worn out...

    Is it the same guy or 2 different guys that you picked up on?

    And the bump in the road - is that financial in nature or do you just mean to watch money in general?

    Thanks.



  • Hi Danceur,

    Well what I pick up is your feelings, but communication goes both ways. I felt the angst you were feeling. The first couple of cards were like you want something because of the attraction, but there was anger or a feeling of not being settled with it, which is confusing you. The second one about the guy I can't say for sure that it is the same guy but it could be, by the way he can't make a decision and he is putting it off. the miss communication is working on both sides. If he is dragging his feet and your emotions are on high, signals may get crossed.

    A scary thought, just come out and say what you are feeling....leaving it out there. That could lead to either being hurt or happiness...because I am not sure he knows what he is feeling either. That would end the confusion one way or the other...just be honest...and look at the forth card...but you know me...i'm honest to a fault...I leave my feeling on my sleeve...which is why I don't play poker....(its the season...going for a small smile)

    lines 6 and 7 are about work...just keep plugging away...you can only be you...

    and the warning I think was money and job related...coming in the future... are you working on a short term contract? when I get it like that it's to warn to be smart for what is coming...it's like if you are forewarned you can be prepared. It is something you can deal with just know it may come.



  • Hi Nick,

    I'm confused because he's someone who 'is not good for me', and yet I'm attracted and tempted. I want something more, yet my mind says no don't go there. So you described it perfectly. I think he's the one whom you picked up on several times and you didn't like his energy 😛 He's someone I dated briefly 3 years ago.

    I've been trying to let go (I know it's a process) and I'm actually ok with things being ambiguous and just a fantasy in my mind - because I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with the consequences of it blowing up in my face if we try to move it forward.

    The angst is because I was upset at the incident. It felt like out of the blue, he was hating on me because he made a remark that felt like he was belittling/making fun of me. But because of the context, only I would have been in a position to perceive that it was something he was addressing to me personally, and not sarcasm/a joke that he was leveling at the whole group of us. I could have sworn there was eye contact and then he tried to cover it up and make it sound less harsh. So I've been reacting emotionally in the last few days, because of my perception of this.

    My gut instinct is that I am not wrong about what I felt/observed, but that I could have misunderstood the magnitude of the issue. It could have been a passing remark which he doesn't remember by now and doesn't know that I took offense at. He does seem like someone who has a sharp tongue but generally he doesn't lash out at people unless they've done something first. And I didn't do anything. Or it could be that he's angry at me for some reason. So that's what I really meant - i don't know what happened here. I only know what I perceived.

    I don't think it is a good idea for me to just come out and say it. Because I do believe he is unsure of what he is feeling as well. I don't think we're good for each other or compatible. I certainly do not want to be with someone who can turn on me, just like that. But I can't make the feelings go away, so I have to just let them be...for now. I had actually let go of most of the feelings for a few years - and then he started talking to me a few months ago, and well it's messing with my mind/heart.

    Any thoughts?

    Yes i am working on a short term contract, but it's supposed to last till early May. If there are no major issues, I don't think they would terminate it early because they have a budget for this role into next year and my boss needs the help. I think I'm doing ok, all things considered. And it's kinda scaring me that your reading could be suggesting an issue with financial/job security, eg early termination/non-renewal? Because I am starting to feel secure that this role would be a stepping stone and that I would be able to find something better by the time the contract expires....



  • I'll admit this is where I'm bad, because the engineer in me comes out, so take it with a grain of salt. If you feel your gut telling you not to be attracted by the candle...don't fly to the light and get burnt. Now hopefully you just smiled.... I know you have mentioned this guy a few times and he is in your circle of living. Something in you is attracted, but you have learned caution because of being hurt. He seems to be giving you mixed feeling too, because he is on the fence himself (I am assuming lines 8-9 are that guy) and the million dollar answer is things will work out like they should, I bet when you read that you said oh great...that can go either way...hahahaha that tells me nothing. Then if you jump to the stagnation....means most likely neither of you will come out of the safe zone that you created. So safe is comfortable but that means not getting an answer either way...is that what you want?... something to think about...

    With work, your smart and strong, do what you think is right and either way you will walk away with growth... Putting yourself in situations that you haven't been before can be scary and make you go am I doing the right thing?....trust in you... and it's not dull....



  • Hi Nick,

    You've got this priceless sense of humor that always comes in at the best times.

    Thanks for that 🙂

    You know when you mentioned in your reading that it will work out as it should - I took it to mean that things will blow over and go back to nothingness. Status quo.

    We were on a high when we parted. In the honeymoon phase. That's why there are lingering feelings that we can't seem to shake. There's something kindred and familiar about him too.

    Somehow, focusing on him connects me back to old patterns of thinking - which are not helpful. It is not about him per se. I do not yet know how to maintain my alignment with who I have become and be with him (or maybe with anyone). Out of all the reasons I could give, this is probably the most important. It is not about whether we are compatible and he certainly has good qualities.

    I know nothing will give, if we stay in the 'safe zone'. That's how the last 3 years have been - an impasse. It's not easy feeling this way and doing nothing. There have been other people who were interested this past year but I just don't feel anything - except for this person I'm not meant to be with. But it might be in my best interests - just that perhaps my heart hasn't caught up to this yet? Maybe I still have to work on myself some more (could be a really long time) before I should be with someone.

    An interesting thing about work. Yesterday I received a call from someone I did a phone interview with a few months ago. I was keen on the role before, but not on the overtime. She seemed to like me, and said that if there was another opportunity when the company operations stabilized, she'd get in touch. And she has. I would still need to attend an interview and be selected - but they need someone in next month, and I told her that i had commited to staying for this current 6 months contract. And she said, well if you change your mind....

    How odd. And then I thought about your reading. I'm not sure if I was too hasty to turn it down. I really liked the idea of this role previously. It's a permanent position. And I'm in a job/company that I can't see a future in. So this seems like a way out. But something has changed. I feel like I want to attract different opportunities (don't know what they are yet) and this job feels like a step backwards in that context.

    What do you think?



  • Let me throw some thoughts at you...just me thinking out loud....

    Being you do a lot of contract work, which is ok, just a pain in transition...

    You had said that you wanted something long term but you signed up for the 6 months....how does that work do you have an out clause? and if you switch mid-stream how will that look for the next contract? that's the only thing I worry about... I am big on integrity, for me to be with myself, but work is just numbers...and it doesn't matter as long as you fit the bottom line...but you need to do what is right for you. With your skills you will open up doors, question becomes can you keep that door open? Can't hurt to reach out and talk, but is it just for comfort to go back to what you know you can do and would you be happy long tern not growing and not changing.

    Don't look behind the curtain...the thoughts just go flying then I filter them.

    When you asked these are the first things that popped up.

    What will make you happy? comfort and safety are fine but you are also looking for growth and satisfaction for self worth.

    thoughts to think about...



  • Thanks Nick,

    Definitely some good advice there.

    Yes I can leave by serving notice - it's been this way at all of my contracts. I don't intentionally pick contract jobs - just not been lucky with getting permanent roles.

    I don't see any future at my present job. Sure there's a lot of learning. But, I am getting depressed/moody at times because I'm overloaded and tired. There's a chance of a renewal - which I'll probably take if I can't find something new by April.

    Maybe the Universe heard me crying and sent this 'out' my way. And yet, I realized I'm not interested in this type of job anymore, aside from the lure of financial security that a permanent job would bring.

    Yes it's a job I'm qualified to do cos it's in the same field as my current job. But I feel I'm meant to do something different. Different from the current job, different from the previous ones.

    I want to be able to throw my CV out the window (cos it won't matter anymore). I just don't know what it is that I'm moving towards. I'm not worried that I don't know but I do wish I knew...would be easier.



  • Hey Nick,

    Been a tough week. A lot of angst regarding family matters. In addition, I had a talk with my boss too, she told me her boss has the perception I'm not doing enough work (cos I leave on time and my boss is still pulling long hours). My boss says she enjoys working with me and that things are ok so far. But I feel there is mismatch between her expectations and my abilities/what i want to do. So I shared my views candidly, and I hinted that she should consider her alternatives (meaning find someone else). 3 months left on my contract...think it's time to plan towards another job. Hope there are more opportunities this time round.

    Am getting a case of the "angsty Hermit", just want to get away from everything, everyone.

    May I have a reading? A little depressed, finding it tough to see through the murkiness of what i feel. Feel the weight so much I kinda slept away most of the weekend.



  • Hi Danceur,

    Here you are,

    a reminder to yourself that you are trust worthy and you give your best... always good to remind yourself...

    there is still confusion..but your getting a handle on it

    this card and the previous card i think go together...something was up with that guy...i get the feeling he wasn't be totally honest

    a power guy ...meaning he has position or place...looking out for himself and only for his needs

    recently you met someone, a guy...has energy and appears nice...look behind the curtain not just at the cover...

    what started out nice is turning and its not going to last

    you will be ok...not belly laugh happy but like a sigh and a smirk happy

    right now the feeling was you are your own worst enemy...doubt...unhappiness...your feeding off that, look at what you need to change and make it happen

    again its up to you to be you...be smart, observe and then make what you need to happen, don't question yourself

    a new friendship could happen

    watch what you spend, be frugal

    Nick



  • Hi Nick,

    Thanks for that.

    I hear you - about being careful with money. i tend to spend when I'm not feeling good - trying to get a handle on that.

    When you talked about 'what started out nice is turning and its not going to last' - do you get a sense it's about my job? OR something else?

    I was starting to get a grip on work - and see what I could change to make things easier - just try and stick it out no matter what others' perceptions were - but this curveball with family issues is throwing me so far out. Lost my equilibrium. And I just want to get out... but i need the job, so...

    Power guy could be any number of people in my company. But to me, it sounds like my dad. There were points in my childhood when I felt terrorized (and mum didn't help). He has some kind of anger disorder I think and he bullies people. Mellowed down somewhat over time, but he still has that streak in him and it's coming out more recently. Lately, the family has been tossed into a joint decision/project regarding the home (we're all living together). Guess I'm approaching it more from an emotional aspect, whereas the folks are more 'cerebral' about it. They do not want to compromise, and they dismissed our views. Said hurtful things to us. They want their way - no matter whom they hurt in the process. I've kept my distance and emotionally let go of my relationship to them over the last 5 years (it was what was best for me) but this matter is putting us back into the same emotional space - just finding it very difficult to deal with.. Any ideas?

    New guy - yes I'm looking behind the curtain alright. Could be the new friendship that you mentioned, although it felt like he might be interested in more than friendship. It seems he was married and now he's not - in less than 3 years. Could be recently separated (though maybe not legally). Lots of questions. Red flags?

    Lately, many people aren't who they seem. Not sure whom I can trust.

    I started out this year feeling that I was starting to come round to the idea of meeting someone new. But the job and family thing looks set to be a protracted issue. Maybe it's easier to be alone?



  • OK when stuff hits the fan, don't question yourself...you will always be you...say it with feeling and know it...smile because no one can take that; from you...that feeling of knowing will give you strength

    Yes, the feeling was that it was the job

    Lines 3,4,5...it felt like your long term friend that you like

    New friendship at the end, second to last line...is different from check behind the curtain guy...as you can tell I didn't pick up a warm fuzzy...there are other fish in the sea...and someone new swims by and says hello

    Smile have fun and enjoy the journey...at times it's bumpy, but you got this

    Nick



  • Sigh - with the job. I mean it really is not my cup of tea anyway - but that just means it's back to job hunting. So I'll be writing back to you on that in the months ahead 😛

    Oh so the power guy/self-serving one you picked up on is actually the ex? Well that could be true too - since he has gone back to acting like I don't exist. Someone else caught his fancy lately too.

    You made me laugh with "check behind the curtain guy". Thanks for that 🙂 Yeah I do feel its too good to be true. Find him attractive and all, seems nice too, he's a dancer and I thought wow the Universe has heard me. But well, I have a habit of attracting the wrong guys. And an even worse tendency to act on temptation, because I'm curious. Crossing my fingers that I do not tempt fate with this guy.

    Maybe for now, it's good to stick with friends, tried and true 🙂 And look out for Nemo.

    Thanks for your advice - really appreciate it. Take care!



  • Oh and the word "knowing" is special. That called out to me.

    I do know my worth - and will try to ride this tough wave with more emotional sobriety.

    Thanks Nick!



  • this one, "a power guy ...meaning he has position or place...looking out for himself and only for his needs"... is still there...I don't know who he is, but you will;

    your ex I felt was this one

    "there is still confusion..but your getting a handle on it

    this card and the previous card i think go together...something was up with that guy...i get the feeling he wasn't be totally honest"

    the not so warm and fuzzy...I mean he is nice, appears nice, the feel I got was deeper down that you don't see right away... and just a warning to look out for it...."recently you met someone, a guy...has energy and appears nice...look behind the curtain not just at the cover..."

    and of course you pick up on my joke..Nemo is out there....hahahaha


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